by L. P. Maxa
“How you doing with that? I feel like other than band stuff, I haven’t gotten to really talk to you about everything.”
“I’m good. We’re good.” I let out a quick laugh. “I mean, walking into the living room and seeing Landry standing there was the biggest shock of my life. I was so damn overwhelmed and terrified.” I took another drink. “But then? I don’t know. Things just started to fall into place. I feel so damn guilty that she’s had a hard life, that I wasn’t there for her. But honestly, if I’d have found out about her nine years ago? I don’t know if I would have stuck around. Now, the more time I spend with her, the more I fall in love. I never thought I wanted to be a dad. But now that I am, now that she’s here, it just feels right.”
Smith wiped the corner of his eyes with his fingers. “If you tell anyone I just cried, I’ll kick your ass.” He pulled me in for a hug. “I’m proud of you, bro. Really fucking proud.” He pulled back a little but didn’t let me go. Sober Smith was kind of an emotional sap. “I’ve been meaning to ask you, where was Landry living? She has the sweetest little accent, it reminds me of—”
“Are we interrupting something? We can always come back later.”
Smith and I stepped back from each other at the sound of Bryan’s voice. I turned toward her to make a smart-ass comment, but the words died on my lips. She rendered me speechless. Her long hair was flowing down her back in soft curls, her ripped jeans were tight, her shirt fell off one shoulder, and her heels screamed fuck me. She wasn’t wearing much makeup. She never did; she didn’t need it. Her eyelashes were thick and curled and her lips were plump and glossy. Yep. It was official. I wanted to bang the hell out of my best friend. Like, up against the wall, fingers digging into her flesh, sweat dripping down our bodies. Bang her.
***
I’d planned on taking Bryan out to a nice expensive dinner. But she and Dylan had a different idea. They wanted shots, beer, and bar food. Who didn’t love a low-maintenance Southern girl? I’d hired a driver for the night, and B ordered him to take us to a dive bar. And he had. We pulled up to a rundown shack. The name across the top was so faded I couldn’t read it and there were more old rusted trucks out front than anything else. I thought the girls would balk, but instead they walked in like they owned the joint, ordered a round of tequila shots, a round of beers, and put twenty dollars in the jukebox.
The four of us were playing darts, and B was kicking my ass. “I think you’re cheating.”
She let out a chuckle. “And I think you are a sore loser.”
Smith clapped me on my back. “Always has been.”
The place was pretty much empty when we got here, but it was starting to fill up fast. We’d gotten some stares from a couple younger chicks, but no one had asked us to sign anything or pose for pictures. Yet. Bryan had been a little quiet at first, but I just kept joking around and messing with her until she lightened up. Maybe I’d been making her uncomfortable lately. I’m sure I’d been putting out weird vibes since I realized I had feelings for her. If treating her like my BFF made her feel better, then I would. Well, I would as long as I could. I didn’t know how much longer I’d be able to wait to kiss her. I kept staring at her lips.
“Show me how you pick up chicks. Let me watch. I’ll be your wingman, whether you think you need one or not.” Bryan took a pull off her beer and then used it to point to a blonde on the small dance floor. “What about her? She looks easy.”
I shook my head. “Nah. Easy is no fun. Besides, I like brunettes.” The truth was I was never picky before. Blonde, brunette, redhead. All had the same thing I wanted. But Bryan was a brunette and I was very subtly trying to drop hints.
“Okay, okay. Uh…there’s one. The girl at the pool table in the short skirt.” Bryan watched as the girl bent over to line up her next shot. “I’m pretty sure she isn’t wearing underwear.”
I didn’t bother looking. No one could ever compare to Bryan. The way her eyes held so much humor, the way she smiled with her lips against her beer bottle, everything about her was what I wanted. Did she not see that? Or did she see it, and not like it? “It’s all about the chase, doll.” I polished off my beer and then tossed it into the trash. “First I make eye contact with the one I want, hold it for a little longer than I normally would, and then look away. I go about my night, dancing and drinking and laughing. But every once in a while, catch her eye again. I don’t smile, don’t let her know it’s intentional. Sooner or later, she’ll come to me.”
Bryan laughed at my words as Dylan came up and grabbed her hand, pulling her out to the dance floor. Smith walked over and handed me a fresh drink. “Could you eye fuck her any harder? Is that the way a friend behaves?”
I took a drink from the cold bottle. “I think I just might have a crush on your girlfriend’s baby sister.”
Smith put his hand to his chest. “What?! You fell for your sexy, down-to-earth, hilarious, bad-ass best friend? Who could have possibly seen that coming?” Then he crossed his arms, his tone once again becoming serious. “Oh, right. All of us.”
I winced. “It’s slightly terrifying for several reasons. One being that Dylan isn’t a fan of us being together and I’m afraid she’ll cut my dick off.”
Smith nodded. “Be careful, she’ll do it. I mean, shit, she shot my dad.”
My eyes went wide. “What? She shot your old man? When?”
Smith turned slightly away from the dance floor. “New Orleans.”
I knew there was a confrontation with Smith’s asshole drug-addicted low-life father, but I had no idea that Dylan shot him. “Did she kill him?” I didn’t think so. I figured we would have known if he had died, but maybe not. Smith wasn’t one to share about his family.
“Nah. She shot him in the foot. He was fine.” Smith let out a laugh. “Dylan means well, you know? She’s protective of the people she loves, and it seems to me that she is trying to look out for you just as much, if not more, than she is her sister. She says that Bryan never sticks around, she gets bored easily. You have Landry now, stable is your new middle name.”
“I just can’t picture Bryan leaving us…but maybe Dylan is right to worry, she’s known her a hell of a lot longer than I have.” That last comment felt bad on my tongue. I hated even entertaining the thought that Bryan would just up and leave us on a whim.
“Don’t worry so much about what Dylan thinks. She cleaned up your puke. She watched you stumble in, night after night… She’s hesitant when it comes to the two of you. You both seem volatile to her, you know?”
Smith was right. Dylan had literally cleaned up my messes when she had joined us on tour. I knew to her I was just a player with a drinking problem. And I couldn’t really blame her for thinking it. “Lexi cleaned up your messes too, man. But she didn’t get in the way of you and Dil.”
“Dylan isn’t Lexi’s baby sister.” Smith smiled, almost apologetically. “Look, man, you did me a solid when I was about to screw things up with Dylan before they even started. I owe you, and I’m here for you.”
I shrugged. “To be honest, I’m not even sure Bryan is into me. I’ve never had to guess at that before, never really had to put myself out there.”
“She’s into you, man. Why do you think Dylan has her panties in a twist about everything?”
We both stayed quiet for a while, just watching the girls dance and sing. You could see the love between them, that unmistakable bond of sisters. I bet when you added Mikah to the mix, it was even more profound. “You have any advice? You have insight into these Lawson girls.”
Smith took a deep breath. “They were raised to be strong, capable women. They can hold their own in any situation, don’t forget that. And just be yourself, and be honest. They don’t take well to fake.” He chuckled. “Oh, and ice. Keep some ice handy.”
“Ice?”
“You’ll see.”
I watched as Dylan spun Bryan around. I made sure to catch her eye. She wanted to watch me pick up a chick? She’d get a front row seat. “L
After the next song was over, the girls came and joined us at the bar. It was a good thing too, because we were starting to draw a crowd of ladies. Smith grabbed Dylan, dipped her back, and kissed her—letting the chicks know he was taken and the men know to back the fuck away. My hands itched to do the same to B. Every male eye in the bar had been on her while she danced with her sister. I settled with pulling her in for a one-armed hug around her neck and a kiss to the top of her head. It would have to do for now. I didn’t need Dylan chasing me around the dance floor with a knife.
Bryan looked around the room. “Did you pick one?”
I chuckled, “Yeah, I picked one.” The jukebox was blaring out some Manfred Mann’s. I grabbed B’s hand, spun her in a circle, singing at the top of my lungs, “Wrapped up like a douche another roller in the night!”
Bryan started cracking up, like bending over holding her side, cracking up. “What the hell did you just say? What kind of musician are you? Those aren’t the words to that song.”
I scoffed, “Yes they are.”
She shook her head. “No. They aren’t.”
“Okay, lyric police, what is he singing?”
Bryan waited for the chorus to come back around and then sang loudly next to my ear, completely and totally off key. “Revved up like a deuce another runner in the night!”
I pursed my lips. That did make more sense than singing about a douche. “You sure?”
Smith threw his arm around her shoulders. “Why’d you correct him? We’ve been letting him sing the wrong words for a decade. It’s hilarious. I’m pretty sure there is even a YouTube video of it somewhere.”
I gasped in outrage. “You guys are all assholes.”
Eventually Bryan and Dylan went back out to dance, so Smith and I hustled a few games of pool. Before I knew it, a couple hours had gone by and it was last call. We grabbed the girls on the way to close out our tab. Thanks to her cock-blocking older sister I hadn’t gotten to spend any alone with B all night. Watching her dance and laugh had only made me want her more. She used my own pick-up moves on me without even knowing it. The way she danced, holy hell. Her tight little body, her curves. I knew every man in the bar was thinking the exact same thing I was. It made me want to kill them, and fuck her. I didn’t know if making a move would be the best thing I ever did, or the worst. But I couldn’t stay away from her any longer. It was inevitable.
While we were waiting outside for our driver, Bryan put her head close to mine. “You know, I’m pretty sure that blonde chick we saw earlier would be up for anything.”
I put my hand on the small of her back and pulled her body against mine, putting my mouth next to her ear. “The question is, doll, would you?”
She took a small step back, her eyes searching my face for any traces of humor. But I was dead serious. I grabbed her and brought her back against me, letting her feel my hard body. “You’re the only girl I have eyes for.”
“Guys! The car is here.”
Bryan stepped back again when Smith opened the door to the black SUV. She climbed into the third row and when Dylan went to climb in next to her, Smith put his arm around her waist and gestured for me to get in. I loved my bandmate. I got in and sat down as close to B as possible. She was quiet, I could feel the confusion coming off her. The inside of the car was dark, the tinted windows not really letting in any light from the street. I reached for her hand, threading our fingers together. Our first kiss would not be in the backseat of a car with her sister sitting a few feet in front of us. I wanted to savor her.
***
As soon as we got home I headed upstairs to check on Landry. She was still sound asleep in her pile of stuffed animals and blankets. Her dark thick eyelashes resting against her beautiful skin. I shut her door a little more and then crossed the hall to my room. I was nervous. And scared. Crossing this line with Bryan? It was intense; it was important. And I didn’t want to fuck it up. I wasn’t sure I knew how to give her the relationship she deserved. And apparently she might not know how to stick around after three months. It’d been so long since I was with someone I actually cared about. I sat on the edge of my bed, my head in my hands. What kind of example was I to my kid? I vowed right then and there to change my ways, change the way I saw and talked about women. I’d be damned if my little girl grew up thinking that it was okay to be treated like anything less than royalty. And I’d start with Bryan. I’d treat her so damn good that she’d never want to leave.
I looked up when I felt her walk in. I could always feel her when she entered a room. It was like she caused a shift in the air around me. “Hey, doll.”
Her smile was cautious, like she was nervous too. “Hey.”
I stood and closed the door softly. I’d open it later, just in case Landry needed us. Us. I stepped back and placed my hands on Bryan’s face. “You looked gorgeous tonight, although I might be biased because I think you look gorgeous every night.” I let one hand move to her hair, grabbing the dark silky strands in my fingers. “I couldn’t see anyone but you. You are all I ever see, baby doll.”
“Jacks…” She said my name in that soft way again.
“I want you. If I’m being honest, I’ve wanted you since the moment I fucking met you. I haven’t wanted to go out, haven’t wanted to miss your call. Talking to you is the highlight of my day. You are the best friend I’ve ever had, I couldn’t have made it these last few days without you. But having you here, holding you while you sleep and seeing you across the dinner table… I want more than your friendship. I want all of you. And I’m done pretending like I don’t.” I held my breath, it was all out there now. There was no taking it back. I told her how I felt, what I wanted. And now it was up to her. I should take a step back and give her room to think, but I couldn’t. “Talk to me, baby doll.”
She sat down across from me at the desk chair. Her mouth opened and closed a few times. Like she was trying to find the right words. Was she trying to find a way to let me down gently? For a brief moment in time I got a glimpse of what heartbreak felt like. And it fucking sucked. “I think I want more too.”
I raised an eyebrow. “You think?”
She took a deep breath and pulled her lower lip through her perfect teeth. “No. I know I want more. I just— Jacks, this can all become really complicated.” She stood and started pacing the room. “For starters my sister is dating your bandmate and friend. Not to mention the fact that I’m here for the whole summer to help you with Landry.” She paused long enough to gesture across the hall. “And Landry…that poor girl. I mean what if things so south with us, what would that do to her? Dylan isn’t wrong, Jacks. I get bored. I leave. I can’t explain why or what happens, but it does. There are just a lot of variables here. And as much as I would love to just throw caution to the wind and mount you right now, there are people we love at stake.”
See? That right there was why Bryan and I were perfect together; I was ready to dive in head first and she was being slightly cautious and hilariously sexy. She said she wanted to mount me. We were soul mates. I reached out and grabbed her hands, making her stand still. “I completely agree with you on Landry. The last thing I want to do is harm her or make her feel sad or abandoned. As far as your cock-blocking sister goes, she will just have to deal with us being together. And I promise you, doll, you’ll never get bored with me, so don’t even worry about that.” I wasn’t like any other guy she’d ever dated, she’d see. I was the one she’d been waiting on, I was the reason she always left before.
That got a smile out of her. “Jacks, what happens when this ends badly?”
“This will not end badly, baby doll.” I pulled her toward me, looking up into her eyes. “You and me? There is only happily ever after.”
She snorted out a giggle. “That was incredibly sappy. But also very sweet.” She climbed into my lap and rested her head on top of mine. “Can we go slow? One step at a time?”
“Go slow…? Like how…?” Did that mean I was going to have to wait a long time to get inside her? That would suck. It’d be worth it, but it’d suck.
“Like one date at a time? One base at a time?”
“Base? You mean sex?” My dick was frowning.
“I don’t want to rush this. I don’t want to complicate it right away with sex.” She bit her lower lip again. “And to be honest? Your cock kind of scares me. I need to work up to it.”
Couldn’t argue with her there. She was petite, we would definitely need to ease into it, pun intended. I kissed her chest. “Does that mean that tonight was our first date?”
“Yes.”
“Okay, get up.” I scooted her off my lap and walked her back toward my bedroom door. “Pretend like I’m walking you to your door after our date.”
“This is your door.”
“You are on so much crack if you think I’m sleeping without you next to me ever again. Now, come on, play along.” I waited until she nodded before continuing, “I had a really great time tonight.”
She shook her head, laughing quietly. “I did too. Thanks for finally asking me out.”
I looked down at my shoes. “Would you, um, maybe, like want to go out again some time?”
“Uh…I don’t know. Maybe.” She shrugged.
I stomped my foot. “You are supposed to act all giddy and excited that I want to see you again.”
“Okay, I’m sorry, ask me again.”
“No. You lost your chance. You hurt my ego, now I’m probably going to try to bang your roommate.”
She narrowed her eyes. “My roommate would never go for you. She likes really beefy muscular guys—”
I didn’t let her finish her joke; I tackled her on the bed. When we locked eyes, all the laughter faded away. I was looking at the girl I was falling in love with, the only girl I’d ever fallen for. I put my hand on her cheek and brought my mouth down to hers. When our lips touched, I swear I felt that kiss from my head to my toes and everywhere in between. We lay side by side on the bed, our body a tangle of mouths and limbs. I grabbed her leg and hitched it up higher on my hip. I was hard as hell, and the friction against her core was making it difficult to breathe. I ran my hand up the inside of her shirt, rubbing her nipple through the rough lace of her bra. I let out a groan when she started to move underneath me, seeking the same release I needed.
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