A stiff autumn wind blew around Thomas Teller’s house. Jordan could hear it as she worked in the upstairs dressing room. She zipped her jacket and adjusted her tool belt. Thomas had chosen the marbled top for the counter in his dressing room, and Jordan liked the color. She ran her fingers around the edges, checking it out. Smooth and perfect. She unplugged the router and set it on the floor. It was a good day.
John had met her when she came to work this morning, waving a paper in her face, making her laugh. They had been successful in their bid for the Willis Foundation’s newest project and they had spent some time in their office, looking it over.
Voices drifted up from the yard, drawing her to the window. There were puddles in the yard from last night’s rain and people were carefully avoiding them on their way to lunch. She laid her tool belt on the counter. As she went down the steps she thought of Brie. She hadn’t called last night, but Brie had said she would call when she was ready. Still, if Brie didn’t call today, she’d call or go over to the house. Wait until she told her this news.
She hopped the puddles, playing a little as she walked toward the trailer. Maybe she could talk John into going to lunch with her, celebrate their new contract. “John,” she called out as she walked into their office, but pulled up short. Thomas Teller was sitting in front of John’s desk.
“Excuse me, Thomas. I didn’t know you were here. Great news about our bid. Thank you and thank the Willis Foundation.” She smiled and shook his hand.
“Jordan, wait, I came to talk with you,” he said. “Have you eaten?”
“No, I was just on my way to lunch.” She looked at them both. “Is something wrong?”
“Not at all. Would you and John take a little drive with me and then have lunch?”
They drove in John’s Lexus to an area just north of the central part of Milwaukee, winding through ramshackle homes with broken windows and porches. Many were empty.
“Grant Willis’s father bought this area in nineteen thirty-eight, when he was just starting out,” Thomas explained. “Of course, it looked very different then. He didn’t want what we now call tract homes, but he did want affordable housing. It’d be a Milwaukee version of Habitat for Humanity.”
Jordan scanned the street. “Would the families work on each home, like Habitat?”
He nodded. “I wanted to show you this because we need someone to head up the project. The foundation’s board has authorized me to offer you that position.”
Jordan’s heart pounded. “Me? I don’t have the experience. Shouldn’t this be someone like…” She looked at her uncle.
John grinned. “You have to get your feet wet sometime, honey.”
She simply looked at both men. It was a gigantic offer and would test her to the limits. “You’d be there, right behind me?” she said to John. He nodded.
“Jordan, don’t doubt your skill or your talent. What we want is your vision. Yes, you’re shy on experience, but with John behind you, you can do it,” Thomas said.
“I’d be honored,” Jordan said.
Thomas pointed at a cement slab where kids were shooting hoops. “You’d probably want to start about here. The entire area is shaped like an oblong.”
“Are the plans in place?” Jordan asked, her brain beginning to function.
“Yes, Grant’s plans and then Niki’s revisions are available, but it will be your decision if you take the offer and work for the foundation.”
Jordan sat quietly and tried to absorb everything. Finally, she looked at John. “You promise to help?”
“Of course,” he said.
“Can I have my crew from work? Bix and the girls?”
“Just let me know,” John answered and they grinned at each other. “Actually, you’re going to need all of us. This is huge.”
*
Brie’s night had been filled with restless dreams, scattered bits and pieces of Niki, their life. Then she dreamed of Jordan, alone, in her studio, before finally waking. If there was time today, she’d find Jordan, talk to her in person. She shook her head, feeling guilty. This was her fault. Jordan was just recovering, and this put her at risk.
After a hurried breakfast, Brie finished packing for her flight. She ran off a disc of her manuscript for her editor and put her bag and laptop in the car.
She started a pot of coffee and went into Niki’s office. The handful of discs that she’d already listened to were on the desk. She reached for one labeled “Christmas–New Year.” Thirteen Christmases with Niki and they’d all been different. Niki had a childlike enthusiasm for the season. She loved the decorations, the music.
Christmas music flooded the room and she turned the volume down. Tears pushed at her eyes as she remembered Niki, sitting here, working, listening to this music. She found the remote and fast-forwarded past the music. It picked up in the middle of a sentence.
“…thank you for this Christmas. I’ve had a strange fall. For some reason, I can’t stop thinking about my family. I’ve missed them terribly. You’ve been so busy with your paper, your presentation, but that’s all right and I mean that.”
Brie stopped the recording. “What?” She stared at the wall in front of her. Niki had been in trouble but hadn’t told her? How had she missed that? All she could remember were the hours she’d put in on that damned position paper, the one she’d wanted published.
While she was doing the research, she’d found old clippings and commercial transactions about Niki’s family, extending back into the late eighteen hundreds, when they’d first arrived in Milwaukee. She’d had a TA and a grad student help her assemble a book of every piece of information she could find. They’d bound it and put a photo of Grant Willis’s family on the front, the last one they’d had taken. Brie had snapped the photo herself years earlier.
“God,” Brie whispered. They had been sitting on the floor, the night before Christmas, trading a gift apiece. The rest of their gifts would be opened the next morning at her mother’s. Niki had opened the gift and looked up, stunned. She had simply let it drop and scrambled over to Brie’s lap, crying. At that moment, Brie had thought it was the wrong gift, and no matter how much she had begged, Niki would not explain the tears. About a month later she realized that she saw the book everywhere in the house, lying open. Or Niki would be sitting, reading it.
Brie got up for coffee and brought it back to the office. She mulled that autumn over in her mind before she began the disc again.
“The book you did for me, this Christmas, is probably the best thing you’ve ever given me. Except yourself, of course. I miss my family so much. It doesn’t bring them back, but it reminds me. Thank you. I’m going to try to leave some things around Milwaukee that may be a reminder of the family as well. It looks as if our family will end here, with me, but it was a good run while we ran.”
There was a pause but Brie could hear Niki breathing, so she let it continue. Niki laughed, the one she always saved just for Brie, as personal as a kiss. “I’m writing this down and someday, I’ll put it in a card for you. Let’s see, you are my blue-eyed model with a red-hot heart and glory hallelujah body. Remember that I loved you from the moment I saw you, that day. That beautiful day.” It was the writing on the card that Niki had given her for their anniversary.
And that did it. The disc ended but Brie never heard another breath or word. She was back at the beach, seeing everything. She could feel her heart thunder in her chest. Niki’s skin was warm as she laid her on the sand. Something red. Whose blood was that? She looked around wildly and heard the bike leave but didn’t see it. The smell of exhaust lingered thickly in the air. Niki’s eyes never opened as Brie told her to wait. She’d be right back. She felt the dirt as she climbed the bank to the pavement. An old pickup stopped and an older man got out. He ran to where she lay on the cement. His face shone with fear as she held her hand up to stop him. And then, darkness. The EMS people were above her but it went dark again.
*
After the long lunch wit
h Thomas and John, Jordan came home early. The house was empty but there was a note from her mother saying she had taken the kids to dinner at Richard’s home. Thomas had given Jordan four boxes of information and blueprints from Grant and Niki Willis, and she hauled them into her office.
Still excited, she began to go through the smallest box first. There were letters that were over fifty years old. She could hardly wait to show them to Brie. She would love the historical content, the language that was used. She stopped. Brie sat on the board of the Willis Foundation. She had to be aware of this, didn’t she?
She looked at the time. It was too early to call Brie. She wouldn’t be home from school yet. Tonight, no matter what else was going on, she’d call her and thank her. This was such good news. Everything felt so good. She did a little dance into the kitchen, laughing. While the kids were gone tonight, she might have time to work in the studio.
They had set up an appointment with the foundation board tomorrow, late afternoon. She’d have time to take Brie out afterward. No, wait, Brie was going to New Mexico. Jordan reached for the phone. She wouldn’t have left without calling, would she?
*
The phone rang and Brie raised her head from the desk and looked around Niki’s office. It was almost dark. What time was it? She got up in a hurry but stopped, light-headed and dizzy. Didn’t she have to fly out tonight? Brie made herself go back to the kitchen and check her purse for the flight information, then the calendar. She checked the phone and saw Jordan’s name. She stood there, indecisive. There was time if she hurried.
At least she wasn’t in pain like before, she thought as the hot water cascaded across her in the shower. Her body had healed. But mentally, she was as befuddled as when she got out of the hospital. Suddenly, she was crying again. Why hadn’t they just killed both of them? She was next to dead anyway. Or why hadn’t they spared Niki and taken her? Worse, how could she have possibly almost gotten involved with Jordan? She loved Niki with her entire being. Brie rubbed her aching head, trying to find one clear thought. “Niki?” she said outloud and the word echoed in her head.
She considered the things she might say to Jordan as she went around the house, making sure it was locked up.
It was raining as she left her home. Her mind just would not stay focused. She swerved around a large puddle. Jordan’s place was dark and her heart dropped. Brie pulled into the driveway to turn around but then saw lights in the studio. She found a pad of paper and wrote down some information, then ran to the studio through the rain.
Jordan was sitting on the floor, working on the base of the carving when Brie opened the door.
“Hey, I was just calling you.” Jordan’s face lit up and she smiled her beautiful smile, holding up her phone. “You’re not home. You’re here,” she said, laughing. “Brie, I’ve had the best day.”
Heart pounding, Brie held her hand up. “Don’t get up,” she said. “I couldn’t leave without seeing you. I have to fly out tonight, to New Mexico, and I only have a few minutes.” She walked over to where Jordan sat and looked at the carving. “Jordan, she’s lovely,” she said, looking at the statue. The words were echoing in her head again.
“Here,” she said. “This is where I’ll be and when I’ll be home. If you ever want to talk to me again.” She handed Jordan the information she’d just written down. Going to her knees to look into Jordan’s face, she said, “Jordan, I can’t do this. I’m truly sorry. I don’t know if you’ll ever forgive me but, if you do, please come and talk with me.” Jordan’s eyes went empty. Blank. Brie rose and turned to leave.
“Wait.” Jordan stood. “What can’t you do?”
“You,” Brie said but didn’t turn around.
“Me?” Jordan sounded strangled. “Why?”
Brie’s head dropped, her eyes stinging, but she didn’t turn and kept on walking. She drove away but had to stop down the street because she was crying too hard to see the road.
*
Brie walked out of the Santa Fe airport in a crowd and saw her editor almost immediately. Karen Forbes was an extraordinary woman, and Santa Fe was an extraordinary place. Even the air was sharper and sweeter. Brie gasped as Karen hugged her and squeezed the air out of her.
“My Lord, you’ve melted. I’m taking you to food, hungry or not. Don’t argue with me,” Karen said. They went to a lovely restaurant and Brie ate more than she’d eaten in three days and drank enough wine to relax every muscle in her body.
“You’re thin and you look exhausted. What’s going on?”
Brie sighed. “Do you want the good news or the bad news first?”
“The good, of course.”
“Okay. My professional life, my teaching, my academic work is great. I had two offers from West Coast colleges for next year. And I’m writing on the book like crazy. I’ve written over thirty thousand words in the last five weeks, and I think it’s pretty good.”
Karen grinned and leaned back into the booth. “That’s good, you’re right. The bad?”
“My personal life. It’s like the Taliban. Dark and shadowy. Shifting. And definitely dangerous.”
Karen laughed a little at Brie’s words but stopped smiling as Brie talked about the months since Karen had last seen her.
“You don’t have to listen to this. We can stop right now. I’m thoroughly sick of myself.”
“Are you all right?”
Brie took a deep breath. “What is all right these days?”
Karen got up, gathering their things. “Let’s get you to the lodge.”
Brie handed Karen a large manila envelope. “Here’s the manuscript, and there’s a disc in there. You can get started without me if I sleep late.”
Chapter Twenty-Three
People came and went as Jordan waited for Dr. Bauer at the clinic. Still numb after Brie’s announcement the previous night, she stared at the floor until the nurse called her. Last night had been mostly sleepless after Brie’s appearance in her studio.
As Jordan entered Dr. Bauer’s office, she saw him look at her clothes. She looked down at what she was wearing. She couldn’t remember and was relieved to see the pearl gray suit with a silver shell.
“You look nice,” he said. “Very businesslike.”
“Thank you. I have an appointment after I see you.”
“An appointment?”
“Yes, with the Willis Foundation. Are you familiar with them?”
“Of course. They’re a huge economic force in this area.”
“They have a new project that they’re about to undertake and my company, Kelly Construction, received the bid. They’ve asked me to lead the project.”
“What an honor. Congratulations.”
“I’m so excited that I’m about to fall off the planet.”
He leaned back and regarded her. “You may be falling off the planet, but where’s the sparkle?”
Jordan took a deep breath. “I’m certain that you remember our conversation about Brie O’Malley and her murdered lover?”
“I remember.”
“Her lover was Niki Willis.”
“Willis? As in the foundation?”
Jordan nodded.
“How long ago was that?”
“Two years and a few months.”
“How’s she doing?”
“Off and on, but better than when I first met her. Right now she’s struggling.”
He fiddled with his pen. “As I said, then, it’s an important shared experience.”
Jordan nodded. “The day of my last appointment with you, Brie and I ended up in a meadow at Kaker’s Point, kissing my mind into oblivion. And several times since then. It was…stunning.” She glanced at him. “I even told Mom, just to see if she’d speak to me again.”
“How’d she take it?”
“Mom’s thinking about it, but it’s probably a moot point.” Jordan took a deep breath. “Brie had to leave town on business and stopped by my studio last night. She said it just wasn’t possible for this—for
us—to continue.”
“What?” He leaned forward. “She started this and then…? How are you?”
“We started this. And I’m sad. Shocked. Brie has never been able to recall the shooting, and the other day it suddenly all came back to her. I don’t think she’s in very good shape right now.”
“Sudden recall can blast the mind. But still…”
“This is normal?”
“Normal? I don’t use that word very often. Usually, when this recall happens, it’s devastating.”
“What happens next?”
He shrugged. “It’s unpredictable. I can tell you to stop drinking or stop giving your body away like you did because it’s unhealthy for you, both physically and emotionally. But I can’t advise you here, at least at this point. She’s not my patient and I have no idea where she is in the grieving process. Except to say, it happens and it’s usually traumatic. Sometimes the grieving person will go backward in the process. You know about anger. Fear.”
“Fear? Well, I’m certainly traumatized, no matter what she is. Also angry. And hurt.” Jordan looked at him.
“It’s common to exhibit fear when entering a new relationship, no matter what the age. You were the exception.”
“You’ve always said my anger was a normal reaction.”
“It’s part of the grieving, but then what did you do?”
“I stopped caring.” Jordan shifted in her chair and stared at her hands. “Was that acceptance?”
“Maybe,” he said. “That’s where I see you now. Finally accepting. Moving forward. Do you think it will complicate things, the fact that it’s Brie’s dead lover’s foundation?”
“No. I think this will make her happy.” She knew that much was true. It would make Brie happy, no matter what happened between them. “It’s ironic that I’ll be working and carrying out Niki’s vision.”
“Brie may come out of it and she may not.” He looked at the clock and stood. “I’m out of time. Do you want to schedule another appointment?”
Collision Course Page 20
