Someone to Trust
Page 11
“After that she saw to it that my sisters and I learned sign language, but she didn’t stop searching for something that would help me hear again.”
She looked at Gabe. He was watching her intently, his eyes full of compassion. “It was Gott’s will.”
“I knew this is the life He has chosen for me. I was content. My mother couldn’t understand that. When I was fifteen, she finally found the ‘cure’ she had been seeking.” Esther knew her bitterness was seeping out in her words.
Gabe tipped his head slightly. “Waneta suggested that you refused to be healed. What did she mean?”
Esther picked up a small stick and threw it in the murky water. “She would say that. My father believes the same thing. My parents insisted I have a cochlear implant. A CI is a device that is placed under the skin behind the ear. It bypasses the ear and sends signals to the nerves that carry sounds to the brain. The doctor said the success rate of the operation was nearly one hundred percent.”
She hadn’t wanted them to spend their life savings on the surgery or to have the entire church pay for her hospital stay, but no one listened to her.
“Is it the same device Nurse Heather talked about?”
“Nee, it isn’t.” She sat staring at the swamp grasses blowing in the breeze for a long time. Finally she looked at Gabe. He was waiting patiently for her to continue.
She sighed. “I had the surgery, but when they turned the device on, it didn’t work the way they said it would. I could hear again, but everything was distorted. There was an awful ringing that wouldn’t stop unless I turned the implant off. No one believed me when I said it didn’t work right. Mamm insisted I just needed to get used to it. My parents had sacrificed so much to get the treatment for me that I kept trying. It was awful. Then my mother got sick and died quite suddenly. After that I put my CI away and didn’t use it again until I met Barnabas King. After he and I parted ways, I left it off for good. I’m Deaf. I accept it.”
“Waneta believes you could hear if you wanted to.”
“She thinks I like the attention of being the only deaf person in the family.”
“I heard it was an inherited disease. No one else in the family is affected?”
“Both my father and my mother have cousins that are deaf. There is a higher-than-average number of deaf children in our community. That’s why a special school was started. I’m a teacher’s assistant there, and I love it. I have Deaf friends. We have great times together. Everyone at the school uses ASL. I never have to guess what someone is saying.” It was the one place she felt safe and valued for who she was.
“Thank you for telling me this.”
She shook her head, amazed and a bit embarrassed by how much she had revealed about herself. “I don’t know why I did.”
“Maybe because I’m your friend, too.”
“I reckon you’re right.” What would he think if she said she wanted to be more than a friend?
Did she?
Gabe wasn’t deaf. He couldn’t know what it was like, but he was kind and understanding. Could she overlook the fact that he was a hearing person and grow to care for him? She already liked him more than she thought possible, but would he want to court a deaf woman? How could she risk her heart only to hear she wasn’t seen as a whole person by the man who wanted to marry her?
Chapter Ten
Unlike the previous two days, Esther went down to breakfast devoid of any eagerness to greet the day. It was Sunday. The families would be going to the prayer meeting that was held every other week. She was expected to join them.
In her Amish community, there was a bishop and two ministers who shared the preaching during the three-or four-hour service. It was unlikely that she would understand much of what was said today. Preachers normally moved about as they spoke to the congregation or read from the Bible. There would be singing that she couldn’t join. Afterward families would visit with each other while the children played together. Her one new friend, Lilly, would not be there this time. While she had met many of the women in the community already, she never felt comfortable in large groups. Today was likely to be a repeat of the picnic, where she watched others enjoying themselves from afar.
The Fisher men were still out doing the morning chores when Esther entered the kitchen. Waneta, Julia, Pamela and Nancy were standing in a semicircle around Talitha. The discussion looked serious, but as soon as Talitha caught sight of her, she smiled and said, “Good morning, Esther. I hope you slept well. How is your headache?”
“Gone. Danki.”
Waneta looked right at Esther. “I’m pleased to hear it,” she said slowly. She then turned and began cracking eggs into a skillet on the stove.
Esther’s sisters all signed, “Good morning.” Then they began to pack several coolers with food that would be served for the noon meal.
It was a strange start to the morning but a welcome change. Esther couldn’t help wondering what they had been discussing. “What can I do?” she asked.
Talitha gestured toward several boxes sitting at the end of the counter. “If you would take the pies out to the buggy, that would be a help. We’re almost ready to go as soon as everyone has had their breakfast.”
Esther stacked the two boxes together and went out the door. She met Zeke coming in. He stepped back to let her pass. Gabe was behind him. He took the boxes from her. “Where do you want these?”
“Your mother said in the back of the buggy.”
“Can you get the buggy door for me?”
“Of course.” She hurried to open it.
After he had the boxes stowed, he leaned against the door frame. “I hope you enjoy the preaching today. Bishop Schultz can be a little long-winded, but he does a fine job.”
“You will have to tell me what he preached about afterward. I doubt I’ll be able to grasp much of it.”
Gabe frowned. “Why?”
“I have yet to meet a preacher who stands still and looks straight at one person for the entire sermon.”
“You have a point. He does like to use the room.”
“I hope you won’t desert me after the meal. That way I know I’ll have at least one person to visit with.”
“You can count on me, but you will find you are welcome in New Covenant. Others will seek you out to get to know you better. We should go in to breakfast.”
She nodded and walked into the house. Everyone was seated at the places. She took her chair across from Gabe and bowed her head for the silent blessing that Zeke would lead. She glanced occasionally at him, waiting for him to signal the end of the prayers. When he did, his sons began passing the plates of food around.
She buttered some toast and sipped her coffee. She wasn’t hungry. She was dreading the morning. At least she might be able to spend time with Gabe in the afternoon.
Everyone finished eating quickly, and the table was cleared. Gabe’s brothers carried out the coolers while the women put on clean, crisp white aprons, black shawls and their black traveling bonnets before heading out to the buggy.
She was seated beside the door in the back seat as they got underway. At the end of the lane, they turned out onto the highway. As they passed the large pond where Gabe had saved her life, she saw a moose step out of the forest and into the water. It was a female with twin calves by her side. Esther reached over and tapped Jonah. “There is your moose.”
He launched himself across her lap to look out the window. He stared at the animals until the buggy rounded a curve in the road. He looked at her with a huge grin on his face. “A cow with two babies. That was so amazing.”
“Better than playing a game of baseball with your friends?” she asked.
“Almost as good as winning against the Mount Hope team.”
As his team had only beaten their rival school once, she was glad she’d seen the animals and pointed them out to him.
An enclosed gray wagon was parked beside the house. A group of men was unloading and carrying in the backless benches that would be used to seat the congregation. Zeke and his sons headed toward the barn where a large group of men stood talking. She recognized Tully, Danny and the bishop among them.
Crops and the weather were no doubt the main topics being discussed. It was that way in every Amish farming community. Zeke took the bishop by the elbow and led him a few feet away from the group, where Gabe joined them. They were soon deep in conversation.
Nancy touched Esther’s arm. “How are you and Gabe getting along?” she signed.
“We have a good working relationship. I think we’re becoming friends. How are you and Moses doing?”
“He’s a very sweet boy. Much more mature than the fellows back home. He plans on being baptized in the fall.”
“That sounds promising. Do you like him?”
“I do, but don’t tell Waneta. We’ll never hear the end of her bragging about her matchmaking skills if she were to suspect Moses and I will be courting.”
“He has asked you to walk out with him?” Esther was surprised.
“He knows I am going home at the end of the month. He has asked if he may write to me, and he has invited me to visit again next summer.”
“I’m happy for you. The Fishers are a warm and caring family.” She would miss Nancy if she moved to Maine, but she wanted her little sister to be happy. It was easy to imagine being content in the Fishers’ home.
“I see they are finished unloading the bench wagon. We can go in.”
Esther followed her sister inside. Julia and Pamela were already seated. The benches had been set out in rows in the living room with an aisle down the middle. Men would sit on one side of the aisle. The women would sit on the other. Married men and women occupied the front rows, while the single women and men sat behind them. Esther soon realized she and her sisters were almost the only single women in the congregation. There were several young girls but none old enough to be courting. It was no wonder Talitha had hatched a plan with Waneta to bring her stepdaughters for a visit.
Across the way Esther saw the Fisher brothers file in and take their seats. Jonah sat with them. Gabe smiled and nodded to her. Behind him, Danny and Jedidiah were also smiling in her direction. Esther quickly realized their eyes were on Julia and Pamela. Did the Fisher brothers know they were in for some competition?
A few minutes later, the bishop and the ministers came into the room. Nancy turned to Esther. As soon as the bishop began to speak, Nancy began to sign his words. Esther normally sat through a service trying to grasp fragments of what was being said by reading the speaker’s lips.
According to Nancy the bishop was informing the congregation that Waneta and her stepdaughters were visiting in the area and that one of the daughters was deaf. Because of that her family members would use sign language to convey the preaching to her.
To Esther’s surprise, he held his hand out flat with his palm up and then brought it toward his chest. “This is the sign for ‘welcome.’ I ask that we all use it to make our deaf visitor feel we are pleased she is among us.”
Nearly everyone turned and looked in Esther’s direction and repeated the sign. She felt heat rising in her face as she made the sign for “thank you.”
Around her people reached for their hymnal, the Ausbund, and opened it. She could see the first song had started. Nancy signed the page number, and Esther flipped to the song so that she could read the lyrics even though she chose not to sing. She remembered many hymns from her childhood, but she couldn’t be certain she was in tune or in time with others. For the rest of the service, Nancy and Pamela traded off signing for Esther so that she was able to understand all that the bishop and the ministers had to say. The sisters received many curious glances. A toddler in the row ahead of them mimicked the signs as she grinned at Esther.
When the prayer meeting was over, they filed outside so that the benches could be rearranged into tables and seating for the meal. Her sisters stayed close beside her and continued to sign for her as she was introduced again to the members of the community. She became reacquainted with the bishop’s wife and the wives of the ministers and their families. Some of the younger women held babies or had toddlers clinging to their skirts. The little girl who had been trying to sign toddled over to Esther and reached up to be held.
Esther picked her up and was struck with a sharp pang of longing to have a family of her own. But that would require a husband. There wasn’t one in her immediate future. The child quickly wanted down and went to play with a little boy near her age.
When Esther had a free moment, she caught Nancy’s arm. “I can’t tell you how much I appreciate you doing this.”
Nancy blushed. “I confess it was Talitha’s suggestion.”
“You’re always so quick to want to do things on your own,” Julia signed.
Pamela nodded. “You can be abrupt and self-absorbed. Sometimes we forget that you do need us.”
“Of course I need you. You’re my sisters.” Esther hugged each of them in turn. “I will try not to be abrupt in the future.”
“And we’ll remind you when you are doing exactly that again.” Julia grinned.
Esther gave her another quick hug. “And I’ll point out when you’re ignoring me.”
“I fear we may have some sisterly squabbles in the future,” Nancy signed.
“We may, but we’ll always make up, because we love each other.” Esther wiped a tear from her eye. “Which one of you taught the bishop how to sign ‘welcome’?”
Nancy shook her head. “It wasn’t us.”
Then it must have been Jonah. “I need to thank Talitha for her thoughtful suggestion.”
She found Waneta and Gabe’s mother in the kitchen setting out the food with some of the other women. “Talitha, my sisters tell me I have you to thank for encouraging them to assist me today.”
“It wasn’t my idea. I merely pointed out to some members of your family that they were being unkind, although I know that was never their intention.” She looked at Waneta.
“Of course it wasn’t the girls’ intention,” Waneta said.
“Did Jonah tell you I dislike crowds?”
“Actually, it was Gabe who mentioned it. He taught the bishop the sign for ‘welcome.’ That was his idea, too,” Talitha said with a knowing smile.
“Gabe did?” For her.
“He thinks a great deal of you,” Waneta said.
Esther kept her face carefully blank. “I value him as a friend, too. Excuse me. I need to thank him.”
Outside she caught a glimpse of Gabe watching from across the way. He was leaning against an empty hay wagon. She crossed the distance between them with her heart pounding in her chest. How could she adequately thank him for everything he had done?
She stopped in front of him and placed her hands on her hips. “I understand you taught the bishop the sign for ‘welcome.’ Who taught you?”
He spelled out “Jonah” in sign.
Her jaw dropped. “Why did you do this?”
“Because I didn’t like the way your sisters ignored you.”
“We used to be close. Now I hope we can be that way again. We simply got used to going our separate ways.”
“I’m glad if I helped.”
She found herself swamped with emotions. Gratitude an
d something else. A sincere warmth for this man filled her heart. If she wasn’t careful, she would blurt out how special he made her feel. “I have a sign name. Deaf people often choose one so they don’t have to spell it out each time. Would you like to know it?”
“Sure.”
“It’s the sign for ‘flower.’” She made the motion of holding a flower by the stem and bringing it to her nose to sniff.
“Flower. It suits you.” He repeated the sign.
“I should get back to my sisters.”
“That’s fine. Enjoy the day. We have plenty of work waiting for us tomorrow.”
She took a step back. “It’s the kind of work I don’t mind if you’re there to help.” She clamped her lips shut and spun on her heels. She managed to walk, not run, away from him and her growing feelings for this generous and thoughtful man.
* * *
Gabe smiled as she walked off. He was glad he had managed to improve her relationship with her sisters and allow her to understand the preaching today. Hearing the words God moved their ministers and bishop to speak brought them all closer to God and to each other. No one should be alone in this life.
Seth stopped beside Gabe. “You like her a lot, don’t you?”
He couldn’t fool his brother, so he didn’t try. “I do.”
“I think she likes you, too.”
“As a friend.”
“Maybe a little more than that?” Seth suggested.
“She doesn’t want a hearing fellow. She has made that plain.”
“Maybe that is what her head says. Sometimes the heart leads one down an unexpected path.”
“Is that what happened to you? Pamela and you seem fond of each other in spite of the fact that you claimed you had no interest in finding a wife yet.”
“I’m not ready to marry her, but I do like her a lot. Should I ask her to be your go-between and find out if Esther is interested in dating you?”