Zero

by R. E. Carr

  Georgia yawned and stretched. The night sky remained dreadfully black. As she flipped her hair out of her eyes, she noticed Arthur staring at her face. “What?” she asked.

  “You simply reminded me of someone, from long ago, but she was far superior.”

  “Great,” Georgia said with an eye roll.

  “She knew how to be a lady, to wear dresses and have long, flowing locks,” Arthur sniffed. “She was a queen.”

  “Ahh, that must be Guinevere,” Georgia sighed. “I’m surprised it took so long for her to come up. Was she that memorable too?”

  Arthur bared his fangs. “You will never insult my queen again,” he growled. “We were happy—”

  “If you were so happy, why did she run away?” Georgia dared to ask. “Come on, that’s what I really want to know.”

  Arthur looked away. “She didn’t run away,” he said, his voice cracking for a moment. “She was stolen from me, by a knight that I thought was my truest friend. He . . . bewitched her, as if she couldn’t even remember me. I am sure my sister was behind it. She had magic that could warp the mind of anyone . . . and she was always jealous of mine and Gwen’s happiness.”

  “Gwen? You called her Gwen?” Georgia asked.

  “I called her the love of my life, my heart, and my guiding star,” he said, now pensive. “I would have given up my kingdom for one more night with her.”

  “Your beautiful, perfect, submissive little wife who was stolen from you,” Georgia muttered.

  “Submissive, hah!” Arthur scoffed. “No, no she was . . . difficult at times. She always questioned me, made me . . . remember . . . my place.”

  Georgia chuckled. “Now she sounds perfect,” she sighed.

  After a few long moments of silence, she looked over to see Arthur staring at her strangely. She raised a brow.

  “I remember calling you a disaster once,” Arthur said, lost in thought.

  “It was one of the nicest things you ever said to me,” Georgia muttered. Now she had to look away.

  “Tell me, woman. Do you believe in fate?”

  “Nope,” she said flatly. “In fact, I don’t believe in much of anything.”

  “Come now, you have to believe in something,” Arthur chided, now leaning over and giving her an expectant look. “Come on.”

  “Fine, I believe that fate is whatever you make it.”

  Arthur smiled. “You know, I once heard that fate was your most faithful little dog. It always comes back to find you,” he said. He reached over and brushed the hair out of Georgia’s eyes. She pulled away.

  “No fate, no destiny, none of that nonsense,” she said flatly.

  “No undying love?” Arthur asked softly. Georgia became painfully aware of Arthur leaning toward her.

  “I’m getting married . . . later today,” Georgia said, sliding backward.

  “Oh come on, Steve’s a fool, and he doesn’t deserve you,” Arthur said, taking her hand. “I see the way you look at me when you think I don’t notice. You’ve talked to me all night. At first, I questioned your motives, but now, I simply do not care.”

  “You have got to be kidding me,” Georgia said as Arthur wrapped his arms around her. She tried to jerk away. He leaned in again. “No!”

  He pressed his lips against hers. Georgia submitted for a breathless second before wheeling her hand back and slapping the vampire king, managing to break free of his grasp.

  “Not just no, but hell no. You aren’t Ren,” she snapped as she jumped to her feet. “Thanks for reminding me.”

  “You’ll come running back. It is your destiny,” he said, suddenly imitating Darth Vader. Georgia paused.

  “You don’t get to make Star Wars references, you undead douchebag. I’ll see you at the wedding.”

  Georgia ran back to the house and straight to her room. It was only after she double-checked her locks and jammed her window with a candlestick that she dared flop on her bed and cry herself to sleep. She woke up just a bit before sundown with ridiculous bedhead and a growling stomach.

  “Well, shit,” she said, noticing a dress on a mannequin standing in the middle of her room. “Of course, they have keys.”

  Her eyes lit up as she saw that someone, probably Estella, had left coffee and pastries as well. She grimaced at the simple white lace dress before her. “Nothing good ever happens when I get dressed up,” she muttered.

  She was halfway through fighting with the zipper when there was a knock on the door. “May I come in?” Estella asked in her sweetest voice.

  “Sure!” Georgia called back. The vampire servant muttered something in Italian as she rushed in to save the day. Georgia tried her best to stay out of her own way as Estella went to work.

  “Do you like it? It was one of my older numbers. I let it out . . . a lot.”

  Georgia blushed. Estella kept working. “Women are so much taller now!” Estella added quickly. Georgia let out a sigh of relief.

  “You need shoes . . . and something with the hair. Hmm, do we still do veils in human weddings?” Estella clucked her tongue and shook her head at the bride-to-be. “I’ll be back. Oh, paperwork is on its way.”

  “Paperwork?” Georgia called after her. A few minutes later, one of the many beefy guys that worked for Klaus came in with a folder and pen.

  “Don’t worry, we took care of everything. Perfectly legal,” he said in broken English.

  “Excuse me?” Georgia said as she was handed some documents, all in Italian. The man pointed to the open line. “Sign with the name over here.”

  “Georgianna Soriano?” she asked.

  “It’s just your name in Italian,” he said. Georgia scribbled her same unreadable signature on the line. The servant’s eyes lit up. “Good, good, now I go buy the judge!”

  “Buy the judge?” Georgia repeated as the servant left. She then shrugged and started pacing around the room until she caught sight of something long and dark on her carpet. She bent over and picked up a very long, jet-black hair.

  She looked around again. “I hope that fell off me,” she said as her stomach turned. “Freaky-ass vampire bullshit!”

  Just as she was about to totally freak out, Estella returned with a wreath of flowers and a pair of pumps. Once more Georgia found herself primped over, as her heart sank in her chest.

  “This is so sudden, but it will certainly do!” Estella said. “I had hoped to wear this for Geoffrey one day.”

  “What an image,” Georgia said. “So, you guys managed to plan a little shindig overnight?”

  Estella looked genuinely hurt. “We serve vampires - acquiescing to capricious, last-minute requests is what we do best,” she said. Georgia sighed and nodded in agreement.

  “Still, you didn’t have to go all-out,” Georgia said, as she saw fairy lights and roses strewn around the courtyard.

  “Oh no, our instructions were quite explicit. The whole staff was ordered to work through the night, spare no effort. We need to impress the lords in attendance,” Estella explained.

  “Well, good job. This really feels like a special night,” Georgia said weakly. “When is it all getting started?”

  “My master told me to escort you to the lounge, and once the young master and the guests are ready, we’ll begin. I should have asked, are you Catholic? Did I need to get a priest?”

  Georgia waved her hands. “No, definitely not Catholic. Is that . . . a problem?” she asked.

  “No, I suppose not. We do have a local judge who tends to be more agreeable than the priests. I’ll take care of everything, you just sit here . . . relax . . . have some wine.”

  “Wine!” Georgia said. “I don’t care if it’s after breakfast.”

  She had just made it through her first cup when the door opened to the lounge. Georgia found herself face-to-face with a concerned-looking Klaus. “Did I stall him long enough?” she asked.

  Klaus nodded. “Congratulations on your happy day. You’ll find your presents in my son’s room after the ceremony. I als
o hope you’ll join me for breakfast. It will be at daybreak, if you don’t mind. Old habits die hard.”

  “We’ll be there,” Georgia said, confused. “Any other cryptic advice?”

  “Stay out of trouble, please. I have a feeling that the king will have other matters to attend to after tonight, so do your best not to turn his attentions your way; and whatever you do, don’t tell anyone where you decide to go on your honeymoon,” Klaus said with a mysterious smile.

  “Freaky-ass vampire bullshit, part two,” Georgia muttered under her breath. Klaus smiled slightly, but said nothing. Instead he looked at his watch.

  “I will go see if our guests are ready. Are you sure you don’t want a nice, long Catholic ceremony?” he asked innocently.

  “I can only do so much to distract King Arthur the vampire,” Georgia said flatly.

  “Very well,” Klaus said, heading out the door.

  “It’s not real,” Georgia muttered. “Just a big old distraction . . . except for that whole Jaeger writ thing. Yeah.”

  She tapped her feet, paced around and fiddled with her sleeves. It was after about the tenth lap from the sofa to the TV that she heard someone clear their throat. “Who now?” she asked.

  “Damn, Florida . . . Little Bro does not deserve you,” Bam-Yin said as he slipped out of the shadows. He stared pointedly at Georgia’s neckline framed in antique lace. “Hey, I don’t know what you did, but Arthur looks . . . vexed, if you know what I mean.”

  “I was just my usual charming self,” she muttered. As Bam-Yin grew closer she could see red splotches on his normally pristine white cuffs. “Bob, is everything OK?”

  He shook his head even as he said, “Everything is fine. Now if you’ll excuse me, Florida, I have to go give my little brother a good luck kiss before the wedding. It’s, um, an ancient vampire tradition.”

  “Kiss Steve . . . on purpose?” Georgia asked.

  “Hey, you’re the one marrying him, Florida,” Bam-Yin muttered. He turned and gave her a little bow. “I just want you to know now that whatever happens, I’m not entirely sure that I’ll be in control of myself. However, I’ve survived a long time being hunted by vampires much older and stronger than me, and I am exceptionally good at being the ingratiating asshole that the big, scary lords ignore.”

  “Why does this feel suspiciously like goodbye?” Georgia asked. Bam-Yin gave her another bow. “Bob?”

  “Oh, I am occasionally a very, very stupid little vampire,” he said softly. “If you ever find my mom alive out there, tell her I always knew I’d be the disappointment. Can you do that, Florida?”

  “Your mom?”

  “Her name is . . . was . . . Su Min Lung. I recently learned she wasn’t as dead as previously thought,” he said. “Like I said, I have a date with your fiancé. Take care of yourself, Florida.”

  Bam-Yin slipped out of sight. The next time the door opened, Georgia could just see a shadow move out of the corner of her eye. Klaus entered the room again.

  “Are you ready? We have all the lords in the courtyard. If you are, I’ll get Steven—”

  “Just give me a minute,” she said, wringing her hands. “Like five minutes.”

  Klaus stood in her doorway, eerily passive. After an awkward minute Georgia offered up, “You were right, King Arthur does love to talk about himself.”

  “Some things never change,” Klaus sighed. “Did he say or do anything unusual?”

  “You mean other than try to kiss me?” Georgia asked. Klaus raised a brow. “You were there, back then, right?”

  Klaus remained dreadfully silent. Georgia pressed on.

  “Anything important I should know?”

  “He tried to . . . kiss you?” Klaus asked. “Already?”

  “Yeah, I’m getting the impression that I remind him of someone. Would that have anything to do with this whole marrying me off to Steve thing, or am I just being a stupid human?”

  “You’re not being a stupid human,” Klaus said. “As I said to someone else once, it is in the best interests of everyone to keep you close by, but unobtainable to Arthur for as long as possible. The more energy he wastes on you—”

  “The more time you have to plot and plan,” Georgia finished. “Great, I’m Arthur bait. I get it. No matter how hard Steve tried . . . I think there is some part deep within that thing that remembers me.”

  “I hope that is not true, for your sake. Arthur was a trifle . . . obsessive.”

  “Did Arthur’s sister really use magic to help Lancelot steal Guinevere away?” Georgia asked. “Cause that’s kinda Arthur’s side of the story.”

  “Do you think that Arthur, King of Vampires, would believe that his wife would run off with his servant when she could have him?” Klaus asked. “I was not privy to all the details, but I can say for certain that it was not Arthur’s name that the queen whispered on her deathbed.”

  “I see.”

  “Just a few more hours,” Klaus said. “Arthur may end up with some hurt pride, but I have confidence that he won’t cause too much of a scene. He is still alone here and building power. We just need to stall long enough, and the others will escape. Believe me, Arthur is an arrogant man, but he is not a capricious nor foolish one.”

  “You’re that sure that a few thousand years and coming back from the dead won’t change a guy?” Georgia asked with a pathetic laugh.

  “Not that much. Now, have you stalled long enough?” Klaus asked, looking at his watch again. Georgia took one more nervous lap around the room. Klaus reassured her again, “It’s still Arthur. I have to believe that he can be reasoned with, and that he is not fully in control yet. This is merely posturing.”

  “Are you trying to convince me . . . or yourself?” Georgia muttered as she finally walked to the door. “All right, let’s get this over with.”

  “Just a little show, to piss off an ancient vampire king,” she mumbled to herself as she walked down the now quiet halls. “In the body of my one true love, who was worried about going insane,” she finished as Klaus left her by the courtyard. “And I’m marrying . . . Steve. Words I thought I’d never, ever say.”

  She craned her neck to see a little makeshift trellis set up in the courtyard. The entire affair consisted of the Jaeger and Arthur standing to one side, while the house staff stood on the other. A little path of petals marked the way for Georgia to meet up with a bushy-haired older gentleman in a suit. She let out a sigh of relief, as she didn’t see any cups lying around, nor any sign of the werewolf contingent being discovered.

  “Well howdy, Florida,” Bam-Yin said as he flickered into view next to her, sans bloodstained hoodie. He gave her a deep sigh and a sideways glance. “Damn, Little Bro does not deserve you,” he said, eyeing her neckline.

  Georgia furrowed her brows. Bam-Yin leaned over and whispered, “Hey, I don’t know what you did, but Arthur looks . . . vexed, if you know what I mean.”

  “Ever get that feeling of déjà vu?” Georgia asked. Bam-Yin responded by snatching some carnations out of a vase in the hall and shoving them into her hands. He winked.

  “You feel like you’ve married Steve before. I’m so sorry,” Bam-Yin said. “Come on, let’s put some effort into this. They got you into a dress and everything.”

  There was a slight commotion as Klaus escorted a tired-looking Steve out of the other side of the courtyard. He shuffled uncomfortably, tugging on his tie, and adjusting the cuffs on his classic, three-piece suit. Steve had even ditched his usual fedora in favor of neatly slicked-back hair.

  “Aww, he made an effort,” Bam-Yin said, taking her arm.

  “Are you really walking me down the aisle, Bob?” she asked, raising a brow.

  “Got someone else in mind? What says timeless romance quite like a vampire escort?”

  Georgia sighed. Bam-Yin gave a thumbs-up to the concerned looking Estella, who was standing on the far left with an older, clunky boom box. Bam-Yin nodded again and the other vampire pressed play.

  “If it’
s Europe’s “The Final Countdown”, I’m going back to my room,” Georgia warned her escort. She let out a sigh of relief as a scratchy recording of a more traditional bridal number echoed through the courtyard. She stood at the edge of the path smiling uncomfortably as the guests turned to face her. A pair of painfully familiar green eyes stared at her.

  Arthur looked her up and down. Once more, his left hand betrayed him, balling into a fist as he saw Georgia in a wedding dress. Georgia made the mistake of making eye contact. A lump rose in her throat.

  Bam-Yin nudged her. She put her game face on and walked down the aisle. She made it to Steve a few beats after the wedding march faded. She could still catch a green-eyed stare out of the corner of her eye. Steve’s hand trembled as she took it. He leaned over and whispered, “We’ve got this, Sweetheart.”

  Georgia’s fake smile widened. Klaus stepped forward and simply stated, “My son has requested a human ceremony in public, to honor his bride. The other ceremony will be private and later tonight. Thank you for your consideration.”

  Klaus then gave a little nod to the officiant. Georgia couldn’t quite contain all her shock. Her expression only grew more strained as the judge began spewing out nothing but Italian. After a particularly long passage, Georgia became painfully aware of everyone staring expectantly at her. The judge cleared his throat and gave her an expectant little nod.

  “I . . . do?” she offered weakly. Steve let out a sigh of relief.

  The judge launched into the same spiel. Steve gave a quick glance over to the impassive Arthur before saying, “Sí.”

  Georgia panicked for a moment as she tried to figure out what to do next. Fortunately, Bam-Yin leaned back over to her and slipped something into her hand. She rolled a plain gold band between her fingers.

  “Please don’t tell me I needed vows,” she hissed as softly as she could. Steve gave her a helpless look as well, as the audience stared. She could hear a snicker coming from the direction of Arthur. Georgia gritted her teeth, grabbed Steve’s finger and shoved the ring onto it.

  “I’ll take him,” she said, as he too jammed a ring on her hand.

  “Yeah, I’ll take her,” he said. He swept Georgia into his arms and kissed her with enough chutzpah to make her swoon just a little. They heard something in Italian behind them. She only caught the last little bit of “Georgiana y Stefano DeMarco!”