A Girl's Guide to Vampires do-1

by Кейти Макалистер

  "That is very interesting. What do you make of this stone?" She tapped the stone indicating the forces acting against me, one whose definition she had particularly stumbled over.

  "Mannaz reversed—not a good stone in this position, eh?" I grinned at her.

  She gave me a feeble smile in return.

  "OK, well, I'd read this rune as a warning against becoming too self-focused and oblivious to others' feelings. This stone says to me that pretty much everyone is lining up to take a swing at you. It says that the very passions and opinions that make you who you are are rubbing some people the wrong way. So in the position of obstacle, it acts as a reminder that it's important to take responsibility for your own actions and not indulge in contempt for those around you who you think are inferior, because underestimating them will bring you down in the end."

  "Oh, that's so true," she said breathily, her eyes wide with amazement. "You are very good at this. Have you done this for a long time?"

  I laughed and scooped up the five cold hematite stones, handing them back to her. "I've done readings in public exactly one time, and that didn't turn out terribly well."

  "You should read them professionally," she insisted. "You have the strength within you, I can see. You have the true gift. It is not everyone who is so blessed."

  "Well," I said modestly, not wanting her to get started on Roxy's half-baked and thankfully stunted idea of me reading the runes for the fair while it was in town, "I can't see anyone wanting to pay me to read the runes. To tell you the truth, I don't hold a lot of belief in their power as anything but a tool to self-awareness, and truly, I really don't know that much about them."

  "That is quite obvious," a snotty voice growled behind me.

  "Hello, Tanya." I stood and smiled at the woman who scowled fiercely at me in return. "Run out of cattle to scare barren, did you?"

  I could see her working through the insult, and when it finally sank in, she curled her lip and spat at me. Literally. I had to jump aside to avoid being hit.

  "Such ladylike manners," I scolded, glancing over her shoulder. Roxy and Christian were strolling toward us, but upon sighting Tanya, Roxy took off like a gazelle, Christian following at a more decorous pace. "Spitting, brawling in public, kicking people down the stairs… tsk, tsk. Whatever will be next? Picking your nose? Scratching your crotch in public?"

  Arielle hurried around the table and grabbed her sister's arm. She said something to her in a low, intense voice. It didn't seem to have much effect on her, though, because Tanya pushed her away and faced me with clenched hands and blazing eyes. Arielle took one look at those eyes and hustled off. I just hoped it was to find help, and was not ashamed to admit I prayed it came in the form of a six-foot-four man with wicked amber eyes.

  "You are not welcome here."

  I pulled out my ticket stub and showed it to her. "This says I am."

  "You try my patience once too often, connasse."

  My French wasn't terribly good, but even I knew what that word meant, and it wasn't in the least bit complimentary. My smile frayed a bit around the edges, but gamely I held on to it. I'd be damned if I let her drag me into another scene. Once she realized she wouldn't get a response from me, I was sure she'd leave.

  "You think you are safe from me, but you are not. Dominic's protection of you will be withdrawn as soon as he has seen you as I have, and as for the other you attempt to arouse"—she tossed her head and snapped her fingers—"he is nothing, a stupid man hired to keep people like you away from us."

  "Whatever," I pretended to yawn as Roxy dashed up to us, Christian on her heels. "Much as I appreciate you painting me as some sort of femme fatale bent on seducing every man she sees, the truth is I'm not trying to arouse anyone. I'm just here to see the fair with my friends."

  "Yeah," Roxy confirmed. "We're just here to see the fair, not arouse anyone, although that's not entirely out of the question if it was the right person."

  "You're not helping matters," I hissed to her. "If you'll excuse us, Tanya, we'll just be on our merry way."

  "You push and push your way to his attention," she snarled at me, stepping to the side to block my exit, "but this I tell you—none of your tricks will work. I will cast a protection spell for Dominic to keep him safe from you."

  Fine. She wanted to snap and snarl, she could do it by herself.

  "Have fun at the dungeon, did you?" I ignored the furious woman in front of me to ask Roxy.

  "Loads. Christian wanted to buy some fur-lined handcuffs, but I told him that was just gross."

  "The handcuffs?"

  "The fur."

  I looked at Christian with speculation in my eye. He gave me one of his warm smiles in return. "I thought it might add an unexpected depth to certain experiences."

  Who would have thought? I was about to mull on the deep waters that stirred Christian, but it was brought to my attention that Tanya didn't like being ignored.

  "You will not turn away from me! You will not brush me off like the stinging bee!" She gave me a shove in my shoulder as she spoke. Roxy whistled low and grabbed my arm. I bit back the desire to kick Tanya in the shins, determined not to let her get to me.

  "I will speak and you will listen. Your plan to push yourself into the fair as a reader of the rune stones will fail. You do not have the skill, no matter how big you make yourself appear."

  I frowned over that puzzling sentence until I shrugged it off, figuring that not only was Tanya obsessed with Dominic and paranoid about me having whatever plan she was convinced I was plotting, she also was losing her grasp on English the angrier she became.

  "You are nothing, you are insignificant to Dominic! You will not succeed."

  I tried to walk away, I really did. I smiled, said, "You're repeating yourself. It's been lovely talking to you, Tanya, really it has, and don't let anyone convince you otherwise," and took Roxy by the arm and tried to walk away, but Tanya wouldn't let me.

  "Salope!" she sneered after me, proving that if nothing else, she had an excellent grasp of gutter French. "Crawl away, that is good. Your weak attempt to bring yourself to Dominic's attention has failed, for you have no talent for divination. Dominic seeks only those who have true abilities, not poseurs. Go back to your hotel and remember who has been victorious this night."

  "Poseur? That's a bit ironic coming from you," I said slowly, turning back to Tanya. Roxy shouldered me aside, her eyes raging with indignation on my behalf. I grabbed the back of her jacket to keep her from tangling with the larger, meaner woman, but she just pulled away.

  "Are you implying that my friend is making a play for Dominic? You're dead wrong, sister, if you are. She thinks he's a creep, a big old creep. And you know what? So do I! So you can just put that in your pipe and smoke it!"

  "Roxy, stop. Don't lower yourself to her level."

  "You are just as bad as she is," Tanya snapped at Roxy, her hands fisted. "You seek the favor of Dominic's eye as well, but you will not have it either. I will cast a spell against you both!"

  Roxy made a disgusted noise and deliberately misunderstood Tanya. "As if I wanted his eye! You're nutso, lady, you know that? And another thing—don't call my friend a poseur. She's very good at reading rune stones, something I'm willing to bet you can't do. If you didn't have your head stuck so far up your butt, you'd be down on your knees begging her to help you guys out."

  "Roxy," I said uneasily. Christian appeared at my shoulder, his eyes narrowed as he watched Tanya with an intensity that made my skin itch.

  "I would rather die than ask that vache to join the fair," she snarled.

  Cow? She called me a cow? Well! I searched my mind for French obscenities. The worst I could come up with was the phrase telling her that her speech was worse than that of a female fishmonger. I figured it would do in a pinch.

  "Good! There's no way I would ever consider working alongside you," I said, moving forward and gently pushing Roxy aside. "Not in this or any other lifetime."

  "La putain
de ta mère," she hurled at me.

  "Right back atcha, babe!" I answered, incensed enough by her continuing attack on me, not to mention the slur on my mother, to go a few rounds with her.

  "Do you both plan to make your arguments a regular part of the evening's entertainment?" a voice asked from behind me. "If so, I wish you'd tell me. I have a slot before the magic show and after the poetry reading that might suit. Perhaps we could even add wagering on the outcome."

  Arielle was directly behind Raphael as he rounded the corner of the tent at a fast walk. My heart did an unpleasant little flip-flop when I spotted him, much like a fish does when it's been yanked from the water. A sudden overwhelming need washed over me, making me want to stand close to him, to smell him, to slide my hands under his shirt and over the planes of his chest. It seemed so very important that I touch him, I actually took two steps toward him before I reminded myself that there were far more important things than my unseemly desires.

  What, I couldn't remember, but I felt sure there was something more important.

  Tanya turned to Raphael and went off in a flurry of a language I didn't know, pointing at me and no doubt vilifying me, my ancestors, and probably my descendants as well. I caught his eye and gave him a mildly apologetic "What could I do, I was just standing here and she walked up and started the fight, I am truly innocent of all things" smile. He quirked a brow, his eyes turning hot and seductive and mesmerizing, and once again I felt the need to touch him, to do any number of things that I was quite sure would raise his eyebrows—among other things—again and again.

  "That's enough," Raphael ordered, holding up his hand to cut off the flow of Tanya's poison. "You are beginning to attract attention, and I doubt if it's the kind Dominic would be pleased to see you soliciting. Why aren't you at your booth?"

  "She ran out of bats' testicles and hares' anuses," I piped up. A corner of his mouth twitched and my knees melted in response. I was just about to damn restraint and fling myself upon him when it suddenly occurred to me that he was cheating. He was pulling mind tricks on me, getting me all hot and bothered via long distance, seducing me with his vampire ability to merge his mind with mine, and dammit, I wasn't going to stand for that! I might have accepted the fact that the only guy who suited me was a soulless undead who lived in darkness and indulged in unorthodox beverage choices, but I'd be damned if I'd just let him waltz into my mind and make it look like I was the one with hot pants! No sir! If he wanted to seduce me, he'd have to do it the old fashioned way.

  "Is it anuses or ani?" Roxy asked in an aside, looking perplexed. "You say octopi, don't you? Shouldn't more than one hare's anus be ani?"

  "I ran out of nothing!" Tanya was saying. "I thought to check on Arielle, and found this evil one with her, puffing herself up like a stoat over the runes."

  "That's a very good question," I answered Roxy, greatly enjoying the furious looks Tanya blasted at both of us. I turned to Christian. "Which do you favor, anuses or ani?"

  He opened his mouth to answer, but Tanya cut him off with a shriek that could have curdled milk. "You mock me! You see how she mocks me? This I will not stand for! I insist that you remove her from the grounds immediately!"

  "No," Raphael said, his eyes narrowed as he pinned her back with a hard, uncompromising look. "I suggest you return to your booth, and make an effort not to speak to her again." I shot Tanya a smug look until he turned the same look on me. "And you could help matters if you were to stay away from those members of the fair who seem to have a grudge against you."

  "Perhaps it would be wise if we were to move on to the next attraction," Christian suggested, but before we could move, we were stopped by a polished voice.

  "A grudge? Someone has a grudge against mon ange? This I cannot believe. Who could wish ill for Joy who has captured my heart?"

  I rolled my eyes as Dominic oozed his way between Christian and Roxy, pausing to give the latter a quick fangy grin. A smaller dark-haired man with the flattest, most expressionless gray eyes I'd ever seen followed him. I gave him the once-over, wondering who he was until he turned those creepy serial-killer eyes on me.

  "Dominic!" Tanya grabbed Dominic's arm and stared at him with eyes so bleak with pain, I wanted to flinch. "How can you abuse me so? How can you say such things in front of that vache?"

  "You know," I said to no one in particular, "I'm really getting tired of being called a cow."

  Raphael raised both eyebrows, giving me a look that could steam the wrinkles out of a prune. I contemplated ripping off all his clothes and molesting him on the spot before I remembered that such an act was sure to be an idea he planted in my head, not one of my own. I glared at him instead.

  "You are angry with me," Tanya continued as if I hadn't spoken. "You cannot mean what you say. I will forgive you this once, but you must not allow yourself to be influenced by her attempts to arouse your interest."

  Arouse—oh yes, what a very nice word that was. I looked at Raphael. He looked back at me. Several parts of me that weren't on public display brought out their pompoms and began cheering.

  "I begin to find you tedious, ma petite," Dominic told Tanya as he peeled her hand off his arm. He turned to his companion. "As I have no further use for her, she is yours if you want her, Milos."

  So that was Dominic's missing partner? I filed away that fact as I took a step toward Raphael. His muscles bunched as if he wanted to move closer to me, but he wouldn't allow himself. I grabbed my hips and ordered my legs to stop listening to his silent siren call.

  "Are you all right?" Christian asked in a low tone that felt like warm velvet brushing against my skin.

  "Fine," I whispered back. "I'm just having a bit of a control issue with a vampire trying to get me into his pants. Nothing to worry about."

  He looked startled. I smiled in reassurance.

  "I do not take any man's leavings, my brother, not even yours." Milos looked over Tanya with an implacable face. "I doubt she would sufficiently interest me."

  "Connard!" Tanya spat at him, and threw herself on Dominic. Milos didn't look at all fazed by her opinion on the marital status of his parents. In fact, he didn't look anything, not even bored. He was the most unexpressive, controlled person I'd ever seen. Raphael might put on an impassive face now and again, but I knew that it was just a mask covering a seething river of emotion. Unbidden, my gaze wandered back to admire his profile.

  "What's wrong?" Roxy hissed in my ear. "You look funny all of a sudden."

  "It's Raphael," I whispered back. "He's doing something to me. Something with his mind. He's evil."

  Her eyes got big.

  "Do not punish me this way," Tanya cried to Dominic, clinging to his cape. He snarled at her in another language and tugged his cape from her grasp.

  "You mean he's merging with you? Right now? This instant?" Roxy whispered her question, one eye on the unfolding scene between the two men and Tanya, the other on Raphael. "What's he doing?"

  I yanked my gaze away from Raphael, determined not to allow him to sway my mind without my permission, instead focusing my attention on Tanya's anguished face. Even knowing she'd tried to do me serious injury by kicking me on the stairs, I couldn't help but feel a twinge of sympathy for the horrible manner in which Dominic was treating her. It was a very small twinge, however.

  "What is it you are whispering about?" Christian leaned in to ask us.

  "It's Joy. Her Dark One is doing something to her mind."

  "Really?" he asked, examining my face. "She doesn't look any different. What is the vampire doing to her?"

  "It is all her fault!" Tanya screeched, mindless of the attention she was drawing to our little group. She spun around and pointed at me dramatically. "She has cast a spell upon you! You are doomed to fall under it unless I can reverse it. I, alone, have the power to save you from her!"

  I waggled my fingers at her. "Boogedy-boogedy-boo!"

  She turned red with fury.

  "She's having visions like before, aren't
you, Joy?" Roxy tugged at my sleeve, dragging my attention back to her.

  "No, it's not like the visions," I whispered out the side of my mouth, too embarrassed to admit that Raphael could have such an effect on me with just a few lewd thoughts planted in my head.

  "Ma petite, you go too far. Mon ange has not the evil presence in her soul. It takes one who knows evil to cast spells."

  "You're not helping calm her down," Raphael told him at the same time I commented, "Ooooh, low blow, Dominic!"

  Dominic just smiled at me and made a corny bow.

  Raphael shook his head, raising his hands in defeat as he took a couple of steps toward me. I switched my attention to him, smiling victoriously as he moved closer. Two could play at this little mind-seduction game. I'd been willing him to come to me, and now he was.

  "Then what is it he's doing?" Roxy whispered in my ear, so low I almost couldn't hear her over the shrieks of anger Tanya was emitting at regular intervals as she lambasted Dominic for his nasty comment. "Joy? What's Raphael doing to you?"

  "Seducing me," I answered, taking a step forward and letting my eyes go all soft at Raphael. I thought he needed a little reward for giving in and coming to me once he realized I had an iron will that couldn't be swayed by a little mind-seduction. His amber eyes opened wide in response. I took a deep breath and inhaled that lovely Raphael scent that wrapped around him. The cheerleading team in my nether parts kicked into overdrive.

  Raphael, with one last look at me that I was sure would turn all the bones in my body to oatmeal, turned back to Dominic. Tanya was on her knees before him, pleading with him to listen to her.

  "If having a nightly catfight is a new attraction," Raphael told him, "you really should consider charging more for admittance." He nodded toward the people gathering behind Dominic and Milos. I turned to grab Roxy and Christian and make an escape while we could, but Christian had disappeared.