When his tongue slid into her mouth, her eyes rolled shut, and she gave into it. She’d forgotten how wonderful French kissing was and yet, this seemed different, slower, more sensual. Their tongues brushed together as he languidly explored her mouth. He ran his tongue along the edge of her teeth, then tickled the roof of her mouth.
She felt as liquid as the water around her. He tasted like the Dr. Pepper he liked to drink, sweet and intoxicating. She loved the way he felt, all of him, surrounding her. The water was ninety degrees, at least, and if they stayed there much longer, she could easily imagine it boiling.
“Maddie,” he whispered, pulling down on the strands of her hair. She thought his eyes were closed, and just the sound of her name on his lips, sounding breathy and dreamy, she thought she was in heaven.
She whispered his name, because she wanted him to know how wonderful it felt to hear it. His hands moved higher on her waist, and then his thumbs were brushing her nipples outside her bra, just barely, whisper-light touches that sent a jolt of fire through her. She kissed him again, feeling the evidence of desire and relishing that she was the cause of it. A growling sound came from his throat, and his kiss became more ardent.
There were only two thin pieces of fabric separating them. One of his hands slid down her back beneath the waistband of her panties, and then the other, and he cupped her behind and pulled her flush against his body. She wanted to grind against him and soothe this burning ache she’d never felt before.
Her heart jumped into her throat when his thumbs traced around her sides and tickled at the edge of her pubic area. How far would this go, and did she want to stop it even though it was wrong, it had to be wrong, didn’t it?
Yes, it was wrong, because she loved Wayne. Because this scared her, she’d never felt quite like this before, never wanted anyone’s hands on her the way she wanted Chase’s hands on her, and anyone meant Wayne, the love of her life, the only man she would ever want…
When she opened her eyes, she saw that the warehouse lights were on. Then a familiar voice that reminded her of being a teenager again, of sneaking kisses and more on the back porch and being alert of her parents coming out at any time.
Mom!
She wriggled out of Chase’s hold, feeling disappointed and embarrassed and ashamed all at once. “My mom’s here!”
Chase groaned, but was already helping her toward the shore. “Get your clothes on and tell them you fell in.”
Definite flashbacks of doing what she shouldn’t be with Wayne and nearly getting caught. Her heart was pounding for a different reason as she scrambled toward shore and fumbled with her clothes.
“She shot out of the house like a pistol when she found out I asked you to fire Chase. I thought she was coming to see you,” Mom said, “She must be talking to him.”
Maddie jerked up her pants and called out, “Mom?” as she headed toward the dock. She knew her smile was as phony as fat-free cream cheese, and her laugh that sheep-bleating kind. “I fell in the water.”
Her mom, still wearing her pink housecoat, squinted at Maddie. “What?”
“When I got here, I saw dolphins swimming over there.” Well, sort of the truth. “I lost my footing and fell in.”
She expected fear and concern over her well-being, but all she got was Mom’s narrowed-eyed look. “You’ve got that same guilty look on your face as you had when you were doing something you shouldn’t have been with Wayne.” She looked toward The Barnacle. “I’m going to talk to that man.” She pulled Maddie along as though she were a child.
Just minutes ago, she definitely had not felt like a child. For the first time she’d felt like a woman.
Colleen’s words came back to her. You’ll always be Baby.
How could she explain that she’d been in the water in the dark with Chase? Betraying her husband’s memory with the man he’d sent to help her?
“Excuse me! Hello!” Mom called out in a much-too-loud voice.
Several long minutes dragged by. It was going to look suspicious when he didn’t make an appearance. Just when Mom turned to Maddie with an accusatory expression, Chase climbed out the companionway looking puzzled and delicious—that word again—wearing only a towel. He was drying his hair.
“Sorry, I didn’t hear you. I was in the shower.” He took in her mother, then glanced at Maddie, keeping his expression perfectly bland. “Hey, Maddie. What’s wrong?”
Mom clearly didn’t know what to make of it. She drew a breath and puffed up her shoulders. “Didn’t you hear Maddie fall into the bay a few minutes earlier?”
“Sorry, I didn’t.” He looked at her again and rubbed his nose. “You all right?”
She tried not to smile at the giveaway that he was lying. “Fine. Loose rocks down there.”
He glanced over the dark water. “Aren’t you afraid of what’s down there at night?”
She really had to squelch her smile. “Same as what’s down there during the day, I’d guess.”
“Chase, she’s gone through hard times this past year, and she doesn’t need anything to send her off-balance. She’s got her family, and that’s all she needs. Thank you.”
With Maddie in tow, she headed back down the dock. Maddie tried hard not to look back at Chase.
“Mom, I hate when you do that.”
“What? Straighten out your messes?”
“No, talk about me as though I wasn’t there.” Once she’d said the words, she realized how true it was. Her long-suppressed irritation bombarded her.
“Look at you, you’re soaking wet. Let’s see if Barnie has a towel you can borrow so you don’t get your upholstery wet.”
“Mom, please listen to me.”
They had approached the warehouse where Barnie, wearing striped pajamas and a robe, was sitting in his wheelchair. Maddie started to put her thoughts together, but Mom cut her off.
“Baby, I love you, you know that?” Maddie nodded, and Mom tightened her hold. “And your mother knows best. That man is nothing but trouble. I never objected to you being with Wayne, because we knew his family. He was a good man who took care of you.”
Chase’s words about his recklessness filtered through her mind. She pushed them away. “I’m not in love with Chase.” She hoped the words didn’t sound as empty as she thought they did.
“Maybe not, but you’re infatuated with him, or with this idea that Wayne sent him. Don’t turn to a stranger to heal your broken heart, Baby. That’s what your family is for.”
When Mom went into the warehouse to get a towel, Maddie looked toward the sailboat. She couldn’t see Chase, which was probably a good thing. She wrapped her arms around herself, feeling chilled for the first time since getting into the water.
Maybe Colleen was right. Maybe she couldn’t change the way things were.
CHAPTER 10
Once Maddie arrived home, her mom sat on the couch and focused on the television. Dad sat in his easy chair. He nodded at her when she plopped down on the other end of the couch but didn’t say anything. As though she always tore out of the house like that.
“Well, aren’t you going to say something?” she asked at last, unable to bear the silence.
Mom didn’t take her gaze from the television, even though there was only a commercial on. She just twirled one red curl over and over. “There’s nothing to talk about, hon. If you lied, I have nothing to say to you. If you didn’t, well, there’s still nothing to talk about.”
Nothing changed around there. She wondered what they’d say if she told them she nearly made love to that gorgeous stranger. Bet Mom would say something then.
“I’m going to go to sleep. G’night.”
Mom had cleaned and rearranged her room again. Everything on the dresser was aligned, clean clothes put away. Maddie arranged them back into their disarray, just because. She looked at her room, at the calico curtains and matching comforter, the angels hanging from the ceiling and on every flat surface. Her room hadn’t changed since she’d lived ther
e before marrying Wayne. Mom had left it intact for the occasional relative who stopped into town for a visit.
She picked up the stuffed angel doll sitting against her pillows and plucked at the lace. Reverend Hislope was right. God wasn’t going to send an angel to heal her heart. She opened the bottom drawer of her dresser and set the angel doll inside. Then she took each of her porcelain figurines and set them in there, too. Lastly, she climbed up on her bed, took down the mobile of floating angels, and put them away.
Something broke loose inside her, and she felt awash in a bittersweet feeling of freedom.
When she faced her reflection above the dresser, she noticed a particular gleam in her eyes. Not guilt exactly. The corner of her mouth tilted up, a mouth that was a little pinker than when she’d left. It only took that thought to ignite memories of Chase’s mouth on hers. Following that came the feel of his hands on her skin and the way his body felt plastered against hers.
“You’re a sex fiend,” she whispered, then let her forehead fall forward to hit the mirror. She’d never been kissed like that, though she hated to admit that. She’d never thought herself a sex fiend either, even though she and Wayne had had a healthy love life.
And the one man who made her feel that way was off-limits. She already knew she’d have a fight on her hands if she returned to the marina tomorrow. And no one was going to believe that she was going anywhere else.
Giving in was the sensible choice, the one she was expected to make. And that’s exactly what she was going to do.
The next morning Maddie put on the pajamas with the muffins and coffee cups print and went out to the living room. She hadn’t brushed her hair since her shower last night. The smell of strawberry muffins filled the room.
She found the pink comforter still folded at the end of the couch and pulled it around her. Then she turned on the television and stared at it without focusing.
Mom came out of the kitchen and stopped. Then smiled. “Baby.” She went back and came over with a muffin on a plate. “Strawberry this morning.” She went into the bathroom and returned with a brush. “Hope you didn’t catch a cold from your little dip last night. You remember how easily you used to catch colds.”
“Used to, Mom. Not anymore.”
Every muscle in her body twitched to jump up and scream, but she held herself still while Mom brushed her hair.
“Isn’t it nice to have everything back to the way it was?” Mom said. “Eat your muffin, hon.”
Nice to be back the way it was?
Colleen walked in, holding her mug ready to be filled with coffee. “Now, there’s a sight I expect. Feeling back to normal?” Instead of giving Maddie a hard time about moping, Colleen was smiling.
Maddie’s fingers tightened on the comforter as she made a horrible realization: her family was dysfunctional! They liked her better when she was depressed and dependent.
Mom grabbed Colleen’s mug and returned a minute later with fresh coffee. Dad walked in and said, “Morning, pumpkin. Morning, Colleen. Gotta go. Try and have a good day, hear?” He kissed her on the head, gave Colleen a squeeze on the shoulder and took the travel mug full of banana nut coffee on the way out. Even he looked happy to see her on the couch again!
She watched him pull out of the garage and dump his coffee on the flowers by the mailbox before driving off. This time Mom was watching, too.
“Doesn’t it bother you, him dumping out the coffee every day?”
“Mm?” Mom blinked and looked at her. “Does what bother me? Eat your muffin, and if you want, we can bake some cookies later.”
Colleen glanced out the window, then leaned out the door and yelled, “Bye, Quigley! Have a good day!”
Maddie shot up off the couch and got tangled in the comforter. “Q! Call him Q. And I don’t want to be called Baby anymore. I want you to call me Maddie!” Finally, she freed herself from the dratted thing and tossed it on the couch. “I’m going to work on Barnie’s boat with Chase. Instead of worrying about me or being mad that I’m still seeing him, be happy that I’m not sitting there moping on the couch. Be happy for me.” She looked at Colleen. “If you want me to watch Q this afternoon, ask the school to drop him at the marina. Otherwise, take the afternoon off and spend some time with your son. Ask him how he feels about his given name and those trolls. Then send him over here and spend some time with your husband. Ask him how he feels, period.”
“Quite a scene last night,” Barnie said. He was still wearing faded blue pajamas, and he’d parked his wheelchair at the outer edge of the warehouse to catch the slash of dawn light coming around the side of the building.
Chase had been working on the boat for a half-hour already. “Guess so.”
“You didn’t have anything to do with Maddie being wet, did you?”
The old guy knew something, what with that gleam in his eyes. But Chase wasn’t about to compromise her integrity. “I don’t go around pushing women in the water if that’s what you mean.”
Barnie harrumphed but didn’t press the subject. He wheeled closer to the hull, moving his hand back and forth to check the layup. “Nice and smooth.”
“Fair layup saves a lot of time later.”
“Seems weird, you knowing about that and not who you are.”
“Kind of frustrating, really.”
He kept working as he talked with Barnie. He was nearly done with the second layer. Today he hoped he could finish the fiberglass outside skin. He didn’t like talking about his memory loss. He felt like half a person when others knew. Except around Maddie.
“Doubt she’s going to be coming around,” Barnie said, as though reading his mind. Or face.
Chase wondered if his expression gave away the disappointment. “Me, too. Her mother made it pretty clear how she felt about Maddie hanging around me.”
“Never been much of a rebel, especially where her mom’s concerned.” Barnie rolled his chair to the stern and ran his fingers along the edge. “She’s a special gal.”
Chase couldn’t help the smile. “Yeah, that she is.” And last night in his arms, she’d proven she was a special woman, too. A passionate woman. Damn all his good intentions about treating her like a sister.
“What are you going to do after you finish this boat?” Barnie asked.
“Got to move on.” Chase kept his focus on smoothing out the area he was working on. “Now you know why.”
“To find who you are.”
“Right.”
“What about Maddie?”
That question stopped him. He hadn’t thought about his leaving being equated to leaving Maddie. He glanced out to the bay that caught the pink glow of the sky. “She’s still in love with her dead husband. But she’ll eventually get over him and move on, too. Find somebody here to fall in love with.”
Barnie nodded, though it was obvious that wasn’t the answer he’d been looking for. “If you ever come around to our town again, I’d be mighty pleased to give you a job.”
Chase felt a surge of gratitude. “Thanks.”
Barnie turned his wheelchair around. “Sail material came in late yesterday. Fortunately, that’s something I can do even in this blamed thing.” He wheeled to the back of the warehouse to a heavy-duty sewing machine and a large swath of canvas. “You can be the first to test-drive this baby when it’s ready. I sure as heck can’t do it.”
The prospect of sailing made his heart beat faster. He thought of something else that made his heart beat faster: Maddie. Every few minutes he caught himself glancing up to see if she was approaching. She’d surprised him last night. Course, he’d surprised himself. Everything had seemed so natural once she’d kissed him. They’d come together as though they’d been doing it forever. Strange considering that as far as Chase was concerned, he’d never made love to a woman before.
Physically he might have. He figured he had to be about twenty-eight or so, enough time to have had a woman or three. But mentally, emotionally…he’d never touched a woman. Naïve Maddie knew
more about sex than he did.
Not that it mattered. He had no business getting involved with her on that level when he had a life waiting for him somewhere. Though he didn’t have a wedding ring, he could have a significant other.
Not only had his body been charged since kissing Maddie, his brain’s synapses had been charged, too. More memories had returned, pieces of a life he wasn’t sure he liked.
“Hi,” a familiar, heart-warming voice said beside him.
This was the kiss-off, the big goodbye. Then why was he smiling even before he looked up to see her standing there in an old T-shirt cinched at the bottom and jean shorts?
Once their gazes met, he couldn’t pull away. She swallowed and looked at the boat. “You’ve been busy.”
“Yep.” How could this waif steal away his words by just standing there? “Didn’t think I’d see you today.”
Her smile faded. “I think my family’s happier when I’m not. Does that sound crazy?”
“No. They like taking care of you.” He glanced around the corner of the boat to make sure Barnie wasn’t within earshot. “Barnie asked if you were with me last night. I told him no.”
“Good. No need to start any rumors.”
“Maddie, about last night…”
“Let’s…not talk about it, okay? It shouldn’t have happened. Maybe it was just the allure of being in the water in the dark. Let’s just stay…friends.” She rubbed her hands together. “What can I do?”
She was staying, standing up for herself. And in a way, for him. So, they’d stay friends. It was enough. It was perfect. He started her on the last section. He had no business wanting her when he had no past, and she had too much of one.
Once they’d dispensed with the subject of last night, they fell into their easy pace. She wandered over to see what Barnie was working on for a few minutes, and Chase caught himself glancing over at her. She still looked like that innocent waif, and it clashed with the memories of the woman he’d held in his arms.
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