Z-Burbia: A Zombie Novel

by Bible, Jake

  “So when do we go find him?” she asks.

  “Uh…”

  “Jace isn’t going anywhere,” Stella says. “He just got back and look at him. His leg is in bad shape and he has to keep his cheek clean or it will get infected.”

  “Oh, I’m sorry,” Melissa laughs. “Is that scratch an inconvenience for you, Jace? What a man you must feel like. Your wife telling you what you can and can’t do. She probably makes you piss sitting down, huh?”

  “Too far,” I say. “Never insult a man’s pissing style.” Melissa doesn’t laugh. Stella just groans.

  “Melissa, I know you are scared and hurt right now,” Stella says. “I understand that. Until Jace showed up at the gate, I didn’t know if he’d ever come back. So I know how you are feeling.”

  “You don’t know shit, Stella,” Melissa snaps. “You have your man back. Mine’s still out there.”

  “And he’ll make it back,” Stella says. “I’m sure of it.”

  Melissa cocks her head and studies Stella. I have a sinking feeling she’s gonna haul off and punch my wife, so I get right in front of her, ready to take the hit myself.

  “He took off to save me,” I say. I swallow hard, knowing what I’m about to say is gonna bring a shit storm down on me like never before. “You get a team together and I’ll go out with you.”

  “Like fuck you will!” Stella shouts, grabbing my arm and turning me about. “Are you fucking crazy, Jace? You just got back. Barely.” She points up to the landing. “And you want to leave? When you brought that crazy cannibal twat into my house? You fucking piece of shit.”

  I look up at the landing and freeze. Shit. Stella sees the look on my face and turns her head to look also. Elsbeth.

  “I ain’t crazy,” Elsbeth says, looking down on us from the landing. “I ain’t. Pa always said I just have different wiring in my head.” She taps her temple over and over. “Different. But not crazy.” The tapping starts to get rougher and rougher until she is smacking the side of her head. “Different! Different! Different!”

  “Jesus,” Greta says and smacks Elsbeth in the back of the head, “knock it off.”

  We three adults just stand and stare at this thirteen year old girl taking on this obviously disturbed young woman.

  “What?” Greta asks. “She was losing it. You want her to crack her skull?”

  Elsbeth looks at Greta and smiles. “Pa used to have to smack me. Thank you, little girl.”

  “Greta,” my daughter answers. “I already told you that. Don’t be stupid. Or crazy. Different is fine. Just no more crazy, got it?”

  “Yes, Greta,” Elsbeth nods. “Got it.” She gives a thumbs up and Greta just rolls her eyes before she turns and goes into her bedroom, slamming the door behind her.

  “Can I come out?” Charlie calls.

  “No,” Stella and I say.

  “I’ll go,” Elsbeth says. “I can track your man, lady.”

  Melissa looks at us and then back up at Elsbeth. A million emotions and responses filter across her face until she says, “Can you shoot a bow?”

  “Don’t need to,” Elsbeth smiles and lifts The Bitch up for Melissa to see. I don’t even remember her bringing that into the house. How did I not notice that?

  “Where the hell did she get that?” Stella asks. “It looks like yours, Jace.”

  “It’s better,” Elsbeth grins. “I can use this and these.” She taps her eyes, ears, then nose and her grin widens. “Ain’t no one got away from me. Not ever. Pa says that’s part of what makes me different. I don’t lose prey.”

  Holy shit, I think I brought home some cannibal savant or something. Rain Man with a taste for people. Great?

  “Is she for real?” Melissa asks.

  “She killed about fifty Zs by herself getting me from that truck,” I say. “That’s pretty fucking real in my book.”

  “Then we leave in the morning,” Melissa says. “I’ll pick the ones from my team I can trust 100%. We do this and Brenda is going to have a shit fit. She may not let us back in.”

  “Are you kidding?” Stella says. “You have got to be kidding! Jace? Don’t even think about it!”

  “If Jace was lost out there and you were standing in my living room with me and Jon looking at you, what would you want, Stella? Be honest. What would you want? For us just to sit on our asses and hope?”

  Stella starts to answer then closes her mouth. “I don’t like this.”

  “No one does,” Melissa nods. “But I have to go get Jon. There is no point in any of this for me without that man.” She glances up at Elsbeth and then at me. “Are you in?”

  “I am,” I say, looking at Stella. “I have to.”

  “Your leg is shit,” Stella says. “How are you going to run? If the Zs swarm they’ll take you down.”

  “I’ll watch him, lady,” Elsbeth says. “He won’t fall behind. And if we get trapped and I can’t kill our way gone, then I’ll put a blade through the back of his neck and then through my heart so we don’t get ate and turned.” Elsbeth is smiling as she says this last part like it’s a wonderful plan.

  “Oh, sweet Jesus,” Stella says. “This is all shit.”

  Our phones chime as a text comes in. We all pull them out and frown, then Stella and I look at Melissa. Her face is white, but her eyes blaze.

  The text is from Mindy and says, “We need all security and defensive personnel to the gate now! We have a situation! And someone go get Jason Stanford! This is his fault! Oh, and no one tell Melissa Billings. She doesn’t want to see this.”

  “Fucking dumb bitch sent it to the whole neighborhood,” Stella says. “That stupid cow.”

  “It’s Jon,” Melissa says. “He’s back.”

  The way she says it chills my bones. She is assuming the worst. And I can’t blame her.

  “We better get down there,” I say. “Are you staying here?”

  Stella shakes her head. “I’m coming with you. The kids will stay.”

  “What about…?” I nod up at Elsbeth.

  “She comes. I’m not leaving her with the kids alone.”

  “I won’t eat ‘em,” Elsbeth says. “I don’t eat friends.” She turns to the stairs and her words become muffled. “Never had friends. Good rule. Don’t eat friends. Rules is good.”

  “Jesus,” Stella says, shaking her head. “Weapons?”

  “Bows,” I say. “I’ll have to take Charlie’s until I get a new one.”

  “He’s dead,” Melissa says quietly as we walk to the garage for the bows.

  “Maybe not,” Stella replies as I push up the garage door. “It may not be that bad.”

  “It may be worse,” Elsbeth says. “He could be turned.”

  “Fucking A!” Stella snarls. “Just stay quiet, okay? No more talking unless I say so.”

  Elsbeth nods, her eyes wide with fear. Yep, my wife can scare the shit out of a cannibal savant.

  It takes us longer than it should because of my leg and we have to push our way through the crowd at the gate to get to the watchtower. The whole neighborhood has turned out thanks to Mindy’s incompetence. I look around, but don’t see Brenda anywhere.

  “This is quite ridiculous,” a voice blares from the other side of the gate. My belly clenches at the sound. “All I need to do is speak to your leader. A Brenda Kelly, I believe. A simple request that should not be taking so long!”

  I know who is at the other end of that voice before I get up into the watchtower. Stella, Elsbeth, and Melissa are right behind me.

  “Who told her?” Mindy snaps as she sees Melissa. “I said not to tell her.”

  “You sent a blast text to the whole neighborhood,” Stella says. “You moron.”

  “I did?” Mindy asks, pulling out her phone and looking at the text. “It wasn’t supposed to be.” She taps at the screen a couple times. In a second, every phone in the crowd chimes. So does one outside the gate. “Oh, poop.”

  I push Mindy out of the way and look down into the road. Bullhorn. O
r Wall Street.

  “See,” I say to Stella, “he has a bullhorn. That’s why I think Bullhorn is a better name.”

  “Shut up,” Stella says.

  The man is looking at his phone and shaking his head, laughing. Surrounding him are at least twenty heavily armed men and women. And kneeling in front, his hands and feet bound, and quite a few wraps of duct tape around his mouth, is Jon.

  “JON!” Melissa shouts.

  “Oh, you must be Missus Smart Ass,” Bullhorn says. “Your husband has quite a mouth. I had to close it for him.”

  The bullhorn comes down and slams into the back of Jon’s head. He crumples to the asphalt, but a woman reaches down and yanks him back up onto his knees.

  “Now, where is Ms. Brenda Kelly?”

  “Here, here,” Brenda says as she steps from the ladder and onto the watchtower platform. “I’m here!”

  “The deadline has passed, Ms. Kelly,” Bullhorn says. “You were warned. Now things have to go my way.” He waves a hand at the road. “And you folks get to go the highway.”

  “I haven’t…,” Brenda has to struggle to catch her breath. “We haven’t had time to speak to the HOA. The Board just met last night. These things take time to discuss. I told you that.”

  She doesn’t look at any of us as our eyes bore into her. I told you that? What the fuck does that mean?

  “Brenda. Brenda, Brenda, Brenda. I was very clear on the time frame of my plans,” Bullhorn shouts. “But for the sake of everyone else up there, and behind that gate, I’m sure, I will explain myself further.”

  “My name is Edward Vance,” he says. “Since Z-Day, I have been a very busy man. I have done everything in my power to make a safe place for myself.” He spreads his arms wide, indicating the men and women around him. “And, as long as my safety comes first, I make sure things are safe for those that believe in me.”

  “Believe in me?” I whisper. “That doesn’t sound good.”

  “I know him,” Melissa says. “I know that man.”

  I look from her to Jon. Something passes between them and he nods.

  “Oh, shit,” Melissa says. “Shit shit shit.”

  “What?” I ask.

  “Am I boring you?” Bullhorn shouts. “I hope not. May I continue? Thank you. You see, I have many, many followers. Many of my flock needs more space and resources than the world can provide.”

  He grins and lowers his bullhorn. When his voice booms at us, I realize he doesn’t even need the thing. Shit. Maybe I should call him Wall Street? “Whispering Pines is what community is all about. And I want that for my people. I want that to be our home. So…you have to leave. You leave and I won’t have to make you leave.”

  He waves his hand and points at Jon.

  “If you don’t leave?” he says as the crowd parts and a man comes forward with a Z secured by a catch pole around the neck. Bullhorn/Wall Street nods and the man shoves the Z at Jon.

  “NO!” Melissa screams as the thing’s teeth clamp down on his shoulder, ripping a chunk from him.

  Even with the layers of duct tape, we can all hear him screaming. The man yanks the Z away and a woman steps up and puts a bullet through its brain. It crumples to the ground, black blood oozing from its shattered skull. Jon has stopped screaming and is just staring down at the pavement. Stella and I grab Melissa before she can jump off the watchtower. She is ready to leap to her death to get to Jon.

  “That was just to punctuate my point,” Bullhorn/Wall Street says. “And my point is that we have thousands of Zs ready and waiting to come into your community and do that to all of you. Husbands, wives, children, grandparents. And you, Ms. Kelly. Especially you. I’d rather not, since it is a pain to have to corral and clean up after the buggers, but I will do what I need to do to secure the future of my flock. It’s God’s will and the American way.”

  He circles his hand in the air and his people start to head out. He lingers for a moment and watches us watching him. “Please know how serious I am. I don’t want to kill all of you, but I will. You have 48 hours to voluntarily leave before I send in the Zs.”

  “You’ll never break our defenses!” Mindy shouts down at him.

  “Shut up!” most of us shouts at her.

  “Wise advice,” Bullhorn/Wall Street says. “48 hours, Ms. Kelly. That is all. Not a second longer. And those defenses? While they are impressive, one of the many reasons I’d like to acquire Whispering Pines, they can’t stand up to wave after wave after wave of the undead. Nothing can. Until then, I bid you farewell. You have a lot of work to do before moving day.”

  He casually saunters off. I look about and wonder why the hell no one put a bolt or arrow between his eyes. Jesus, are we sheep?

  “Jace,” Stella says quietly as she looks down at Jon. He’s just laying there in a pool of his blood. “Is he…?”

  “I don’t know,” I say. “But I’ve got this.”

  I open one of the cabinets in the watchtower and pull out a rifle. I load two rounds into the breach and head to the ladder.

  “Where do you think you are going with that?” Brenda asks.

  “You weren’t authorized to take that weapon,” Mindy adds. Just before Melissa’s fist hits her square between the eyes. Mindy kinda stands there for a second, and then drops to her knees before falling on her face.

  “I can’t do it,” Melissa says.

  “I know,” I nod. “It’s because of me. It’s my duty.”

  The crowd parts as I step from the ladder and walk to the gate.

  “Open it,” I say. The two men manning the gate look up at Brenda. “You want that bitch to be the last thing you see?”

  They both look back at me quickly and open the gate. I walk through and kneel next to Jon. I manage to get the duct tape away from his mouth, but he isn’t saying anything. Not anymore. I look over my shoulder and see Stella and Melissa watching me. I shake my head. Melissa wails then buries her head in Stella’s shoulder.

  “You need help?” Elsbeth asks, suddenly at my side. I startle at how quiet she is. I didn’t even know she had followed me.

  “No, no, I got this,” I say as I stand up. “Farewell my friend.” I place the barrel of the rifle to his head and pull the trigger. No hesitation, no remorse other than the fact that I feel to blame. I won’t regret the shooting, but I will regret everything that led to it.

  “Help me carry him,” I say and sling the rifle over my shoulder. Elsbeth looks at me and I nod towards his body. “He was my friend. I won’t leave him out here. Please.”

  She shrugs and grabs his legs while I grab his shoulders. We carry him to the gate and everyone moves quickly out of the way. There are murmurs in the crowd, but they are drowned out by Brenda’s hisses.

  “You can’t bring an infected body into Whispering Pines!” she snaps at me. “It is strictly against everything in the covenants! No infected past the gate for any reason!”

  “He’s dead,” I say. “Dead dead. We’re going to have a service and then burn his body. No burying, no body left to rot. He’ll be burned and that will be that.”

  “I can’t allow it,” Brenda says. “Mindy? Mindy!”

  The moron comes waddling up, her hand to her face. She can barely focus on Brenda and me as she tries to play catch up.

  “Mindy, please have your team arrest Mr. Stanford,” Brenda says. “If he doesn’t turn around and put that body back outside, arrest him. This is blatant sedition and cannot be tolerated!”

  “You want me to what?” Mindy asks. I honestly think she doesn’t know what is going on. “I can’t do that? Can I?”

  “You can and will,” Brenda says and turns to the crowd, pointing at Jon’s body. “This is unfortunate, but the rules are here to protect us! To save us! How many of you had relatives turned outside that we had to put down and leave? Why should this man be held higher than them all? Why risk our lives?”

  I look about and see a lot of confusion as people try to decide what to do. But most of all I see fear. A
nd that fear is directed at the corpse in my hands.

  “You all knew Jon,” I say. “He helped build this place into what it is today. He deserves some respect.”

  I start to move away from Brenda, but several members of Mindy’s security team block my path.

  “Come on, guys,” I say. “You don’t have to do this.”

  “Arrest him,” Brenda hisses. “If you disobey the Board and the covenants, then you are guilty too and will be cast out.”

  I can see muscles tense and know what is close. I look over my shoulder and see Stella and Melissa coming towards me. I look across Jon’s body and see Elsbeth staring right at me. She is smiling.

  “No,” I say to her. “Don’t.” She frowns, but nods. “Set him down.”

  Elsbeth sets Jon’s legs down, but I keep a hold of his shoulders. Stella is at my side.

  “What is your plan?” she asks.

  “Same as before,” I say. “I just need you to make sure Elsbeth doesn’t hurt anyone.”

  Stella stares at me for a moment and then nods, kissing my unwounded cheek. She walks over to Elsbeth and takes her elbow, leading her away from the crowd. I start dragging Jon’s body.

  “Mindy,” Brenda snaps, “do your job.”

  “Jason Stanford,” Mindy says, trying to sound authoritative, but just sounding loud, “if you do not stop this moment, you will be under arrest.”

  I don’t stop.

  Hands grab me and I try to fight, but they overpower me quickly. I’m on the ground, my hands being tied behind my back when I look up and see Brenda smiling.

  “You’re wrong about this,” I say, “all of it.”

  “Not for you to say,” she says.

  They haul me up and drag me away. Brenda barks orders and a couple sentries gingerly pick up Jon’s body and carry it to the gate and they are lost from sight.

  Chapter Five

  The “jail” is just an empty house that sits next to Brenda’s house. The room I’m in is what would be called the “media room” on the developer’s floor plans. Ground floor room with double windows looking out onto the back yard and double doors leading to the living room. Same exact floor plan as my house. Other than the guard sitting outside the double doors, it’s not really very secure. I could probably crawl out the windows if I want.