Fire and Rain, Season 2, Episode 5 (Rising Storm)
Page 4
She felt more than saw his entire body stiffen.
“What is it?” he asked, his tone clearly taken aback.
She was already blinking rapidly, her eyes stinging with tears. She rarely talked about it. It was too painful to think about, let alone voice aloud.
But he deserved to know. And she needed to unload some of the burden of it onto the only person who could truly share it with her. They’d be the stronger for it in the end, she knew. If he could forgive her, that is.
“When you left, all those years ago,” she began, but stopped, not sure how to go on.
“What? What is it?” he prompted her.
“When you left, when I told you to go...” No, that felt all wrong. She tried to say it another way. “I didn’t want to trap you here. I knew I could have made you stay.”
“You could have,” he agreed.
“But you’d have resented me forever for it,” she added.
“What are you saying?” he asked slowly, with growing trepidation.
“I was pregnant when you left,” she said tearfully.
Chase looked as if all the air had been sucked from the truck. Not that she blamed him. It was quite a bombshell after all. He rolled down the window, loosening his collar. “Oh, Annie.”
“I…” She sucked in a deep breath. “I lost the baby a few months after you left. A miscarriage. I hadn’t quite worked up the nerve to tell you by then, and after…”
“You could have called me. You know I’d have—”
“I do. It’s just that…I was very distraught. It was the most painful thing I’d ever been through. At the time I didn’t see the point of burdening you with it.”
“But it was my burden, too. Oh, God,” he said, his voice full of anguish. “I’m so sorry. I wish I’d known. I wish more than anything that I could have been there for you.”
“I know that. I think I always knew that.”
“I can’t believe you had to go through something like that alone. You shouldn’t have been alone. I’m so sorry,” he repeated. “I feel so guilty.”
“You shouldn’t. You really shouldn’t. You didn’t know. And I wasn’t alone. I had Rita Mae. And now, after all these years, I have you again.”
He squeezed her hands. “You do have me. For good this time. I promise.”
They were both crying, but Anna Mae’s tears weren’t just from sadness. There was relief in them, as well. The solace of shared grief had brought her a measure of peace about their lost child that she’d never had before.
“No more secrets. No more holding back. The past can’t hurt us anymore,” she vowed.
“It can’t. Not if we face it head on. Together.”
“Together,” she agreed.
It was maybe ten minutes later when the unmistakably ornery voice of Rita Mae startled them apart. “Making out in a pickup truck like teenagers again?” she called out.
Chase let out a breathless laugh.
“Honestly, Rita Mae!” Anna Mae called back, a smile in her voice. “That was rude! We were just getting to the good part!”
CHAPTER FIVE
Kristin watched Travis get dressed. He’d lingered with her even longer than usual today, but he had to go back to his wife and family at some point. No matter what he professed to her, he always went back.
She couldn’t help but resent that. She wished she could keep him all to herself, day and night.
“I’ll come over again tomorrow,” he said, zipping up his pants.
She felt a wave of bitterness toward him and all of the obligations that made her come last in his life. “I don’t know about that. I can’t do this forever. You say one thing, then do another, and the fact is that every day is the same. You come over, stealing a few minutes or hours in my bed, and leave me again. We’ve never even spent the night together. Sometimes I feel like this is nothing but a cheap affair for you.”
He sent her a surprised look, and her resentment grew all the more. She was beginning to feel like he took her for granted. She gave him everything he needed and he barely spared a thought for her, like she was only there to suit his needs.
When she thought about it, that did seem to be the nature of their arrangement. She gave. He took. He left.
“I’ll tell you what,” he said, his tone cajoling. “Give me a few days, and I’ll figure out a way for us to get some time together. A weekend away, just the two of us.”
That sounded divine, but she didn’t trust it. “Do you mean it?” Her question was deceptively bland. She was always very careful not to demand too much from him. He got enough of that from his marriage, and she went out of her way to show him that it wouldn’t be like that with her. Where his wife lacked, and he’d told her all of the ways that woman lacked, Kristin made a point to excel, and she always made sure he saw it.
“Yes, of course. I always mean it with you. I even have the perfect place in mind. There’s a new resort I heard about in Bastrop that’s supposed to be lovely. It’s all the way on the other side of Austin, so that should give us plenty of privacy, away from the prying eyes of Storm. I’ll make the arrangements as soon as I can manage.”
“Arrangements for when? This weekend?”
His brow furrowed. “I’m not sure how quickly I can make plans. I’ll have to talk to my wife, I mean Celeste, er, I mean my family, but as soon as I can possibly manage it, we’ll go away together. I promise.”
She kissed him good-bye, feeling somewhat appeased, and quieting the voice in her head that reminded her just how many promises he hadn’t kept so far.
He surprised her, though, and sooner than she’d expected he actually came through with his promise, and she was giddy with excitement as she prepared for their first weekend away together.
She’d have him all to herself for two solid days. They could do whatever they wanted. Hold hands in public. Share meals together.
She couldn’t stop fantasizing about all of the possibilities.
What she fixated on the most was that she would get to be on his arm out in the open for all to see. They would be running into complete strangers and those people would assume that he was hers, that they were together, that they were a normal couple. No one would suspect that Travis had a needy wife back at home waiting for him.
That was harsh. Even she could concede that Celeste had been through too much to deal with it alone. Losing a son would be devastating.
She blew out a breath, pushing all thoughts of Celeste from her mind, and concentrated on looking for something special for the weekend at Pink. Although the boutique prices were a little steep for her tastes, she was in the mood to splurge on something extravagant.
“Looking for something special?” a sales clerk asked as she sifted through a rack of lacy slips.
Kristin couldn’t keep the smile off her face. In fact, she hadn’t been able to for days. “Just browsing. Seeing if something catches my eye.”
“Are you leaning toward a functioning slip, or are you more interested in one that’s meant to be seen?” The girl gave her a smile. “Because if you’re looking for something a little more showy, we just got a gorgeous new shipment of lace and silk lingerie. I haven’t even put them on the floor yet. They’re all still in back, but I can bring some out for you if you’re interested.”
Why not? “That would be lovely. Thank you.”
“What color? And do you prefer more lace or more silk?”
“Black or pink. And I like both.”
“You got it. Give me one minute.” The girl gave her one more friendly smile and headed to the back of the store.
Kristin spared a brief thought as to whether she was being indiscreet to so publicly shop for lingerie, but she internally shrugged it off. Even if she wasn’t seeing someone, which was nobody’s business, every girl liked to buy herself something pretty on occasion.
The clerk came back in short order, and Kristin had to agree that the lingerie was gorgeous.
And costly. A surreptitious glance
at the price tag of the black lacy piece that caught her eye let her know that it was at the very top of her price range.
But how often did she do this? Never was the answer. And she wanted to change that. To treat herself. No one else would ever put her first if she didn’t do it herself.
“I’ll take it,” she decided out loud, handing the lingerie to the sales lady.
“Did you want to try it on?” the girl asked.
Kristin was generally true to size, so she waved that off. “No, I’m sure it will fit.”
“I’ll hold onto it at the register for you. Let me know if you need help with anything else, the fitting rooms are over there.”
Kristin thanked her and continued shopping. Despite the fact that she was already going to spend more than she’d intended, she found herself trying on dresses for another half an hour.
The dilemma she had was that she couldn’t decide if she wanted a pretty dress for daytime wear, or a sexy number for evening. What made her decide was that all of the little black dresses tended toward formal, and she knew that the weekend would be more laid back.
If she was being honest with herself, she knew they’d be spending most of their time in bed, particularly for the evening hours.
Pretty daytime dress it was.
She shopped until she found just the right one. It was simple, a soft pink cotton sheath. She knew instantly when she tried it on. It was a perfect fit, hugging all of her curves, with a V-neck bodice and pretty crochet detailing at the midriff.
Travis would love it.
She paid for the dress and lingerie, then humming a happy tune under her breath, she headed for the car, passing in front of the Storm Oak, so lost in thought she was completely oblivious when a flyer was thrust in front of her.
Startled, Kristin looked up to find Travis’s youngest daughter, Lacey.
“We’re raising money for a memorial bench for Jacob, if you’re interested. No pressure.” The girl said it all in a rush, like she’d rehearsed it.
Kristin smiled at her. “I’d love to help.”
“The details are on the flyer, along with a list of places and people you can go directly to if you’d care to contribute.”
“I’ll do that,” Kristin told her. “Maybe we can even put a collection can in Pushing Up Daisies.”
“Thanks. That would be awesome.” The younger girl’s enthusiasm was catching.
Kristin smiled, then moved on, heading to her car, wondering how brazen it would be of her to befriend the girl that she hoped would someday be her stepdaughter.
* * * *
Kristin was at her home packing a few hours later when her doorbell rang.
She smiled, assuming that it was Travis. She wasn’t expecting him, but it wouldn’t be the first time he’d ducked out of work early to come see her.
Her face fell when she opened the door and found herself facing her brother, Bryce.
He was unsmiling, eyes grim, the set of his jaw as stern as she’d ever seen it. “May I come in?” he asked somberly.
It didn’t occur to her to say no. “Of course.” She waved him in.
“What are you up to?” she asked, closing the door behind him.
It was only as he moved deeper into the house that she remembered the half-packed suitcase in her bedroom. It was clearly visible from her small living room, and so Bryce spotted it almost immediately.
Even more unfortunate and impossible to miss was the little slip of a black nightie laid across her bed.
“Planning a trip?” he asked her, the question sounding accusatory to her ear.
Her mind raced for an excuse for the half-packed luggage, and even the lingerie, but he spoke again before she could bother.
“This has gone too far. So let me just say this to be absolutely clear. You know that I know about the affair. About Travis Salt. How did you let yourself become the other woman, Kristin? An adulteress? This isn’t who you are.”
“It’s not like that,” she said defensively. “You’re oversimplifying it. You don’t understand. What Travis and I have is special. It’s not some cheap affair. We’re in love.”
He shook his head again, his eyes bleak, the set of his mouth hard. “Don’t you realize that you’ve taken advantage of an unfortunate situation? You’ve taken the unspeakable pain this couple has gone through losing their son and used it for your own gain. Used it to break apart a family. To steal another woman’s husband. Can’t you see how wrong that is?”
“You’re twisting it. Their marriage was over long before Jacob died. She’s not what he needs. She never was. I am. I’m the one that deserves be his wife.”
“That’s your excuse? Do you think that makes it better? It does not. And this is the problem with stepping into someone else’s marriage. You’re only seeing things from one narrow perspective, as they affect you. Who are you to say their marriage is over? Marriages are never perfect. They are complicated. And sacred. I love you, Kristin, but I have never in my life been so disappointed in you.”
She didn’t know what to say, but her chest ached with his words and guilt nearly swayed her resolve.
“It’s not too late to try to do the right thing,” he told her, voice softer now, almost cajoling. “Walk away from him. Let them sort their marriage out themselves. Whether it grows stronger or falls apart should be up to the two of them, not the two of you. Can’t you see how wrong it is for you to interfere?”
Just the thought of Travis choosing his wife over her made her distraught, and she snapped back, “It is too late. I’ve made my choice. And so has Travis. He wants me. Not her.”
That seemed to take the steam right out of him. He didn’t say another word until he was at the door. “You know where to find me if you need me. I love you and I’ll always be there for you,” he said quietly. “I don’t understand the choices you’re making here, but I won’t give up on you.” He left.
His words upset her deeply, made her doubt her actions and herself.
But they did not stop her, and by the time she was packed and ready for her trip, she’d talked herself out of letting it ruin her weekend.
Her brother just didn’t understand. He’d found love early and been blessed with a family. He didn’t know what it was like to be lonely, to worry that you’d stay lonely for the rest of your life.
Travis called her right before he hit the road, and she followed suit.
They had to take separate cars to the resort. Kristin had balked at this at first, but she couldn’t argue with the logic of it for long. It was the more circumspect thing to do. Of course it was. That didn’t mean she had to like it.
Still, she shook it off during the long drive. Nothing was going to spoil their idyllic weekend. She was wearing her new dress. She’d painstakingly applied her makeup and curled her hair. She looked her best and had two whole days ahead of her of pretending she had Travis all to herself.
Other than the occasional, infrequent moments when her brother’s voice got into her head, admonishing her, lecturing her, judging her, it was a near perfect weekend.
The resort was a lazy, luxurious getaway. The food was amazing and the wine was superb. Their time there was spent somewhat idly, but Kristin couldn’t get enough of being out in public with Travis. Of being able to touch him with other people around, being able to freely stake her claim. She’d never been much for PDA but she did get carried away a time or two, kissing him passionately for anyone around them to see, just because she could.
A few times people even referred to Kristin as his wife or Travis as her husband, and she ate it up, never once correcting them.
They spent time drinking wine and strolling around the gardens hand in hand like they didn’t have a care in the world. They met a friendly couple who were visiting from Austin and hit it off so well that they all shared a table one night for dinner.
“We don’t have many opportunities to do things like this,” the woman, Joan, told Kristin as they dined. “We both work too much.
But it’s our twentieth wedding anniversary, so we wanted to do something special.”
“Congratulations!” Kristin exclaimed. “Twenty years! That’s wonderful!”
Joan smiled. “You know how it is. Marriage has its ups and downs, but it’s the best decision I ever made. How about y’all? How long have you been married?”
Travis, who’d been chatting with Joan’s husband, looked uncomfortable with the question and seemed unsure of what to say.
Kristin didn’t miss a beat. “Our ten-year wedding anniversary is coming up next March.”
“Nice!” Joan said. “When in March? That’s my birthday month.”
“March 15th,” Travis said.
“You two got married on the Ides of March?” Joan’s husband seemed to find that very amusing.
Kristin decided that she was better at lying on the fly than Travis was going by how nervous he looked.
“Where did y’all say you were from again?” Joan asked. She was harmless, one of those open, friendly types that never realized that most people were keeping secrets.
“Austin,” Kristin lied.
“Storm,” Travis didn’t.
“We used to live in Austin, now we live in Storm,” Kristin corrected.
“Storm, Texas.” Joan seemed to recognize the name. “Isn’t that the town where that senator is from? What’s his name? The handsome one with all of the sex scandals.”
“Senator Rush,” her husband provided.
Travis grimaced, but the couple didn’t seem to notice.
“Yeah, that’s where he’s from,” Kristin told them. “Our claim to fame.”
They all laughed.
“Well, from what I’ve seen, it seems like an adorable little town,” Joan told her. “We’ll have to exchange numbers, and if we ever drive through, we can all do lunch or something.”
“We’d love that,” Kristin agreed enthusiastically, figuring it could never happen, but what the hell, she was having fun.
That talk at dinner seemed to make Travis a bit paranoid, and they mostly kept to themselves after that.
Kristin didn’t mind. She was having the time of her life. Travis even took her shopping in the small but swanky gift shop and bought her everything that caught her eye.