A Chance to Dream

by Lynne Connolly

  “No. She would have told everyone and ruined everything for you. I told her I love you, told her I would not marry her. She threatened to cause a scandal and destroy everything I’ve worked for.” He didn’t sound as if he cared. Well she did, and she would refuse him rather than see him destroy his and Perdita’s future.

  She must make the best of what she had. She walked back to him, sat next to him. Immediately he reached out and clasped her hand in his, but he didn’t look at her. “I can’t live without you.”

  “You may have to.” She turned to him, her eyes burning into his. “Lady Judith can cause such scandal that you and your family will be ruined all over again. Marry her, Orlando. I won’t stay and see that. I can’t, please understand me, I can’t. I might go away to my family in Italy for a year.”

  His hold tightened on her hand. He caught her attention, held her gaze, his eyes blazing. “No! Marry me and we’ll face them all down. There must be a way.”

  “I can’t be the cause of so much unhappiness.” She stared at him, her eyes brimming with unshed tears. She couldn’t lift her hand to wipe them away. “I might lose you everything you’ve fought for so long. You spent your life repairing your father’s mistakes. A scandal like this could cost you everything. Lady Judith won’t be silent, you know she won’t.”

  He leaned forward and kissed her lips so softly, so tenderly it did nothing to help her distress. “No. I can’t do it, Violetta, I can’t marry her. I won’t give you up, and I won’t dishonour you.”

  “It’s the only way!” she cried out. Tears flowed down her face unchecked. He drew her into his arms and after an attempt at resistance she sank thankfully into them. He held her and rocked her, as he might have done with a child.

  “No, sweetheart, no it’s not. I’ve been thinking, wondering what to do.”

  She sighed. “I won’t. I can’t.”

  “Will you promise me something?” He spoke in a gentle coaxing tone.

  She lifted her head and he groped in his pocket, bringing out a handkerchief. He busied himself drying her face. “Will you promise not to look back, not to repine? I won’t give you up. But if Judith exposes you as the cause for our broken engagement, you will find it uncomfortable in England. We’ll go away somewhere. Perhaps to Italy, or somewhere else if you’d prefer. I can arrange for my estates to be cared for in my absence and without my obnoxious presence my mother can undo some of the harm Judith will wreak. Don’t fight it, Violetta. I’m not going anywhere without you.”

  “Oh, Orlando!” She couldn’t fight any more. Waking up that morning in his arms, remembering the love they shared, she couldn’t walk away from that. He was right. They had done all they could to avert the scandal that threatened to ruin him. “Very well. I love you, Orlando. If you’re sure, I’ll marry you and damn the consequences.”

  “Oh, my love!” There were no words after that as he took her mouth in a searing kiss.

  By mutual agreement they said nothing to anyone that day. Violetta wanted to write to her mother and speak to Lord Ripley before she told anyone else and he had left for the day. As Lord Lieutenant of the county he’d promised to attend the local assizes, and would be away for a couple of days. Neither was in a hurry, now they had made their minds up, now their course was set.

  They tried not to be too particular during dinner, but Violetta kept glancing at him, to find his regard on her. Once she saw Aunt Virginia watching her, and she smiled. Lady Judith shot her a particularly venomous glance and then looked away.

  After dinner, when the ladies went to the drawing room, Violetta found a book from a side table and sat a little apart but she wasn’t to be left alone for long. She felt the sofa cushions plump beside her and too late she realized she should have chosen a chair to sit in.

  “Miss Palagio, how nice! You enjoy reading?”

  “Yes, on occasion.” She looked up and smiled at Lady Judith. She watched narrowly as Lady Perdita levered herself into a wide chair set close to the sofa with the aid of a slim cane. Violetta found herself smiling at Perdita. At least she’d done something right. She laid the book in her lap.

  “My brother seems very taken with you,” Lady Perdita said. She subjected Violetta to a close scrutiny. Violetta raised her chin. What had she heard? What did she know?

  “Did you know he spoke to me today?” Lady Judith sounded hard, accusatory.

  “I asked him to.”

  “You should know I have no intention of leaving the field for you,” Lady Judith said. She smiled and nodded at someone across the room. “Once I am married to him I will take him away from you. I’ll have the field and I will take every advantage of it. Love is a fickle thing and won’t last long. Mark my words, he’ll have forgotten you in a year.”

  To all eyes it would seem they were engaged in normal social intercourse, but they’d headed her off and now Violetta had to stand her ground and respond. She put herself on guard. She was already feeling fragile after her emotional experience with Orlando earlier in the day, but that must be put aside for now.

  “We will see,” she said mildly. She would not be provoked into saying more than she should. She was sure Lady Judith was trying to provoke her into making a scene, making her more determined not to do so.

  The door was wrenched open and the gentlemen surged noisily into the room. Violetta turned eagerly to the gentlemen and the sight of Orlando crossing the room to her side.

  He stood behind her chair and placed his hand briefly on her shoulder. She felt his touch through her body, but kept still. His hand didn’t linger, but she knew he needed the brief contact as much as she did. He moved to one side, next to Lady Judith, who took this as a mark of favour. She reached her hand up to him. He gave her a glacial smile but made no move to take her hand.

  Violetta didn’t care. The conversation turned general and she excused herself early.

  Only when she’d had Lisette array her in her prettiest, laciest wrapper over a fine gown of silk did she wonder if he would come to her tonight. She wanted him to take away all her fears, all her worries. To stop her thinking.

  She wanted her mother, but she was out of reach. She’d spent all afternoon composing a letter, telling her mother of her hopes and fears, trying to ensure her mother did not take any of the blame.

  The doorknob turned. Violetta turned to the door with a welcoming smile.

  It wasn’t Orlando. It was Lady Perdita.

  Chapter Twenty-One

  Her ladyship closed the door and crossed the room, raking Violetta’s attire with a raised eyebrow. Without being invited, she sat down.

  “I know you, don’t I?”

  “We were introduced,” Violetta replied guardedly.

  Lady Perdita waved her hand carelessly. “Not that. I told Judith I knew you, and she said you looked familiar, too. She came up with an entirely preposterous name.”

  “Who?”

  “It’s of no matter. A notorious woman.” Violetta’s blood ran cold. If Lady Judith had recognized her as La Perla Perfetta the game could well be up. Courage, Violetta.

  Lady Perdita didn’t notice Violetta’s shock. “Then I realized who you were. Or are. A wig and thick spectacles can’t hide everything, Charlotte.”

  Violetta sighed in relief. She knew she had to confess sooner or later to Lady Perdita, about this at least. She could not become family without setting at least some things straight. So she didn’t deny the accusation, but nodded. “You are right. I did spend some time as your companion.”

  Lady Perdita stared at her. “Why?”

  Violetta shrugged. “I wanted to help you. Your mama is my godmother, and I heard of your plight from her. I knew what was wrong, why you weren’t recovering as you should have been. They were spoiling you when you needed a firm hand to get you back on your feet.”

  Lady Perdita shrugged, clearly sceptical. “Is this a masquerade? It’s obvious Blyth knows who you are, who you were. Is he helping you to do this? I won’t see my friends deceived
if you are really someone else. You have done enough, I think.”

  Violetta took a deep breath and tried to explain. “Charlotte Lambert was the masquerade. I am who you see before you, Violetta Palagio of the house of d’Oro. When I arrived in England, your mother told me of your plight and I decided to help you. I went to the agency in my disguise and applied for the job as your companion.” She grinned. “You must not think your mother helped me. She was furious when she realized where I had gone.”

  Lady Perdita raised an eyebrow. “You didn’t do all that to trap my brother?”

  Violetta shook her head, smiling a little. “I knew of him, but I heard he was cold and rarely at home. Not the kind of man to attract me, I thought.”

  “You ensnared him.”

  “No. He ensnared me.”

  Lady Perdita shot her a sudden grin, her whole manner more confiding, more relaxed. “I can well believe that. I’ve seen him do it before. He trades on that cold reputation he has. Did he know who you were from the beginning?”

  “No. I knew what you needed, and I knew I could help you. Later, I wished I could go back, enter your house as Violetta Palagio, but it was too late.” She looked away, biting her lip and then back, forcing a confession she had never admitted before, even to herself. “I like masquerades. I enjoy pretending to be someone else. It is part of my nature, I think.”

  “You did it very well.” Perdita regarded Violetta through narrowed eyes in the assessing way Violetta had come to know well. “It seems I owe you a debt of gratitude. I’m glad I paid you for your services, or I would feel worse.” She leaned back in the chair. “Do you mean to take him away from Judith?”

  “It was not my original intention. I was to come here to begin my entrance into English society, that was all, but I decided to help you first. Then I met your brother, and fell in love with him.”

  Perdita stared at her. “Thank God for that!” She let her breath out in a great sigh of relief. “It would never have done. Judith is entirely wrong for him. You must know that.”

  “Madness,” Violetta agreed, and the very word reminded her of her reasons. “She won’t let go of him now. He is determined to have me, but there might be a great deal of scandal when she tells her friends what he did to her.”

  “I know.” Perdita frowned. “I owe you much, for what you did for me. Leave it with me. I’ll come up with something.”

  They exchanged a conspiratorial grin.

  “Thank you,” Violetta said. “It was unintentional, I didn’t know I would fall in love with him.”

  “We all come to it, or so I understand.” Perdita stood up, leaning only slightly on her cane. “You’re expecting him tonight, aren’t you?” Her gaze took in Violetta’s pretty, provocative wrap, the obvious bareness of her legs, revealed by the open front.

  There was no point denying it. “Yes.”

  Perdita raised her brows. “Then I’d better go.” She turned for the door, but turned back. “I liked you as Charlotte Lambert. I hope I like you as Violetta Palagio. And Violetta Garland.”

  She left.

  At breakfast the following morning Orlando greeted Violetta by getting to his feet and drawing a chair back for her, ignoring the quizzical glances of his mother and stepfather. He attended to her needs, making it obvious to all where his interests lay. Other guests, not party to any of this, were definitely intrigued. There was a new proprietorial air about him that no one present had ever seen Orlando use outside members of his family. The murmurs were all about Orlando and Violetta, and how the absent Lady Judith Wayland would feel about the developments. Violetta ignored them all. Warmed by his love, her course was set. She had ignored scandal before. All she could hope for was that Orlando could weather the course.

  “Mama, would it be convenient for you and Father to see me after breakfast?” he asked, once he had seen to Violetta’s needs.

  “I think that would be a good idea,” Lord Taversall said. When he winked at his stepson, the whole of the present company saw it.

  “Perhaps Lord Ripley could attend, too,” Orlando suggested.

  “Wouldn’t miss it for the world, dear boy,” the marquess, back from his stint as Lord Lieutenant, replied promptly. “I’ll inform her la’ship.” Violetta sighed. It wouldn’t be pleasant, with the Marchioness of Ripley present. Lady Ripley had virtually ignored Violetta while she had been here, not to the point of rudeness, but when Orlando hadn’t troubled to hide his interest in her, she turned decidedly cold.

  Lady Judith was not at breakfast but Orlando had promised to send a note to her room, requesting her presence. Best to get it over with, Violetta decided. She eyed her plate, piled high, her appetite gone.

  The room filled with gentle chatter. Breakfast at Ripley Court was a decidedly informal affair, where guests were encouraged to serve themselves from the buffet on one side of the room, which groaned with dishes of eggs, ham, chops and toast.

  Violetta picked up her fork, only to drop it with a clatter when a sound ripped through the tranquillity of the dining room. A scream. Very loud, very urgent.

  Orlando was at the door closely followed by his stepfather before most of the others had time to move. Violetta followed as soon as she heard Orlando’s cry of “Perdita!”

  Had Lady Perdita fallen downstairs, had she met with an accident? Violetta prayed as she followed Aunt Virginia down the corridor to the source of the sounds. They had not stopped. Another scream rent the air, not as urgent as the first, more of an outraged and angry sound.

  Orlando flung open a door, and the company crowded in as fast as they could reach the room. It was one of the smaller parlours, set out as a print room. The yellow walls and black and white prints provided an aptly stark frame for the scandal that waited inside.

  Lady Perdita lay on the floor, her cane by the door, her skirts up around her knees. The bodice of her morning gown was in scandalous disarray, unhooked down the front exposing the pink tip of one breast and riding low on the other side. On her knees, her dress in similar disarray in front of Lady Perdita, was Lady Judith.

  “Dear God!” Aunt Virginia whirled around to slam the door, but she was too late. Curious guests and two maidservants jostled for a better look. Lady Taversall went to her daughter, now panting and sobbing in distress, pulling up the bodice. Violetta knew what Perdita would rather not show to the public and dropped to her knees to pull down the skirt, covering the scars left by the accident.

  Safe in her mother’s arms, Perdita was sobbing her story. Lady Judith got to her feet and stood silently watching, her face closed of expression. It was apparent to all that Orlando wasn’t going to her support. He stood aside and watched, his face clear of expression.

  “She—she tried to rape me!” Perdita cried between gusts of sobbing breaths. “She asked me to come in here and said awful things, awful! Mama, don’t let her, please don’t let her!”

  Perdita seemed inconsolable. Her mother gathered her into her arms, both of them sitting on the floor, skirts blending together. Violetta stared at Lady Perdita.

  Under the cover of her mother’s arm, Perdita winked at her.

  Violetta blinked in shock, but she couldn’t mistake the sly gesture. Without losing a beat Perdita continued her complaints, sobbing out the whole sordid story to her mother, who unsuccessfully tried to soothe her. It wasn’t until Perdita had made quite clear that Lady Judith had initiated the encounter, that it was blatantly sexual, that it was none of her making and she had fought tooth and nail to prevent it, that she allowed herself to be soothed. Her stepfather picked her up and carried her away, closely followed by Lady Taversall. The other guests murmured and began to move away, no doubt to gossip about this latest, juicy scandal. Letters would be written and dispatched before the end of the day. Violetta had no doubt that Lord Ripley would offer to frank them for his guests. After all, it was the polite thing to do.

  Orlando and Violetta remained, with Lord Ripley. By this time Lady Ripley had arrived, in some dishabill
e, obviously not yet prepared for the day. Her hair straggled down past her shoulders, her gown pulled roughly over her body.

  “Close the door.” It was the first time Lord Ripley had spoken.

  Violetta knew she had no cause to be here, but she would not leave. She crossed the room and closed the door, but stayed inside. She alone had seen the wink, and was probably the only person who guessed what Lady Perdita had been about.

  Lord Ripley took his time, lifting his gaze from his daughter to look around the room. He stopped when he got to his wife. “I think I’m finished here,” he said. The words were so final, so complete. Violetta stood perfectly still.

  “Judith, you have disgraced yourself and the family name. Your brothers are due home from their house party in a few days. I will leave you to their mercies. Needless to say, I cannot countenance giving my permission to a match with Lord Blyth.” Violetta took a deep breath to stop her cry of delight. “You are presently not fit to marry any decent man.” Judith stood, ramrod straight, gazing at her mother as though she could save her.

  All Lady Ripley said was, “For heaven’s sake, Judith, why did you not lock the door?” in terms of general exasperation.

  Judith began to wail, in a high-pitched keening voice. “She wanted me to, Mama, she welcomed me, she said she wanted it! I thought—I thought it was something I could do to keep her!” She turned to her mother, but Lady Ripley held up her hands, fending off her daughter, a disquieting contrast to the way Lady Taversall had immediately gone to her daughter a short time before. Judith started back, tears running down her face.

  Lady Judith had no one. Perdita had been the only person to care about her and now even she was lost. Her mother ignored her, her father was never at home, and her other siblings were either away from home or in the nursery. Violetta felt deeply sorry for the woman, but she was wise enough to realize she could do nothing for her.