Through The Woods

by Myers, Shannon

  Back when Luck ran things, the Hell’s Horsemen MC had been an equal partner, an ally. Then, they’d up and disappeared not long after I took over. However, word on the street lately was that they’d made some bad deals and were looking to work with another MC.

  Money I had. Well, at least enough to keep my club.

  What I needed were numbers.

  Shit like this didn’t just happen.

  I felt like she was behind it all.

  I pushed thoughts of her aside and focused on what was important. Working with Blade’s club.

  It was time for Scarred Savages to rise up again.

  Chapter Eight

  There was a light tap on my shoulder, but I rolled away from it.

  “No. Five more minutes.”

  The tap came again and I reluctantly opened my eyes to see Joker standing at the side of my bed. He brought his hand up and tapped it against his lips.

  Food.

  I’d been so tired after cleaning and cooking, that I left the men to it and came upstairs to crash. I couldn’t even think about food after the things that I’d encountered in their rooms.

  I rubbed my eyes and pushed myself up into a sitting position. There was still enough early evening light coming in that I didn’t need to turn on a lamp. Joker smiled pleasantly at me before bending down to retrieve a small tray containing a cup of broth and some crackers.

  I must’ve been moving up in the world if Charm was allowing me to have crackers. I held my hand to my mouth and brought it down to the open palm of my other hand, thanking him for bringing it up to me.

  He set the tray down and shook his head before signing ‘thank you’ to me. Sensing my confusion. He held his left hand up and quickly swiped his right hand across it three times.

  Cleaning.

  He was thanking me for cleaning.

  I wanted to hug him in that moment—never mind that I’d come very close to being violently ill while cleaning his room. His face reflected nothing but gratitude and it touched me.

  His eyes moved down and widened in alarm and I followed his gaze, realizing that my stitches must’ve reopened at some point while I was sleeping. Blood soaked through my shirt and into the sheets.

  Joker held his hand up and ran out before I could convince him that I was okay, returning with Doc a few moments later.

  “Let’s see what’s happened.” He removed the bandages and cursed. “I told him it was too much for you.”

  I placed my hand on his arm. “I’m peachy. I can handle it.”

  Joker shook his head and left the room again. This time he came back with Charm in tow. I groaned and placed my head in my hands. “I said I was okay.”

  Doc pressed against my side and I yelped. “Yeah, you sound like you’re well on your way to being fully recovered, Neve.”

  Charm moved around the bed and leaned over Doc’s shoulder to get a better look, leaving me feeling extremely exposed with him standing inches away, breathing on me.

  Doc pointed down at something. “See that? The stitches tore away. And this is worrying.” He dug his finger in again and I bit down on my lip to keep from crying out.

  Charm reached out and touched the skin around the wound. “It’s infected.”

  I took a deep breath. “I—I’m perfectly fine. I just need to sleep and I’ll be good as new by tomorrow.”

  Both men gave me incredulous looks as Joker shook his head near the foot of the bed, obviously in agreement with them.

  “Neve, your body isn’t healing as well as it should. I’d like to take you downstairs and get you started on some IV antibiotics…drain it and then stitch everything back up.”

  I tried to sit up, but Charm pushed my shoulders back down on the bed. “Will I have to be tied down again? I don’t want to stay down there. Please.” He couldn’t know, but being down in the basement alone wasn’t exactly high up on my list of experiences to repeat.

  One night I’d dreamt that Clint came through the door. I’d woken up with my throat on fire, half convinced that I’d been choked again. My body shuddered at the memory.

  Charm looked over at Doc. “Why don’t we bring it up here. She’s obviously not in any shape to make the trip downstairs again.”

  Doc nodded and looked over at Joker. “Can you help me get what I need?” Joker nodded happily and gave me a thumb’s up on his way out.

  Once the men left, Charm looked back down at me. “Is there anyone you need to get in touch with?”

  I thought about it. The cell phone I had before coming here only worked when we’d paid the internet bill. It didn’t have a data plan or anything; just wi-fi only. Even if I did have it, there was no one. No one who would miss my presence—no one who would worry over my disappearance.

  I laughed weakly, shaking off the negative thoughts. “It’s just a little infection. I’m not dying, man.”

  Charm’s jaw ticked and he held my gaze for a moment longer than necessary. “Then you shouldn’t have any trouble holding up your end of the bargain.”

  He looked like he wanted to say more, but instead, stalked out of the room.

  I sighed and leaned back against the pillows. I probably should’ve milked this long enough to get out of cooking and cleaning—at least for tomorrow, but there was something about Charm.

  I knew he expected me to fail—to relapse and ruin everything. Something about knowing that made me want to prove him wrong.

  I wanted him to have to eat his words.

  I needed him to...because I didn’t have a plan B. This had to work out until I could figure out what to do with my life.

  Obviously, going back to Clint was not an option. And my parents...I couldn’t think about that right now.

  I was going to have to make this biker my friend.

  End of story.

  I woke with a start, my body coated in a fine sheen of sweat and I couldn’t tell if it was the sound of motorcycles or the nightmare that had pulled me back to consciousness. I lay still and listened as the rumble from the bikes gradually faded into white noise.

  I wanted to go back to sleep, but my mind was restless.

  I couldn’t stay cooped up in this room, regardless of what Doc recommended. The IV tubing ran from my hand up to an almost empty bag. Trying not to cause any damage, I pulled off the tape and gently removed the needle, before slipping out of bed.

  I pulled on the sweatshirt that Charm had loaned me the day before and my shoes before creeping silently down the hallway. I felt like a felon breaking out of prison, alternating between elation to be out of my room and an intense fear of being discovered.

  Once outside, I leaned against the side of the lodge and breathed a sigh of relief. The crickets chirped, but otherwise, everything remained still. I realized three steps into my journey that I didn’t have a flashlight or any way of knowing if I was headed in the correct direction.

  I kept picturing myself reaching the stone ledge and walking right off of it because I was flying blind.

  Just in case, I kept my hands outstretched in front of me as I continued taking cautious steps forward. Just when I was convinced that I was going in the wrong direction, I saw a small light glowing up ahead. I took another couple of steps forward and the light swung around in my direction. It was the glowing ember from a cigarette. I tried to back away, but the person moved too quickly.

  “Running away already?”

  I didn’t recognize the voice, but refused to cower. I held my chin high, even though I knew that he couldn’t see me. “I needed some fresh air.”

  The ember bobbed up and down as the man nodded. “Get that way sometimes myself. Twitch.” A hand bumped mine and I instinctively shook it.

  “Neve.”

  “Heard a lot about you—got Charm all twisted, that’s for sure.” He laughed as he said it, even as I cringed. I guess it was no secret that their Prez was not a big fan of mine.

  I sighed. “Yeah. In my defense, I never asked to be rescued though.”

  Twit
ch laughed again before blowing out a ring of smoke that was just becoming visible in the early morning light. “You’re alright with me, kid.” He gestured back toward the ledge. “Care to sit?”

  I was going to decline when I realized that I had nowhere else to go. “Sure.”

  He took my hand and led me up onto the rock where we sat quietly, waiting on the sun to make an appearance.

  “Do you come out here often?”

  He took another slow drag before replying. “Every once in a while. Seeing the sun rise—it’s a nice reminder.”

  The sky lightened a little more and I could see that his hands were trembling. I pressed. “A reminder of what?”

  He looked out over the ledge. “That you made it. You get another chance—a chance to do things right.”

  I was taken aback. His response was unexpected, to say the least. “You’ve made a lot of mistakes?”

  Twitch stubbed the cigarette out on the sole of his boot before tossing it into a small metal bucket near the corner of the ledge. He caught my stare. “Fires. If you’re gonna light up, make sure to throw the butts into one of these metal bins or else the whole fucking forest’ll go up.”

  I nodded and waited for him to elaborate on his cryptic ‘second chance’ message, while also appreciating his Smokey Bear mindset. He went back to staring off into the distance though, so I cleared my throat. “Um, have you made a lot of mistakes?”

  He blinked and then looked back over, as if just remembering I was still here. “Kid, you and me? We’re cut from the same cloth. The greatest enemy we’ll ever face is ourselves—” He stopped talking and eyed me closer before amending, “Well, most of the time our greatest enemy is staring at us in the mirror.”

  It hit too close to home, leaving me defensive. “How are we the same?”

  He gestured between us. “Kid, a user can spot another user from a mile away. It’s like a fucking neon sign flashing over your head.”

  I mulled over his words while chewing on my lower lip. To be honest, his words stung a bit. I knew that I hadn’t even been sober a full week, but I really felt like I already looked different—healthier.

  Twitch reached over and patted my hand gently. “Don’t take it personally, kid. I’ve fallen off the wagon more times than I can count. What matters is that I’ve woken up the morning after, watched the sunrise, and got my ass back on it.”

  I shook my head confidently, even as my teeth continued to work on my lip. “I’m not going to fall off. That’s not an option for me.”

  He laughed so hard that he had to lean over and clutch his thighs. “That’s a good one, kid. Jesus, you almost had me goin’ for a second there. I hope, for your sake, that you’re right. You better be prepared for when the shit hits the fan though.”

  I shook my head again, and reiterated, this time with a little more anger. “No. I refuse to fail. He’s expecting that. I’m going to prove him…and you wrong.”

  He pulled the pack of cigarettes from his pocket and lit up another one before offering the pack to me. I shook my head and he took a couple of drags before responding. “Who’s expecting you to fail? And what was your poison? That’s telling, you know.”

  I pulled the sleeves of the sweatshirt down until they covered my hands, stalling. I hadn’t meant to tell him about my plan to prove Charm wrong. “Uh…it was coke.”

  He nodded slowly. “And the man expecting you to fail?”

  “Charm. He doesn’t want me here, but I don’t have anywhere else to go. I have to make this work. My boyf—well, ex-boyfriend tried to kill me and my parents are—” My words were cut off by a strangled sob and it took me a minute to regain my composure. “I—I need this to work.”

  The sun began to rise and conversation between the two of us stopped momentarily. I focused all of my energy on the pink and purple sky; closing my eyes briefly as the sun crested, blinding me.

  Twitch took my hand in his and my eyes fluttered open. “Have you taken the time to work through those emotions while sober, kid?”

  I blinked against the tears and looked away, but he persisted. “If you’re set on proving the asshole wrong and not relapsing, you need to take the time to properly grieve your dead. Work through the shit, so you can move on.”

  He was right.

  I knew it.

  I just couldn’t bear to think of that night.

  Chapter Nine

  One week later…

  I waited until the last of the motorcycles faded from view. They were gone for the day, leaving me to complete my chores in peace. My side appeared to be healing the way Doc wanted and I’d been given the okay to resume cooking and cleaning.

  Charm always left two prospects behind to guard the clubhouse while also watching me closely, as if I was in any sort of shape to run away. Axel was nice enough; the other guy hadn’t spoken a word to me since I arrived and responded to any of my questions with grunts.

  Once I was sure that the two of them were preoccupied with biker things, I pulled my hair back into a high ponytail and threw on what was quickly becoming my favorite outfit— Charm’s sweatshirt and a pair of black sweatpants. I couldn’t seem to stay warm even though it was the middle of July. I just didn’t have enough body-fat, no matter how much broth and Ensure I drank.

  Doc had assured me that I would put weight back on in time; I’d just been hopeful that it would’ve been a faster process.

  I hurriedly cleaned the rooms, finding that I didn’t need to pause for breaks as often. As often—meaning that these men were surprisingly still capable of destroying bedrooms and bathrooms in less than twenty-four hours.

  Amongst the mound of tissues on the dresser in PD’s room, were several condom wrappers and I stared in confusion at them for far longer than was necessary.

  “There are no women here!” I exclaimed with a small giggle. “But, at least we’re all practicing safe sex.”

  I had to be losing my head. Charm had specifically stated that they weren’t that kind of club, hadn’t he?

  Did the whores just show up on specific nights?

  I tried not to dwell on the fact that I would’ve heard someone having sex from down the hall and pushed on until I got to Charm’s room.

  I’d sworn I wouldn’t look again, but after a cursory sweep with the duster, I found myself digging through the top drawer of his nightstand and sinking down to the carpet, needing answers.

  Matt’s old man broke his arm today. Then, he took him out to one of the cabins back in the woods and left him there. Said he could come back when he learned how to use his voice, like a man. Us kids were told to not even think about helping him get food or water either.

  She came to me in the middle of the night, shining a small flashlight in my face. “We can’t leave him to die out there. You and I both know that he ain’t ever gonna be able to talk.”

  I tried to tell her all the reasons we couldn’t when she said, “Please. We already lost Bones. I can’t lose Matty too.”

  I hadn’t been able to tell her about what really happened to Bones. Instead, I told her that he got off his rope and ran away. She still looked for him every day and often sighed that she hoped someone nice had found him.

  I knew she was right, so we waited until the bikers left the next day before hitching a ride into town for supplies. As usual, the other guys caught up with us when they figured out our plan. She disappeared while we snagged food and water, but showed back up when it was time to leave.

  By the time we got out to him, Matt was rocking in a corner, his broken arm clutched to his chest. Sweat ran down his face even though the room was freezing. Vic felt his head and nodded. “He’s got a fever—probably from infection. I’m going to have to reset the bones.”

  Most kids wouldn’t have known the first thing about fixing broken bones. Most kids weren’t us though.

  Vic set it while AJ and I held him down.

  If ever there was a time for Matt to speak, it would’ve been now. His mouth fell open and he t
ried to fight us, but no sound came out. I knew then that it wasn’t a matter of him not wanting to talk. His voice just didn’t work. Eventually, he passed out from the pain and Vic got it done.

  Rocky showed up with a syringe and proceeded to inject antibiotics into him after disinfecting the skin around his hip. “What? I’ve seen my ma shoot up hundreds of times,” he’d explained as we all stared at him in awe.

  Vic stepped back and looked Matt over. “I wrapped it the best I could, but his arm isn’t going to be perfect. He went too long with it broken.”

  Bobby and Billy carried him over to an old bed in the corner and wrapped him in blankets. I thought we were ready to leave him for a little while when she went over and sat next to him, patting his hair until his eyes opened.

  “Matty, I got us another book at the library. You wanna read it with me?”

  He nodded, but winced when he tried to move. We could’ve stolen pain medicine, but they would’ve found us out for sure then. She climbed under the blankets and opened to the first page.

  “Today, we’re going to do an easy one. Thank you.” She put one hand up to her mouth and then down to rest on the palm of her other hand. “Now, don’t use your bad arm. Just do what you can.”

  He did exactly as she showed him as we all stood along the wall like some dummies. She’d been teaching him sign language. While we’d all been fine with messages scribbled in the dirt or written on scraps of paper, she’d wanted him to communicate with us.

  “Now, don’t y’all go running off. I’m gonna teach you next.”

  It was stupid, but I wanted to do whatever she needed. She kept us all together and made things seem okay.

  I brought my hand to my mouth to stifle my sobs. While I was still no closer to finding out the woman’s identity, I now knew one of the men’s identities.

  Joker was Matt—it had to be. I wasn’t sure how I’d missed it before. I’d wondered how someone who lived like he did had learned sign language. It was the elusive she.