Secrets of My Hollywood Life #5: Broadway Lights

by Jen Calonita

  "What is 90210?" Dylan asks.

  "I'll forgive you because you're British." I laugh, but then I get sort of quiet. "Thanks, Dylan. For understanding about everything."

  "You're welcome." He smiles, showing off the small gap between his two front teeth. "You can't blame a guy for trying. You're quite a catch, Ms. Kaitlin Burke."

  "As are you," I say and kiss him on the cheek. "I guess I'll be seeing you. Call me if you ever come out to my coast, okay?"

  "Will do."

  He touches my shoulder awkwardly. And then I'm off to party.

  * * *

  "TO KAITLIN!" The cheer goes up. We're at Babbo, Mario Batali's restaurant on Waverly Place. We've got a private area near the back and everyone is in a festive mood, including me. I've changed into my final New York City splurge, a Badgley Mischka black floral silk cocktail dress. It has a round neck and a scoop back and a darling rosette detail at the front waist.

  "Thank you." I hold my champagne glass. (Mom said she'd vouch for me in the press that she gave her approval for a little glass of bubbly on this special occasion.) "I couldn't have made it through the summer without you guys." I look at Mom, Dad, and Matty. "The fact that you'd all relocate to New York so that I could try something like this still makes me a little misty. And that Seth and Laney thought I had it in me to tackle Broadway, makes me feel good because I know they always have my back. As do my friends." I look at Liz, Nadine, and Sky, who is actually smiling! "And to my boyfriend who stood by me despite everything I did to muck things up." Austin slips his hand into my free one under the table. "This has been an amazing summer. Now it's time to go home. "

  "We'll be back." Mom looks confident in her white BCBG dress with the black beaded trim around the waist. "I promised the Darling Daisies I'd check in from time to time. I'm even opening a branch in Los Angeles for them. Won't that be fab? We need some of that refined Hamptons spirit on the West Coast and I have more than enough time to run the organization for them. " Laney nods in agreement, but I'm not sure she's actually listening. She accessorized her black Donna Karan suit with two Bluetooths again. Something about a Heidi and Spencer issue. Apparently they ticked off Lauren and Ava, who have actually moved on to torturing them instead of Sky and me, which is perfect because those two already have a nickname for the press to use (Speidi). Yippee! I guess Nadine was right about the attention dying down if we just let the story go.

  "You can come to New York as long as it works with Kaitlin's new shooting schedule," Seth is saying to Mom.

  Yep, I got the show!

  The producers echoed Seth's sentiment, that they were just in town as a formality and that they'd want nothing more than for Sky and me to star in the pilot and the show. They were still filling out the cast, but we would be the anchors. Sky and I signed on the spot.

  Small Fries, current title, will be starring Kaitlin Burke and Sky Mackenzie and will air this November. I'm back, baby! And I couldn't be happier. Seriously, I'm ready for five AM call times, long shooting days, and this new twist of being in front of a live audience for tapings. God knows, this summer I've had the practice.

  "I can't believe we'll both be on the same soundstage." Matty is ecstatic and looks wise beyond his fifteen years in his black Armani suit. His summer tan has already faded thanks to all the hours he's logging on set. Oooh... I can't wait to get pale again too! "Kates, you're going to totally love the studio's cafeteria. They just made a new sandwich in my honor. You know, Scooby is getting lots of love."

  "Please, that's just until we arrive." Sky waves him away with one long hot pink fingernail. Her orange silk floral Laundry dress is just as playful as her current mood.

  "Why isn't there room for you both?" Liz asks and the two are off and running again with their commentary. I think they like it that way.

  "So you think you'll be able to handle these two and me full time when we get back?" Austin wants to know. Now that camp is over, Austin is letting his bangs grow out again, which is just how I like them. He's also back in full-on guy mode with his clothing, ditching the sweats and tanks for great-fitting pants and really nice silk button-down shirts, this one blue. (His sports jacket is lying on the chair next to us.) "Their friendship, which I'm still getting used to even wrapping my head around," Austin continues, "looks like it's going to take a lot of refereeing and I want to make sure that doesn't dig into my time with my girl."

  "It won't," I promise Austin. "If they need that much help, I'll have Rodney hire them a bouncer. I'm all yours when we get back next week."

  "Good, because once you get back to work, you're going to be pretty busy," Austin says. "I'll bet doing a new show is a lot of hours."

  "Yeah," I admit, thinking about that fact. I guess with everything happening so quickly that is the one thing I didn't anticipate. I want to work again and am prepared to, but those hours will probably be long. And I'll be back in the spotlight with the paparazzi, for sure. I guess SKAT is here to stay, which isn't such a bad thing. I wouldn't be surprised if the paparazzi camped outside the studio. Larry the Liar will definitely want a shot of me with my hair in curlers and no makeup. Eek.

  Austin interrupts my thoughts. "What's on your mind, Burke?"

  "Oh, I was just thinking about our first Los Angeles outing." I wrap my fingers around his. I don't want to bring the mood down with my worries. I stare at him, wondering if he'll remember our promise to each other at the beginning of the summer. We said we'd return to Disneyland. It was just a casual promise, but I've clung to it the whole time we've been apart.

  "Disneyland is a go," Austin says with a lopsided smile, which makes me grin even wider. "Nadine got us tickets a few weeks ago."

  "You remembered!" I marvel.

  He puts an arm around me. "Of course I did. Are you really surprised?"

  "I guess not." I lean into his shoulder. "Disneyland it is. A week from Wednesday."

  "Can't wait." Austin kisses my cheek. "First ride definitely has to be Star Tours."

  "Definitely."

  I'm going home, and future craziness or not, I can't wait to get there.

  TO BE CONTINUED...

  Like your favorite TV show, we all take a summer hiatus (that's TV lingo for a well-needed short break from filming), but don't worry, I'll be back. I've got Small Fries to shoot and with a new TV show, new cast, new network, and a new character, comes a lot of hard work and, knowing me, some freak-outs. I know I'm ready for the challenge... or am I? Is TV where I really belong? Is Hollywood? Am I finally ready to embrace my inner Meryl Streep and declare acting my lifelong passion or will I watch Liz and Austin fill out their college applications and question my calling again? One thing is for sure, I've got to make a decision about my celebrity life and stick with it once and for all. This time it looks like fate is going to step in to help me make that choice by asking me to picture my life if it weren't set in Hollywood. Will I like that world better than my own? Or will I give anything to get back to my old life and the people in it? There's only one way to find out.

  Look for the final book in the Secrets of My Hollywood Life series, coming March 2011.

  Acknowledgments

  The title alone--Secrets of My Hollywood Life--doesn't lend itself to a book set in New York, but my fabulous editors Cindy Eagan and Kate Sullivan were as pumped to see Kaitlin's Jimmy Choos click-clacking down Fifth Avenue as I was. This is just another reminder of how lucky I am to work with such amazing editors/cheerleaders. I also want to thank Kate S. for all her notes. Her crystal-clear view of New York helped Kaitlin's NYC feel all the more real.

  Thanks too to agent extraordinaire Laura Dail, who always has my back (as well as Kaitlin's) and to Tamar Rydzinski for going over all the little details.

  To the amazing team at Poppy and Little, Brown Books for Young Readers--Ames O'Neill, Melanie Chang, Andrew Smith, Lisa Ickowicz, Melanie Sanders, Elizabeth Eulberg, and Tracy Shaw (for yet another brilliant cover design)--it's because of you all that each new Secrets book is more
buzz-worthy than the last.

  I'd also like to thank my family and friends for all they do to help me do what I love to do! (Got that straight?) Mara Reinstein is my first reader/critic/go-to girl on all things from Hollywood to Prada. My mom, Lynn Calonita, and mother-in-law, Gail Smith, make sure the boys are happy and healthy while I type away.

  Finally, to my husband, Mike, sons Tyler and Dylan, and Chihuahua, Jack--who are always waiting for me to shut off the computer--thank you for being the best support system a wife, mom, and author could have.

  LOVE SecreTs OF MY HOLLYWOOD LIFe?

  Jen Calonita takes you behind the scenes of stardom again with her newest novel,

  REALITY CHECK

  Sixteen-year-olds Charlie, Keiran, Brooke, and Hallie have just been signed up for their own reality television show. They can't even believe it. "You'll be the new Hills," the Armani-suited executive tells them, "and the hottest thing on our network." How could they say no? But soon enough, cameras following them everywhere and interfering producers surreptitiously scripting their lives start to affect the four best friends' relationships. Charlie, Keiran, Brooke, and Hallie are about to learn a very important lesson: Friends don't let friends do reality shows.

  Keep your eye out for REALITY CHECK,

  Jen Calonita's newest look at what really happens behind the cameras.

  Coming June 2010.

  Lights, Camera, Action!

  "Okay, girls, just act natural," Addison tells us with a big smile. "Forget about the cameras. Just pretend we're not here." Everyone keeps saying that, but it sounds impossible. How am I supposed to pretend that there are not three cameras surrounding our table right now, all of them focused on us?

  We're sitting at the Crab Shack, Hallie's parents' restaurant/boat dock, for our first-ever taping of The Cliffs, and at the moment, I'm so nervous I want to dive off the dock, swim to nearby Shelter Island, and live there permanently. I have my cell phone and my toothbrush in my bag. What more do I need to survive?

  "Should we look at the camera?" Keiran asks Addison nervously.

  Addison shakes her head and the pencil behind her right ear falls onto the dock. She leans down to pick it up, rests it on her clipboard, and fixes her Bluetooth again. It's been glued to her ear the whole time we've been here and she's had several calls, which she's disappeared to answer. This is the first time I've gotten to see Addison at work, but she seems to be really on top of things. The crew hangs on her every word, and she's been pretty efficient about our time, knowing we can't tape all day.

  Unlike the rest of us, who agonized over our outfits for days, Addison is not worried about her work wardrobe. She's wearing a long-sleeved blue shirt, jeans, and sneakers. She doesn't have on anywhere near as much makeup as the makeup artist (yay!) put on us. "I know this first taping is overwhelming for you girls, but I promise, it will get easier," Addison assures us. "Just think of us as the fourth wall to a room. We're not here. Don't look in this direction unless there is something over here other than us that you need to see. In a few days you won't even realize we're around. You're going to become pros fast. You 'll see."

  Taping started faster than we could have imagined. Addison actually called the day after the signing to see if would mind getting a day or two in that week. I almost fell off my chair I was so surprised, but I guess jumping in headfirst is a good thing. I didn't think we had anything exciting planned for that week, but Addison thought everything I mentioned sounded "super" or "perf." She stressed that Susan wanted us to be as natural as possible, so whatever we normally do together should be fine. We decided our first taping should be at the Crab Shack. Hallie's parents were more than happy to let us shoot. The crew got here early to set up and passed out waivers to everyone (they have to make sure people sign one if they're going to be on camera). By the time we arrived, everyone was ready for us.

  "Promise you guys won't mention where I live, okay?" Brooke whispers to me while Addison is still on her call.

  "Brooke, we swear, but you know they're going to find out eventually," I tell her. "It's nothing to be ashamed of."

  Brooke's house is a stately old colonial, and the barn on her property is fully functional and has a bunch of horses that we all take riding. She has a bigger room than any of us, which seems to be redecorated in Pottery Barn Outlet stuff every two years. What's not to like about Brooke's home sweet home?

  "Charlotte," she says stiffly, sounding like my mother. "I'm not a farm girl and I don't want certain people to think I am one."

  I know who she's talking about. Brooke's never gotten over Marleyna Garrison's ribbing in ballet class about how Brooke smelled of horse manure.

  "Okay," I assure her. "Just relax." I have to admit, I'm alternating between nausea and fits of giddiness. We are about to start taping our very own TV show.

  "You're right," Brooke says and breathes a little easier. "This is our starring moment. What am I worrying about?"

  "So, Addison, how do we start?" Hallie asks. "Should we tell a funny story? Or talk about boys?"

  "Or gripe about homework? Family?" Keiran asks. "Should we avoid sounding negative? I don't want to come off as cranky."

  Addison laughs. "Just do what you 'd normally do. Chat. Talk about school, especially since we can't tape you guys there."

  The four of us nod. Talk about school. Talk about school. What about school? Do I mention my possible date with Zac? No, no, that wouldn't be good because then it would be on tape. I'd be talking about him to the world and I have no clue if he'll be around long enough to hear it on TV. Okay, school. Classes? That's boring. Homework? Nah. How much I hate Mr. Sparks? That would just get me an F in social studies. School...

  "Ready?" Addison chirps. "We'll go slow and we can always stop when you want."

  The girls and I look at each other. Brooke puts her hand out and we all give it a squeeze. "Let's get this party started!"

  We've already ordered our usual: mozzarella sticks, clam strips, and a round of Cokes. The order covers the checkered tablecloth. The furnishings at the Crab Shack are pretty cheap--white plastic chairs and patio tables with tacky tablecloths. A large canopy hangs over the fifteen or so tables, giving us some relief from the sun. Food is ordered at the shack window and then your number is called over a staticky intercom so you can pick it up. Definitely not fine dining, but the place is always packed. Not many restaurants around can beat the spectacular scenery. The dock is right on the water and overlooks Shelter Island, a quiet residential town a short ferry ride away. Sailboats and small yachts slip by or dock right here, some with local license plates, others from as far away as Florida.

  "Girls, I've got the perfect opener for us," Hallie says. "I figured we could start out talking about the spring fling. At least that sounds exciting, right?" Hallie fingers her green V-neck sweater that brings out her eyes. It's her favorite shirt and she's wearing it with a denim skirt, tights, and her brown knee-high boots that we covet.

  We all nod. "What do you think, guys?" I ask the crew, but their faces are blank. Fourth wall. Fourth wall. I have to remember that. They're not going to answer us.

  "Perfect!" Addison says enthusiastically. "Let's try it on for size." She turns to the crew, who jumps into action, yells out a few commands, and then someone says "Rolling," faster than I can even catch my breath.

  "Can you guys believe the spring fling is next month?" Hallie asks, trying to sound natural even though I know her voice is an octave higher than it should be.

  "Um, yeah, that's pretty close," Keiran seconds, her eyes moving toward the cameras and back again. I notice she's shredding the napkin in front of her.

  "Has anyone started thinking about dates?" Brooke asks, a mischievous smile on her face. "It's never too early to start." She turns to me. "I know Charlie has her eye on someone."

  My face burns--and it's not that hot out. Thanks, Brooke! "Maybe," I say cryptically. "Don't you?"

  "I always keep my options open." Brooke winks.

  "Wh
at are you thinking of wearing?" Hallie asks. "It's never too early to think of a dress."

  "Oooh! I saw something in Seventeen that was sweet," Keiran gushes and then she's off and running describing it. This somehow turns into a conversation about the lack of great places to shop out here on NOFO. And then before I know it, I'm weighing in on where to find cute clothes, and Brooke is boasting about her amazing sales collection, and Addison is calling cut.

  "Girls, that was amazing!" Addison says and sounds like she means it. "You guys totally forgot the camera was there."

  "We did, didn't we?" I say to the others excitedly, my confidence growing. "That was fun."

  "And surprisingly easy," Brooke admits.

  "A total rush," Hallie agrees.

  "Take a breather, get a drink, and we'll start up again in a few minutes," Addison says as she walks away to take yet another call.

  "Brooke, I loved that line you gave about Tanger being the new Target--everyone who is anyone goes there." Tanger is the outlet mall where we shop.

  Brooke grins. "That was good, wasn't it? And Kiki, you were so cute describing that dress."

  "Do you think we were trying too hard?" Hallie asks with a frown. "I had to work it to be that witty."

  "Nah," I dismiss her. "It's good for us to be funny on camera. They'll like us more, won't they? It's not like we were lying." I did notice our conversation was hipper than normal, but who cares? It was still us. I'm sure it will tone down the more comfortable we get.

  The four of us are so busy rehashing our lines, we barely hear Keiran's phone ringing, "It's my mom," she says. "Hello? What?" She freaks out, making me jump. "Now? I can't. I'm working. Remember, working? But, Mom? Mom? FINE." She runs her fingers through her hair and looks at us worriedly. "I have to go. My mom needs me to watch my brother while she runs to a parent-teacher conference."

  "Kiki, you can't go now!" Brooke complains. "We're in the middle of taping."

  "I have no choice," Keiran says, coming down off her high. She throws tip money down on the table and grabs her bag. "I'm sorry," she says, looking at Addison.