[fan] diviners trilogy - complete series

by Nicolette Andrews

  The oracle held the bowl up to the heavens above. She spoke something in the Biski tongue. I did not understand the words, but I could gather the meaning. “Mother above, accept this sacrifice, and bless your children who give themselves unto your service. Bring life at the end of this longest night that we are not forever trapped in darkness.” There was more that I was not certain about. The faces watching us were conflicted, and a few glances were shared between neighbors and families.

  She turned to us, and one by one she wiped blood upon the brows of the initiates. It was a symbol she painted, the one that was on the wrist of each initiate. She spoke words with each one as she passed; then came my turn. She paused before putting the blood upon my brow.

  “The prophecy lives, daughter of my blood. Prepare yourself, for I will not always be with you.”

  The very idea filled me with fear. There is still so much I must learn. I had told my grandmother of Johai’s plot, and she agreed the time to leave was coming. She said not when but that I would know when the time had come. She brushed the blood upon my brow with the tips of her fingers. I felt the circles, three interlocking, each overlapping the other. I am a dreau and the last of the Diranel diviners. I will stop this war before it comes.

  She continued down the line, and I left my eyes downcast. I felt Johai’s eyes upon me. Even among a crowd, I could find him without trouble. He was watching me from behind the lines of du-toath. His eyes were a glimmer in the light of the bonfire. He smiled at me and inclined his head. I wanted to turn away but could not. I will come to you but on my own terms. I closed my eyes, and when I opened them again, he had disappeared among the crowd. Despite that, I could feel him out there waiting for me.

  When the last initiate had the symbol writ in blood upon their brow, my grandmother addressed us as one, “Welcome, children of the Mother, to her service.”

  The crowd shouted, stomped, and roared their approval. Music picked up, and the crowd broke apart to dance or to return to their own campfires to spend the longest night. The du-toath greeted the newest to their order, embracing them and sharing words of wisdom. Many swarmed me. They touched my cheeks and brushed thumbs against my tattoo. I heard the word ‘dreau’ from many lips. Elenna came to my rescue, speaking to the people on my behalf, and we were able to break away at last.

  “What were they saying?” I asked her.

  “Some want your blessing, others thank you for returning.”

  “What blessing can I give them? I will leave this place soon.” And never return. I cannot be their dreau. When I die, the line dies with me. There may never be another diviner. It was a sobering thought.

  “Perhaps you will. Life has many twists and turns that even a dreau cannot see.” I opened my mouth to protest. I had yet to tell Elenna of my plans. I was not sure how to explain my intentions. Before I could say anything, Elenna tugged me towards the dancing. “Come. It is traditional to dance on the longest night.”

  I dug in my heels. “No, I will not take a man into the woods.”

  Elenna stopped and laughed. “You do not have to dance the longest dance tonight. That has passed. Those who wish to couple in the dark may, but it is not expected of you.”

  I flushed, feeling foolish for assuming. The music was fast paced, and knowing it may be my last chance to dance, I let Elenna pull me into the throng of dancers. The music was more spirited than that of the longest dance. I spun and twirled and laughed. I found I had many different partners that night, and I was given wine to drink, and I felt myself lost in a haze of pleasure and happiness. My thoughts were abuzz when I spotted Johai once more. He was weaving through the crowd towards me. My impulse was to run, but I had to let him trust me. Better he think I was under his spell. If he believed me in love with him, he would not know I still intended to send the specter beyond the veil. I let my most recent partner go with a smile as Johai approached me. He stopped a fair distance from me, and I felt every inch between us.

  “Are you waiting for me?” he asked.

  “Yes,” I breathed.

  He slipped a hand around my waist and pulled me close to him. I could smell the musk that belonged to Johai along with the undertones of wood smoke and something more earthy that I could not place. “Your grandmother makes grand promises. She did not realize she cannot part us. The prophecy was only foretelling my rise, the dawning of a new age.”

  Then my grandmother is telling the people about the prophecy. She’s trying to warn the Biski not to go to war, I suspect.

  “Perhaps she does not know how powerful you are.” I brushed my hand across Johai’s shoulder. His muscle tensed beneath my touch.

  He laughed. “You have no idea.” He stroked my face, and I shivered. He leaned forward and kissed me, and the taste of his lips seared against me, and I had to fight a moan that bubbled up at the back of my throat. This is pretend. I do not desire him. I only need him to trust me. Then why did my body respond this way. I wrapped my arms around his neck and let our kiss deepen.

  When we broke apart, I was panting for breath.

  “We head north with the end of the gathering. I would have you come with me.”

  Yes. I knew the song I had to sing. I knew what sweet lies he would want to hear, but I feared losing myself in him. Johai was no fool. He would know if I lied to him, if I tried to play him false. What other options do I have? Our destinies were commingled. He felt the pull just as surely as I did. We must walk this path together.

  “I will come with you,” I said.

  He rubbed his thumb against my swollen lip where he had kissed me. “Good. I knew you would come in the end.” He let me go and turned to walk away. I hated myself for regretting the loss of his touch. He had gone a few strides when he turned back, and his appearance was altered somehow. I could not place it until I noticed his eyes had changed colors, from black to blue. For a brief moment I saw the man I loved, who was trapped inside this monster. “I am sorry about your grandmother,” he said before making his way back through the crowd. They parted for him as he passed, many watching him go.

  I was so dazzled by seeing a glimpse of the real Johai I nearly missed what he said. My grandmother! What has he done? I ran from the gathering, searching the bonfires for any sign of my grandmother. She was nowhere to be seen. Fear gripped me and replaced the haze I felt around Johai. I pushed my way through the crowd. When was the last time I had seen her? Where was she during the dancing? I had not seen her since the ceremony. People tried to stop me to talk, grabbing at my clothes and my hands. I felt like I was fighting against a current. I wished I had Beau with me to break the crowd, but he and the others from the Neaux camp were forbidden to attend the ceremony.

  Finally I broke free of the crowds and ran down the path that led back to my grandmother’s tent. The moon was full and ripe overhead. Pale light illuminated the ground. Up ahead, the grass had been bent over, and I saw a dark shape on the ground. My heart stopped, and I kneeled down beside the motionless figure of my grandmother. I touched her skin; it was warm. Her chest did not move, and try as I might, I could not find a pulse. Her violet eyes stared blankly at the night sky. My grandmother was dead.

  Chapter Ten

  I screamed. My heart was being ripped out of my chest. I took a step backwards and tripped, falling onto my rear. People swarmed me and my grandmother’s body. Concerned faces were peering at me as I babbled incoherent nonsense. I gestured towards my grandmother. I stared at her body. My stomach sank, and I thought I might vomit. Why her? Judging from the way her body was sprawled on the ground, this was no natural death. Who could have done this, and why? She was loved and revered. I may not have been able to explain in words what had happened, the scene lent its own explanation.

  A man with a black beard and crimson feathers tied in his hair grabbed me by the shoulders and hauled me to my feet. He shook me as he questioned me in a sharp tone. He spoke in the Biski language, and I could only stare back at him in response. Tears were slipping down my cheeks. I
had promised myself I would not cry, but I could not stop the tears from falling now. I felt numb. He killed her. Johai killed her.

  I shook my head in response. I couldn’t force my tongue to work.

  The man said something more in the Biski tongue. A second man joined him, and they had a quick discussion, which I ignored. I wanted to curl up in a ball. I wanted to scream, to punch something, anything to make the pain go away. We had known each other for such a short amount of time, but the pain of losing one of the last few members of my family hit me deeper than I thought it would. I brought this upon her. Johai knew I was learning from her, and he killed her for it.

  Someone pulled me to my feet once more. They dragged me from the chaos and the crowd. I was too numb to care. Everything I touch dies. How many more must die before this ends. Take me now, Goddess, if that will end this bloodshed. Whoever had a hold of me steered me towards the camp. People were rushing past us, going to see what the commotion was about. Perhaps they will blame me for her death. How do the Biski handle murder? Will they kill me for it? Will death ease this pain? I leaned against the strong hands that embraced me. Taking strength from someone else was easier than facing the pain. As I moved away from the scene, the reality began to hit me. I am the last diviner in truth. No one else can stop the specter but me. There was no choice left, not that there had ever been. How can I stop him without the training I need? That is why he killed her, to prevent me from learning the key to stopping him.

  Whoever had a hold of me led me to an encampment on the edge of Mother Lake. It was larger than any other camp and more ordered as well. I know this place, I thought dimly. It was a passing thought as I was shown inside a tent.

  “Sit down,” a voice said in my mother tongue. My head was in a fog, but hearing his voice brought me back to the present. Johai stood a few feet from me. His brow was furrowed, and his eyebrow slightly cocked. The expression reminded me of the old Johai, my Johai. He used to look at me like that when he did not know what to say. For a moment I could pretend things were back to the way they had been before. But despite what I thought I had seen before, I knew this Johai was not mine. This man had black eyes and a blacker heart. “What happened?” he asked.

  You killed my grandmother. “I was looking for my grandmother, and she—” I choked on the words. “She was lying there in the tall grasses.” I looked away. I could not face her attacker.

  “The oracle was fragile. It is a tragedy that she has left us before your training was complete.” His lips curled up at the corners.

  I saw his lips moving, but everything came out muffled. He’s feeding me lies, expecting me to gobble them whole. My thoughts focused to a razor’s edge. I have to make him trust me, but how can I trust him when he killed an old woman? Johai stopped talking and gave me a puzzled look. I considered striking him and fleeing. There has to be another way. I cannot stand being beside him like this, being reminded of the life that he stole to give himself a body.

  “What is it, Maea?” His tone was hushed, a warning not to do what I was considering.

  This isn’t the real Johai. He wouldn’t kill. I lowered my hand. I will give him his life back. I have to be patient.

  “Nothing, I am fine now, just a bit tired. I think I should head back.” I stood up to leave. He caught me by the wrist.

  I glared at him in challenge. Kill me and be done with it. Spare everyone of my curse and end my life, I shouted in my mind. I am powerless against you. Even then, in that moment, with his hand on my pulse I could feel it race. I was drawn to him, dangerously so. He had killed my grandmother to stop me from learning, and even now I couldn’t hate him, and I loathed myself for that.

  He touched the top of my head, and I glanced up at him through my lashes. “I think you should stay here tonight, just until everything settles down. Tomorrow I’ll take you to her tent to gather your things.” His tone was soothing, and for a second I thought I saw a glimpse of blue in his gaze, but that may have been wishful thinking on my part.

  I did not want to return to my grandmother’s tent alone. I had thought to go to the ambassador’s camp and sleep in Elenna’s tent as I had done before.

  “I don’t think I should,” my voice warbled. I looked away from Johai and wrapped my arms around my chest.

  “It’s late, and there’s a killer out there. I would feel better if you were close by.”

  I spun around to face him. The only killer here is you. I would be safer anywhere but here. My accusation was at the tip of my tongue, but I did not have the courage to say it.

  Had it been anyone other than him, it would have been a sensible suggestion, albeit with a loaded motive. I was trapped; I could not deny him. He thinks his spell has me in his thrall. If I deny him, he will know the truth. If I stayed here in this state, then I might lose all control of my senses and give in to him in truth.

  “Don’t worry. I won’t take advantage of you. I want you to come to me willingly and not because you are grieving.” It sounded just like the real Johai, and I crumbled. The decision was made before the question was ever asked.

  He held out his hand to me. I shrugged it off. He laughed. I looked around his tent. It was decent sized, perhaps double the size of Shewa’s. A sleeping mat had been rolled out as if awaiting someone to crawl into it. There was room enough for two, and I feared he would presume to share a sleeping roll. I cannot do this—I have to go. I turned to leave again and found Johai blocking the exit.

  “Do you need something?” he asked.

  My heart was hammering in my chest. Run! my subconscious screamed at me. I stepped away from the door and cast about my surroundings once more. He had a table with parchments rolled out across them, and I spied a few maps and a stack of books with worn spines. He walked over to the other side of the tent and removed a few extra blankets from a pile. He laid them out across the tent from where the sleeping roll lay.

  “You can sleep there. I’ll sleep over here, closer to the door.” He gestured towards the sleeping mat as he straightened out the blankets.

  I see so much of the real Johai in him. Is he really gone? I bit my lip and went to sit on the sleeping mat. He said he would not force me and that he wanted me to come to him on my own; then why trap me here with him? Because he knows how his presence affects you. He kept his back to me as he worked. The situation reminded me of our time in Sanore. Could it be that Johai lives inside him as the specter once lived inside Johai?

  “Sleep,” he commanded, seeing me staring. He shuffled about the tent, collecting parchments and books and stacking them next to his sleeping roll.

  “Why play these games? You could kill me whenever you wanted,” I asked.

  He did not pause his stacking to say, “I do not want you dead.”

  “Stop lying to me,” I hissed. “You like to make everyone dance to your tune, but in the end we both know it comes down to you or me.”

  “It doesn’t have to be that way.” He came over to stand over me.

  I tilted my head back and tried to read his expression. “Why are you doing this, pretending you care and taking care of me?”

  He kneeled down in front of me so we were eye to eye. I recoiled as he reached out to touch my face. He frowned and then placed his hands on his thighs. “You did not kill me. You’re the first to let me live. This is the longest I’ve had a body in centuries…” He paused and looked thoughtful. “And I was genuine when I told you you were meant for me. Your line was destined for me. That‘s why you feel a draw to me. You sensed it even before I had control. Why do you think you fell in love with Johai?”

  “You’re lying; I fell in love with Johai—not you.”

  He chuckled. “You are so naive.”

  I slapped him. He reeled back and nearly fell over. When he regained his balance, he touched his face where our skin had made contact. He looked at me with a fierce expression. I stared back at him. I might feel helpless, but I was not willing to give in.

  “I’m going to sleep now.
” I lay down with my back to him. My heart was hammering. That was foolish.

  Silence stretched for a few moments before he stood up and walked to the other side of the tent. I held my breath, waiting for a retaliation that did not come.

  “You may not know it yet, Maea, but I care for you deeply. If you let me, I could love you like he did. I saw you through his eyes while I was trapped inside of him. I know you as he did, and I have his body…” He let the words linger.

  I refused to answer the call his words seemed to stir up inside me. I would not succumb to his sweet words. They must be a spell, a way for him to trick me. I am stronger than this.

  He sighed. “I am going out for a while. Sleep well, Maea.”

  He slipped out of the tent. For several hours, I lay awake, wondering what would happen if I accepted his offer. Did I really fall in love with the specter inside him? I stared at the moving shadows outside the tent. Voices drifted through the night. Panic was sweeping through the Biski encampment as they realized the oracle was dead. I could never love someone who killed so callously. Someone shouted in the distance, and a low keening lament rolled through the encampments. I have to stay with him. I need to convince him to trust me so I can get to Keisan. I chanted my plans over and over to keep my grief at bay.

  Eventually sleep claimed me, and when it did, I dreamed. I ran down a hallway. I recognized the grand frescos and mosaics of Keisan. The niches held a myriad of vases and busts. As I had dreamed it before, the halls were empty. Where is it? I must find it. I ran my hands along the walls, looking for a chink or a gap, something to reveal a hidden door. That was it. I needed to find the passageway to the Sea Chamber; it was hidden here somewhere.