The Doctor's Wife for Keeps

by Alison Roberts

They weren’t that far from Luke’s apartment.

  If they went back there and made love, she’d know that things were really back to normal. That she could trust they’d overcome the first, palpable obstacle in their relationship.

  But as the castle walls towered higher behind them as they started walking down the hill again, Luke cleared his throat. ‘There’s something else...’

  ‘Oh?’ Kate’s steps slowed.

  ‘That night when you had the accident and we were in the emergency department and that consultant wanted to know who I was, you said I was your fiancé.’

  Kate had stopped now. Or maybe it was Luke who had paused, waiting for her response. The traffic of other people flowed around them but there was only one person who mattered at the moment.

  ‘It seemed like the easiest way to explain things.’

  ‘I know. But... I liked it.’

  ‘Oh...’ Someone bumped Kate’s shoulder but she barely noticed.

  ‘I know you said we didn’t need a wedding or the piece of paper but...you might think it’s silly but I think I do want it.’

  ‘It’s not silly.’ No more than feeling like parents when the reality was still a long way in the future.

  ‘So you’d do that? Marry me?’

  It might not be any more romantic than the first time he’d proposed to her and it was rather public but nobody else in this busy street had any idea of how private this conversation was. And she couldn’t complain about the setting when it had the backdrop of this beautiful, ancient castle.

  ‘When?’

  ‘Soon. I knew there was a good reason to do that paperwork. If I can find a registry office with a space, we could do it tomorrow.’

  Kate’s jaw dropped. ‘You’re kidding. I don’t even have a dress.’

  ‘Okay...next week, then?’ Luke was grinning as he pulled her into his arms again. ‘The clothes don’t matter, Katy. It’s what we do with the rest of our lives that matters and... I want to do it with you. I love you.’

  * * *

  ‘Are you free Thursday afternoon?’

  ‘I’m not sure. Why?’ Georgia had opened the fridge and was staring inside. ‘I’m hungry but I have no idea what I want to eat.’

  ‘Stay away from the eggs.’

  ‘I’m over that now.’ With a sigh, she pushed the door closed. ‘But there’s nothing in there that looks interesting. Let’s go out for a curry.’

  ‘Do you really think that’s a good idea? Anyway, I’m making a great salad here.’

  Georgia glanced at the chopping board in front of Kate and grimaced. ‘I’m hungry. Salad isn’t real food. And I’m bored. Let’s go down Buchanan Street and do some late night shopping and then find something exciting to eat. What about nachos? You love nachos.’

  ‘Mmm. I can’t deny that.’

  ‘And shopping is always fun. We haven’t done that for ages.’

  ‘I guess you do need some maternity clothes.’ Kate paused in her task of slicing a capsicum and eyed her friend’s midriff. ‘You know, you look a lot bigger than I would have expected for not quite five months along.’

  She turned to give Georgia her full attention. ‘Is there something you’re not telling me? Like, that you were already pregnant when we went off to that competition? Was it just a cover story that you were planning to hook up with someone you’d never have to see again?’

  Georgia shook her head. ‘But yeah...there is something I haven’t told you.’

  ‘Uh-oh...’

  ‘It’s not something bad. I didn’t tell you to start with because I knew you’d worry more. And then, after your accident, I didn’t want to make things worse...’

  ‘How could it have made things any worse?’

  Georgia closed her eyes. ‘It’s twins.’

  The knife clattered onto the bench. Stunned, Kate walked to the table and sat down. Georgia followed her example.

  ‘I’m sorry. It’s like adding insult to injury, isn’t it? I know you were excited about being pregnant, too.’

  ‘It’s not that.’ Kate summoned a smile. ‘I’m okay, really. Luke and I are going to try again as soon as we’re ready.’ She rubbed at her forehead with her fingers. ‘It’s... Oh, my God, Georgie...how are you going to cope with two babies on your own?’

  ‘I’ll cope.’

  ‘But if Luke gets this job in New Zealand, I might be out of the country by the time the babies are born. You don’t have any family to help.’ She bit her bottom lip. ‘I’ll tell him I can’t go until you’re settled. Or...you’ll just have to emigrate too.’

  ‘I told you I don’t want to move to New Zealand. I’m Scottish. This is my home. I’ll come and visit, though. Hey...you’re not going to cry, are you? I’m happy about this.’

  ‘You are?’

  ‘Of course. I’m getting an instant family. I won’t have to go hunting for another father down the track so that my kid isn’t an only child, like us.’

  ‘But...’ Kate’s breath came out in a whoosh. ‘You’ll have to get two of everything. It’ll be more expensive. Harder. You won’t get any sleep. This makes everything so much bigger...’

  ‘Including my waistline.’ Georgia grinned but then sighed. ‘This is why I didn’t want to tell you, Kate. I knew you’d start worrying about everything and this is my business. My choice. I’ll cope. One step at a time. And I don’t want you to tell anybody. You have to promise not to say anything. Even to Luke.’

  ‘Why?’

  ‘Because I want to keep working as long as I can. You know how word gets around in medical circles. If other people react like you and just see the problems, I might find I don’t even have light duties available any more. And then I won’t be able to save enough money and things really will be harder.’

  Kate was silent. Was that really what she was doing—only seeing the problems? Georgia was genuinely happy about this and she should be supporting her best friend.

  ‘And I don’t want you changing any of your plans because of me. I’ll miss you like crazy, of course, but I think it’s brilliant that you’re going to go and have an exciting new life in New Zealand. You and Luke belong together. You’re perfect for each other. Has he asked you to marry him yet?’

  ‘Yes.’

  Georgia gasped. ‘And you didn’t tell me? That’s way worse than me not telling you I’ve got two bairns on board.’

  ‘I was about to tell you. That’s why I asked whether you were free on Thursday afternoon. At two o’clock? I...um...need a bridesmaid.’

  ‘And you’re telling me this now? With...one, two...’ Georgia was counting on her fingers. ‘With three days to go?’

  ‘I only just found out a couple of hours ago. We weren’t planning on doing it this fast, but there was a cancellation at the registry office in Edinburgh and if we hadn’t grabbed it, we might have had to wait for months. It’s no big deal, Georgie.’

  Georgia was shaking her head. ‘I can’t believe this. Me? I could imagine ducking into a registry office or running off to Gretna Green for a quickie marriage if I had the inclination to marry anybody, which I don’t, but you? I always thought you’d go for the whole meringue dress and rose petal confetti and some mushy love song echoing around the church as you walked down the aisle.’

  Kate shrugged. ‘The window dressing isn’t what’s important.’

  ‘It is to some people.’

  ‘I love Luke. He loves me.’

  ‘He actually said the “L” word?’

  Kate nodded, a soft smile curving her lips. He had said it. And even if he’d only meant it in the spirit of deep friendship, that look in his eyes had told her everything she’d needed to know.

  That this was real.

  That it could last a lifetime.

  It didn’t matter that he wasn’t in love with her. Or that this wedding
was merely a formality.

  It didn’t matter. So why did it feel like her smile was fading into oblivion?

  ‘Wow...’

  ‘I know, right?’

  ‘And you’re happy?’

  Kate’s nod was firm. Was she trying to convince Georgia or herself? ‘So happy.’

  ‘That makes two of us, then.’ Georgia was smiling now. ‘But this lack of window dressing business, that doesn’t apply to you, does it?’

  ‘How do you mean?’

  ‘You’re going to wear a dress? Get your hair done? Carry some flowers?’

  ‘Yeah...of course. I want it to be special.’

  ‘So what are you going to wear?’

  ‘I don’t know. I haven’t had time to think about it yet.

  ‘It has to be new.’

  ‘Does it?’

  ‘Of course it does. This is the start of the rest of your life. And there’ll be photographs. And...good grief... I’m going to be in those photographs. I’ve got to find a dress that doesn’t make me look like a sack of potatoes.’ Georgia grabbed the corner of the table to help her get to her feet. ‘Come on. We’re going shopping.’

  * * *

  ‘What do you think?’

  Kate stared at her reflection as Georgia stood back, hair-straighteners still in her hand.

  The soft, shiny curls of her blonde hair brushed her shoulders. Her make-up was better than anything she would have achieved herself. She was wearing the pretty dress they had found the other evening—a lace over silk number that was a shade of blue darker than her eye colour.

  With the simple bunch of daisies waiting downstairs for her, her look would be complete—and perfect for an understated registry office wedding.

  Their timing was perfect, too. They’d both managed to leave work in time to get ready at home and they still had almost thirty minutes to drive to Edinburgh and find a parking space in the central city. It was getting tight but, even if parking was difficult, they wouldn’t be more than a few minutes late and that was traditional for brides, wasn’t it?

  This was it.

  Her wedding day.

  Kate met Georgia’s gaze in the mirror.

  ‘I can’t do it.’

  Georgia grinned. ‘Uh-oh...pre-wedding nerves. I’ll get you a glass of wine or something.’

  The new curls tickled her neck as Kate shook her head slowly.

  ‘No. Wine won’t make any difference. This isn’t nerves. I just can’t do it.’

  ‘What...you don’t want to marry Luke any more?’

  Kate shook her head again. ‘It’s not that either. I do want to marry Luke. More than anything. But I can’t do it like this.’

  ‘Like what? You mean the registry office thing?’ Georgie pulled the plug from the wall but kept the hair-straighteners in her hand as she sank onto the side of Kate’s bed. ‘I was right. You want the meringue dress and rose petals.’

  Kate was beginning to feel like a puppet, repeating her headshake yet again. Her limbs felt heavy as well—as if she wouldn’t be able to move unless someone pulled the right strings.

  ‘I can’t marry someone I’m deceiving like this.’

  Georgia glanced at her watch, biting her bottom lip. ‘So...what do you want to do? Just not show up?’

  And jilt the man she loved?

  ‘No, of course not.’

  ‘You want to text Luke and tell him you’re not coming?’

  ‘I can’t do something like that in a text message.’

  ‘Phone him?’

  ‘I don’t know.’ Kate pressed a hand to her mouth. ‘I don’t know what to do, Georgie. I just know that this feels wrong.’

  ‘Okay.’ Georgia got to her feet with the kind of calm that only someone used to dealing with emergency situations could display. ‘Here’s what we’ll do. We’ll get in the car and drive to Edinburgh. You can talk to me on the way. If you still feel the same way when we get there, you can ring Luke. Or talk to him face to face.’

  Face to face.

  Yes...that would be the brave thing to do. The honest thing.

  And Luke deserved her honesty at the very least.

  It was good that Georgia was pulling her strings. Kate got to her feet and went downstairs. She walked past the bunch of daisies and headed for the car. She heard the door slam behind her and then Georgia got into the driver’s seat. She handed Kate the bunch of daisies.

  ‘Just in case,’ she murmured. Once out of the driveway, she put her foot down.

  ‘We haven’t got a siren on,’ Kate said. ‘Take it easy.’

  ‘Sorry...’ Georgia slowed the car a little. ‘It’s the tension.’

  ‘No... I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have let it get to this. But I didn’t know how important it would suddenly seem. I’ve been living a lie.’ It was all becoming clear in her head as the words started tumbling out. ‘It was so important to Luke that our relationship be based on that stupid pact. That we would both be very clear about exactly how we felt about each other because we wouldn’t be blinded by being in love. And I’ve let him believe that I was in the same place. I pretty much promised him that I hadn’t fallen in love with him.’

  ‘Maybe he won’t mind,’ Georgia said. ‘He loves you. He told you that he loves you.’

  ‘Yes, but not like that. It’s like when I tell you that I love you.’

  ‘You haven’t told me that in a long time.’ Georgia turned her head to smile at Kate. ‘Do you love me?’

  ‘Of course I do. But I’m not in love with you.’

  ‘Thank goodness for that. We’ve got enough complications.’ But Georgia was still smiling as she negotiated a turn that would take them towards the registry office. ‘I love you, too.’

  They drove in silence after that. The traffic was heavy and it was taking longer than it should. They were going to be late.

  ‘Oh, look...there’s a parking space. Almost right outside the registry office. It’s a miracle.’

  A minute later and they were parked. The engine of the car had been turned off. And Georgia was waiting quietly.

  ‘So, what now? Do you want to ring Luke? Or go and find him and talk to him?’

  Kate’s heart was hammering. Her phone was shaking in her hand. ‘I can’t ring. But if I go in there, he’ll think I’ve come to marry him. Walking in there and saying I can’t do it is almost as bad as not turning up at all.’

  What if she walked in there and saw him waiting for her? Would he be looking impossibly gorgeous in a suit and tie, despite what he’d said about clothes being unimportant? He’d be smiling, wouldn’t he? Maybe looking at her the way he had when he’d been holding her in his arms up there in the castle whose walls dominated the top of the road they were parked on.

  In the face of that kind of tenderness, hope even, she might well lose the courage she was summoning to be honest.

  Georgia looked at her watch. ‘It’s nearly a quarter past two. We have to do something.’ She drummed her fingers on the steering wheel. ‘How ’bout I go in? That way he’ll have a warning that something’s up. And I can tell him that you need to talk to him. And then I’ll show him where we’re parked and stay out of your way for a while.’

  She didn’t wait for Kate’s response. She was already easing her expanding belly past the steering wheel and out of the car.

  Kate watched her disappear up the steps that led into the building further up the street.

  And then she waited.

  She closed her eyes and tried not to think of the expression that might be on Luke’s face when he came to get into the car and talk to her.

  How disappointed he was going to be when she told him the truth.

  But she was doing the right thing.

  Luke trusted her enough to be prepared to make a public commitment to spend the rest of his
life with her. Maybe—and this was a glimmer of hope she couldn’t quite extinguish—Georgia was right and he wouldn’t mind. He might even laugh off the idea that she’d fallen in love with him and tell her that she’d get over it one day. He might actually want to go through with the ceremony but he deserved the option of changing his mind.

  Kate couldn’t change hers. She would never get over being in love with him.

  Minutes ticked past as her thoughts whirled and settled, getting a little more despondent with each circuit. She was holding the bunch of daisies in her hand so tightly they seemed to be wilting right before her eyes.

  Like her dreams of the future...?

  With her eyes downcast, focussed on the flowers, she didn’t see the person approaching the car. The door being wrenched opened made her jump.

  And then her heart sank like a stone.

  ‘What happened? He...he doesn’t even want to talk to me?’

  Georgia shook her head. ‘He’s not there, Kate.’

  ‘What? He didn’t even wait for fifteen minutes...?’

  Georgia shook her head again. ‘It’s not that.’ She reached out to touch Kate’s hand. ‘I’m sorry...but apparently he didn’t turn up at all.’

  CHAPTER TEN

  ‘WHAT ARE YOU DOING?’

  ‘Calling the hospital. I reckon he got caught up in some emergency. That’ll be why his phone’s going to voicemail.’ Georgia held her phone to her ear. ‘Hello. This is Georgia Bennett from the Outer Edinburgh Ambulance Service. Could you put me through to Dr Luke Anderson, please?’

  The seconds ticked past. Kate could feel her heart thudding along with them. She leaned back against the headrest and closed her eyes. This turn of events was something she would never have expected and she wasn’t at all sure how to deal with it.

  She could hear the crackle of a voice coming back onto the other end of the line.

  ‘Okay,’ Georgia said, finally. ‘Thank you. No, no message.’

  She turned back to Kate who still had her eyes closed.

  ‘The operator said he’s unavailable for the rest of the day. On personal leave.’

  Kate opened her eyes. She looked past the buildings around them. Up towards the walls of the castle.