Wherever You Go

by Amanda Torrey

  “Well get your ass in there and tell her, you dipshit!” Reed pushed against a stunned Asher. “What are you waiting for?”

  He fell into the room as Simplicity opened the door. The two sisters hovered there while Paisley gasped. He considered gesturing for them to leave, but he didn’t want to insert any asshole-ness and violate some sort of sister-code that he didn’t understand.

  Besides, he couldn’t take his eyes of Paisley. His love.

  Even dressed in a hospital gown and propped up against a pile of sterile-looking pillows, she was the sexiest woman he had ever seen.

  “What are you doing here?” She fiddled with the hospital identification bracelet on her wrist and stared him down.

  He couldn’t help it—she still had a way of intimidating him a little. But only in terms of how easily it would be for her to destroy his heart.

  “Did you really think I’d let you go through this alone?”

  She tilted her head to the side, studying him.

  “I’m not alone.”

  Asher smiled over his shoulder. “True enough. But, not to negate the support your sisters can give you, I do believe I bring something unique to the table.”

  “Oh yeah?” She crossed her arms over her chest, and he did his best to not imagine what hid beneath. What she’d be losing.

  He cleared his throat.

  “I brought these things for you.” He sat beside her bed and rested the duffel bag on her lap. She hesitated before he encouraged her to open the gift. “I researched things you might need as you recover from your surgeries.”

  He watched her face glow as she removed the items—a plush blanket, dry shampoos and soaps, magazines, crossword puzzle books, fuzzy slippers, small microbead pillows to place under her arms as needed, and a fancy kit that had been touted as the thing every woman needed after a mastectomy (complete with drain supply kits and all sorts of other stuff he didn’t understand.)

  She laughed when she pulled out the Wonder Woman nightgown.

  “This is all very thoughtful, Asher.”

  Her smile made him want to crawl into the bed and hold her tight. To climb into her body and fight off the cancer so she could live a full, healthy, normal life.

  But that wasn’t his battle to fight, and despite his normal instinct to take care of the people around him, he knew she had already figured out the best way to care for herself.

  He was perfectly willing to play a supportive role in the movie of her life.

  “How exactly did you research this stuff?” She held the heart-shaped pillow to her chest. He wondered if she realized the significance of that gesture.

  He wiggled his eyebrows. “I went online.”

  “What?” Her jaw dropped. “I think there’s an imposter in the room. The Asher I know doesn’t do technology.”

  “The Asher you know is catching up with the world. He’s quickly learning what he’s been missing.”

  “The internet is a grand place, indeed.”

  “I’m not talking about the internet.”

  “Awwwww.” Simplicity’s high-pitched exclamation was followed by a shuffle of feet and the sound of a closing door.

  He released a pent up breath. He wasn’t the kind of man to want to do anything in front of an audience, but for Paisley, he would have forced himself. He couldn’t pretend he wasn’t glad to be alone, though.

  Paisley reached out and grabbed his hand, managing to look regal even in a hospital bed.

  “Asher. I can’t tell you how much this means to me. I never pictured you coming into the city for anything, let alone to bring me a gift. It’s all very thoughtful.”

  “I didn’t come just to bring you the gift.”

  Paisley looked at their joined hands.

  He grabbed the sides of her head and stared into her eyes—her beautiful, soulful eyes—before lowering himself into her kiss.

  Her passion matched his. She clung to his wrists as if she wanted to pull him away, yet her tongue danced around hers as if they were meant for this one thing.

  She slipped her arms around his neck and he wove his hands into her hair.

  He’d never tire of her.

  Things became very heated very quickly, and since he knew they couldn’t put out the flames while in the hospital, he started humming a song from her favorite boy band.

  She burst into laughter, effectively breaking the kiss.

  “Guess I’m not the only fan!”

  “For you, I’ll even listen to crappy music.”

  “Did you listen to the whole album? They are a lot deeper than they appear to the casual listener.”

  He kissed her one more time—on the forehead, on the nose, on each cheek, on her chin, a quick trail around her neck, and back to her lips for a chaste kiss he hoped conveyed his eternal love and devotion.

  The door swung open and a nurse made a joke about interrupting.

  He leaned in to whisper in Paisley’s ear.

  “I’ll never let you go.”

  As he battled the Massachusetts traffic to head home, he listened to her favorite boy band, marveling at how easily the teenaged romanticism could ease the intense worry he felt for his woman. And as he imagined her singing along with the bleeding-heart lyrics, he fell more in love with her every second.

  Chapter Twenty-three

  Paisley shoved away Reed’s hand as she tried to lift her out of the bed.

  “I’m not an invalid. And I swear to the Flying Spaghetti Monster, if that doctor doesn’t hurry and get me the discharge papers, I’ll walk out of here without them. I’ve had enough hospital food.”

  “You act like you’ve been here forever.”

  “That’s because I have been!”

  “Hey, it was your idea to have all of the surgeries at once. If you had waited for the reconstruction…”

  “Do you think these people would have let me come back?” Paisley snapped, irritation flooding every nerve.

  “You have a point,” Reed grinned. “You’re a terrible patient.”

  “Go to hell.”

  “Let me finish braiding your hair, and then I’ll track down the doctor.”

  Paisley clenched her lips tight. She had not been an ideal patient, but she was desperate to get home and heal on her own terms. Everything hurt like hell, and not having the breasts that had formed her identity was stranger than she had prepared herself for.

  She dreaded seeing the look on Asher’s face when he saw her.

  Sure, he had sent cards and balloons daily.

  Sure, he had sent a giant cardboard cut out of her favorite band’s lead singer, much to the envy of at least half of the nurses on staff and the disdain of the other half.

  Sure, he had called her every day, changing the subject to something benign when she pressured him for information on his plans for the rehab, the issues surrounding the fire and the car crash, and the placement of his brother.

  He didn’t want her to worry about him, but she needed something to worry about besides her own pathetic self.

  During several of their conversations, Asher had mentioned wanting to come see her. She had assured him that she was in no mood for company, and that she was ready to send her sisters home even if it meant chopping them into pieces and shipping them via UPS. In truth, though she desperately wanted to see him, she knew he was overwhelmed with dealing with the fallout of his brother’s actions and being there for his niece. He had a world to save in Healing Springs. She didn’t want him to feel even the slightest bit of guilt for not being in Boston with her, especially when all he could do was sit and watch as doctor after doctor, nurse after nurse, sister after sister came in to annoy her.

  “Do you miss them yet, Pais?” Reed’s voice was achingly low as she sweetly wrapped an elastic around the bottom of the braid.

  “Are you talking about my girls?” Paisley shrugged. “You’d be surprised at how much I don’t miss them. I mourned their death before they were cut off. Now I mostly just feel relieved. Besides,
the new ones won’t sag.”

  Reed didn’t take the bait and laugh. She clutched the hairbrush on her lap and took in a deep, audible breath.

  “I’ve always known you were strong, but I had no idea you were such a warrior.”

  Reed’s praise made Paisley feel uncomfortable. Reed was the one who took on five children that belonged to the man she fell in love with. She’s also the one who tossed a prestigious corporate career aside and took a risk most people would be too afraid to take. Her new business was booming, she was an amazing stepmother, and now she was even growing a human inside her.

  The only thing Paisley had done was chop off her parts to stay alive.

  “Oh look—another basket delivery.”

  Reed thanked the orderly who had brought the delivery and set it on the bed beside Paisley—the only space not already occupied by flowers and gift baskets.

  “Who’s this one from?”

  Paisley fought her smile as she read the card.

  “Do you know someone named Harvey?”

  “Oh yeah, good old Harvey. He’s the only drunk I’ve ever liked.”

  “Well apparently he knows me—or knows of me, anyway. And he managed to be inappropriate in twenty words or less.”

  “A new record!” Reed clasped her hands together. “Gotta love the Healing Springs crowd.”

  “Yeah,” Paisley sighed, marveling at the gifts and cards she had received.

  All from people she had known for less than three months.

  Not a single kind word from anyone at work.

  The frantic calls and texts from her firm had stopped suddenly when Reed answered Paisley’s phone and demanded that they stop calling while Paisley was out on medical leave.

  This morning, however, one of her associates had decided to test the waters and sent a text asking something that he easily could have figured out on his own.

  Her boss had probably put him up to it.

  Paisley’s blood pressure had started to rise as soon as the text came in—before she had even opened it.

  That was when she knew she had to make a permanent life change.

  She had gone into this week knowing that she had to return to Boston, to law, to her old, predictable life.

  She had come out of surgery knowing that even if she couldn’t make a life with Asher, she had to start over again in Healing Springs.

  She had spent a lifetime believing that geographical changes couldn’t solve problems, and she still believed in that basic truth. But she couldn’t deny the healing power of the Springs, no matter how mythological.

  A knock on the door startled her out of her reverie. Reed stopped removing cards from the wall and looked at the woman standing in scrubs in the doorway, holding a vase of flowers fresh from the hospital gift shop.

  Reed sent a look to Paisley that begged to know where the heck they’d put another delivery.

  Paisley smiled and started to raise her arm to gesture for Miranda to enter before she remembered that raising her arm hurt like hell.

  “Oh, come on. I may be a NICU worker, but even I know you need to limit your movements, my friend.” Miranda bent over to deliver a swift kiss to Paisley’s cheek. “Hope you don’t mind me dropping in. I was hoping I’d catch you before you left.”

  Miranda vibrated with excitement and something else. Nerves. Yes, Paisley could pick up on the hesitation as if she were a star witness holding back vital information. Paisley almost wished Reed hadn’t left the room so she could help pressure Miranda into spilling her thoughts.

  “I’m thrilled to see you. I’m a complete mess and look like shit, but you’re looking as adorable as always.”

  “You look beautiful. Dare I say, maternal?”

  What the hell? Why would she say such a thing?

  Paisley’s ears grew hot. Miranda had never been insensitive before. And yes, Paisley’s belly was swollen after the surgeries, but her loose-fitting shirt should have hidden that.

  “That was an awful way to introduce what I have to ask you…I’m so sorry.”

  Paisley relaxed her shoulders as she watched Miranda’s pale skin flood with red.

  “It’s just… well, it’s about Pippin.”

  A longing in Paisley’s gut threatened the stability of her heart’s chambers. Why the hell hadn’t the doctor discharged her already? She could have avoided this uncomfortable visit.

  “Did she go home?”

  “That’s the thing. She’s almost ready to go home. Another few weeks, tops. She’s getting stronger every day.”

  Tears of pride pierced the back of Paisley’s eyes and made her sinuses ache. “That’s so wonderful. I’ve worried about her every day.”

  “Well, it would be a good thing if she had someplace to go.”

  “What do you mean?”

  “Her mother wants to terminate her rights, which is probably a very good thing for our little Pippin. But she won’t do it willingly unless…”

  Paisley narrowed her eyes as she watched Miranda bluster. “Unless what?”

  “Unless you agree to take her in.”

  “What?!” Paisley’s heart stopped—truly, undeniably ceased functioning.

  “Remember that day when the mother showed up and left when she saw you cuddling Pippin? She decided then and there that you should be Pippin’s mother. I’m so sorry, Paisley, the timing really sucks, but I couldn’t disagree with her. You are Pippin’s mother. You’re the one she bonded with. You’re the one who needs her as much as she needs you.”

  “This is a ridiculous conversation.” Paisley fiddled with her bracelet.

  “You don’t have to agree, Paisley. It’ll go through court and her rights will be terminated either way, most likely. It’ll take some time, but they’ll place her in a foster home. She has no family—too much drug and gang violence.”

  “I don’t know how that would even work. I mean, I just had these surgeries, and I—”

  If she told Miranda she had decided to move to New Hampshire permanently, would the deal be off the table?

  Or maybe she had decided too hastily. Maybe she could maintain her life in Boston, after all. She could be a single mom and raise a beautiful little miracle baby. She could hire a nanny or an au pair and negotiate mommy hours with her firm. They’d hate the idea—her boss had often complimented her on not being family crazy—but considering how much they had been harassing her while she was out on leave, he had to know how much they needed her, thus buying her some flexibility.

  Oh, the temptation. The beautiful, wonderful, wild temptation.

  Or maybe, just maybe, she could adopt little Pippin, marry Asher, and live happily-ever-after tucked in the warm glow of Healing Springs.

  Life tended to be a this-or-that proposition for Paisley, though. She had no business thinking that she could make all of her wildest fantasies come true.

  She took a deep breath, wincing at the sharp pain, and looked into Miranda’s kind, hopeful eyes.

  “I had planned to move to New Hampshire and leave the firm.”

  “That’s perfect! I’ve heard New Hampshire is a great place to raise children. I’m sure a court would have no problem with that.”

  A nice little cottage. A baby. And Asher.

  She closed her eyes against the fantasy.

  This couldn’t be happening.

  She knew she couldn’t not adopt Pippin. She had bonded with her. She had allowed the tiny little thing to worm her way into her heart.

  This may be her only chance to have a baby, and it had fallen into her lap.

  Her mother’s voice sang in her head. Something about unexpected blessings being the best kind.

  Taking on the responsibility of Pippin was the one thing she was totally certain about.

  And hopefully she’d be able to convince Asher that he wanted this life, too.

  Miranda had to rush off to get back on shift, but she promised to pass Paisley’s contact info along to the appropriate people.

  Reed came in
as Miranda floated out of the room, and her quizzical look as she followed the ball of energy’s path made Paisley burst out laughing.

  “Okay, who was that miracle worker and what drugs did she give you, because I haven’t seen you this happy in, well, maybe ever.”

  Paisley didn’t brush away the tears that danced their way over her cheeks.

  “Seriously, Pais. Is this a weird reaction to pain? I can ask if you can have another pill before we leave. You should stay ahead of the pain whenever possible.”

  “I’m not in pain. Not badly. I’m just insanely happy. In love. And luckier than a woman has the right to be.”

  A strong voice piped in, “That’s my cue, I think.”

  Paisley turned slowly toward Asher’s voice, surprised at how his mere presence could make her heart jump up and do the Macarena.

  “You came back.”

  “Course I did. I heard it was discharge day.”

  “But you…”

  He knelt on the floor in front of her, looking like the most confidently unsubmissive man she’d ever imagined.

  “I want to be the one to drive you home. Now, now—wipe that look off your face. I’m not making you climb up in my ratty old truck. I’ve got a new ride, and I think you’ll like it.”

  “Asher—”

  “Nothing as fancy as the Ferrari, but that was a thing of the past, anyway. I’m much more interested in the future.”

  “Asher—”

  “Oh, and while I’m down here, I have something else for you.”

  He reached into his pocket with his free hand. She gasped and shook her head.

  “What are you doing, Asher?”

  “What I’ve dreamed of doing since the first moment you dragged me to your cottage. What I should have spent more time working toward while we were getting to know each other.”

  Paisley’s mouth dropped open as she stared at the platinum band with the ruby sitting inside a lotus, surrounded by tiny diamonds. The color of the stone closely matched the color of his Ferrari. The color she had told him she loved so much.

  “I want to marry you, Paisley. I want to spend every day of my life trying to figure you out. I want to watch you conquer the world, and serve you dinner while you’re doing it. I want to hold you at night and soothe your spirit so you can continue the fight every damned day. Marry me, Paisley.”