The Rose and the Yew Tree

by Agatha Christie, writing as Mary Westmacott

  ‘Thanking you, Miss, for your kindness, and we know you’ve done all you can, but it’s just too awful in the country, and the children having to walk in the mud to school. But thanking you all the same. I hope as everything has been left all right.’

  The billeting officer did not try any more. He was learning wisdom. In due course Miss Tregellis let the detached wing to Captain Carslake, the Conservative agent, who also led a busy life as an Air Raid Warden and an officer in the Home Guard.

  Robert and Teresa were perfectly willing for the Carslakes to continue as tenants. Indeed, it was doubtful if they could have turned them out. But it meant that a great deal of pre-election activity centred in and around Polnorth House as well as the Conservative offices in St Loo High Street.

  Teresa, as she had foreseen, was swept into the vortex. She drove cars, and distributed leaflets, and did a little tentative canvassing. St Loo’s recent political history was unsettled. As a fashionable seaside watering place, superimposed on a fishing port, and with agricultural surroundings, it had naturally always returned a Conservative. The outlying agricultural districts were Conservative to a man. But the character of St Loo had changed in the last fifteen years. It had become a tourist resort in summer with small boarding houses. It had a large colony of artists’ bungalows, like a rash, spread along the cliffs. The people who made up the present population were serious, artistic; cultured and, in politics, definitely pink if not red.

  There had been a by-election in 1943 on the retirement of Sir George Borrodaile at the age of sixty-nine after his second stroke. And to the horror of the old inhabitants, for the first time in history, a Labour MP was returned.

  ‘Mind you,’ said Captain Carslake, swaying to and fro on his heels as he imparted past history to Teresa and myself, ‘I’m not saying we didn’t ask for it.’

  Carslake was a lean, little dark man, horsy-looking, with sharp, almost furtive eyes. He had become a captain in 1918 when he had entered the Army Service Corps. He was competent politically and knew his job.

  You must understand that I myself am a tyro in politics – I never really understand the jargon. My account of the St Loo election is probably wildly inaccurate. It bears the same relation to reality as Robert’s pictures of trees do to the particular trees he happens to be painting at the moment. The actual trees are trees, entities with barks and branches and leaves and acorns or chestnuts. Robert’s trees are blodges and splodges of thick oil paint applied in a certain pattern and wildly surprising colours to a certain area of canvas. The two things are not at all alike. In my own opinion, Robert’s trees are not even recognizable as trees – they might just as easily be plates of spinach or a gas works. But they are Robert’s idea of trees. And my account of politics in St Loo is my impression of a political election. It is probably not recognizable as such to a politician. I daresay I shall get the terms and the procedure wrong. But to me the election was only the unimportant and confusing background for a life-size figure – John Gabriel.

  Chapter Four

  The first mention of John Gabriel came on the evening when Carslake was explaining to Teresa that as regards the result of the by-election they had asked for it.

  Sir James Bradwell of Torington Park had been the Conservative candidate. He was a resident of the district, he had some money, and was a good dyed-in-the-wool Tory with sound principles. He was a man of upright character. He was also sixty-two, devoid of intellectual fire, or of quick reactions – had no gift of public speaking and was quite helpless if heckled.

  ‘Pitiful on a platform,’ said Carslake. ‘Quite pitiful. Er and ah and erhem – just couldn’t get on with it. We wrote his speeches, of course, and we had a good speaker down always for the important meetings. It would have been all right ten years ago. Good honest chap, local, straight as a die, and a gentleman. But nowadays – they want more than that!’

  ‘They want brains?’ I suggested.

  Carslake didn’t seem to think much of brains.

  ‘They want a downy sort of chap – slick – knows the answers, can get a quick laugh. And, of course, they want someone who’ll promise the earth. An old-fashioned chap like Bradwell is too conscientious to do that sort of thing. He won’t say that everyone will have houses, and the war will end tomorrow, and every woman’s going to have central heating and a washing machine.

  ‘And, of course,’ he went on, ‘the swing of the pendulum had begun. We’ve been in too long. Anything for a change. The other chap, Wilbraham, was a competent fellow, earnest, been a schoolmaster, invalided out of the Army, big talk about what was going to be done for the returning ex-serviceman – and the usual hot air about Nationalization and the Health Schemes. What I mean is, he put over his stuff well. Got in with a majority of over two thousand. First time such a thing’s ever happened in St Loo. Shook us all up, I can tell you. We’ve got to do better this time. We’ve got to get Wilbraham out.’

  ‘Is he popular?’

  ‘So so. Doesn’t spend much money in the place, but he’s conscientious and got a nice manner with him. It won’t be too easy getting him out. We’ve got to pull our socks up all over the country.’

  ‘You don’t think Labour will get in?’

  We were incredulous about such a possibility before the election of 1945.

  Carslake said of course Labour wouldn’t get in – the county was solidly behind Churchill.

  ‘But we shan’t have the same majority in the country. Depends, of course, how the Liberal vote goes. Between you and me, Mrs Norreys, I shan’t be surprised if we see a big increase in the Liberal vote.’

  I glanced sideways at Teresa. She was trying to assume the face of one politically intent.

  ‘I’m sure you’ll be a great help to us,’ said Carslake heartily to her.

  Teresa murmured, ‘I’m afraid I’m not a very keen politician.’

  Carslake said breezily, ‘We must all work hard.’

  He looked at me in a calculating manner. I at once offered to address envelopes.

  ‘I still have the use of my arms,’ I said.

  He looked embarrassed at once and began to rock on his heels again.

  ‘Splendid,’ he said. ‘Splendid. Where did you get yours? North Africa?’

  I said I had got it in the Harrow Road. That finished him. His embarrassment was so acute as to be catching.

  Clutching at a straw, he turned to Teresa.

  ‘Your husband,’ he said, ‘he’ll help us too?’

  Teresa shook her head.

  ‘I’m afraid,’ she said, ‘he’s a Communist.’

  If she had said Robert had been a black mamba she couldn’t have upset Carslake more. He positively shuddered.

  ‘You see,’ explained Teresa, ‘he’s an artist.’

  Carslake brightened a little at that. Artists, writers, that sort of thing …

  ‘I see,’ he said broad-mindedly. ‘Yes, I see.’

  ‘And that gets Robert out of it,’ Teresa said to me afterwards.

  I told her that she was an unscrupulous woman.

  When Robert came in, Teresa informed him of his political faith.

  ‘But I’ve never been a member of the Communist Party,’ he protested. ‘I mean, I do like their ideas. I think the whole ideology is right.’

  ‘Exactly,’ said Teresa. ‘That’s what I told Carslake. And from time to time we’ll leave Karl Marx open across the arm of your chair – and then you’ll be quite safe from being asked to do anything.’

  ‘That’s all very well, Teresa,’ said Robert doubtfully. ‘Suppose the other side get at me?’

  Teresa reassured him.

  ‘They won’t. As far as I can see, the Labour Party is far more frightened of the Communists than the Tories are.’

  ‘I wonder,’ I said, ‘what our candidate’s like?’

  For Carslake had been just a little evasive on the subject.

  Teresa had asked him if Sir James was going to contest the seat again and Carslake had shaken his he
ad.

  ‘No, not this time. We’ve got to make a big fight. I don’t know how it will go, I’m sure.’ He looked very harassed. ‘He’s not a local man.’

  ‘Who is he?’

  ‘A Major Gabriel. He’s a VC.’

  ‘This war? Or the last?’

  ‘Oh, this war. He’s quite a youngish chap. Thirty-four. Splendid war record. Got his VC for “Unusual coolness, heroism and devotion to duty”. He was in command of a machine-gun position under constant enemy fire in the attack at Salerno. All but one of his crew were killed and although wounded himself he held the position alone until all the ammunition was exhausted. He then retired to the main position, killed several of the enemy with hand-grenades and dragged the remaining seriously wounded member of his crew to safety. Good show, what? Unfortunately, he’s not much to look at – small, insignificant chap.’

  ‘How will he stand the test of the public platform?’ I asked.

  Carslake’s face brightened.

  ‘Oh, he’s all right there. Positively slick, if you know what I mean. Quick as lightning. Good at getting a laugh, too. Some of it, mind you, is rather cheap stuff –’ For a moment Carslake’s face showed a sensitive distaste. He was a real Conservative, I perceived, he preferred acute boredom to the meretriciously amusing. ‘But it goes down – oh yes, it goes down.

  ‘Of course,’ he added, ‘he has no background …’

  ‘You mean he isn’t a Cornishman?’ I said. ‘Where does he come from?’

  ‘To tell you the truth, I’ve no idea … He doesn’t come from anywhere exactly – if you know what I mean. We shall keep dark on all that. Play up the war angle – gallant service – all that. He can stand, you know, for the plain man – the ordinary Englishman. He’s not our usual type, of course …’ He looked unhappy about it. ‘I’m afraid Lady St Loo doesn’t really approve.’

  Teresa asked delicately if it mattered whether Lady St Loo approved. It transpired that it did. Lady St Loo was the head of the Conservative Women’s Association, and the Conservative Women were a power in St Loo. They ran things, and managed things, and got up things, and they had, so Carslake said, a great influence on the women’s vote. The women’s vote, he said, was always tricky.

  Then he brightened up a little.

  ‘That’s one reason why I’m optimistic about Gabriel,’ he said. ‘He gets on with women.’

  ‘But not with Lady St Loo?’

  Lady St Loo, Carslake said, was being very good about it … She acknowledged quite frankly that she was old-fashioned. But she was whole-heartedly behind whatever the Party thought necessary.

  ‘After all,’ said Carslake sadly, ‘times have changed. We used to have gentlemen in politics. Precious few of them now. I wish this chap was a gentleman, but he isn’t, and there it is. If you can’t have a gentleman, I suppose a hero is the next best thing.’

  Which, I remarked to Teresa after he had left, was practically an epigram.

  Teresa smiled. Then she said she was rather sorry for Major Gabriel.

  ‘What do you think he’s like?’ she said. ‘Pretty dreadful?’

  ‘No, I should think he was rather a nice chap.’

  ‘Because of his VC?’

  ‘Lord, no. You can get a VC for being merely reckless – or even for being just stupid. You know, it’s always said that old Freddy Elton got his VC for being too stupid to know when to retire from an advanced position. They called it holding on in face of almost insurmountable odds. Really he had no idea that everyone else had gone.’

  ‘Don’t be ridiculous, Hugh. Why do you think this Gabriel person must be nice?’

  ‘Simply, I think, because Carslake doesn’t like him. The only man Carslake would like would be some awful stuffed shirt.’

  ‘What you mean is, that you don’t like poor Captain Carslake!’

  ‘No poor about it. Carslake fits into his job like a bug in a rug. And what a job!’

  ‘Is it worse than any other job? It’s hard work.’

  ‘Yes, that’s true. But if your whole life is spent on the calculation of what effect this has on that – you’ll end up by not knowing what this and that really are.’

  ‘Divorced from reality?’

  ‘Yes, isn’t that what politics really boil down to in the end? What people will believe, what they will stand, what they can be induced to think? Never plain fact.’

  ‘Ah!’ said Teresa. ‘How right I am not to take politics seriously.’

  ‘You are always right, Teresa,’ I said and kissed my hand to her.

  I myself didn’t actually see the Conservative Candidate until the big meeting in the Drill Hall.

  Teresa had procured for me an up-to-date type of wheeled invalid couch. I could be wheeled out on the terrace on it and lie there in a sheltered sunny place. Then, as the movement of the chair caused me less pain, I went further afield. I was occasionally pushed into St Loo. The Drill Hall meeting was an afternoon one, and Teresa arranged that I should be present at it. It would, she assured me, amuse me. I replied that Teresa had curious ideas of amusement.

  ‘You’ll see,’ said Teresa, adding, ‘it will entertain you enormously to see everyone taking themselves so seriously.’

  ‘Besides,’ she went on, ‘I shall be wearing my Hat.’

  Teresa, who never wears a hat unless she goes to a wedding, had made an expedition to London and had returned with the kind of hat which was, according to her, suitable for a Conservative Woman.

  ‘And what,’ I inquired, ‘is a hat suitable to a Conservative Woman?’

  Teresa replied in detail.

  It must, she said, be a hat of good material, not dowdy, but not too fashionable. It must set well on the head and it must not be frivolous.

  She then produced the hat, and it was indeed all that Teresa had set forth that it should be.

  She put it on and Robert and I applauded.

  ‘It’s damned good, Teresa,’ said Robert. ‘It makes you look earnest and as though you had a purpose in life.’

  You will understand, therefore, that to see Teresa sitting on the platform wearing the Hat lured me irresistibly to the Drill Hall on a remarkably fine summer’s afternoon.

  The Drill Hall was well filled by prosperous-looking elderly people. Anybody under forty was (wisely, in my opinion) enjoying the pleasures of the seaside. As my invalid couch was carefully wheeled by a boy scout to a position of vantage near the wall by the front seats, I speculated as to the usefulness of such meetings. Everyone in this hall was sure to vote our way. Our opponents were holding an opposition meeting in the Girls’ School. Presumably they, too, would have a full meeting of staunch supporters. How, then, was public opinion influenced? The loud-speaker truck? Open-air meetings?

  My speculations were interrupted by the shuffling of a small party of people coming on to the platform which hitherto had held nothing but chairs, a table, and a glass of water.

  They whispered, gesticulated, and finally got settled in the required positions. Teresa, in the Hat, was relegated to the second row amongst the minor personalities.

  The Chairman, several tottery old gentlemen, the Speaker from Headquarters, Lady St Loo, two other women and the Candidate arranged themselves in the front row.

  The Chairman began to speak in a quavery, rather sweet voice. His mumbled platitudes were practically inaudible. He was a very old general who had served with distinction in the Boer War. (Or was it, I queried to myself, the Crimean?) Whatever it was, it must have been a long time ago. The world he was mumbling about did not, I thought, now exist … The thin apple-sweet old voice stopped, there was spontaneous and enthusiastic applause – the applause given always, in England, to a friend who has stood the test of time … Everyone in St Loo knew old General S______. He was a fine old boy, they said, one of the old school.

  With his concluding words, General S_______ had introduced to the meeting a member of the new school, the Conservative Candidate, Major Gabriel, VC.

  It was then, wit
h a deep and gusty sigh, that Lady Tressilian, whom I suddenly discovered to be in the end seat of a row close to me (I suspected that her maternal instinct had placed her there), breathed poignantly:

  ‘It’s such a pity that he’s got such common legs.’

  I knew immediately what she meant. Yet asked to define what is or is not common in a leg, I could not for the life of me tell you. Gabriel was not a tall man. He had, I should say, the normal legs for his height – they were neither unduly long nor unduly short. His suit was quite a well-cut one. Nevertheless, indubitably, those trousered legs were not the legs of a gentleman. Is it, perhaps, in the structure and poise of the nether limbs that the essence of gentility resides? A question for the Brains Trust.

  Gabriel’s face did not give him away, it was an ugly, but quite interesting face, with remarkably fine eyes. His legs gave him away every time.

  He rose to his feet, smiled (an engaging smile), opened his mouth and spoke in a flat, slightly cockney voice.

  He spoke for twenty minutes – and he spoke well. Don’t ask me what he said. Offhand I should say that he said the usual things – and said them more or less in the usual manner. But he got across. There was something dynamic about the man. You forgot what he looked like, you forgot that he had an ugly voice and accent. You had instead a great impression of earnestness – of single-minded purpose. You felt: this chap jolly well means to do his best. Sincerity – that was it, sincerity.