Coming Home (Only Time Will Tell #1)

by Caroline Spencer

  I’m so glad that I’ve had a couple of days without seeing Kyle. Not that any of this is his fault, but I hate to look at him and be reminded of everything to do with his mother. Her words keep swinging ‘round and ‘round in my head and I hate that she has this emotional control over me. She knew the exact words to destroy me. Knew exactly what had happened to me, to us, and yet she could stand there and act like this whole thing was a candy wrapper, screwing it up and tossing it away. That woman clearly has no heart.

  Wednesday night was eventful, trying to drink my thoughts away while Nod tried to keep them spurting out of my mouth. I managed not to delve too much into them. I told her what I could without going as far as blurting the whole damn thing, not without speaking to Kyle first. It’s still my number one priority. I just need to find the time and place to do it so that we aren’t both high on emotions or each other. I can cope, just about, with losing him but I need to know that I gave it my best shot and let him hear the whole story clearly before he makes that choice.

  “Oh, oh, oh,” Nadine excitedly shouts from her desk as I’m staring blankly at the figures on the computer screen. “Please, come and look at this dress. I want to know your opinion to see if it’d be a good back up.”

  “Back up?” I ask as I push myself away from the desk and out of my chair as I start walking around to her. “Have you got a dress in mind to begin with?”

  “Of course I have, but I’m scared it’ll be over the top. So if that one fails I need another plan.”

  I stand behind her and stare at the simple white dress on the screen, crossing my arms over my chest as I ask, “What’s the other one like? Does it look like it has a personality?”

  “You hate it.”

  It wasn’t a question but I’ll admit that it was a nice dress, just not Nod.

  “You can see the other one later. I don’t want to paint it in a bad light because I don’t think I’ll do it justice describing it.”

  Taking a seat back at my computer I aim to make a start on the work I’ve been trying to do all day when it hits me. “Later? How will I see it later?” I hadn’t made any plans to do anything with Nod at all.

  Her eyes grow wider, as does her mouth. “Are you serious? You expect me to dress for this thing without you? I thought it was an unwritten best friend rule.”

  “She’s right,” Nicole interrupts. I think it’s the first time she’s ever jumped in on one of our conversations. “The only person a girl can trust to go shopping with is her best friend. Boyfriends are scared to tell the truth in case of an argument and well, friends dare not tell you because they might hurt your feelings. Best friends, however, will tell you the truth regardless.”

  “See!” Nadine screeches, waving her hand at Nicole. “I told you and believe me that’s the truth. You have got to help me, if you are adamant on not coming and keeping me company you could at least assist in the boutique. I promise I won’t take forever.”

  After a quick roll of the eyes I slam my forehead against the desk, not seeing a get out of jail card for this one. “Does it have to be tonight?” I ask against the wooden surface.

  “Yes. I’m working tomorrow night and Saturday is pamper day so it’s tonight or nothing. I’m not ashamed to beg either so you can say yes and get this over with or I will get on my hands and knees and crawl after you until you do. You know I’ll do that too.”

  I do, damn it. What’s the worst that could happen? Nothing. Exactly. I’m just being a weirdo who would rather stay at home alone rather than do something normal. “Fine. I’ll come.”

  “Yay!”

  Standing outside the boutique I glance between Nod and the door, waiting patiently for her to make any indication about heading in there before we both become ornaments. “Is there a problem? You do realize that you walk into these places through that big glass thing that has the store name plastered across it. It’s a new invention, we call them doors.”

  She glances sideways at me, scowling before stopping the assault on her nails. “You can be such a sarcastic bitch at times, you know that, right?”

  “It’s been mentioned,” I shrug.

  “I’m nervous. What if they don’t have it or it looks hideous. What will I do?”

  Jutting out my bottom lip I release a long, exaggerated sigh. “It’s a dress. I know you’re in love with the one you saw but you might find another that’s “the one.” Just go in and try it on. We’ve been out here for ages, someone else could easily have got their hands on it by now.”

  Her eyes bug as she thinks about that. “You’re right. I’ll go look, can you go and do something—” she flits her hands around the surrounding space, “—else. I’ll text you when I have the dress on or one I like. I don’t want you to cast judgment on it while it’s on the hanger.”

  My hands fly in the air out of exasperation. “Seriously? You dragged me all the way to the other side of town so I could spend time with myself? I could have done that at home and let you send a picture. Jesus, woman.”

  I stare at her expecting her to give in. She doesn’t. So I end up walking to the nearest coffee shop.

  After ordering a caramel latte I find a seat closest to the window and stare out at everything that’s happening outside. Watching people go about, minding their own business, while I sit here and do what I love too. People watch.

  Sipping at my drink I watch as a young woman walks past juggling her groceries while trying to control her hyperactive child. The little girl’s pigtails bouncing around as she jumps, skips and runs along the sidewalk while her mother, I assume, tries to keep up with her, shouting her name as it falls on deaf ears.

  On the opposite side is an older couple, possibly in their eighties, holding hands, laughing and smiling with each other. It melts me, knowing that love like that still exists, love that can stand the test of time.

  Before I moved I always thought of me and Kyle being like that. Being old and gray and still finding a way to put a smile on each other’s face, grandchildren running around our ankles keeping us on our toes and young at heart. That thought alone now cuts deep, picturing things that could have been—that will possibly never happen, considering the past.

  A tear trickles down my face, surprising me with its presence just as my phone rings. Popping the takeout cup on the table I dig through my purse and answer, deliberately irritated. “Yes?”

  “Eeeek! I’ve got it on and I’m in love but I really do need your opinion…will you come back? Please.”

  I smile to myself at her excitement. “Of course I will. I want to see what you’ve caused a big fuss about.”

  I hang up and collect my things and head back to the store, quickly finishing the latte and throwing away the cup before I get to the boutique.

  Stepping through the door soft, relaxing music envelopes me and causes another smile. This time I have no idea why. They probably hypnotize you the moment you walk in so that you don’t walk out without spending a fortune. A petite redhead wanders over flashing the biggest sales assistant smile known to man. “Can I help you with anything today?”

  “No thanks,” I smile back. “I’m meeting a friend. Blond, drooling over a dress?”

  She nods and laughs. “She’s through here, she said to keep an eye out for you. Follow me.”

  I do as I’m told and follow her to a doorway at the back of the room. As I step in I face a closed, purple, velvet curtain and I second guess telling her I’m here but I wouldn’t be a good friend if I did. She’s happy. “Can I see it yet or are you going to describe it to me through the curtain?”

  Her head whips out and I can see from the bobbing curtain, she’s excited. “Oh no, you can see. I think I might buy it just so I can walk around the apartment all day.” She beams and then ducks back behind the curtain.

  A couple of seconds later the curtain is pulled back and she stands there, my mouth physically drops. Wow!

  I can see she’s nervous about my thoughts of the dress but she needn’t be. This is d
efinitely the dress for her. Not the stupid white one.

  It’s strapless and pools just enough on the floor. It fits like it was made just for her and the whole room will know she’s there. It’s completely covered in turquoise sequins and doesn’t look cheap and tacky. She was right about one thing, describing it would have made me say no instantly. She did the right thing by putting it on. She looks amazing. “I have no idea what to say to you. It’s just you, it’s the dress. You’re wearing it at the ball and around the apartment. Ryan will be eating out of your hands.”

  “Seriously?” she asks, twisting her hands against her stomach. “You don’t think it’s too much?” glancing at herself in the mirrors around her.

  “I would tell you, trust me. It’s perfect.”

  I take a seat and sigh as she closes the curtain. She can go from one extreme to the other quicker than snapping your fingers.

  “Did you want to look around?” Nod asks from behind the curtain startling me.

  Staring at the material like she can see my confused expression I ask, “Why the hell would I do that?”

  “Because,” she starts, sounding high pitched. “I thought you might find a dress to wear for the ball…”

  Ohhh! You thought that me being surrounded by pretty, expensive dresses would make me want to spend an ungodly amount and spend the night with the witch… “Don’t even go there. I told you last night that I wasn’t and I gave you perfectly reasonable reasons why.”

  “Oh, Come on, Cat. I want you there and so does Kyle.”

  It crosses my mind that I may need to start recording my conversations with her, just so I don’t have to repeat myself a million times. “No. You’ll both be fine, you both have dates to keep you occupied.”

  The curtain swings back revealing an extremely annoyed woman. “For fucks sake Cat, he wanted you there and you just dismissed it because of her? Where’s your back bone gone?”

  It’s not my back bone that’s the problem—it’s everything but that. It would all make sense to her if I could talk to her about it, but I can’t. “I still have that. Listen, I haven’t said no so that you can try and persuade me. I said no, because I don’t want to go. I hate things like that. I’ll donate whatever to the cause but I refuse to go to something that will have probably cost more than what they raise to hold.” Okay, if she wasn’t there I probably would have gone, however I have always thought that it seemed stupid spending a fortune on being there to donate more. I could make my donation and use the money I’ve saved from not buying a complete outfit on top. Bonus!

  “Nothing will make you change your mind?”

  “No.”

  “Good evening Miss James,” the old guy behind the desk greats as I finally walk through the lobby.

  “Evening. Are you having a good night?”

  He chuckles and nods. “I am, thank you. You’re home late.”

  It’s like living with my parents all of a sudden. “Shopping,” I smile. “Not me obviously, with a friend, ready for bed now though. She knows how to drag you to the four corners of the earth.”

  “I think it’s a female thing,” he jokes, scrunching up his nose and nodding again.

  “True,” I add as I step into the waiting elevator.

  I can’t believe it’s gone nine and I’m only just walking in. After she bought the dress we hailed a cab to take us to the mall so that she could buy everything else. And I mean everything. Heels, purse, jewelry…even new underwear. I looked like a pack horse as we walked from store to store after stupidly offering to carry her bags so she could shop freely. I think that’s what killed me.

  Walking into the apartment I kick my shoes off and launch my bag into the darkness, happy to just enjoy peace and quiet for a while. My eyes are barely capable of staying open. Needing a few minutes to myself, I groan as I collapse onto the lounger, prepared for the damn thing to collapse under me after hitting it with such a force, but it doesn’t. In fact, it does nothing that it’s supposed to. It doesn’t even try to crack my back with it’s hardness. I sit bolt upright and stare around at everything in the pitch black, making out the outlines of everything that is mine. It is my apartment, right? Getting up I dart to the nearest light switch and turn on the lights. Yup, everything is mine, but where the hell did the couches come from? And the flowers on the coffee table?

  Going back, I take a seat and stare at the alien furniture. I wasn’t expecting something so soft and bouncy when I collapsed here moments ago, not in a million years, and I’m half waiting for someone to come and knock on the door and tell me that there’s been a mistake. No matter how many times I look at the door though, no one knocks. My attention goes to the flowers, which is an arrangement of calla lilies; except one, which I couldn’t see before. A blue ox-eye. Kyle!

  After a quick inspection for a card I finally find it face down against the glass. I quickly read it and call the number on the back, trying to not get pissed off as the phone rings.

  “Hello?”

  “Hello? Is that all you can say? How did you get in here and what the hell are these doing here?” I ask, my resolve to stay calm slipping.

  He chuckles and says, “They’re yours. And I got in with a key, it’s usually how people get from one side to the other of a locked door.”

  “Don’t be smart ass. I know how doors work, it’s just the fact that only I have a key and at no point today did I give it to you.”

  He blows out a breath. I’m assuming he wasn’t expecting me to get so irked about it. “I got a key cut the other day. You needed couches and I wanted to say sorry for whatever I’ve done to upset you.”

  “I’m not upset with you. And that was after you had my key so don’t start lying to me.”

  “I know, I got it done because I felt better knowing I could get to you if I needed to. If you collapsed or something and couldn’t get to the door… I could still get to you.”

  I don’t know why it makes me laugh. It could be the fact he’s thought of that possibility or that his bottom lip sounds like it sticking out like a scolded little boy. “You have a wild imagination, you know that?”

  “I like to think of it as thinking of every possibility. Are you sure I haven’t upset you? You looked hurt when you left and you haven’t called, it wasn’t because of the Penelope thing, was it?”

  “No. I said I wasn’t going so you might as well make your Mom and Penelope happy. I think I was just tired and needed to sleep. Honestly, it wasn’t anything you did.”

  He laughs a little and then sighs. It’s moments like this when I wish I could just spill my guts to him and explain everything, but it’s not fair over the phone. But we’re both…normal. No emotions, not really. “Will you get these couches picked up though? I don’t want your money or hand outs, that’s the last thing I’d want from you. Thank you for the flowers, too.”

  “You’re welcome and no. Can’t you think of it as a birthday and Christmas present for every one missed since you left? Or you could owe me a dance this weekend?”

  Is it the world’s mission? “I’m still not going, so no. I’ll think of some way to pay you back. I wouldn’t take these as gifts, you’ve spent a fortune.”

  “You’re worth it.” He sighs and my hearts gone…mush, like a marshmallow. “I take it you haven’t been in to the bedroom yet though?”

  New bed? New bathroom? New wardrobe? “No, why?”

  “Go look.”

  I don’t want to, I could just sleep on my new couches. I take my time checking that the door is locked and collecting my purse and shoes before I even step in there. Even throwing everything down with my eyes closed and going back to turn the lights off before I find out what he wants me to see. It annoys him too, because he starts nagging down the phone at me.

  With a flick of the switch my eyes zone in on what he wanted me to see. In the middle of the bed is a basket full of Butterfingers. I screech and throw him a few thank you’s.

  “Oh, I buy you furniture and I’m the devil, b
ut candy and everything is okay?”

  “Pretty much,” I laugh. “You know I love these and they were always your apology sweetener. No matter what you did as a kid, you got me one before you faced me.”

  One of the good things about England was they didn’t have them. I’d have probably crumbled going down the candy isle every time. It’s not so much what it was, even though I do love them; it was the fact that it was his way of sweetening me. A joke that went on and on. It started one day while we were in a store and he mentioned that he was hanging with the guys that weekend. I wasn’t bothered but I pretended I was and said I’d only let him if he got me one. So he did. It happened a couple more times before he started handing me the Butterfinger and then asked. I would never have stopped him doing what he wanted or have stayed mad with him over anything. It just became our thing.

  “I know. I knew they’d help my case. Some things never change.”

  “Swap with me?” Nod whines as we walk towards the bar where she works. “I’d rather be being waited on than serving drunken fools. I want to be the fool.”

  Giving her a sideways glance I tell her, “Do you know you sound like a child when you’re like this? Man up, you want this house so you have to work your butt off for it. It’ll be worth it in the end.”

  “Sorry, wise one. I forgot you have your own place and a man that buys you things without asking that would probably be a good chunk of my deposit.”

  I groan to myself, regretting that I’d mentioned my new furniture. She was just as stunned as I was. “He’s not my man. And trust me, if I could remove the damned things I would. I don’t want gifts or money from him. It’s all weird.”

  The clicking of her heels stops abruptly along the side walk. “Weird? What’s so weird about all of it? You two had a relationship years ago and now he’s back in your life. He’s trying to make you give him a chance, in my opinion. You’re the one who’s hell-bent on keeping a few brick walls between you.”