Collision Course

by C. P. Rowlands

  “I had a meeting today,” Brie said and held the necklace closer.

  “What is it? It looks like a flower.”

  Brie watched Jordan examine the necklace. She rubbed her tired eyes. The last two days had been busy, and she had written on her book as late as possible every night. Her mind was still in bits and pieces after the police station, but her emotions were in worse shape. After a shower, she had fallen asleep almost immediately but both nights had shimmered with strange dreams and interrupted rest. Nightmares of Niki at the police station, anguished, pressed against the glass while Brie could only stand, mute and helpless on the other side. Last night’s dream was the most unsettling. She and Jordan had waited in an unfamiliar room. Jordan had faced her and slowly undressed. Brie had woken, got out of bed, and taken her first sleeping pill in months. Now, searching Jordan’s eyes across the table, she was glad to be here, but the dream lingered.

  George spoke up. “The flower on the necklace is a calyss.”

  “What’s that?” Jordan asked.

  “A mythical flower that some French woman drew about a million years ago,” he said, with a little laugh. “Brie tried to tell us that they grew wild, all over France.”

  “I was teasing,” Brie said defensively. “You guys are always so cutting edge. It was my turn.”

  “Niki backed you up,” George said and turned to Jordan. “Here’s the deal. Niki was always putting us on with that incredibly quick mind, but Brie was usually quiet. Patrick didn’t buy it, but I did.”

  “What?” Jordan scoffed at Brie. “You tease me all the time.”

  Brie made a face at both of them.

  Jordan frowned at George. “Brie was actually quiet?”

  George nodded. “Niki would be out front, quick and talking.” He looked at Brie. “You were the detail person, the one that tied up all the loose ends.”

  Brie nodded with a little shrug. “It’s true. I don’t care. It worked for Niki and me.”

  “Ah,” Jordan said and raised an eyebrow at her. “You were the closer.”

  “Talk on,” Brie said. “I have to wash my hands.”

  In the bathroom, Brie dribbled soap on her hands, remembering the day they had tried to convince George and Patrick that the flower existed. She soaped her hands. Niki had picked her up on campus in her work pickup, an old relic that Niki and her father both loved. Brie had immediately laughed at the streaks of red and brown that covered Niki’s face and clothes.

  “If that’s lipstick, you’re dead, but…” She had licked her fingers and ran them over Niki’s cheek. “But since it’s brick dust, you may live a little longer.”

  Niki had taken her eyes off the road with a sexy smile. “You want to put those fingers somewhere else?”

  George was right. Niki had been more out front. Brie scrubbed her hands. Jordan was more subtle. Her slow, sensual invitation in the dream last night had been without a word, but her eyes had burned with desire. Brie had stared at the angles of Jordan’s tanned arms as clothing fell to the floor. The taut stomach below round, tight breasts with dark nipples. She had shuddered against her raging body, then finally able to move, she had reached for Jordan but woken instead with a sharp breath.

  Brie automatically shoved her hands under the water but jerked them back. It was steaming hot.

  “Damn,” she said and adjusted the water temperature, trying to calm herself. “What now?” She ran a damp towel across her face. She gripped the sink to steady herself, fully wet and ready. Just as she’d been after the dream.

  Brie came back to the booth, still warm and aching. She fixed her gaze on Jordan’s wide, expressive mouth. What would it taste like?

  “Are you all right? Your face is flushed,” Jordan asked.

  Brie shifted in the seat. “Do you know what I did after you called last night?”

  “Called some cute woman? Phone sex?”

  Brie adjusted her body, trying to ease the pressure. “Watch your mouth.”

  “I’m just a tramp. What can I say?”

  “Say you’re sorry. And you’re not a tramp.”

  “I’m sorry. What did you do last night?” Jordan said with a sassy grin. “Your face is still rosy.”

  “Stop it,” Brie said but wouldn’t look at her. “I wrote a few thousand words on my fiction.”

  “That’s great.”

  “You know what that means?”

  “Yes, you’re writing again. Great news.”

  “That means you have to go to your studio and work.”

  Jordan held her hands up. “Well then, guess what I did last night?”

  “Called some cute guy and…” Brie countered and finally looked at her.

  “No, I did some carving.” Jordan’s smile curved into a tease. She had begun work on Brie’s owl.

  They finished their meal and walked across the parking lot to their cars.

  “You had a meeting today? You don’t teach on Tuesdays,” Jordan said, putting an arm around her as they walked.

  “I had a meeting, downtown, with a committee. A paper of mine is being challenged. No biggie. I’m on solid ground and maybe it’ll help me stay focused on my book. God, I hope so. I have a meeting next month with my fiction editor in Santa Fe.”

  “Editor?” Jordan said, her expression interested again.

  “For that third book,” Brie said. They cut across between cars just as the wind gusted and blew leaves back at them. Laughing, they turned their backs to the commotion for a moment.

  Jordan put her arm around her and pulled her close again. Brie leaned her face briefly into Jordan’s cheek, the faint scent of wood mixing with cool air. The dream shaded her mind for a moment and she looked at Jordan. Jordan was looking at her.

  “Let’s get together at my house tomorrow after my therapist’s appointment. Some of Pete’s books might help,” Jordan said.

  They reached the cars and Jordan put her hands on the car on either side of her. Brie blinked. A kiss right now would be perfect. Instead, she said, “I have tomorrow off from both jobs and I’ll take you up on that offer for Pete’s books, and explain what I’m going to have to do in January.”

  “Thanks for tonight.” She took Brie’s hand and studied it. Finally, she brushed her lips across Brie’s knuckles. “I’ll call you after my doctor’s appointment.”

  When Brie got home she didn’t even bother to turn the lights on and walked through the dark house to her bedroom. There was a constant tick-tick-tick of yearning in her body even though she was worn out. Had she taken her vitamin? Maybe it was just PMS. She mentally calculated. No.

  After her shower, she went immediately to bed. The only light in the room was a small light beside the bed. She took the framed photo off the bedside table and laid it over her heart, the glass cold against her skin. Jordan’s lips had felt warm on her hand.

  She held the photo up. “How am I doing, girl? Maybe I should say, what am I doing? I’m still a little foggy, but my hormones have certainly found daylight.” She put the photo down carefully and then punched her pillows. Now she’d have to tell her therapist about that dream, the one of Jordan. And the therapist would just tell her it was because her mind was working again, the writing, creative side of her mind. Or would she? Who knew?

  “I probably should just move to California,” she grumbled. “Night, sweetie. Wherever you are, I love you.”

  Desperately tired, she turned the light off and let her eyes close. Suddenly she came up to her elbows. It’s the first time I’ve ever had a sex dream about anyone other than Niki. “Crap!” she said out loud and collapsed back on the bed.

  Chapter Sixteen

  Dr. Joel Bauer slid into his chair the next morning and Jordan immediately thought of hobbits. She was starting the Tolkien series with Tyler, and Dr. Bauer had morphed into one of the characters. Short and round. All he needed were some of those odd little slippers and a cloak, and he’d be a perfect hobbit. The psychiatrist ran his hands through his thinning, rusty-colored h
air. “It’s crazy out there. I’m thinking of checking myself in.” He made a face at her over his half-glasses. “You look great. I like your new hairstyle.”

  “Someone canceled at my hairdresser’s. I got in early this morning.”

  Leaning back, he surveyed her. “You’re smiling and the tan looks healthy.” He grinned. “What’s this? Sparkling eyes?”

  Jordan unbuttoned the cuffs on her navy blue shirt and pushed them up a little. “We all had our checkups. Everyone’s in great shape.”

  “How’s Tyler doing?”

  “He had an episode several weeks ago, but he’s been fine since then. I spoke to his teacher yesterday afternoon.”

  He shuffled papers. “Let’s see, we set this appointment up over a year ago. Time flies when you’re having fun, huh? How’s the drinking?”

  “Occasional.”

  “What kind of drinking?” he asked.

  “Just beer or wine.”

  “When?”

  “Usually when I get home from work. Very occasionally, Joel, and then just a beer. One.” She thought about that and added, “Well, last weekend I did a little more than just one.”

  “Jordan, that’s drinking. Period. You’ve got to be careful.” He bent, scribbling on the paper. “Charlotte still lobbing guys at you?”

  “Wait until you hear this.” Jordan started to chuckle and told him about her mother, Richard, and the trip to Ireland. “Oh, and Mac Flynn stopped by. He gave me an opening, but I’m still not interested. It’s like I used it all up in that two-year binge.”

  “Used all what up? Does that mean you haven’t had sex in three years?”

  “I never said that.”

  He looked at her and let the papers fall back on the desk. “I apologize. I’m only trying to find out what put the smile on your face.”

  “As if it’s any of your business,” she said. “Actually, it is your business. That’s why I’m here.” She checked out the colorful barberry bushes against his windows. “No.”

  “What?”

  “I said no. I haven’t had sex in almost three years.”

  He absently cracked his knuckles. “You said you’ve had a physical recently?”

  “You should have the paperwork. I had Dr. Kittel send it over.”

  They were quiet as he found the information and looked across it. Jordan noticed the plants in his office needed attention and got up to get a pitcher from one of the cupboards. She filled it with water and began to water each plant. At one time she’d been in here so often that she knew exactly how many plants there were and how to tend them.

  “My plants have missed you,” he said drolly and tossed his glasses on the desktop. “Okay, I give up. Something’s changed in your life. You’re shining…or something.”

  “I made a friend.”

  “That’s always good,” Dr. Bauer said.

  “I was showing Tyler a new skateboard in the park. There’s a house, a cottage, out there that really fascinates me, and I wasn’t paying attention. I hit Brie and knocked us both down. I gave myself a huge black eye and she had a big bruise. We ended up at Urgent Care and I took her out to eat. Since then, we’ve gotten to know each other. We even took the kids camping at her family’s cabin. That was a great weekend.” She filled him in on the last weeks.

  “So, you went to a lesbian club with your new friend, Brie?” he said and cleared his throat. “You confront the woman in the bathroom and then, the same woman makes a scene later?”

  “That woman reminds me of bar women I used to hang out with. Not people I want to know anymore. She crawled right up Brie’s leg.”

  He stacked the papers on his desk and shoved them off to the side. “Jordan, I’m just testing the water because you seem to be alive again. Does this mean you’re changing your lifestyle?”

  “I was helping a friend.” They stared at each other until Jordan held her hands up in surrender. “All right, more than a friend. I’ve personally never known anyone as beautiful as Brie, but she’s interesting. She’s warm, smart, and articulate. Uncommon. I don’t know what it is, and you know what, Joel? I don’t care.”

  “Does the fact that she’s a lesbian have anything to do with…anything?”

  “Of course not.”

  “It’s not a sexual attraction?”

  “No,” Jordan said. “Well, maybe. I almost kissed her.”

  “Kissing? Isn’t that a little sexual?”

  “I suppose. It’s confusing.” She studied her hands thoughtfully. “There’s something else, Dr. Bauer. She lost her partner of thirteen years to a murder, so you could say we have that in common. It just occurred to me that I’ve told her things that I’ve only told you. And every time I do that, it’s a good feeling. Freeing.”

  “Murder?” he said. “Whew.”

  Jordan nodded. “A little over two years ago.”

  “How’s she doing?”

  “She’s trying. It’s funny, it’s the first time I’ve been able to see my own progress. I’ve never known anyone to compare it to, and it’s an odd feeling.”

  “Jordan, think about where you were a few years ago with the alcohol and the bars, and then you dropped into, what did you call it?” He stared at the ceiling, thinking. “The dead zone? You sound as if you’re enjoying life.” He checked his notes. “Do you remember how we ended our last session? You said nothing interested you but your job, carving, and the kids. And you’re not carving.”

  “No, but I’m doing more than whittling. More importantly, I’m getting that little feeling right here.” She patted her heart.

  “That’s good. Jordan, I’m not advising you to fall in love. That’s not the issue here. What I’m talking about is the way you locked up your feelings. Hid them away.” He smiled kindly. “If you’re attracted and you’ve found someone uncommon…and perhaps it’s a little sexual? Plus, you’re carving? Maybe this is it? You’re moving out of that dead zone.” He opened a desk drawer and pulled out some papers. “Have you had any questions about Brie’s lifestyle?”

  She gave him an are-you-kidding look. “Sure I have.”

  He handed her the papers. “This is something you should read, then. It’s interesting information on your relationship with Brie. We have a new term that we’re using in our profession. Sexual fluidity. It’s based on current studies, specifically directed at women. I’d like you to read it.”

  Jordan reached for the stapled papers and read the date. “This was done last year?”

  He nodded. “Basically, it confirms something I’ve been seeing for quite a while. Women connect with the person, not the gender. It’s something you probably already know, as a woman. The emotional connection is much more important than the physical to most women. I’m not saying women don’t like men sexually. I’m simply saying the important connection is the person. Women are more open to a variety of relationships.”

  Jordan scanned the first paragraph. “This looks interesting.”

  He stood. “Would you make another appointment in a month? I’d like to see where this goes. When I see you again, let me know where you weigh in on this information.” He stacked the papers on his desk. “What about Pete?”

  Jordan stood as well. “What about Pete?” She pulled her shirt cuffs down and began to button them but looked at him. “Pete. I forgot. It was five years ago, yesterday, and I forgot.”

  “Why should you remember?”

  “I’m not sure. I’ve never forgotten before.”

  “I think it means you’re getting on with your life.” He walked to the door. “Make that appointment. One last session and I think we’re done.”

  Jordan closed the door quietly, her mind racing. Was that what this was with Brie? Attraction? No. Attraction was the bars. This is different. More of…something. Christ, but what? She’d never been so aware of anyone. She pulled her phone from her pocket but let her arm hang at her side. She didn’t know what this was between herself and Brie except that wherever Brie was, she wanted to be th
ere too.

  *

  Brie leaned against the doorbell of the service entrance to Emma’s gallery. Her hands were full, holding two large lattes. It was a peace offering for not getting down here nearly enough. It would be a good time to talk with Emma, before the gallery opened.

  Emma opened the door, obviously surprised. “Oh, the latte that I love. You are a sweetie.” She held the door open and Brie followed her to her office.

  “Ah,” Emma crooned, taking a sip of the hot liquid. “My taste buds bow to you.” She scanned Brie’s button-down white shirt, washed-out jeans, black leather boots, belt, and jacket. “Going to a biker convention?”

  “How’d you know?” Brie deadpanned. “This is how I’m going to handle all of this crap. I’m heading west on a hog.”

  “Going alone?”

  “If I took anyone, it would be Jordan.”

  “Jordan? Mom said you took her out last weekend?”

  “Yep.” Brie took a drink and looked around the office.

  “Did you forget she’s straight?”

  “Maybe. Lay off, Em. I’ll handle this.”

  “As I said, did you forget she’s straight? Also, I think you should know that her reputation isn’t all that great. Some of my friends remember her from the clubs, several years ago.”

  “I know about that. What’s more important is that she hasn’t done that in over three years and there’s a woman that’s finally caught my attention.”

  “Think of how Niki would view this.”

  The temperature in the room plunged as Brie swiveled to her. “Tell me. How would Niki view this?”

  Emma took a deep breath. “Sorry. That was incredibly stupid.” She took another drink of the coffee. “George and Patrick were in here the other day. They picked up some paintings, one for their restaurant and one for Patrick’s office downtown. They said you’ve been meeting Jordan for dinner? You may as well know that I talked to Mom about you two.”

  “You what?” Brie’s eyes widened.

  “Mom asked how you were and told me what you’d said about last weekend. And I told her about the dinners at Patrick’s, you and Jordan.”