Secret Baby: A Second Chance Navy SEAL Romance (Forbidden First Times Book 4)

by Sofia T Summers

  At least, that’s what I kept telling myself. Working for the radio station wasn’t like working for a large corporation – we were more like a family than a business, and I knew that loyalty was rewarded. I fully intended to make the most of my career there, even if it was taking longer to get off the ground than I’d initially wanted. And even as just an administrative assistant, I wore a lot of hats.

  Things would turn out eventually. They had to. Even if I had to wait until Olive was a little older, I’d do everything I could to advance myself. Sometimes, it made me almost angry that my mom didn’t seem to make much of my job – after all, she’d been a stay at home mom for almost her entire life.

  Things are different now, I told myself as Emmy and Tom and I approached the radio station building. The sun was out and I was almost sweating under the loose sweater I wore. Bright rays from the sky made it hard to see, and I shielded my eyes with my hand.

  “Wow,” Emmy said. “Look at that.”

  I squinted into the distance and frowned.

  “What?” I asked.

  “That car,” she said. “It’s huge. You think it’s Donna’s?”

  Beside me, Tom laughed.

  “There’s no way she could afford that,” he said. “That’s a Land Rover Defender. They’re like, fifty grand, at least.”

  My heart lurched to the side and I felt my stomach do a flip that had nothing to do with the copious amount of cheesy garlic bread that I’d consumed over the last hour.

  Emmy and Tom kept walking towards the station, but I was frozen in my tracks.

  “Hey, Jessie, you coming?” Emmy asked. She frowned. “Are you okay? Don’t tell me you think you have food poisoning,” she added. “That’s the last thing I need right now.”

  I swallowed hard.

  “I’m fine,” I lied. “You guys go ahead.”

  Emmy and Tom gave me one last look, then nodded and kept walking. I stayed, rooted to the spot. My palms began to sweat and I had the strange, sudden urge to turn on my heel and run away.

  I couldn’t explain how I knew it was him, but I just did. It was like the universe was calling out to me, screaming at me that there was danger ahead.

  That now, Benjamin was back, and that this time, I wasn’t dreaming.

  When I saw him, I didn’t move from where I stood in the parking lot. He stared at me for a moment – his expression was hard to read from fifteen feet away – and I inhaled so deeply that I thought I would pass out right then and there.

  “Jessie?”

  I didn’t answer. Now that the shock was beginning to fade, I felt hot anger flooding my body. Powerful rage, the kind of feeling that made me want to run over to him and pound my chubby fists against his chest.

  But I couldn’t move.

  Benjamin started walking towards me, closing the gap between our bodies. I opened my mouth to speak, to yell, to scream at him, but no words came out.

  “Jessie, I need to talk to you,” Benjamin said in a deep, gravelly voice.

  And just like that, lust bloomed inside of me. It was infuriating – why the hell was I suddenly feeling so horny, when all I wanted to do was kill him? I should have been inches away from wringing his neck and yet, right now, all I could think about was how his lips had felt on mine: hot and fiery and passionate. All I could focus on was the delicious tingling in my clit and the way my pussy jolted at just the faintest hint of his woodsy cologne.

  Benjamin reached for my hands and took them in his own. His grip was strong and warm and sure and I had twin urges fighting inside of me – one urge to pummel him and scream, the other to throw my body against his and kiss him passionately. Just touching him was enough to send sparks flying through my entire body and I held my breath as he looked into my eyes with his intense sapphire stare.

  “Jessie, I still love you,” Benjamin said fiercely. “I never stopped loving you. Please, I need to talk to you. I need to explain.”

  The tension between us rose and white-hot electricity between our bodies sparked and crackled. I had never been more tempted in my life to crush my body against his and kiss him, not even the night when we had first met, all those years ago. I could feel myself start to shake and quiver with nervous, horny energy as Benjamin stared intently into my eyes. His muscular frame was all I could focus on, his strong jaw and his chiseled face were etched onto my heart forever.

  “Please,” Benjamin repeated. “Please, I need to talk to you I have to tell you why I left.”

  I swallowed hard. There was nothing I could do. I couldn’t give into the reckless, pulsing lust that flowed through my veins like hot lava.

  Too much time had passed – too many things had changed. My heart was pounding so hard that I worried I would go into cardiac arrest and if Benjamin kept holding me, kept stroking the backs of my hands with his thumbs, I knew I would.

  It took all of the strength that I had in me, but I wrenched my hands free and raced away into the safety of the radio station leaving Benjamin – and our torrid past – behind.

  10

  Benjamin – Five Years Ago

  “At ease, Ensign.”

  I swallowed – hard – and then relaxed my posture. Today had already been so strange. If someone had told me that things were about to get even weirder, I would have merely raised an eyebrow at them.

  “You asked to see me, sir,” I said in a low voice.

  My CO, Admiral Winthrop, sat behind a large and imposing desk made of dark walnut. It looked as if it weighed more than three hundred pounds, and it was so large that it easily could have accommodated at least two people. Admiral Winthrop’s office was dark. Wooden blinds were pulled tight against the hot North Carolina sun and a few austere framed prints hung on the wall.

  My CO himself was no less intimidating. His close-cropped hair was greying and his skin was deeply lined and tanned from years of hard work in the sun. His eyes were such a light shade of blue that looking at him, I felt like I was staring down a great white shark.

  “I did,” Admiral Winthrop said. A man of few words, he was one of the most respected men on base. When he spoke, no one failed to listen. Working for him had proven difficult, but I took pride in my placement. Admiral Winthrop wasn’t the kind of man who would steer his direct reports into trouble. He was stern but fair, and I admired him tremendously.

  I cleared my throat. “What can I do for you, sir?”

  “Sit, please,” Admiral Winthrop replied. He gestured to the chair on the other side of his massive desk and I sat, leaning forward with my back straight as a ramrod.

  “Ensign Grove, it’s come to my attention that you’ve made an example of yourself,” the admiral began. He steepled his fingers together on the varnished surface of his desk, then looked up at me and raised an eyebrow.

  I frowned. “I’m not sure what you mean, sir.”

  “Did you know that fewer than one percent of all men who enter the Navy SEAL selection and training program make it?”

  “Yes, sir,” I replied.

  “And that you made it through Basic Underwater Demolition and SEAL qualification training with the highest scores,” the admiral continued.

  I could feel my jaw clench and I swallowed again. From his tone, I wasn’t sure if he was asking a rhetorical question or merely trying to get me to speak up.

  “Yes, sir,” I said finally. “I did.”

  The admiral took his hands off his desk and gave me a strange look.

  “I have an assignment for you, Ensign Grove,” Admiral Winthrop said.

  I nodded. I’d been expecting as much – it had only been a few weeks since I’d returned from Coronado, California where the training and qualification programs had taken me. Training had been hellish. The only thing that had gotten me through was Jessie. Compared to the basic training and OCS I’d finished after graduating from Seaside University had been child’s play compared to SEAL training – it was hard to believe that I’d go through anything more difficult in the course of my entire life
span.

  “I look forward to it, sir,” I said.

  “Ensign, are you married?”

  I blinked at Admiral Winthrop. “No, sir,” I said. “Not yet – my girlfriend and I, we have plans to marry shortly.”

  To my surprise, the admiral frowned.

  “You should get married,” he said gruffly. “It’s always best to have a wife supporting you.”

  I nodded.

  “And your assignment will take you away for quite a while,” the admiral continued. “It’s important to make sure that you have someone waiting.”

  “Sir, my girlfriend is the one who encouraged me in the first place,” I said, feeling awkward, almost like I was oversharing. “She’ll be happy. I’m sure of it.”

  Admiral Winthrop cleared his throat. “Your assignment,” he said gruffly. “Will be difficult. You’ll receive more details later, but I must stress the importance of keeping this matter secret.”

  I nodded. Back in training, I’d heard stories from our instructors about their first assignments. One man had recounted the stress of piloting a rescue helicopter mission in a hurricane. The story itself had been harrowing, but I wasn’t frightened.

  “Sir, I’m confident that I’ve received the best training,” I said. Saying it aloud almost made me feel like I was bragging, but I wasn’t – I’d never been comfortable boasting about myself and my abilities. Rather, it was important for me to make the admiral feel comfortable about giving me an assignment so early on.

  “You may be gone as long as a year,” Admiral Winthrop said.

  Immediately, I thought of Jessie.

  “I see, sir,” I said. “When am I to report?”

  The admiral cleared his throat. “Day after tomorrow,” he said gruffly. “You’ll receive details about your deployment within the next twenty-four hours.”

  A small flash of doubt – the first I’d felt since I had been approached to become a SEAL – flared in my mind. A year was a long time, especially for Jessie – sometimes, she was so impatient that she could hardly get through the day without calling or texting me because she missed me so much.

  How was she going to cope with this?

  My stomach churned. I tried to remind myself that if it wasn’t for Jessie, I wouldn’t be here at all – hell, I might not even be in the Navy. She had always been so supportive, so encouraging of my dreams.

  And she had to have known this was a possibility. Being a SEAL wasn’t like any other job on earth. Jessie had told me time and time again that she loved me, that she was proud of me, that she wanted to be with me no matter what.

  But would she be able to get through an entire year without me?

  “Ensign?”

  The admiral’s voice brought me crashing back down to the ground and I looked up at him.

  “I won’t let you down, sir,” I said finally. “I promise you that.”

  Admiral Winthrop nodded. “I know,” he said. “That’s why you’ve been selected for this assignment.”

  There wasn’t anything else to say – I knew that I wouldn’t get to ask many questions, especially not before I’d been given the specifics of my assignment. Admiral Winthrop dismissed me and I walked out of his office into the hallway with my head in the clouds once again. All I could think about was Jessie and how the hell I was going to explain this to her. I couldn’t give her any specific details, and I knew that would make her really steamed.

  But it wasn’t like I had a choice. I’d been given orders, and now I had to follow them.

  No matter what.

  I just wished I could be honest with Jessie and tell her the truth, find a way to make her understand that this was my duty.

  Thoughts of her stayed with me all day. By the time I drove off the base and made my way to Jessie’s apartment, I was so conflicted that my head ached. Knowing that I wouldn’t have long with my girlfriend before having to leave made me feel almost sick, and I wished that we’d gone to Vegas and gotten married after all. If Jessie were my wife, I would have been able to tell her a little more.

  As it stood now, the only thing I could really tell her was that I was leaving soon ... and that no matter what, I’d promise to return to her. In the end, everything had to be okay. We’d been through so much together that eventually, we’d be able to look back at this and be grateful that it had only been one year instead of several.

  Things have to be okay, I told myself. I’d never do anything to hurt Jess ... and she knows that.

  But no matter how many times I tried to reassure myself, I couldn’t get rid of the ominous sinking feeling in my gut. Jessie might be hurt initially, but she was tough. She’d be okay.

  She’d have to be okay – because without her, there was no way I would have had the strength to do any of this.

  By the time I got to Jessie’s apartment, the sun was sinking low in the sky. I grabbed the grease-spotted paper bag of takeout and carried it inside. Jessie was in the living room, lying on the couch in an oversized t-shirt and peering at a magazine. When she saw me, she grinned and got to her feet, then squealed before launching herself in my direction.

  “Baby, you brought dinner?” Jessie asked. She gave me a quick, steamy kiss and took the bag from my hands. Peering inside with excitement, she squealed again.

  “Chinese!” Jessie cried. “How did you know I was craving that?”

  I shrugged. “Lucky guess,” I said.

  Jessie took the bag from me and set it down, then put her hands on the sides of my face and pulled me into a deep kiss. Her tongue flickered into my mouth and she gently nibbled my lower lip, sending a hot flash of lust through my body.

  “I missed you,” Jessie purred into my mouth. She took my hands and put them on her curves and I groaned – the t-shirt she wore was so thin and flimsy that she was practically naked in my arms. I slid my hands down her body and squeezed the delectable, full cheeks of her ass. Standing there, with Jessie practically molded to my body, I felt the powerful urge to never let go of her. Being with her like this was so perfect, so wonderful.

  How the fuck was I going to give it up for a year?

  “Mmn,” Jessie moaned softly as I pulled the hem of her t-shirt up and squeezed her ass again. She pulled away and I nearly groaned with frustration.

  Jessie winked at me. “I know,” she said coyly. “I know you want me. But we’ve got to have dinner first, don’t we?” She winked, then pranced into the kitchen and came back with knives, forks, and two plates. Jessie gave me a saucy look, then made an exaggerated show of being over and setting the plates down on her coffee table. Her shirt rose higher and I saw her deliciously round ass barely squeezed into a pair of cotton panties. Lust rose in me like a tidal wave and it took every single ounce of my willpower not to push her over and plunge my cock inside of her heavenly pussy.

  “You’re such a tease,” I groaned. “You’re killing me, you know that?”

  Jessie turned to me and licked her lips. She raised an eyebrow at me and ran her hands down her body, cupping her own breasts and rolling her eyes back in her head at the obvious pleasure of it. Her pink nipples were stiff as pebbles under that thin shirt and she moaned softly as she moved her hands lower and began toying with the hem of her shirt.

  Before I’d met Jessie, I honestly wondered how some couples stayed together for years. I’d always been such a loner that the idea of sharing my life with someone was wholly unappealing. I’d imagined that couples got bored with each other after a spell, and the thought of breaking up with someone just because they were too familiar was shameful.

  Now, though, I knew that I could spend the rest of my life with Jessie and love every single goddamned second. She was so sexy, so fierce, so fun that I was never bored.

  “You are driving me insane,” I growled, reaching for Jessie in an attempt to pull her close. She giggled and leapt just out of reach, then squared her shoulders and put her massive tits on full display through her thin shirt.

  “I know,” Jessie simpered.
“And you’re loving every second of it.” She eyed me, then crossed her arms over her stomach and pulled her shirt up, inch by tantalizing inch. As she exposed her pale, soft curves to me, my cock began to stiffen and throb in my pants.

  “Dinner’s more interesting this way, what do you think?” Jessie teased as she pulled her shirt over her head and threw it to the side. Clad only in her flimsy cotton panties, she looked abominably desirable and I wanted her desperately. All thoughts of my stressful day had vanished and now, the only thing I could think about was Jessie’s sweet, juicy pussy and how quickly I could bury my raging hard-on inside of her.

  I swallowed drily.

  Jessie sat down and crossed her legs, still giving me that coy smile. She made a show of spreading her thighs, showing the crotch of her panties darkened unmistakably by her arousal. The sweet, musky scent of her pussy filled the room and I nearly groaned as I lowered myself to the floor.

  Jessie reached into the brown paper bag and pulled out an eggroll. She opened her mouth and licked her lips before closing her eyes and sensually taking a bite.

  “Mmmn,” Jessie moaned. “This is so good,” she purred, opening her eyes and batting her lashes at me.

  It was ridiculous – if anyone else had tried a little stunt like this with me, I would have found it repulsive. But Jessie was so adorably sexy, so cute and perfect, that it just seemed like another one of her antics that had made me fall so deep in love with her.

  “I can’t believe you’re seducing me over Chinese food,” I muttered under my breath. Blood rose to the surface of my cheeks and I had to shift my position because of my raging erection.

  “Baby, just watch,” Jessie teased. She grinned at me. “You’re loving it. I can tell.”

  The thing was, I was loving it. I was loving it so much that I was already beginning to question following the orders I’d been given.