by Linda Sole
‘Yes, I shall. It doesn’t matter about Philip, Julia. We’ll have each other and the children.’
‘And you have Harry.’
‘Yes, I have Harry.’
Roz stood up and went to the window. ‘It has started to snow. I think Harry and I should leave before it comes down too hard. I’ll come and see you when I can after Christmas.’
Roz was fighting the urge to weep. She had much more than Julia to look forward to; why then was she so desperately unhappy?
Fifteen
Attending church on Christmas morning with her husband and mother, Roz noticed that Tom Blake’s wife and mother were in the congregation, though he was absent and so was Philip.
‘I know Julia isn’t well enough to attend,’ Lady Thornton whispered to her as they took their places, ‘but Philip ought to have made the effort. It’s too bad of him, Roz. He should set an example.’
‘Philip seems not to care what people think of him.’
Lady Thornton gave her a hard stare but Roz refused to enlarge on her statement. As the service began a few seconds later the conversation was forgotten and it was not until they left the church that Roz knew anything was wrong. She exchanged a few words with neighbours and was about to enter her husband’s carriage when one of Philip’s grooms came forward.
‘May I speak to you, Mrs Rushden?’
‘Yes, of course. Is something the matter?’
‘The master sent me. He said to tell you that the mistress is ill and wishes to see you.’
‘Julia is ill?’ Roz stared at him in concern. ‘Is the doctor with her?’
‘He was sent for after her fall, Mrs Rushden.’
‘Julia had a fall?’
‘She fell downstairs this morning. She was in terrible pain and the master sent for the doctor straight off.’
‘Is something wrong, Roz?’ Harry had stopped to speak to a friend. ‘What does this fellow want?’
‘Julia has had an accident. We must go there immediately, Harry. She has fallen down the stairs. The doctor told her she ought not to get up but Philip wanted her to go down because they had guests.’
‘Damned fool,’ Harry muttered. ‘I suppose you want to visit her, Roz?’
‘Yes, I must. I’m afraid she may lose the child. It is all Philip’s fault.’
‘Roz!’ Lady Thornton looked at her angrily. ‘You should not blame your brother. Whatever has happened it was clearly an accident.’
‘I’m not saying Philip pushed her but he should not have made her get up when the doctor said she must rest.’
‘You are too ready to blame your brother.’
Roz bit back a hasty retort. Lady Thornton would not listen to criticism from Roz. Goodness knows what she would think if Roz implied that not only was Julia’s accident entirely Philip’s fault, he was also a murderer.
Following her mother into the carriage, Roz was silent as they were driven to the hall. Her brother deserved to be punished for his lack of consideration for others but Roz could never do anything that would hurt Julia more than she’d already been hurt.
There was a hush over the house as Roz and the others walked in a few minutes later. The housekeeper came hurrying towards them, her face grave.
‘How is my daughter-in-law?’ Lady Thornton asked. ‘How did she come to fall down the stairs – the silly girl.’
‘She turned dizzy, ma’am.’
‘I shall go up and see her at once.’
‘The doctor is with her, madam.’ She hesitated and then looked at Roz. ‘The mistress was calling for you, Mrs Rushden. The doctor said you were to go up as soon as you arrived.’
Roz glanced at her mother. ‘Perhaps you should wait for a while, Mama? The doctor will not wish for two of us at once.’
‘Very well.’ Lady Thornton looked annoyed. ‘I should like a cup of tea.’
‘Yes, my lady. The guests left soon after the accident happened and the master went out as soon as the doctor arrived.’
‘Philip left Julia alone?’
Roz was shocked. Philip was callous but this was beyond anything. Seeing confirmation in the housekeeper’s eyes, Roz went hurriedly from the room. Had Philip walked in at that moment she would have struck him.
Approaching Julia’s bedchamber she heard the sobbing cries and her heart caught. It sounded as if her worst fears were coming true.
As she entered the bedchamber she saw the doctor and a midwife bending over Julia as she screamed and writhed. Then the midwife drew something away from her and looked down at the child’s body. It was very tiny and looked blue. She shook her head and turned away, wrapping the lifeless body in some clean linen.
‘No!’ Julia wailed. ‘My baby. Give me my baby.’
‘She is dead. It’s best you don’t see her.’
‘Please, I want to see her.’
‘Let her see the child,’ Roz said and took the bundle from the midwife. Opening it, she was shocked to see how tiny the child was and yet she was perfect in every way other than her colour. ‘Here she is, Julia.’
Roz placed the bundle in Julia’s arms and sat beside her on the edge of the bed.
‘She is lovely,’ Julia sobbed. ‘I thought there was something wrong with her.’
‘She was born too soon; otherwise she was perfectly normal,’ the doctor told her. He had finished his work and turned away to wash his hands. ‘In time you may have another child, Lady Julia, but next time perhaps you will take my advice and stay in bed.’
‘It wasn’t Julia’s idea to get up,’ Roz said, defending her. ‘She was asked to go down. Philip should have known better.’
‘Where is he?’ Julia asked, tears slipping down her cheeks. ‘He should be here to see her.’ She kissed the child’s face. ‘My poor little girl.’
‘I am so sorry, dearest. You must rest now and Philip will come soon. I should have been here sooner had I known but we were not told until we left church.’
‘I’m so glad you were here. I didn’t mean to kill my baby, Roz. I just missed my step and turned dizzy.’
‘Philip should never have asked you to get up.’ Roz stroked her hair. ‘Please don’t blame yourself, Julia. It wasn’t your fault.’
‘I should have stayed in bed, as you told me.’ Julia gave the child back to Roz, who returned her to the midwife, who took her out of the room. ‘She should have a name. I’ll call her Rosemary.’
‘Yes, she was like a little rosebud,’ Roz agreed and held her hand. ‘Try to rest now, Julia. You need to sleep.’
‘I shall give you something to help,’ the doctor said. ‘In the morning you will feel better.’
Julia moved her head negatively on the pillow. Her fingers closed about Roz’s hand. ‘Stay with me, please? I know it’s Christmas Day and I’ve ruined your celebrations, but please – just until I fall asleep.’
‘Yes, of course,’ Roz said. ‘Harry and Mama are here. Do you want to see Mama?’
‘No. I don’t want to see anyone but you, Roz.’
‘Then I shall send them home and stay with you for a few days,’ Roz told her. ‘Take the sleeping draught, Julia. I shall sit here with you while you rest.’
‘Thank you.’ Julia smiled and took the small glass offered her, swallowing the liquid obediently. She lay back with a sigh and closed her eyes.
‘I should be glad if you would stay with her for a day or so,’ the doctor told Roz. ‘She is strong and her body will recover but she needs rest and care.’
‘I intend to stay. Would you ask my husband to step up when you go down, sir?’
‘Yes, of course. It is nice to see you looking so well, Mrs Rushden. You mustn’t tire yourself. Allow the servants to look after Lady Julia. All she needs from you is friendship and a little kindness.’
‘Do not be anxious, sir. I shall not put my child at risk.’
Julia was sleeping when Harry entered. Roz put a finger to her lips and he nodded.
‘Will you take Mama home and look after her, please
? Julia doesn’t want her fussing over her yet.’
‘You are asking me to leave you alone here?’
‘The house is full of servants, Harry. Besides, Philip has gone off somewhere. If he comes back and quarrels with me I shall summon the servants.’
‘I’ll leave one of the grooms here with orders to protect you,’ Harry said. ‘As soon as your mother is settled I’ll come back.’
‘I’m going to stay for a day or so.’
‘I’m not sure that is a good idea.’
‘Julia needs me.’
‘In that case I’ll find Philip and warn him to stay away. If he lays a finger on you I’ll kill him.’
‘Be careful, Harry. My brother is violent.’
‘All the more reason that I should see him before he gets a chance to see you or Julia.’
‘Thank you.’
Roz smiled at him and he went out. She found a comfortable chair by the window where she could look out and still watch over Julia.
Tears trickled down her cheeks. It was so sad that Julia should lose the child she had longed for. A miscarriage was always an unhappy occurrence but Julia had wanted her baby so badly.
‘Damn you, Philip. If it wasn’t for Julia I’d . . .’
What could she do? She was certain that her brother had been the father of Carrie Blake’s child – and that he had killed her and taken her body to where it was found – but she had no proof.
‘If there were any justice it would be you suffering not Julia,’ she murmured. ‘I hope either Harry or Tom do thrash you.’
Tom couldn’t believe it when he saw Philip Thornton near the hay barn. He had dismounted and tied up his horse and was staring at the spot where Carrie’s body had lain. Incensed, Tom strode towards him, red-hot anger working through him.
‘What do you want?’ he demanded. ‘This is my land and you’re trespassing.’
‘Damned upstart,’ Philip muttered but his voice was slurred. ‘Who the hell do you think you’re talking to?’
‘Do you really want to know?’ Tom glared at him. ‘Well, I’ll tell you. I think you are a filthy rotten swine. You gave Carrie her baby and told her to blame it on your father – and then you killed her. You killed her somewhere else and dumped her body here. If I could prove it I should see you hang.’
‘Bloody farmer,’ Philip muttered and swung out with his right fist. ‘Got above yourself. Deserve to be taught who the master is here.’
Tom dodged the blow easily, holding on to his temper by a thread. ‘Go home, Thornton. You’re too drunk to pick a quarrel with me.’
‘I’ll teach you . . .’ Philip raised his arm and tried to hit him with his riding crop but Tom caught his wrist. ‘Bloody cheap little bitch. She deserved what she got.’
‘You devil.’ Tom forgot caution. His fist connected with Philip’s chin three times in quick succession. Philip went down under the flurry of blows and Tom kicked him in the ribs twice. ‘I ought to kill you but you’re not worth it. You’re scum, Philip Thornton. You weren’t fit to lick her boots. Come near me again and I shall kill you.’
Turning away, Tom left him lying on the ground. His knuckles were sore and bleeding and he was breathing hard.
It was early in the evening when Harry entered Julia’s bedchamber again. Roz was drinking a cup of tea the housekeeper had brought up for her.
‘How is she?’
‘She woke for a moment or two and then went back to sleep. She knew I was here and smiled.’
‘You promise not to tire yourself?’
‘I shall do nothing to endanger my health. I don’t want to lose our child, Harry.’
‘Your mother is staying with me until you come home and then she will stay with Julia.’
‘That rather depends on Philip. Have you seen him?’
‘No. I had a ride round the estate but there was no sign of him. He may have taken himself off to Wisbech to stay with his friends.’
‘I hope you are right. I don’t want him to come back and upset Julia.’
‘It is a pity she married him. Your brother is rotten to the core.’
‘Yes, he is. I pray that he stays away for a few days to give Julia a chance to recover.’
Harry gave her an odd look. ‘I’ll second that. Anyway, I’ve told my groom to sit outside your room all night and wake the household if he tries to get to you or Julia.’
‘I’m sure we shall be safe enough.’
‘I’m pretty certain he’s in Wisbech with his friends. You needn’t lose sleep over it, Roz.’
She stood up and went to kiss him. ‘I’m sorry I haven’t been with you today. Your present is in my room on the dressing table.’
‘We’ll celebrate when you feel Julia is well enough to leave.’
‘You’re so good to me.’
Harry moved away from her, looking slightly uncomfortable. ‘I’ll see you tomorrow, Roz. Please get some rest yourself.’
‘Julia’s maid is going to take my place so that I can sleep later. I’m being well looked after.’
‘Yes, I am sure you are. This was your home. I’ll get back to your mother before she starts to fret . . .’ At the door he turned back to look at her. ‘Do not worry, Roz, I am sure this will all turn out well in the end.’
‘I wish I could think it. Julia wanted that baby, and even if she could have another . . .’ She shook her head. ‘Damn Philip. I hate him, Harry. I wish he would die.’
‘Do you really mean that?’
‘I’m not asking you to kill him – but I should be happy if he had an accident and broke his neck.’
‘Well, the way he’s been drinking recently . . .’ Harry smiled wryly. ‘No one would mind too much – except your mother. She seems to think he is everything he ought to be.’
‘Only because she doesn’t like to face the truth. In her heart she knows what he is.’
‘Yes, I dare say she does.’ He inclined his head and went out.
Roz looked at the bed. Julia was still sleeping. She was the one person who might miss Philip, because she loved him despite all he had done to her.
‘What is wrong with your hand?’
‘Nothing,’ Tom said and frowned as he glanced at the knuckles. ‘I grazed my hand when I was mending something.’
‘Let me look,’ she insisted and grabbed his hand as he would have turned away. ‘Grazed it? It looks as if you’ve been in a fight.’
‘Look at my face, Ma. Do I look as if I’ve been fighting?’
‘No . . .’ Ellen shook her head. ‘Dick used to come home with bruises all over him – but that hand looks more like a fight than a graze.’
‘Well, it isn’t and if it were it’s finished. Stop fussing, Ma. Where is Mary Jane?’
‘She went out earlier. I thought she must’ve gone to visit her mother.’ Ellen looked at the mantle clock. ‘It’s getting late, Tom. Do you think perhaps you should go and look for her?’
‘Damn,’ Tom said and plunged his hand into a bowl of cold water. ‘Don’t tell me she’s started running off the way Carrie did, Ma?’
‘Not as often but she has been out for a couple of hours or so once or twice recently.’
‘You should’ve told me. I’ll have a word with her – leaving you with all the work to do on Christmas Day.’
‘She helped me prepare the food earlier then said she was . . .’ Ellen broke off as the kitchen door opened and Mary Jane walked in. Her hair was windblown and her cheeks were red from the cold but her eyes were bright. ‘We were just starting to worry, lass.’
‘Sorry I’m late, Ma.’ Mary Jane went to the sink to wash her hands. ‘Is dinner ready yet? I’m starving. I’ve not eaten since breakfast.’
‘Did your mother not give you anything?’
‘Oh, I had a piece of cake. But I wanted to wait for your dinner because you’re a better cook than Ma.’
‘Well, help me get the goose up then, lass,’ Ellen said. ‘Sit down at the table, Tom – unless you want a dressing on
that hand first.’
‘It’s all right,’ Tom said. ‘Let’s have our dinner and then I’ll give you your presents.’
Roz wondered how Tom Blake and his family were spending Christmas Day. She knew that the work never stopped for small farmers. There was always the milking to do and the animals to care for, but at the end of the day they must surely have time to celebrate.
It was ridiculous to let herself think about him. She could never be with him, never share the same bed – or make love to him whenever she wanted.
Her thoughts were suspended as the door opened and Julia’s maid Alice entered.
‘You should rest now, Mrs Rushden. You’ve sat here all day.’
‘Yes, I need to sleep for a while,’ Roz agreed. ‘If Julia wakes and asks for me you must wake me.’
‘Yes. I’ll call you if you’re needed.’
Roz got to her feet. ‘Has my brother come home yet?’
‘No, Mrs Rushden.’ Alice hesitated, then: ‘He often stays out for a whole night – sometimes more.’
‘It is not well done of him,’ Roz said. ‘Remember I’m not far away and ready to come if she needs me.’
Leaving the room, Roz went to the chamber that had been hers as a girl. Julia had left things much as they always were because she’d said Roz was always welcome to visit.
It seemed strange going to bed in this house. Roz thought about her husband, sighing as she realized that she was quite happy to know that she could be sure of sleeping alone tonight. That wasn’t fair to Harry but Tom had been too much in her thoughts.
Harry would never forgive her if he knew about Tom Blake. She could only pray he never had cause to suspect anything was wrong. If the child had his eyes and hair it would be fine – but what if the babe looked like Tom?
Roz wished she knew who the father was so that she could settle it in her own mind, but she really had no idea.
‘Forgive me,’ she whispered to her unborn babe. ‘I shall love you, whoever you are.’
Locking her bedroom door, Roz undressed and then went to bed. She blew out the candle but it was a while before she slept.
It wasn’t so very strange that Philip should stay out all night since he’d done it before, but she couldn’t help wondering why he hadn’t wanted to know how his wife and child had fared. His selfishness was beyond words.
