Just Friends

by Melody Summers

  “Look out,” Ashton said, his hand going to the small of my back to slide me out of their path so I didn’t get knocked down.

  “Thanks,” I murmured.

  The warmth of his touch seemed to linger far longer than it should, even when I took my seat between him and Delaney. Why did this have to be so weird? We’d gone to movies together before as friends. It should have been totally fine. But instead all I could do was think of the times when we’d gone to the movies on dates before we broke up, and how different that had been.

  Delaney’s broad grin gleamed in the light from the screen as she twisted in her seat towards me. “Isn’t this fun?”

  I was still off on my little trip down Memory Lane. “What?”

  “Double dating, silly.”

  “Oh. Yeah. I guess.”

  She leaned forward so she could peer around me at Ashton then bent to whisper in my ear. “Here’s your perfect opportunity to snuggle up next to Ash.”

  “We’re just friends,” I hissed back.

  “Whatevs, Dani. Keep telling yourself that. Maybe one day you’ll believe it.”

  The movie started, saving me from further argument as Delaney slid over to the other side of her seat to cozy up against Walker. My thoughts swirled restlessly, and though I tried to concentrate on the movie, I was too painfully aware of Ashton sitting mere inches away. Tantalizing hints of his cologne dredged up even more memories of the old days, and whenever I reached for the popcorn I sneaked surreptitious little glances at him. Why did things have to be so complicated? I sighed in frustration and slumped down in my seat.

  “You okay?” Ashton whispered.

  Without meaning to I caught his eyes. The obvious concern there squeezed my heart, but I managed a jerky nod then forced myself to return my attention to the screen, although my thoughts remained far away from the gory scenes taking place there. We were so perfect for each other. It just wasn’t fair. While my friends all thought I’d broken up with him because I’d caught him kissing another girl at a party, the relationship had already ended before that happened. The reality was that his parents didn’t like me because they thought I wasn’t good enough for him, and they had spent the last year we were a couple making our lives miserable in endless attempts to break us up. Poor Ashton had been hopelessly torn between trying to make his parents happy and keeping me as his girlfriend. But it simply wasn’t possible for him to do both, and in the end I’d let him go so he wouldn’t have to choose between us.

  By the time the movie was halfway over I didn’t have the slightest clue what was going on, other than that the body count was steadily piling up in various disturbing ways. I was too busy reliving our breakup at the end of my freshman year.

  Ashton had found me one morning before school and dragged me away from my friends to a quiet spot by the cafeteria doors. From the look on his face I’d known right away that something was wrong.

  “What happened?” I asked.

  “Mom took my cell phone and made me give her my password.”

  “Uh, oh.”

  “Yeah. She read all of our texts before she made me delete them. Then she made me block your number.”

  My heart sank. “Seriously?”

  He nodded. “Then she and Dad told me that I can’t see you outside of school anymore, and that if I keep on I’m going to lose my phone for good. And the car.”

  “I’m sorry, Ash. They must really hate me.”

  “It isn’t you. Not really. It’s...”

  “My parents. I know. They’re not as successful as yours.”

  Heaving a sigh, Ashton ran his fingers through his hair in frustration. “It’s so stupid. They think I should be going out with someone who has better prospects, whose parents are going to push her to do something with her life.”

  “And I just want to be an artist like my mom.”

  “Yeah. If they’d just get to know you, Dani...”

  “They don’t want to know me. They just want me to go away.”

  “I know.”

  Dejection twisted my insides and my eyes went hot as tears welled up. This wasn’t the first time by a long shot that we’d had a conversation like this. The fact was that his parents weren’t ever going to accept me, and every time they caught us together they got a little harder on Ashton. He’d already been repeatedly grounded and had his phone taken away, and now they were taking it to the next level. I was putting Ashton into an impossible position.

  “We need to talk,” I said.

  “I thought that’s what we were doing.”

  “About us.”

  “What do you mean?”

  “You know they’re not going to quit until they break us up, Ashton. They’re just going to keep making you more and more miserable and do everything they can to stop us from seeing each other. And eventually they’re going to get their way.”

  “They’re just doing what they think is best for me.”

  I glanced down at my feet, unable to look at him. “This isn’t going to work.”

  “Dani...”

  “Either they’ll break us up, or they’ll make it so we never get to see or talk to each other again. Either way, there’s no winning here.”

  “Look, I’ll talk to them. I’ll tell them that I’m not giving you up, no matter what they do.”

  I met his eyes, hope flaring. “You’d do that?”

  “I will do that.”

  Except that in the end it hadn’t happened that way. Ashton simply hadn’t been able to stand up to his parents over me. He wanted to please them, and they had all the power. It was just too much, so a couple of weeks later I broke up with him for real—and broke my heart doing it. We’d agreed to stay friends, but that was all we could ever be until he could face down his parents. Too bad I didn’t believe he’d ever do that.

  Another gruesome murder yanked me out of my reveries, and I shuddered as blood drenched the screen. I really hated these movies. Why in the world had I agreed to this? As I reached for the popcorn my fingers tangled with Ashton’s and the touch sent tingles skittering down my spine. A year had changed absolutely nothing between us. All the old feelings were still there. What was I going to do?

  I jerked my hand back. “Sorry,” I murmured.

  Ashton was grinning at me as though he knew exactly what I was thinking. Which he probably did. His ability to do that hadn’t exactly made it any easier when I’d broken up with him.

  After that I was careful to avoid touching him during the rest of the movie. Dealing with all the old feelings again hurt too much. I promised myself there weren’t going to be any more “dates,” no matter how hard Delaney pushed. When I glanced over at him, Ashton was watching me with a speculative expression. Had he felt it, too? I knew him well enough to be pretty sure he had. Friends. What a joke.

  When the movie was finally over and we’d climbed into the car, Walker turned sideways in his seat to take us all in. “You guys want to get some dinner?”

  Laney uttered a plaintive groan. “I’m so stuffed with popcorn I couldn’t eat another bite.”

  Ashton’s eyes flickered over me. “We could get some coffee.”

  It wasn’t fair. The boy knew my weaknesses too well.

  “Okay,” I agreed.

  Walker started the car. “Sounds good to me. There’s a Starbucks around the corner.”

  The evening was balmy, but a cool breeze was blowing so we decided to sit out on the patio. Every time I looked up I found Ashton watching me with one side of his mouth quirked up in a lopsided smile, his eyes twinkling. The rat was seriously enjoying my obvious discomfiture. I concentrated on my coffee and tried to ignore the constant little touches and smiles Laney and Walker were sharing. It was a painful reminder of what I couldn’t have and wanted so very badly.

  “Dani?” Ashton asked softly.

  When I lifted my head his eyes were dark with concern and a hint of sadness. It wrung my heart just to look at him.

  He glanced at the others, wh
o were too wrapped up in each other to notice us, then silently mouthed the words, “You okay?”

  I gave him a tiny nod and he reached out, his hand covering mine in a gesture that offered nothing but comfort. My breath escaped in a deep sigh and I let him go on holding my hand until Laney and Walker finished their coffee and were ready to go. For some reason, this time it didn’t feel weird at all.

  Chapter Three

  It made me think a lot and reconsider my decision of a year ago. Both Ashton and I wanted to be more than friends, had never truly wanted to break up at all. I’d felt that I had to, but had I been wrong? Should I have given us more of a chance? Delaney had taken a chance when she gave Walker, the biggest player in the county, her heart, and now they were the cutest couple ever. Molly had taken even greater risks with Quinn, and they were so happy together that woodland creatures probably followed them around breaking into spontaneous songs. I wanted what they had, wanted it with Ashton. I found myself wavering a little more every day—at least until things blew up between Molly and Quinn after the homecoming dance and reminded me just how fragile these relationships really were.

  All of us were shocked, and Molly was devastated. She shut down, and all of the painful progress she’d made over the last months with her social anxiety disorder seemed ready to go up in smoke. I couldn’t stand seeing her like that and Delaney couldn’t get through to her, so we agreed I should try my luck cheering her up Saturday morning. When it was late enough for us both to be decently awake I texted her.

  Me: Come over

  Molly: No

  Me: You can’t hide at home forever

  Molly: Watch me

  Me: Please? I’m working on a big art project for school and I could use a second opinion on how I’m doing

  Molly: Why me? I’m not an artist. I can barely draw stick figures

  Me: Because you can give me a fresh perspective

  Me: Pleeeeeaaaaaseeee???

  Molly: FINE. I’ll be over in half an hour

  Me: :) :) :)

  I switched messages to text Delaney.

  Me: She’s coming over

  Delaney: Good! Maybe you can talk some sense into her

  Me: I’ll try. Let you know how it goes later

  But I wasn’t sure what approach really made sense. Quinn had manipulated and lied to her, after all, and hurt her badly. I knew she still cared about him, but was it right to try to convince her to get back together with him after that? What if he hurt her again? Then it would be at least partially my fault. Normally I was the queen of matchmaking, but I just wasn’t sure about this at all.

  Half an hour later Molly was sitting on my bed chugging Mountain Dew and regarding the drawing on my easel with curiosity. She cocked her head to one side and pursed her lips.

  “I wish I knew how you do that. You don’t even have anything to go by—you just draw it.”

  With a shrug I plopped down on the bed beside her. “I see the picture in my head and put it on paper. I don’t know how to explain it any better than that.”

  “However you do it, it’s seriously impressive. I’d give anything to be able to draw like that.”

  “Well, I can’t do what you do in your games.” I was epically awful at most of the games she played. Even Laney was better.

  “Yeah, but it’s not like I can make a living with what I do.”

  “I’m not sure I can, either.”

  “Don’t be silly. You’re amazing. Of course you will.”

  “The term starving artist was invented for a reason.”

  “Dani, you’re not going to starve. You’re brilliant, and so is your work.”

  I frowned at the picture, still not seeing anything at all brilliant about it. “Sometimes. I have to learn to be more consistent if I’m going to make a career of it, though.”

  “Don’t worry. You will.”

  “Maybe. So how are you doing?”

  Her eyes narrowed in a glare. “Why did I have a feeling there was more to this than you just wanting me to look at your art project?”

  “Molly,” I replied softly, “we’re all worried about you. You’ve been doing so well this semester, and we don’t want you shutting yourself away again.”

  “I know,” she grumbled. “Delaney has been driving me crazy.”

  I couldn’t help laughing. “She’ll do that. Smother you with concern.”

  “I’m going to be all right. Someday...”

  “Just don’t shut us out and go back to the way things were.”

  “As if you guys would let me.”

  Reaching over, I gave her knee a gentle pat. “Delaney says that even the best guys make mistakes. You know the stuff she went through with Walker. Boys do stupid things when they’re in love—especially when they’ve never actually been in love before.”

  “You can say that again,” she muttered.

  “But Laney and Walker worked through it, and look at them now.”

  Molly pulled a face at me. “If you’re so freakin’ gung-ho about love and second chances, why are you dancing around this thing with Ashton instead of doing what you both obviously want to do?”

  I sighed and stared out the window. If only. “It’s complicated.”

  “Sure, Dani. It always is when it’s your heart on the line.”

  “I didn’t break up with Ashton because of anything he did.”

  Her eyes widened in confusion. “But I thought you caught him kissing another girl?”

  “No. That was after.”

  “Then why? You’re both obviously crazy about each other.”

  I let myself fall back on my bed and closed my eyes. Why did it have to hurt so much, even after a year?

  “We’ve known each other since elementary school,” I explained. “We were best friends. Then in middle school we got closer. We were each others’ first loves, and from seventh grade on we were officially a couple.”

  My eyes grew moist as I remembered it all. The first movie we went to together. That indescribable feeling when he’d reached over and held my hand for the first time in the dark theater. That first gentle, hesitant kiss shared beneath the stairs of his beach house on a perfect summer evening. A thousand smiles and touches and tender words over two years that had set my heart alight with happiness—happiness I was afraid I’d never feel again.

  “It was his parents,” I told her. “Ashton’s dad is a senior engineer at one of the refineries. His mom is a vice president at one of the big banks in Corpus. They’re both driven high achievers.”

  “So?”

  “So my mom makes arts and crafts that my dad sells in his little shop on the beach along with a bunch of cheap stuff for the tourists. Ashton’s parents didn’t approve of them or their daughter, whose ambition is to be an artist like her mom, so they started trying to break us up.”

  Molly’s jaw dropped. “Seriously?”

  “Yes. They want him to be like them and go into engineering or business or something. Of course they want him to have a girlfriend to match, someone who will be just as ambitious and successful, and I’m obviously not her.”

  “That’s messed up.”

  “So when it became obvious that we were solid as a couple, they started trying to nudge things along. There were disparaging comments and backhanded compliments about me and my parents. They did everything they could to discourage him from spending time with me outside of school and tried pushing the daughters of their friends in front of him in hopes that he’d dump me for someone more to their taste. They even offered him things if he’d stay away from me, and when he wouldn’t go for that they grounded him and took away his phone and told him he’d never get a car.”

  “What a pair of jerks.”

  “The thing is that they’re his parents and his family is really tight, so it was hard for him to push back or defy them. He doesn’t want to disappoint them. He did try, but mostly in little ways like keeping things secret from them. It was hard on him, though, and it got a lot harder when
we got into high school. It put a strain on our relationship. Ash got bitter and angry, until I got scared I was going to lose him completely. So I finally broke it off so we could at least stay friends.”

  “I’m sorry, Dani. But it’s been a year. Maybe it would be different now?”

  “Nothing has changed, and unless it does there’s not much point in trying again. We’re better off as just friends. Maybe after graduation... I don’t know. That’s still almost two years off, and he’ll probably get tired of waiting for me and start dating someone his parents do approve of before then.”

  “So maybe it’s time to move on and find someone else?”

  I gave Molly a sad smile. “I don’t want someone else. I don’t have the slightest interest in any other guy.”

  Molly sighed in commiseration. “I feel ya.”

  “You still have a chance. You can take Quinn back.”

  “Yeah, but I’m too afraid that he’ll hurt me again.”

  “Is that really any worse than being without him?”

  “I don’t know.”

  My phone dinged with an incoming text.

  Ashton: Hey, want to hang out? I got the new Marvel movie

  Me: Can’t. Molly is here. Trying to cheer her up

  At least that had been the plan. Somehow it had backfired, because neither of us was feeling particularly cheerful now.

  Ashton: :(

  Me: Maybe later?

  Ashton: OK. Text me when you can

  I didn’t really want to go over, though. The last thing I needed was to run into his parents, so I avoided texting him back until late that night after I went to bed. I curled up under the covers and cradled my phone in the darkness.

  Me: Sup?

  Ashton: Hey. Working on some pre-cal homework

  Me: Lucky you

  Ashton: A thrill a minute. What are you doing?

  Me: Just went to bed

  Ashton: And there goes my concentration :)

  Me: LOL Behave!

  Ashton: Never. I’ve seen you in your pajamas. Definitely not getting any more homework done

  Me: Don’t you have a test tomorrow?

  Ashton: Yeah. But I’d much rather think about you all warm and snuggly in your PJs