Best Laid Plans

by Farlow, LK

  Yet, somehow, I find myself sympathizing for her, which pisses me off. I turn my head from her, causing her hand to fall away. She gets my message loud and clear and steps back. Nate guides her down into a chair, repeating the motions with his mother.

  Together, we sit in my office, me on one side, the Reynolds clan on the other. This feels like the meeting from hell, with sides clearly drawn—it’s me against them.

  The patriarch of their family goes to speak again, but his wife quiets him. “Luke, I think it’s safe to say there’s a lot more going on here than we know.”

  Mr. Reynolds disagrees. “I know all I need to know.”

  “You really don’t, Dad. You know what you overheard, which isn’t much.”

  Her dad pins her with a glare so icy it could sink the Titanic. “Then start talking, little girl.”

  * * *

  Natalie

  Oh. Jesus. I’ve never in my life regretted keeping this secret more than I do in this moment. Talk about a colossal fuck-up on my part. “If you’re going to be mad at anyone, be mad at me.”

  My dad glares. “Oh, I am.” My mom lays her hand on his, and he simmers down.

  “When Alden and I…when we…” I struggle to find the right words, finally settling on, “That night, I came onto Alden. I’d had the biggest crush on him for as long as I could remember, and I finally decided to act on it—that it was now or never.

  “He…he seemed into me, and one thing led to another.” A quick look around the room tells me this is as awkward for everyone else as it is for me. “I didn’t realize how much Alden had drunk that night, and the next morning, he didn’t even remember anything happened between us.

  “It stung, but I figured no harm, no foul. And then…”

  “And then you found out you were pregnant,” Mom supplies.

  I nod, feeling microscopically small.

  “I really thought I was doing the right thing. I see now that I was wrong and incredibly misguided. I was scared Alden would get in trouble, among other things.”

  Alden speaks up. “What other things?” I shake my head, not wanting to answer. “No, c’mon, Natalie. Cards on the table: what other things?”

  “Things like Mia,” I whisper.

  At her name, Alden’s gaze turns hard and dark. “Mia. Got it.”

  He seems angry about this, which baffles me. “You guys had started dating and I didn’t want to come between y’all.”

  He lets out a low, humorless laugh. “Thanks, Nat. So much. Really appreciate it.”

  I’m not sure where this particular brand of hostility is coming from, and I don’t appreciate it. “How many times do I have to say sorry? I know I was wrong, and I have apologized countless times—and yes, I know sorry doesn’t make it all better! But, I refuse to be your emotional punching bag. You may not remember that night, but you were a willing participant like it or not. Not to mention, the age I am now, is basically how old you were then! I messed up. I’m owning it and trying like hell to make it right. Either accept my apology or don’t, the choice is yours. But this shit? It’s not going to happen.”

  My words shut him up. They shut everyone up.

  Mom is the first to break the silence. “Obviously y’all have a lot to talk about. Nat, why don’t you walk your father and I out?”

  “Yeah, sure.”

  The three of us stand and exit the office. I can feel the eyes of seemingly everyone on me, and it makes me squirm. I’m a fairly private person, and now every employee on shift and patron knows my business. How mortifying.

  I walk my parents all the way to their vehicle. The air around us is thick and tense.

  My mom steps to me and wraps me in her arms, pressing a kiss to my temple. “It will be okay. Everyone makes mistakes, kiddo, but I have to say, you may have taken the cake.” Leave it to mom to attempt to joke at a time like this.

  She squeezes me one last time and gets into the car. Leaving just me and my dad. My very angry, surly dad. “I’m disappointed in you, Nat Bug. Real disappointed.” He turns and gets into the driver’s seat, not even looking at me, much less giving me a hug.

  Guilt and sorrow churn in my gut as I head back into the café. I was prepared for today to be hard, but my family’s presence only served to further complicate our already difficult situation.

  As I approach the office, still-raised voices greet my ears.

  Great.

  I linger, not wanting to interrupt. I’m in the process of turning to walk away when my brother’s voice stops me in my tracks. “Here’s the thing, Alden. Even if you were hammered, you wouldn’t have made a play for my sister unless you were already thinking of her like that when you were sober. I know you, brother, and that’s just who you are.”

  It wasn’t my intention to eavesdrop, yet here I am, waiting. In all honesty, I feel like a dog with a treat on her nose, waiting to be told to “Get it!” Only, Alden’s reply is my it and I’m downright salivating for it.

  “You really are like a brother to me, so I’m gonna shoot straight here and not give you any bullshit. Yes, your sister caught my eye on more than one occasion. I can’t pinpoint the exact moment my feelings for her changed—I just know that one day she went from honorary sister to something more. I swear though, I never knowingly acted on it. Age difference aside, I’d never betray you like that.”

  I suck in a sharp breath at Alden’s confession. He had feelings for me?

  23

  Alden

  I feel it’s on me to be honest with Nate about being into his sister back then. But vague is the way to go. He doesn’t need to know the extent of my— mostly former—infatuation.

  He doesn’t need to know that when she turned sixteen and sprouted breasts that I could hardly tear my eyes away, as sick as that is. And he absolutely doesn’t need to know that every time I…took matters into my own hands…it was her fantasized about.

  Nope. No way in fucking well. I’m keeping that shit under lock and key. Hell, maybe in a fireproof safe.

  “I know you wouldn’t,” Nate says, lifting a boulder off of my shoulders. Legit, I feel a hundred pounds lighter.

  A knock sounds from the other side of my office door. Nate quickly stands. Awkwardly, I extend my hand toward him. But instead of a handshake, he pulls me in for a bro-hug. “I’m gonna get out of here and let you and Nat talk.”

  “Sounds good.” He walks over to the door, but I stop him before he can pull it open and leave. “Hey, Nate, thanks.”

  He opens the door and leaves, and his sister enters the room, taking the seat he just vacated. “That was…a lot,” she murmurs, breaking the ice.

  I stare at her, seated across from me, looking frazzled and puffy-eyed, but still so fucking beautiful. The fury I want so desperately to cling to begins to slip away. I’m not sure that I’m actually ready to let it go, but I can see the pain and regret so clearly in her glassy eyes.

  “One way of putting it.” I drop back down into my chair. “I want to get to know Tatum.”

  “Yes! Yes, of course. I really, truly would never stand in the way of that.” She pauses, wiping her palms across her shapely, denim-clad thighs. “And I want you to know, I don’t expect anything from you. Between us or monetarily. The only thing Tatum needs from you is your time—time I have already unfairly taken from y’all.”

  The remorse in her voice is so strong that I physically feel it, and it makes me ache. “I’m gonna be real with you, Nat. I’m not as mad as I was. But, I can’t say I’m ready to forgive and forget. It’s going to take time, but I will never let the shit between us bleed over into my relationship with Tatum.”

  She gives me a sad smile. “That’s all I can ask for.”

  “Let’s hammer out a schedule then.”

  Natalie digs her phone out of her purse, and I run my index finger over the touchpad on my laptop, waking it from its sleep. I key in my password and open my calendar.

  “W-would it be okay for the first visit or to two for me to tag
along?”

  My first instinct is to tell her to fuck off, but I refrain. I imagine this has to be hard for her—even if it is of her own doing. “Sure.”

  “Really?” She sighs, and I watch her posture visibly loosen. “Thank you so much. Maybe we…we could make you dinner?”

  I don’t particularly want to go to her house, but I agree to because I know it is where Tatum will be the most comfortable. I offer the same one-word answer as before, but she smiles like I just told her she’s won the lottery.

  “Thank-you-thank-you-thank-you!” She leaps from her chair and moves around the desk, wrapping me in a hug. Her nearness feels better than I’ll ever admit out loud; it feels like carbonation bubbles bursting against my tongue after that first sip of Coke.

  I gently move her back from me. I can’t think for shit when she’s that close. It’s like my body and my brain go to war, and her little body and her warm skin on mine feel so good that my brain waves the white flag of defeat within seconds.

  Fuck that noise.

  She looks a little hurt at the distance I’ve forced, but she’ll get over it. “How about dinner tomorrow?”

  She returns to her seat and nibbles her lip. “I have one of my classes.”

  “That’s not a problem for me. I’ll keep an eye on Tatum while you do your class. Maybe Tatum and I can cook for you.” As soon as the idea forms in my mind, I like it. “Really, it’s the most favorable option, Natalie. I get time with her, but we’re under the same roof. It’s a win-win.”

  “Yeah. You’re right. But listen, we need to handle telling her who you really are delicately.”

  I fight the urge to roll my eyes. I may be new to the whole parenting thing, but I’m not an idiot. “I agree. I’ll spend time with her first and let her get to me, and when it feels right, we will tell her together.”

  “Yeah, okay.” She stands, grabbing her bag. “I’ll see you tomorrow. My class starts at six, so maybe a little before?”

  “I’ll be there.”

  “Oh, and Alden.” I glance up to find her fishing something out of her bag. It looks like a…scrapbook? “I-I brought this for you. It’s a book of all of Tatum’s firsts. I know it’s not the same as being there, but hopefully it’ll help a little.” She places it on the edge of my desk and walks away, closing the door behind her.

  I pull the memory book toward me, with great caution, like it’s a coiled snake, ready to strike and inject me with deadly venom at any time. Flipping it open, I’m immediately met with a picture of Tatum as a newborn laying on Nat’s chest. I’m awestruck by how similar we looked as babies; if anything, it reaffirms what I already know in my heart to be true—she is mine.

  I flip through the pages, one by one, soaking up every entry. I have to give Natalie credit, she truly kept up with every single first. Even a few I could have went without—first diaper blow-out? No thanks.

  24

  Natalie

  I’ve spent the entire day cleaning like a maniac. The carpet is the cleanest it’s ever been, the countertops are spotless and the tile is sparkling, yet I keep scrubbing. I’m on my hands and knees in the kitchen making sure the oven is in tiptop shape in case they bake anything when Tatum walks in and says my name. I turn to look at her banging the top of my head on the stove.

  “Ouch! Shit!”

  “Dat’s a no-no word, Mama.” She shakes her head back and forth at me as if I’ve severely let her down with my foul mouth. “Nana says its un…unbetumming.”

  I stifle a laugh—she’s so precious it hurts. “Unbecoming? That’s an awfully big word, Tater Tot.”

  She beams. “I smart.”

  “Very much so.

  “What’s you doing?” she asks, scrunching up her nose.

  “Cleaning.”

  “Why?”

  “Alden is coming over.” Before I can get another word out of my mouth, my girl is full-on happy dancing. I’m talking head-bobbing, booty-shaking, foot-stomping, hand-clapping dancing.

  “You excited?”

  “Yes!” she squeals, throwing her tiny arms around me, knocking me onto my ass and my head into the stove for a second time. “I’m so ‘cited! I gotta get dressed, Mama! Like a pwincess!”

  She takes off toward her room, and I push myself back up onto my knees. I give the oven one last appraisal—it looks almost new, despite its years of use. Gripping the lip of the counter, I pull myself to standing and check the time. “Oh my God! It’s already five!”

  I haul ass down the hall, pausing outside of Tatum’s door. “Mama’s getting in the shower. I’ll leave the door open!”

  I turn the knob, shuck off my clothes, and hop in before the water even has a chance to get warm. “Cold, cold!” I squeak, but I power through. By the time the water runs warm, I’m finishing up and hopping out.

  I forego a towel entirely, drip-drying as I make a mad dash to my closet. I toss on my undergarments, shimmy into a pair of leggings, and pull a tank over my head. I toss my wet hair up into a bun and rush back to check on Tatum.

  Unlike me, she is a picture of pure perfection, decked out in a lemon-colored flippy tulle skirt, a pastel pink cap sleeve top with a silver glitter heart on the front, and a pair of purple high-top Converse.

  “Fix my hair, Mama?”

  I check the time on my phone. Five-forty. “Sure baby.” I follow her into her room and take a seat on her bed, where she already has her brush and hair elastics waiting. She stands between my knees as I brush her hair, smoothing it away from her face. I do a pretty waterfall braid and then secure the ends into a side pony.

  “You done?”

  “I am. Go look.”

  She rushes over to the mirror and squeals at her reflection. “Thanks, Mama! It’s perfect!”

  I put her brush and extra elastics in her top drawer and drop a kiss to her forehead. “Glad you like it, baby.”

  We both freeze when the sound of the doorbell echoes through the apartment. Tatum recovers before I do, making a break for the door. I trail after, more apprehensive than excited. But, I know this is the first step in mending all that I broke.

  I gently scoot my girl out of the way and open the door. The sight of Alden damn near takes my breath away. He’s dressed in a pair of navy cargo shorts and a weathered gray graphic tee that reads, You are what you eat. Nothing special, but my God, it’s mouthwatering all the same.

  “Hey,” he says casually.

  “Hi.”

  “Alden!”

  “Hey there, Princess. I’ve got something for you. If your mama ever asks me in I’ll give it to you.”

  If the floor could swallow me up right about now, that’d be great. I open the door wider and gesture for him to enter. Tatum wastes no time leaping into his arms, knocking the reusable shopping bag he’s holding from his grip. “Alden! I missed you!”

  I see some unidentifiable emotion pass over his face, but it’s gone in the blink of an eye. I pick up the bag as he hugs her closer and twirls her around. “I missed you too, pretty girl! You ready to see what I brought you?”

  He sets her down and she’s almost vibrating from excitement. It kills me to know that this could have been the norm for her. “Yessssss!”

  He kneels down and reached into his pocket, retrieving a small organza drawstring bag. He tugs it open and spills the contents into his palm and presents it to Tatum.

  Tears threaten when I see what he’s presenting her. In the center of his hand sits a rose gold charm bracelet with one single, solitary charm attached. Upon closer inspection, I notice it is a princess crown. Jesus, this man.

  Tatum looks from the bracelet to him with awe in her eyes. “Dat’s for me?”

  “It is,” he tells her, smiling at her reaction.

  Just like earlier in the kitchen with me, she launches herself at him. Unlike me, he keeps his footing and hugs her close. After a small eternity, she pulls away and holds out her wrist like the little diva she is. Alden fastens the bracelet, his sturdy fingers fumbling a littl
e with the lobster clasp. Once it is secured, she turns her wrist this way and that, admiring her new pretty.

  “What do we say, Tater Tot?”

  “Thank you! I loves it so much!” She hugs her wrist to her chest and bats her long lashes up at him. And just like that, I know he, too, is under her spell.

  I check the time again and realize if I don’t get moving, I’m going to be late for my class. “Well, uh. I would offer you a tour but, I gotta log on…”

  Alden shoos me away. “You’re fine. Go. Tatum and I have things on lock, don’t we?”

  “On. Wock. Mama!”

  “Okay. I’ll be in my room if you need me.”

  “I won’t. I haves Alden!” My heart rattles and I nod, turning to head down the hall.

  25

  Alden

  Tatum’s words echo through my mind, rocking my world on its axis. I won’t. I haves Alden. Already she trusts me to have her best interests at heart. Damn. I could tell from the guilt-stricken look Natalie desperately tried to hide, Tatum’s words affected her too.

  Tatum, though? Not so much. That kid is business as usual. “Wanna see my room?”

  “Sure, I’d love to.” She wraps her small hand around my pointer finger and pulls me behind her down the hall. Her door is the first on the right. She pushes it open, and the first thing I notice is that it looks like a rainbow exploded inside her room. Her walls and carpet are the only neutrals in the entire space. Her curtains are purple and blue, her rug is a rainbow shag, her bedding is pink and orange polka dots, and she has throw pillows in every color in the Crayola box. It’s a lot to take in, but it screams Tatum.

  “Whoa, Tater Tot. This room’s amazing!”

  She darts past me and climbs up onto her bed where she starts bouncing. “You likes it?”