Sting

by Jennifer Ryder

  Her chin quivers and she squeezes her eyes shut. Fresh tears roll off her long lashes. When she opens her glistening blue eyes, a crooked smile crosses her lips. She cups my stubbly jaw in her cool hands.

  “I thought I’d never get the chance to tell you how much I love you.” Her voice wavers. “I thought I’d lost you,” she says against my lips, then kisses me, feather-light. I deepen this kiss, but can’t grab her in my arms like I want to. If I did, I’d likely pass out from the pain.

  “Not goin’ anywhere,” I promise her. I may have thought I’d experienced love before, but this? What’s going on here is bigger than that. It’s new; it’s frightening. I never wanna lose this feeling. “I’ll do whatever it takes to make this work. I won’t give up on us.”

  “Whatever it takes, I’m all in,” she promises.

  “Me too.”

  I’m glad we’ve got that sorted. Now I need answers. Fast.

  “Now tell me, why did they admit you?”

  I lean back into the chair and scan over her body as she lies back against the pillows. Where is she hurt?

  She splays her hand over her stomach. Her gaze shifts to her abdomen. “I’m not sure.”

  I resist rolling my eyes. It’s a real fucking challenge not to. She’s not being helpful. I need to know what the fuck happened so I can get a handle on this shit. I need to know how to fix this. My stomach drops. Fuck! Did someone find her and beat her?

  “Talk to me, Blondie. I need to know what I’m dealin’ with here.”

  “I wasn’t coping with the news that you were hurt … and then I saw you lying there when you were flat-lining, and they were trying to bring you back.”

  I flat-lined? Fuck me.

  “Fuck, you saw that?”

  I’ll be having words with every attending nurse or doctor in my path for letting her witness something so traumatic. Fuck. That must’ve been awful.

  My heart sinks, and I have to work harder to breathe. The gravity of the situation crushes me, a giant weight on my chest. It hits home, just how close I came. I was knocking on death’s door, and Willow was there with a front-row seat. Fuck me dead.

  “I’m so sorry, Blondie.”

  “It doesn’t matter now, because you’re here. You came back to me.” She takes my hand and brings it to her lips for a soft kiss. “You came back to us.”

  Us?

  “I’m pregnant. At least, I think I still am. After they dragged me from your room, I started bleeding and then I fainted.”

  Jesus! I’m gonna be a dad? Pride blooms in my chest, but it’s quickly smothered by fear. Bleeding can’t be good.

  She shakes her head and curses under her breath. It’s like she’s upset at herself. Like it was her fault.

  I wince as I twist my upper body so I can reach her. I smooth my right hand over her belly. It’s not as flat as it normally is.

  Alarm bells go off.

  Ryan Clark is about to cry. Here’s hoping I can keep my shit together and not embarrass myself.

  “You mean to tell me that there’s every hope that our baby is hanging in there? He’s gonna make it?”

  Willow nods.

  In the last twenty-four hours, I’ve gone from a whisker away from losing everything, to having it all. Almost. We still have to wait and see.

  “No matter how this plays out, Blondie, I’m here. Every step of the way. I promise.” I rub her belly. Willow sighs heavily and covers my hand with both of hers.

  “Ah, excuse me,” a female voice says from behind us.

  “Hi,” Willow rasps, peering around me.

  “I’m Lucy. Let’s take a little look and see what’s going on,” she says. Her voice is friendly, but not chipper; suitable for whatever outcome we’re facing.

  Wheels squeak across the floor, and once she’s around the other side of the bed, I can take a look at her. Well, because moving from this position is hell difficult. The young brunette is dressed in a white polo shirt with the hospital logo on it, and navy pants. She offers a polite smile in my direction as she moves the machine closer to the bed.

  “I’m guessing you’re the recalcitrant Superman that Nurse Wilson is looking for?”

  “Yeah. That’d be me. There was just somewhere more important I needed to be.”

  “Well, I’ll be sure to tell them to call off the dogs.”

  Lucy shifts her focus to Willow. “Okay, let’s get you lying down. I trust your bladder is feeling pretty full right about now?” she asks, as she lowers the bed sheets to Willow’s hips. She guides the hospital gown up, exposing Willow’s stomach.

  A splash of welcome colour prickles at Willow’s cheeks. “Yeah, I feel like I’m about to burst,” she says.

  “I promise you won’t be uncomfortable for much longer.” The tube splutters as Lucy squirts a blue see-through gel onto the end of the ultrasound scanner. “This may be a little cool to the touch at first,” she warns, just as she glides the hand-held device on the skin above Willow’s pubic bone.

  I grip Willow’s nearest hand tight. In this moment, I’m as helpless as I’ve ever been. There’s nothing I can do to fix this if the news is bad. I make a promise to myself that I will do whatever I can to help Willow through this.

  Black and grey swirls flash up on the monitor. A bean-like blob appears in the centre of what looks to be a black pool. Lucy presses a few buttons on a keyboard, taking still images, then turns up a dial on the side of the monitor. A fast whoomp-whoomp noise fills the room.

  Our baby is alive.

  A tear rolls down my cheek. Then another. Some undercover cop.

  “That, my friends, is your baby’s heartbeat. Nice and strong at 168 beats per minute. I’d say you’re at about eight weeks. Congratulations.”

  “He’s okay,” Willow whispers, and giggles through her tears.

  “Damn straight he is,” I add. Wait, can they tell yet if it’s a boy? I couldn’t even see arms and legs properly. There’s no way they could see junk this early, could they?

  With some paper towel, Lucy wipes the end of the scanner, and hooks it back up to the side of the machine. She wipes the gel from Willow’s skin and helps her sit up.

  “I’ll get the results to the doctor on staff, and, if you wouldn’t mind, here’s a cup if you can give us another sample. They’ll likely monitor you for another few hours, and then, all things going well, I’d say you can head home.”

  “Thank you so much,” Willow says, and smiles as she takes the clear cup with the yellow lid.

  “Yeah, thank you,” I say with a nod.

  “Do you want me to help you to the bathroom?” Lucy asks.

  “Thanks. I think I’ll be okay.”

  Lucy walks with her to the adjoining bathroom, offering her arm for support if Willow needs it. Which she doesn’t. Willow closes the door once she’s inside.

  Lucy’s kind green eyes dart in my direction. She wheels the trolley around beside me and rips at a roll of paper underneath the machine. She hands me a black and white photo of our little treasure.

  “Well, father bear. Now that things are fine here, you’d better get your butt back to your room,” she says, and gives me a cheeky grin. “You look like you’ve been to hell and back.”

  If only she knew.

  “Ha. I’ve never been better.”

  EPILOGUE

  WILLOW

  One year, two weeks later

  My long white sundress flaps in the breeze and the sand squishes between my toes, as Ryan draws me into him with his good arm. I toss my bunch of flowering rosemary to Gabs, seconds before the long-awaited moment.

  His lips meet mine. The kiss that seals our future is soft at first, then grows demanding and hot. Sweet cupcakes, is it hot. Ryan kisses me with a reverence that melts my insides and possesses my heart. Forever his.

  It’s as if our families aren’t here, bearing witness. His focus is only on me. Breathless, he sets me down on my feet. I straighten my beaded headband and press my hands either side of the open
collar of his white shirt.

  We made it.

  Ryan and I are met with warm embraces and congratulations from his parents, and mine. The bright, approving smile from Ryan’s sister, Cass, has tears streaming down my face. She has been nothing short of incredible since she arrived here with her parents two weeks ago.

  Gabs and Sienna tackle us into a group hug, which ends up with the four of us on our butts in the sand, laughing like crazy.

  The outpouring of love, from my family and his, soaks into my soul like the golden rays of sunshine beaming down on us.

  Today is the best day of my life.

  From this moment, I’m only looking ahead. As Ryan said in his vows, the best is yet to come.

  ****

  Warm kisses tease at my neck, drawing me out of a heavy sleep. His breath heats my skin, sending a shiver up my spine. If only I could sleep some more, or just lie here and enjoy the spoils of having a gorgeous man in my bed who is über talented at everything.

  “You were moaning in your sleep,” he rasps.

  “Hmm” is all I can respond with.

  “Happy anniversary, Mrs Clark,” Ryan whispers in my ear, gifting me with the graze of his stubble against my collarbone. Instantly I’m drawn back to my beautiful dream from moments ago.

  Sugar. Our anniversary is today? How bad is it that I nearly forgot?

  I blame Toby. I swear, that boy will be a giant before we know it with the way he feeds. Especially at night.

  “Happy anniversary to you too, Mr Clark,” I say sweetly, and wrap my arms around his broad shoulders as he hovers over me.

  Do we, don’t we? Toby is asleep. The house is quiet. I’m exhausted, but I’m horny as anything. It’s like we’re back to being rabbits again, now that my body has returned to some kind of normal. It’s weird having curves, but Ryan tells me on a daily basis that he loves every inch of me.

  “Ryan,” I say, a hint of a warning to my tone.

  “Uh-huh,” he mumbles against my skin as he kisses my sternum. He tugs down the front of my white cotton nighty, exposing one breast at a time.

  “Boobs are off-limits,” I remind him.

  “How can I not be able to touch? They’re the size of grapefruits. They look delicious.”

  “These, right here,” I say motioning from one nipple to the other, “are Toby’s until further notice.” Ryan would get a mouthful of milk if he toyed with them, now. It’s nearly feeding time.

  “No one told me this’d be part of the deal.”

  “Take it up with the little man next door,” I say, and jerk my thumb in the direction of the nursery.

  “But I get the rest of you?” He raises an eyebrow and presents me with that sexy dimple. As if I could ever say no.

  “Completely.”

  He throws the sheets back and lets his mouth communicate intimately with my body as he makes a trail down my torso.

  “There isn’t an inch of this sweet body that doesn’t get me hard,” he says. Just like every other day. It certainly makes me feel less self-conscious about my post-baby body. He spreads my legs wide and kneels between them.

  Unable to hold back, I squirm, pushing my hips off the bed as he dips his nose into my belly button. He laps at my clit and then blows air onto it, sending a chill of goosebumps to ravage my body. I grip his head between my fingers and push him down further.

  “Should I cuff you again? You can be so impatient,” he says, sarcasm lacing his words.

  Mmm. Yes, I could definitely go the cuffs again, but there’s no time. I’ve got somewhere important to be this morning. “Shhh. Just hurry, before he wakes up,” I whisper-growl.

  My phone vibrates on the bed-side table. Talk about timing. Ryan reaches over and taps it to snooze.

  “What time is it?” I ask.

  “Almost seven.”

  “What! I set it to six-thirty.”

  “I snoozed it twice already. You needed the rest, Blondie.”

  Sugar.

  I try to scramble out of bed. Ryan pins me with his arms, linking my hands above my head. He positions his hips between mine, the fine fabric of my nighty the only obstacle between his hard cock and me. Oh boy.

  “I’ll be late picking up Gabs from the airport,” I inform him.

  “What time does she get in?”

  “In an hour.”

  He scoffs, and rolls his hips, eliciting a long moan from my mouth. “Provided her flight isn’t delayed, she’ll be waiting for at least twenty minutes to get her bags. That’s ample time for what we need to do here.”

  “I just don’t want to be rushed. I need to change and feed Toby, pack him a bag, and I need to make myself look half presentable.”

  Ryan drills me with his dark chocolate pools, and his tongue darts between his lips, wetting them. Then he smirks. In this moment, I know I am about to lose this game.

  “Babe, I’m tellin’ you right now that my wife is not leaving this house until we’ve both rocked in this anniversary. So get on board with it.”

  God, I love it when he gets bossy.

  He dips his head, and presses his soft lips to mine. I welcome his tongue into my mouth as he kisses me with an intensity that momentarily robs me of my sanity.

  “You on board?” he groans out.

  I swallow hard and curl my hands over his rounded shoulders. He keeps his eyes trained on me as I push him downwards and part my legs.

  “As you were, Mr Clark.”

  ****

  RYAN

  I strap a wide-eyed Toby into the navy BabyBjörn pouch to my chest. He kicks his thunder thighs against my sides, and makes a soft cooing sound. The fluffy strawberry-blond fuzz on his head swirls about in the wind. I dip my head and support his neck as he stares up at me. It’s as if he sees right through me with those dark brown eyes. I’d rob a bank for this little guy. I’d do anything for our tiny miracle. The corner of his petite mouth tips to the side. I swear he just smiled at me.

  “He totally just smiled at me,” I brag.

  I totally rock this father shit.

  “I’d say that’s wind,” Willow says, in her I’m-his-mother-and-I-can-read-him tone. Willow fusses with her short blond hair. I’m totally loving this new cut on her. Total MILF, and she’s mine.

  “How do I look?” she asks.

  “Beautiful as ever, Blondie. Come on. Let’s get moving.”

  Willow scurries up beside me, juggling her handbag on one shoulder, and the backpack with all Toby’s bits and pieces on the other. It’s not like we’re in here all day; we’re just gonna be in and out.

  “Are you sure you need all that?”

  She rolls her eyes and huffs.

  “Want me to carry some, then?” I ask, offering my hand. As far as I’m concerned, I brought all the cargo we need.

  She shakes her head and gives me a brilliant smile. I know she’s going to melt into a puddle when she sees Gabby. It’s inevitable. They talk for an hour or more on most days, about God knows what. The girls being apart for the last four months have been tough on Willow, but in saying that, she’s out of the WITSEC program and she has her family back. Her parents are good people and they’ve moved here to be with us. Melbourne was a clear choice for me, not being that far from my parents in Canberra.

  It certainly makes it easier to walk out the door, each day, knowing that we have support. I’m excited with the work I’m doing in the Cold Case unit in the anti-gangs division. It’s interesting work and I’m lucky I’ve struck an arrangement which provides me with a good balance between work and home; something I promised myself, and Willow, that I would make a priority.

  We walk into the terminal towards the baggage collection area and wade through a sea of fresh arrivals.

  A high-pitched squeal has me clutching Toby to my chest with one hand and reaching for the imaginary weapon at my side. Even though it’s been a year, I still fucking overreact to shit like this.

  Willow squeals beside me, drops both her bags, and runs, colliding with som
eone whose bright pink ponytail swishes over her shoulder.

  Trust Gabby to make an entrance, and try to give me a heart attack in the process.

  I grab both bags and march in their direction.

  “Lolo,” a familiar voice screeches. Willow and Gabby untangle their arms from each other and wipe the tears from their eyes. Willow sweeps Sienna into her arms, her mop of long blonde hair flying every which way. “I missed you!” she says, equally as loud.

  Sienna wriggles out of her grasp and rushes over to me. I lean down and give her a hug.

  “He’s so tiny,” she says, pushing her finger at his button nose. “Will he have big muscles, like you?”

  Aw, she doesn’t say big mussies anymore? Man, kids grow up way to quick.

  I chuckle and prod her nose just the same. “I’d say he will, Princess.”

  Toby squirms against me. Heat seeps into my shirt.

  I look down and heave as the stench of fresh baby puke soaks into my shirt.

  “Oh, man. What’s happened here?” I ask Toby, as if he’s gonna talk back to me. “Ah, Blondie? Little help here please?”

  Willow walks over and fishes through the backpack and comes up with a bib and some baby wipes. I unclip the carrier and hold Toby at arm’s length. There’s not a drop of vomit on him anywhere. Nice play, buddy. My stomach flips as she wipes away at my shirt. Luckily, it’s white.

  Willow chuckles softly. “See, always be prepared,” she says with a wink.

  “Where’s my beautiful Tobias,” Gabby says, arms outstretched. I hand her the baby and she makes a series of high-pitched noises that probably only small animals can make sense of.

  “Yeah, but we call him Toby for short.”

  “You’re right, lady,” she says and smirks at Willow. “He looks more and more like his daddy.”

  I lean in close and peck Gabby on the cheek. “You’d better lock up your daughter, then.”

  The look of alarm that ensues on her face is nothing short of priceless.

  ****

  WILLOW

  We load the last of Gabs’ cavalcade of bags into the car and head towards Williamstown. After thirty minutes, we’re almost there. I’m busting inside. I can’t wait to show her the space, talk about the future, and reminisce. Poor Ryan has had to listen to me ramble on for months, and now I get my beautiful friend to myself. My plan is coming to fruition.