Lily's Story: The Complete Saga

by Christine Kersey

  His nostril flared. “You already spent fifteen thousand dollars? What have you been spending it on?”

  “Excuse me! My father left it for me for my education.” Hot tears pushed into my eyes. “Not to support my husband.” Dinner forgotten, I fled the room and slammed and locked the bedroom door behind me.

  Trevor was at the door seconds later, knocking. “I'm sorry, Lily. Let me come in so we can talk.”

  Even though I knew he couldn't see me behind the closed door, I shook my head. “No,” I shouted. “I don't want to talk to you.” When Trevor started pounding on the door I sat up, blinking rapidly.

  “I said to let me in!”

  Confused by his behavior, I was unsure what to do, but certain of his love for me, I opened the door.

  The veins on his neck stood out, and his face was flushed. Instinctively, I took a step back, but he grabbed my upper arms and squeezed.

  “You're hurting me, Trevor,” I cried as the tears started anew, but he didn't seem to hear me.

  “Don't you ever lock me out again!” His face was inches from mine, and spittle hit my skin. “Is that clear?”

  “Yes,” I whispered. A moment later he let go of my arms and I gently rubbed where he’d squeezed.

  Eventually he seemed to notice how upset I was, and tears sprang into his eyes. “Oh, Lily, I'm so sorry.” When he reached toward me, I didn't resist, afraid of his reaction. “Please forgive me,” he said. “I didn't mean to hurt you.” He lifted my sleeve and looked at the red marks where his fingers had been. An injured look came into his eyes. “Lily, my sweet Lily. Please, please, don't ever make me do that again.”

  It was then that I knew I'd made a terrible mistake.

  Chapter Thirty-Three

  As I pulled my sweater over my head, I couldn't miss the bruises that had formed on my upper arms. I was grateful the weather was still cold—that way it wouldn't seem odd that I was wearing long-sleeved shirts all the time.

  Trevor had been very solicitous and kind to me ever since the incident several days before, and the idea that I'd made a mistake in marrying him had faded. I knew he loved me as I loved him.

  I'll just have to make sure I don't lock him out again. I mean, how would I have felt if he’d locked me out when I was trying to talk to him?

  I brushed my hair before leaving the bathroom, and when I watched Trevor sleeping, my heart blossomed with love. He was my husband and I wouldn't give up on our marriage.

  I know his heart. He's a good man. He's not perfect, but neither am I.

  I tiptoed to his side and kissed him.

  He stirred and opened his eyes. “Oh, Lily. Are you leaving already?”

  “Yes. I have to get to class.” I smiled down at him.

  He gazed up at me, his blue eyes sleepy.

  “What time do you have to be at work?” I asked.

  Glancing at the bedside clock, he groaned. “In half an hour. I guess I'd better get up.”

  I bent toward him to give him another kiss, and when he dragged me down on top of him, I laughed. “Trevor, not now. I have to go.”

  “I'm sorry I couldn't be as dedicated to school as you are,” he said as he gazed into my eyes.

  Love filled my heart as I stared into his eyes. “That's okay. You have to do what makes you happy.”

  He wrapped his arms around me, nuzzling my neck. “The planets must have been lined up just right when you came into my life. I love you so much.”

  I pressed my lips against his. “I love you, too.” I smiled. “Do you remember the day we met?”

  “You mean when you nearly knocked me over?” He laughed. “How could I forget? And you looked so lost that morning.”

  “You showed me where to go.” My eyes brightened in remembrance. “I think I fell in love with you that very day.”

  His eyebrows shot up. “Really? Even after I stood you up?”

  “Yeah,” I paused. “Why did you do that, anyway?”

  “I think Rob needed me to do something for him at the shop.”

  “You stood me up for him?” I asked in mock outrage. “How dare you!”

  “Ah, come on. I didn't even know you yet. I had obligations.”

  “Yeah, sure,” I said with a smile, then pushed myself off of his chest. “I really do have to go now. I'll see you tonight?”

  He smiled. “Yes, you certainly will.”

  As I walked to class, I thought about Trevor and his decision to drop out of school. Obviously getting an education wasn't as important to him as it was to me. But it was important to me that he was happy, and if that meant working at Rob's shop, then that was all right with me.

  “Marriage must agree with you,” Alyssa said as I sat across from her at lunch. “You look great.”

  “Thanks.” I put a French fry in my mouth. “I'm so glad you were able to be there for our wedding. Did the Caldwell's take good care of you after I left?”

  “Of course. They're very nice.”

  “How are classes going?” I asked.

  Alyssa picked up her fork. “Good. How about yours and Trevor’s?”

  I bit my lip. “Mine are fine. But Trevor . . .”

  Her eyebrows drew together. “What about him?”

  Frowning, I went on. “He's not taking any classes.” I watched her face. “He dropped out of college.”

  Alyssa set her fork down. “When did this happen? Why didn't you tell me before?”

  “I . . . I only found out myself the other day.” I unconsciously rubbed the places on my arms where the bruises were.

  “You mean he didn't tell you before the wedding?” She shook her head.

  “Come on.” I wanted to improve Alyssa's opinion of Trevor. “I'm okay with it. He's happy working at the auto body shop. I want him to be happy.”

  “But, Lily, don't you see? He should have talked it over with you first.”

  I had my own frustration with Trevor’s decision and didn't want to hear my thoughts echoed in Alyssa's words. “He's my husband now and I don't feel comfortable with you saying those things about him.”

  She sighed. “Fine. I'll keep my thoughts to myself.” She picked up her fork again and began eating her salad.

  I watched my friend and felt bad for censoring her, but I wasn't up to hearing bad things about Trevor. I had my own conflicting feelings to deal with.

  The apartment was empty when I got home, and I knew Trevor would be at work until late that afternoon.

  At least he's bringing in a regular paycheck.

  I booted up my computer, preparing to work on a programming assignment I'd been given, but decided to check my e-mail first as my professor had said he might be sending some information to the students.

  I recognized my professor's e-mail address.

  Yes, there it is.

  There were a couple of other e-mail messages there as well—one was a mass mailing to all students, and the other email address was one I didn't recognize. I clicked on the unknown one first.

  The moment I started reading it, I realized it was from the sender of the anonymous notes, e-mails and picture.

  I'm sorry if I frightened you. That was my intent at first. I wanted to scare you away from Trevor Caldwell because he's not a nice man. You wouldn't listen. I heard you and Trevor are getting married. I hope it's not too late to call it off.

  Adrenaline surged through my veins, and I took a deep breath to calm myself as I read the message again. It was unsigned and I had no idea who’d sent it. The incident that had occurred a few days earlier blazed into my head, but as I contemplated whether to reply to the message, Trevor’s key turned in the lock.

  Terrified he’d see the message, I exited the email program—but didn't delete the message.

  “Hi, honey. I'm home,” he said as he closed the door behind him.

  I looked up, hoping my face looked normal. “Hi. How was work?”

  He came over and kissed me fervently on the mouth. “Mmmm. It's much nicer being home with you.”


  I kissed him back, squeezing my eyes closed as I tried to push the message out of my mind.

  “What's for dinner?” he asked, flopping on the couch. “I'm starved.”

  “I was going to make a casserole. Do you want to help me?”

  Eyes closed, he rested his head against the cushions. “I'm too tired.” He lifted his head and smiled. “Do you mind doing it by yourself? I just want to veg for a while.”

  “No problem, Trevor.” As I went into the kitchen and began pulling out pots and pans, the message went through my mind, but I shook my head, angry with myself for believing some anonymous person about my husband.

  He’s not a bad person. Not perfect, maybe. But certainly not bad.

  I opened the refrigerator and took out the ingredients I’d need.

  I have to trust myself. I know him better than most anyone. I can't let some stranger play with my mind like that. He loves me and I love him, and one day I want to have children with him.

  I smiled at the last thought.

  Or at least practice a lot.

  I could hear him grumbling in the other room. “What's wrong, honey?” I called out.

  He came into the kitchen, the remote control in his hand. “We really need a new TV. The screen is so small on that one that I have to sit right in front of it to see anything at all. And half the time the sound doesn't work.” He set the remote on the counter as a smile slowly formed on his mouth. “What do you say? Should we splurge and get a decent one?”

  I considered the idea. “Sure, why not? Our first big purchase together.”

  He grabbed me around the waist and spun me around. “Great. Let's go tonight.”

  Laughing, I shook my head. “I can't. I have a programming project due tomorrow and I'm still having a lot of problems with it. What about Saturday?”

  Trevor set me back down. “I could go get one tonight.”

  I turned on the oven and started grating the cheese. “Don't you want to go together?”

  “Of course I do, but I don't want to wait two more days. It's not a big deal. I'll just go pick one up.” He leaned against the counter.

  “How much money do you plan on spending?” I asked, setting the chicken on the cutting board and reaching for a knife.

  “Only a few hundred dollars, I guess.”

  I looked at him. “That's a lot of money, don't you think?”

  “Not really. Besides, Rob gave me a bonus today. That should cover it.” Trevor took out two plates and set them on the table.

  I began slicing the chicken and dropping it into a pot of water. “What was the bonus for?”

  Trevor dug through the silverware drawer. “You know, working extra hours, that type of thing.”

  “Oh.” I was surprised to hear that Rob was such a generous person. “That was nice of him.”

  Trevor looked at me as he pulled glasses out of the cupboard. “That's why I like working there. Rob takes good care of his employees. That's worth something, you know.”

  “I had no idea, but I'm glad to hear it.”

  “How long until that casserole will be ready?” he asked as he placed the glasses on the table.

  “I don’t know. Forty-five minutes or so.” I scrubbed the cutting board with hot soapy water before putting it back in the cupboard. “Why?”

  He smiled mischievously. “I thought if there was time I could run over to the electronics store right now and get that TV.”

  “Trevor,” I laughed. “You're just like a little kid. At least wait until we eat.”

  “Okay, okay,” he laughed. “You win. But I'm going as soon as we're done eating.”

  True to his word, Trevor was out the door the minute we finished cleaning up. I immediately went to work on my programming project, and I was so immersed in it that I didn't realize how long Trevor had been gone until he walked through the door and I looked at the clock. “It's a good thing you didn't go while dinner was cooking,” I said. “It's been two hours. You would've missed dinner.”

  He smiled happily. “Yeah, it took a little longer than I thought it would.”

  I watched his face. “Well? Where is it?”

  He grinned. “You’ll see it in a few minutes. It wouldn’t fit in my car so I got them to deliver it.”

  “I'm impressed you got them to deliver it tonight.”

  “I told the salesman that I'd only buy it if they promised to deliver it tonight.”

  I laughed. “You drive a hard bargain.” My eyes narrowed. “How much did you spend? I can't imagine they'd make such a bargain for a TV that costs only a couple hundred dollars.”

  Trevor seemed to avoid my eyes. “Just wait. You'll be able to see for yourself. I'm sure you'll approve.”

  The doorbell rang and Trevor dashed to open it. I couldn't see the men on the doorstep, but was quite astonished at the size of the box they carried in.

  They were gone a short time later, and as I watched him excitedly open the box, I ground my teeth together. “We never agreed to you buying a big screen TV, Trevor.”

  His obvious joy faded. “I don't have to ask your permission. It's my money. I worked very hard for it, too, I might add.”

  Too tired to argue, I said, “Fine, whatever. I'm going to bed.” I shut down my computer and went to bed, falling asleep long before Trevor finally joined me.

  Chapter Thirty-Four

  All Saturday afternoon Trevor sat in front of his new television and watched sports. I had a lot of homework and also wanted to get the apartment cleaned, and as I scrubbed the toilet I heard him yelling at the announcer on the TV. Frustrated that he was just sitting around when I had a million things to do, I stewed, but didn’t say anything.

  I finished the bathroom and brought my laptop into the bedroom to get a head start on the next week’s programming project, and while my computer booted up, I gathered the papers that explained the assignment and spread them out on the bed around me.

  Knowing Trevor was occupied with the TV, I decided to open my student email account and reread the awful email I’d received.

  I'm sorry if I frightened you. That was my intent at first. I wanted to scare you away from Trevor Caldwell because he's not a nice man. You wouldn't listen. I heard you and Trevor are getting married. I hope it's not too late to call it off.

  With a glance toward the living room, I pressed the Reply button.

  I don't know who you are or what your agenda is, but Trevor and I are already married. I love him with all my heart and I would appreciate it if you wouldn't contact me again.

  I clicked Send and prayed that would be the end of it, and as I contemplated my new marriage, I thought about the fact that the first year could sometimes be difficult as the spouses got used to living together and got used to each other's habits.

  We'll get through it. I know we will.

  The thought cheered me immensely as I signed off my email account and started on my assignment.

  Over the next two weeks I kept busy with schoolwork, and as the first anniversary of my father's death approached, I was grateful for the distraction. I didn't know how I would react to that important date, and I considered just staying home in bed, but knew that would be a bad idea.

  It would be better to keep busy and act as if things are all right.

  I'd told Alyssa about the anniversary and she had agreed that it would be best if I went to classes, even if concentrating would be difficult.

  On the morning of the anniversary of my father's death I woke early and couldn't fall back asleep. I snuggled up to Trevor and thought about how much my life had changed in the last year. I'd gone from being orphaned to being a happily married woman. It was amazing to me that my life could change so drastically in such a short period of time.

  I lay in bed and stared at the ceiling until the sun came up and it was time to get ready for the day. As usual, Trevor was still asleep by the time I was ready to walk out the door, and when I woke him, I felt much sadder than I’d thought I would.


  “Is it time to get up already?” he asked as he rolled onto his back.

  On the verge of tears, I reconsidered whether I should go to school. What I really wanted was for Trevor to gather me in his arms and tell me everything would be all right. “It's seven-thirty, Trevor.” I spoke softly and had to control my voice to keep it from shaking. “Don't you need to get ready for work?”

  “Yeah, I do.” He sat on the side of the bed and looked at me. “Is something wrong?”

  I nodded, tears close to the surface.

  “Well, what is it? I can't read your mind.” He shook his head.

  His reaction was not what I'd hoped for and the tears started leaking out. I was afraid to speak for fear my voice would crack.

  “Lily, come on. You know how much I hate these guessing games.” He stared at me. “Are you going to tell me what the problem is or not?”

  “Don't you remember?” The notion that he’d forgotten a day that was so important to me was stunning.

  He looked completely clueless. “I can't keep track of everything.”

  My sadness was being replaced by anger. “My dad . . . died . . . one year ago.”

  Remembrance dawned. “Oh, yeah. Now I remember you telling me.” He reached toward me. “I'm sorry, Lily. I'm such an idiot. Please forgive me.”

  When he finally drew me into his arms and held me while I let the tears fall, relief that he cared swept over me.

  “Are you sure you should go to school today?” he asked when my tears slowed.

  I shrugged, then pulled back to look at him. “Can you stay with me today if I decide not to go?”

  He grimaced. “Sorry, but I have to work.”

  “Can't you call in sick or something? Take a personal day?” I really didn't want to stay home by myself.

  “I can't do that to Rob. He's counting on me to show up today. We have a lot to do.”

  “What about me? I'm your wife. Don't you know I'm counting on you, too?”

  I can’t believe he’s putting Rob before me.

  His arms went up in surrender. “Hey, don't put me in that kind of position, Lily. I have a responsibility to support this family and I can't just decide I don't want to go to work.” His arms came down and he gave me a patronizing look. “As long as I'm the only one bringing in the money I have to take my commitment seriously.”