Hope Falls

by Jamieson Wolf

  "If you're through looking at yourself in the mirror…?" Susan said.

  Miriam blushed and clicked over to where the other two women sat and picked up her glass of vodka. Susan had a red colored drink she was sipping out of a straw. "What happens now?" she asked.

  "What's our plan?"

  "You're the plan maker," Naomi said. "You got us this far."

  "And now I don't know what to do." Miriam thought for a moment. "The best thing to do would be to see if there I any information in Howard's office. I know he knows about it."

  "He might be able to lead us to others." Naomi said.

  "I can hack into computer files." Susan said. Miriam and Naomi turned to her. "What?" Susan said. "You pick up some interesting hobbies in life." She said.

  "That gives me an idea." Miriam said. She talked for half an hour. When she was finished, both women wore looks of disbelief.

  "You’re going to sneak into Howard’s office? Are you insane?” Naomi said. “There are a million things that could go wrong! What are you going to do if the computer-" Naomi began

  "I don't want to think about 'What If's'" Miriam said.

  "But you've got to," Susan touched Miriam's hand, looked her in the eyes. "We have to take the what if's into consideration. They are what could make us or break us, you know."

  "You think I don't know that?" Miriam said. "But we have to do something! I'm sick of just sitting here, doing nothing. Breaking into his office is the only way."

  "We're not doing nothing." Naomi said. She gestured to the costume, to Sabrina White. "You think this is nothing. If you'd just let us come with you-"

  But Miriam cut her off. "I'll handle it." She smiled to take the edge of her words.

  Susan and Naomi looked at each other, worried looks on their faces.

  Miriam continued to smile. She was ready to let Sabrina out to play and tomorrow would be her big debut, with or without her friends’ permission.

  THIRTY THREE

  Sabrina's first appearance

  When the sun rose the next morning, Miriam was already getting ready.

  Today would be the first time that Miriam went out as Sabrina White.

  She could feel the excitement of it running through her veins, as if her blood contained wild horses. She was glad that Susan and Naomi had gone out for an early breakfast, and they weren't here to see her getting ready.

  She knew they didn’t approve of her going out on her own; they told her it was too dangerous, too frightening. She had nodded and played along, told them that they would all go together, that she would wait. She didn’t want to wait, though. She would go in on her own and find out what she could.

  She stood facing the mirror and didn't feel very fine at all.

  First, she applied the soft liquid foundation like Susan had shown her. Than she applied a power to blot and cover the face. She smoothed the prosthetic nose in place and held it there with spirit gum. Another layer of foundation, liquid and powder. A soft pink blush to enhance her now pale skin. No more gold tan, no more green eyes. She slid the blue contacts into place and blinked. They put a blue haze over her vision, as if she were swimming.

  As she worked, she could feel herself, Miriam, melting away. The boldness of her alter-ego, Sabrina, was bubbling up, coming to the surface. Miriam hoped that this first exercise in deception worked, that she could fool everyone; especially Howard. It was the only way they could all get out of this alive.

  And she so desperately wanted to survive.

  She took the red wig from its place underneath her kitchen sink and put the wig head on the counter top in front of her. The wig head looked alien like. She remembered the severed head that had been left in her dressing room, fake blood on white script pages, and shivered. Grabbing the curly red wig from its place and smoothed it over her

  hair, over her head. With her head bent down, she pinned it in place with bobby pins. She gave her head an experimental shake. The wig stayed put, it didn't move. She opened her eyes now, to look at her transformation.

  Her eyes were a bright blue that showed intelligence and wit. She smiled, her teeth white and perfect, pieces of coral surrounded by red, thick lips. Her hair was a mass of curls that fell to just above her shoulders. She eyed the ends of her hair. She would have to have them done.

  Her first order of business would be to get her file, to find out what was written in there. How would she do that? She wondered. She went into the bedroom she was using and found her purse that she had left beside her clothes. She would be wearing a low necked lilac colored dress today, leather strap sandals, a dark scarf at her waist. She wanted to flow; she wanted people to notice her.

  With deliberate slowness, enjoying the feeling of movement, Miriam went to her purse and pulled out her nail file. She stuck that in her pocket. She pulled out her lipstick holder and put a few bobby pins inside this, along with a stick of gum, some string and an elastic band. She put the lipstick holder back in her purse after she checked her lips in its small mirror.

  Riffling through Susan's dresser, she pulled out a small pen light, some rope Susan had put there the night before and some mace. Susan was so thoughtful. Miriam smiled. It was good to have friends that cared, she thought.

  She went to the closet and got out her new coat. It went with the dress. It was thick cotton, dyed a dark purple. It had flowers dancing up its arms and its front. She never dressed like this when she had been Miriam Parker; she would certainly not be recognized. Mostly, she thought, because people only saw what they wanted to.

  Smiling at herself in the mirror, Miriam studied her appearance. She looked ready. Her purse held her bagatelles, her little tricks. She itched to use them, to hear the click of a newly unlocked door. But such things were best looked forward to. It would come in time.

  Miriam leaned towards the mirror. "Hello." She said. "How are you? The rain in Spain falls mainly on the plain." She practiced with her new voice. It was light and airy and put her in mind of Marilyn Munroe. Now there was a woman with class, Miriam thought.

  There was a knock at the door.

  At first, Miriam stopped, listened.

  She tip toed to the door and was careful not to make a sound. An old woman stood on the other side of the door holding a basket.

  "Hello?" Miriam said in her breathy voice.

  "Hello?" The old lady said. "Is Miriam Parker there please?"

  "Oh, I'm sorry. She's stepped out."

  "Who're you than?" the woman said through the door.

  "I'm her cousin." Miriam said, thinking on her feet. "She's gone to visit my aunt for a while and I've come to stay here." She heard no response.

  "Hello?" Miriam said. "My name's Sabrina. Is there anyone there?"

  Miriam stood there, listening to the silence out in the hallway and felt the nerves start to tingle and burn in her stomach.

  She looked through the peep hole. There was no one there.

  Strange, thought Miriam. She was about to look through the peephole again when she hard a click, and a large hole was blown through the apartment door. The boom of it was deafening.

  Miriam was thrown backwards, the force of the blast throwing her into the wall behind her. Her head smacked against hard concrete as shatters of her door fell around her in wooden rain. Shards hit her skin like needles.

  When the smoke cleared, Miriam saw the old woman standing there with a double barrel shot gun in her hands. She smiled when she saw Miriam on the floor. "Well, damn, you really aren't Miriam Parker."

  "I told you," Miriam choked, "she's gone to visit my aunt."

  "We know that she hasn't left the city." The old woman said. "We're watching for her. You tell your cousin that we're looking for her."

  "What's this all about?" Miriam asked, panic rising in her voice. She figured she'd play dumb.

  "Just tell your cousin we're looking for her. She'll know what that means." The old woman smiled, tucking the shot gun back into a box left over from a batch of long stemmed roses. "H
ave a nice day now. Sorry about your door." She walked down the hallway, whistling.

  * * *

  She didn't have time to lose; she had to get to the studio while the going was good.

  Miriam stopped in the bathroom to fix her make up and adjust her bra. She looked at herself in the mirror. The excitement had given her a rush of color to her cheeks. She smiled and let herself out of the apartment, taking the stairs two at a time. She would have to find a way to payback Susan for the hole in her door. Across the street from Susan's apartment building was the old woman, carrying her boxed gun.

  Miriam pulled her flowing coat around her and crossed the street while walking behind a van that was going in the same direction. Should she watch where the woman went? Should she follow her to her hideout, or find out what information she could from her? She opted for the latter; she didn't need anyone else knowing she was on to them.

  The old woman didn't hear Miriam until she was right behind her.

  The old woman smiled in recognition before Miriam wheeled back and punched the older woman right in the face. Her knuckles cracked when they hit bone; she had probably broken the woman's cheekbone.

  Smiling, Miriam dragged the screaming woman into an alleyway and

  covered her mouth with her hand. "One more sound and I'll gut you." Miriam whispered hoarsely. "Do you understand?"

  The old woman nodded her head.

  "This is what you get for busting a hole in my friends door. Do you know how much that's going to cost me to fix?"

  The old woman shook her head no.

  "Well, a lot. Now, why are you looking for Miriam?" she lifted her hand off the woman’s mouth and the woman started screaming again.

  Grabbing the woman by the throat, Miriam squeezed until the older woman could not breathe. "I said no sound. Don't screw with me, here, okay? You shot at me; that pissed me off."

  "Any…thing…" the old woman wheezed. "I'll tell you anything….just…"

  Miriam released the woman's throat. "Tell me who you're working for."

  "I'm just an assassin." She said. So, they were sending hired guns to do their dirty work. Kept their hands more clean.”

  "Who sent you?"

  "Howard, Howard Kowalski, said he wanted her dead. I just take the money and run, I don't ask why."

  Miriam had suspected as much. Now, more than ever, she needed to get to the studio, to Howard's office. Her life depended on it.

  "Thanks." Miriam said and she punched the woman once more in the back of the head. The woman dropped to the ground. "Can't have you following me and warning anyone." Miriam said. "But I'm not a killer." She walked out of the alley, marveling

  that no one had stopped to help the old woman. California was no longer the sunshine state it hand once been. She tried not to shake to violently. She had never hit anyone in her life when she had been plain old Miriam Parker.

  It seemed Sabrina White had a mean streak.

  Miriam hailed a taxi by blowing a whistle with her fingers. When she got inside, the cabby took a good look at her in the rearview mirror.

  "Hey," he said, leering at her. "Where you headed?"

  "Hope Falls Studios," she said. She put on her sunglasses.

  "You an actress?"

  "No." Miriam said.

  "You a singer?"

  "No." Miriam could see him ogling her in the rearview mirror. She could feel his eyes on her breasts. "My eyes are not located on my chest." She said.

  "I can't help but look." He shrugged. "Take it as a compliment." He said.

  "There is nothing complimentary about being stared at in the back of a cab."

  "I wasn't staring, I was only looking."

  "In my book, they are one and the same thing." She smiled and looked at him over the top of her sunglasses. "Are we going to get going? I don't have all day?"

  "How long you gonna be, lady?" the cabbie stared at her breasts but, thankfully, moved into traffic.

  "Not long, I just need to pop into the studio for a little bit. Would you mind waiting for me?" she lowered her dress to sweeten the deal.

  He was drooling. "Sure, sure, lady, no problem. I'll even turn the meter off."

  Miriam gave him a blinding smile. "You're an angel."

  The cabbie had the decency to blush. So, she thought. Sex could get you anything your heart desired. Once outside the cab, she put on a large pair of sunglasses and wrapped a scarf around her head.

  She darted into the studio, her high heels clacking against the hard marble floor

  . The receptionist, Louise, looked up at her approach. "Can I help you?"

  Miriam smiled. "I'm supposed to meet Howard Kowalski." She lowered her dress a little more. "I'm supposed to audition." Miriam smiled brighter. "For a part."

  Louise looked Miriam up and down. "And you'd be?"

  "I'm an actress." Miriam tried to keep her voice light and waif like.

  Louise sighed. "Your name honey? What's your name?"

  "Oh, Sabrina. Sabrina White. Like the color." Miriam hoped she wasn't pouring on the stupid act too much.

  "Did you have an appointment?"

  "I don't know. I know he told me to come down, but I couldn't remember what day."

  Louise looked down at the appointment book on her desk. "You're not on the list. Besides," she ran her finger down a white page with a long red fingernail. "Howard isn't in the office today."

  "Oh," Miriam made a few tears come to her eyes, biting her tongue to make herself cry. "Oh, I just feel so stupid!" Here she ripped off the sunglasses so that Louise could see her eyes. The tears made the mascara run and she knew she looked like a raccoon by Louise's reaction. "I'm always getting thing mixed up! I'm just so stupid!"

  Miriam saw Louise soften towards her. She handed Miriam a few Kleenexes. "You just go clean yourself up, dear. The washroom is on the left. I can go find Howard for you if you'd like." She smiled at her. "Maybe I can sneak you in for an audition."

  Miriam beamed at her. "Oh, you'd do that! For me?" She bounced up and down a little. God she hated being dumb. "How do I ever repay you?"

  Louise hushed her. "Now, you just go on. I'll go find Howard for you, Okay? We’ll get this mess sorted out."

  Miriam nodded. "Okay. Thank you so much."

  "Don't mention it."

  Miriam watched her walk down the hallway and didn't turn right until Louise was out of sight. She went quickly down the long hallway to Howard's office. The door was unlocked.

  Slipping in before anyone could see her, Miriam got to work. She ran to the filing cabinet beside his desk, having seen him take her own folder out of there before, its red covers flashing. She pulled open the door and saw a large folder marked "Lifetime Contracts" and began to flip through it.

  Miriam was tempted to take the entire folder and the eight files, all red, within. But that would be spotted, and she could not afford to give herself away at such an early time. She grabbed her own out of the bunch, the one with the name "Miriam Parker" on the top and shoved it up her shirt. Just then, the doorknob on the office door began to turn.

  Miriam grabbed the folds of fabric of her dress around her and looked for a hiding place. She could not be found here. If she had to, she would mace him.

  Listening to his footsteps outside the doorway, Miriam crawled underneath his desk. It was the only place to hide. She only hoped that he didn't look down. The desk hid her well, but not if he decided that his office needed a closer inspection.

  She heard him come into the office. He was yelling at Vera, his secretary. "You're sure there's no answer at her place?"

  "Yes, sir, I've called Miriam twice now and left two messages; she is not in."

  "Well, try her again. I want to make sure she will be at filming tomorrow."

  "She knows her schedule, Mr. Kowalski."

  "Try her again." He said.

  "You've got a meeting in ten minutes with Don Proctor."

  "Alright." He said. Vera left him alone. From her vantage point underne
ath the desk, she watched as he checked himself in a mirror that was by his bathroom, a large silver eye framed in guided metal. "She won't be able to answer if she's dead." Howard chuckled. "I guess Betty did her job."

  There was the sound of more footsteps and Miriam heard a voice outside the office that she recognized as Louise's. "Mr. Kowalski? There's a woman here to see you. She says she has an audition."