Incorporeal

by Julia Barrett

  Maybe Stella or Chester found it after I left.

  Yeah, right; dream on. You bloody idiot. If anyone responsible had picked it up after you left, someone would have called you.

  Sara quickly checked her call log. There were four calls from Dalton and one from Geri, but that was it.

  He’s got it. He’s got my driver’s license. He knows where I live.

  She flew across the kitchen and flipped off the light. He could be out there right now, watching me. She peered through the window into the dark yard.

  “What is it, Sara?”

  Clutching her chest, Sara swung around. “Geez, Nathan, you scared me to death.”

  “I doubt that.” He crossed his arms. Even in the unlighted kitchen, she could make out his stern face. He was completely naked. “Why are you down here? Why did you turn off the light and why are you staring out the window?” He looked her up and down. “And don’t distract me with your body.”

  Sara clutched at the collar of her terry robe. “My, my body?” She could see his erection jutting towards her.

  “Yes, your body, the way you did in the shower. Who has made you so frightened? I’ve already smelled his scent on you so you may as well tell me the truth. I am not the only liar in this room.”

  There was no point in hiding her fear. Nathan could read her like an open book. Sara gave up and sagged against the counter. “He’s got my wallet, my driver’s license. He knows where I live, Nathan. He knows where I live.”

  “Who?”

  “I don’t know.”

  Nathan crowded her, staring over her shoulder into the dark yard. “You know some things. Tell me.”

  Sara held her breath for an instant. She blew it out. “He made me cold,” she said in a rush, “like shivering and shaking cold. He followed me from San Francisco. He tried to talk to me, tried to get me to come with him.” Before she could stop the words, Sara blurted out, “And he has the spirits of dead women around him.”

  Nathan turned towards her, a look of horror on his face.

  Sara grabbed his arm. “I could see the dead women, Nathan. One of the women warned me.”

  “What did she say to you?”

  Sara shrugged. “She said nothing at all. She looked at him and then she looked into my eyes, and I knew. It was a warning. But I didn’t need it, I’d already felt him.”

  “Felt him?”

  “Yes.” The more she remembered about her encounter with the man, the tighter Sara’s hands gripped his arm. “I felt his presence. I felt him before I ever saw him. I’m pretty sure he was watching me at the Ferry Building.” She shook the hair out of her eyes. “To be honest, I don’t know how long he was watching me. What is he?”

  Without a word, Nathan vanished. Sara whirled around, peering in every direction, but as far as she could tell, he’d left the house.

  “Nathan,” she called after him. “Nathan?” There was no answer.

  ***

  Nathan floated over Sara’s property, searching the woods from one end to the other. He looked under every rock, behind every bush and tree, even up into the branches. Incorporeal, he wandered down the road a ways, watching for vehicles. He couldn’t go far before he was pulled back, as if by invisible rope, to the house.

  She shouldn’t live out here alone. It’s too isolated. Her nearest neighbor is a full mile away.

  He will come, of that I have no doubt. As she says, he has her address. If he has this wallet of hers, he’ll know where she works as well, and I can’t go there. I can’t accompany her to her job. He can take his time, formulate a plan. Wait for the perfect opportunity. There’s no need for him to rush. He has all the time in the world, while I may have very little.

  No, he’ll come sooner rather than later. A Demon has no patience for delayed gratification. He’s deciding right now. He might come before dawn.

  Nathan rushed back toward the house. All was dark, but he could make out Sara’s silhouette in the kitchen window. Sara must stay inside. I have no physical body out here. I’m not certain I can protect her if she leaves the house.

  Damn. Why didn’t the Guardian kill the Demon when he had the chance? Destroying the human body harboring it would be, as Sara says, a piece of cake. He could have done away with him and no one would be the wiser.

  Yes, but it’s not permitted. His intervention is limited.

  And yours isn’t?

  Nathan realized he didn’t get a description of the Guardian. Sara hadn’t told him the entire story, but then, he hadn’t waited to hear it.

  In another instant, he stood beside her. “Who helped you?”

  With a cry, Sara flew across the room as though she’d been thrown by a great blast of wind. Clutching the edges of her robe together, she turned to face him. “Don’t ever do that, throw me around like that.”

  “I didn’t throw you.”

  “Yes, you did.”Sara pushed her wayward hair from her face. “Or your power threw me, I don’t know which. I hate it when you sneak up on me like that.”

  Nathan strode across the room and swept her into his arms. “I’m not sneaking and I’m sorry. I’m angry you’ve been put in harm’s way while I remain limited. I’m feeling out of control. You must remember, Sara,” he lowered his voice, “I’m dead. He is not. I had to make certain he isn’t outside your home.”

  Sara threw her arms about his neck, holding on tight. “He’s not out there, is he?”

  Nathan shook his head and carried her into the living room. The lights still off, he sat down onto the couch, folding her onto his lap. “Tell me who helped you, Sara. Someone protected you and I want to know who he is.”

  Sara’s laugh sounded more like a dry cough. “Can you smell him too?”

  Nathan saw nothing funny about the situation. He answered her in one word. “Yes.”

  She cleared her throat. “A man named Chester helped me, a bartender.”

  “What did he look like?”

  “Does it matter?”

  “Yes, Sara, it matters very much.”

  She closed her eyes. “He was tall and dark, scruffy looking, tough and very large. He looked like the kind of man who’d fought in many battles, like, in a war or something. I suppose he would frighten most people.”

  “But not you.” He wasn’t asking a question.

  “No.” She opened her eyes and looked up into his face, a puzzled expression on her own. “Not to me. To me he seemed safe.”

  Nathan closed his eyes. I wish I could go back, to consult with him, but I can’t leave the house and I won’t leave Sara.

  “Chester is like you, isn’t he? He’s dead.”

  “No.” Nathan shook his head and met her gaze. “He’s not like me, but he’s not human either.”

  Sara shivered in his arms.

  “Are you cold?” He asked, pulling her even closer to his bare chest.

  “N…n…no,” she stammered, her teeth chattering. “I’m afraid. I don’t understand what’s happening.”

  Nathan was at a loss for words. In order to reassure her, he’d have to tell her the truth behind his reason for being. He suspected that would frighten her even more. What if I fail her? How do I anticipate his attempt to kill the woman I love?

  Sara spoke, her mouth moving against his chest. Nathan only caught one word, murder.

  “What did you say?” he asked.

  “What I said was; he’s coming to murder me, isn’t he? And that’s why you’re here, isn’t it? Tell me, Nathan, tell me the truth.”

  Nathan didn’t speak. He merely nodded.

  “What happens if he succeeds?”

  Nathan threaded his hands through Sara’s hair, tilting her head back so she could look into his eyes. “He will not succeed, my love. I swear on the soul of my mother this monster will not harm you.”

  Sarah’s hazel eyes widened. “Nathan, what happens if you stop him? What happens to us?”

  He couldn’t bring himself to answer, but there was no need. Sara closed her eyes and
leaned her head against his shoulder. Her arms went about his waist.

  She understands. What more is there to say?

  Chapter Eleven

  Sara poured some coffee. She’d barely slept the entire night. Her eyes felt swollen and gritty. Nathan had remained downstairs, awake and on guard.

  I’d rather he’d held me. I missed his arms around me.

  Sara sipped her coffee and watched the early morning light creep through the bare branches of a big maple tree.

  Things always look brighter in the light of day. Maybe the situation isn’t as dire as he thinks. I’ll call the bar and see if someone turned in my wallet.

  Nathan appeared in the kitchen, fully dressed, boots and all. She noted that his boots were dry.

  “How do your clothes stay clean?” Sara asked.

  Nathan shrugged. “Does it matter?”

  “No, just making conversation.” She watched him retrieve a cup from the cabinet and pour himself some coffee. Such a normal human thing to do. “So, find any serial killer finches flying around my backyard?”

  Nathan slammed his cup down. “This is nothing to joke about, Sara.” Crossing his arms, he did his best to glare at her.

  “Well what else am I going to do, Nathan, cry? I’ve cried enough. I’m cried out. If I believe you, either I die or you vanish from my life.” She set her coffee cup down beside his. “Neither option thrills me.”

  “There is no other option.”

  Sara ran her finger along the edge of her coffee cup. “Well,” she drawled, “I was sort of thinking I might drive down and talk to Chester, see if he can help us. Maybe intercede for us, you know? Can he do that?”

  Nathan turned away from her to stare out the window. “No, he can’t.”

  “Why?” Sara felt like snarling. “Because it’s not permitted? Jesus, Nathan, they give you a body, they let you make love to me; they let me fall in love with you, but nothing is permitted. What is He?” Sara pointed upward. “A court jester or something? Loki? The Trickster? Does He like playing practical jokes? Because He’s sure as shit played a big one on both of us.” Sara strode to the back door. “You know what? God has some ‘splainin’ to do. I need some fresh air.”

  “No.” Moving quick as a cat, Nathan caught her arm. “Stay inside.”

  She tried to wiggle out of his grasp, but her efforts were pointless. He was the lion, she was the mouse.

  “You don’t understand, do you?” Nathan flipped her around, using his greater strength to pin her back against his chest. Sara felt his mouth brush her ear. “You matter, Sara. What happens to you matters. You matter to me. I need to know that after I’m gone, you’ll be here.”

  “But I can’t lose you. I love you, Nathan,” she whispered, forcing the words around the growing lump in her throat. “It’s not fair for Him, or Them or whoever is in charge, to give you this body, to allow me to love you, and then what? Kill you all over again? Take you away from me? Am I supposed to accept this?” She turned in his arms. “I can’t. I won’t. I don’t accept this. It’s not fair.”

  Sara traced Nathan’s full lower lip with the pad of her thumb. “I’m a Jew, Nathan, like your father. I believe God should be held accountable for what He does, just like I am accountable for what I do. It’s cruel of Him to tear us apart.”

  Nathan grabbed her hand and held it. Blue eyes gazed into hers as he brushed his lips over her palm. “Sara, it would be cruel if He left me in this state of limbo. This body, it’s a…” He seemed to struggle to find the right words. “It’s what you would call a loaner. It’s alive and yet, it’s not. I can’t explain any better than that. We’ve been given a gift. No, that’s not correct. I’ve been given a gift. You are my gift, my miracle.” He dropped her hand. “I don’t want to fight. It’s a waste of time.”

  Sara stared at him. He’s right. I’m wasting our precious time. Wrapping her arms around his neck, she drew his head down for a kiss. The instant their lips met, her cell phone rang. Nathan stopped moving, his mouth frozen against hers.

  On the second ring, he lifted his head. “Pick it up,” he said.

  “Let it ring.” Sara tried to bring his attention back to her, but he remained focused on the sound of the phone.

  “Fine.” Sara twisted her way out of Nathan’s arms and reached for her phone.

  “Yeah?

  “Oh, Dalton, I’m sorry, I’m kinda busy with…

  “My night with the publisher? Geez, I forgot all about…

  “The truth? It was one weird night.

  “You what?

  “Now is not a good time. Don’t come over here.

  “But, Dalton, absolutely not. Now is not a good…

  “Wait, what surprise? Don’t hang up.”

  “Damn it.” Turning to meet Nathan’s eyes, Sara pressed the call-back button. “She’s on her way over here. She says she has a surprise for me. I don’t want her involved in this, Nathan.”

  Sara fell silent, listening to the voicemail message. “Dalton, do not come over here right now. I’m not up for company, not even yours. Please pick up this message.”

  She tossed her phone onto the counter. “Shit. She’s on her way over here. Nathan? Where’d you go?” Sara walked from the kitchen to the living room, calling his name. He didn’t answer.

  He must be making his rounds again. How am I supposed to deal with this, with so much unknown?”

  On a whim, Sara retrieved her phone, got online and pulled up the phone number of the bar in Vallejo. She dialed the number, hoping someone would be there this early in the morning.

  On the seventh ring, a woman picked up.

  “Oh, hello, this is great. I’m so glad you answered. I was afraid the bar would still be closed.

  “Yes, I appreciate that. Listen, I was in your bar last night and I think I left my wallet on the table where I was sitting. Did anyone turn in a wallet?

  “No? Well what time do Stella and Chester come in? Maybe I could ask them.

  “Stella comes in at five? What about Chester? What time does he start work?

  “You know, Chester, the bartender.

  “Could you repeat that?”

  Running a weary hand through her hair, Sara sat down at the kitchen table. “Your bartender’s name is Andy? Well, did you have a substitute bartender there last night, maybe a part time guy?

  “No, ma’am, I’m not trying to make your life difficult, but I was there last night and I could swear the bartender said his name was Chester.

  “Yes, sorry, you’re right. Of course you know the names of your employees. I must have heard wrong. Thanks.”

  Sara clicked off. She dropped her head into her hands, mumbling. “This is insane, totally and completely nuts.” Yeah, but your wallet isn’t at the bar, and that’s the problem, not whether Chester’s name is Chester.

  Toying with the phone, Sara wondered if she should call the police and ask them to stop by. If nothing else, she could tell them where she’d lost her wallet and make up some sort of alarming story.

  Like what? Well, I could tell them there was this guy following me and I’m afraid he’ll show up here.

  Yeah, but you can’t tell them about Chester, a man who doesn’t exist, or about the ghost of the woman on the bus. I sure can’t tell them I think the guy following me is a serial killer. They’ll laugh their heads off.

  Been there, done that. Remember? How’d it work out for you all those other times?

  Yeah, that’s what I thought.

  Out of the blue, Sara felt like she was riding a high speed roller coaster and the bottom dropped out. Hands clutching her mid-section, she stumbled to the stairs and wove her way up to the bathroom.

  Oh god, why did I have those oysters last night?

  Chapter Twelve

  “Hey, hey Sara, open the door! Sara, where are you? The front door is locked. You never lock your door. C’mon, open up.”

  Sara couldn’t miss the pounding. “Yeah, Dalton,” she called. “I’m coming, hang on.�
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  She hurried to brush her teeth, run quick fingers through her tangled hair, and pull on a pair of jeans and a sweatshirt. She trotted down the stairs, wondering where Nathan had got to.

  Of course he won’t allow Dalton to see him. He’s gone back to his incorporeal state. I hate that it’s come to this.

  “Dalton, stop pounding. I’m right here.” Sara flung open the front door. Staring at her friend, she felt like she’d been sucker punched. There stood Dalton, grinning from ear to ear, looking like the Cheshire cat. Right behind her was the man who’d so deliberately stalked Sara the night before.

  His smile was warm and amused, but his eyes said, Gotcha. Sara thought she might start to wretch all over again.

  “Look who showed up at my front door this morning, your friend, Mark, toting your wallet.” Dalton waved the wallet in front of Sara’s face. “What’s the matter with you? Aren’t you going to ask us in?” She stepped across the threshold, right past Sara.

  Standing up tall, willing her voice to remain even, Sara blocked the door with her body and an outstretched arm. “What are you doing here?”

  His only answer was that smug smile.

  “Sara, what’s the matter with you?” Dalton scolded from over her shoulder. “Ask him in. He drove all the way up here to return your wallet. After the fun you two had in San Francisco? What on earth is your problem?”

  Sara ignored her friend’s words. When she felt Dalton press against her arm, she shoved her back into the room. “What are you doing here?” she asked the man once more.

  Mark, or whatever his name was, gave her a confident little smirk. “I’m returning your wallet. You left it at the bar, but then, you probably already guessed that.”

  “Christ, Sara, you’re acting crazy. Or are you hung over? Ask him in for breakfast. Look.” Dalton shook something near her right ear. “I brought bagels.”

  “Ask him in.” Sara heard Nathan’s low growl next to her left ear. She refused to turn and look at either of them. She knew he’d be invisible to Dalton anyway.

  “No. How did you get Dalton’s address?”