Call of the Lycan (Secrets of the Sequoia Book 3)

by Deidre Huesmann

  He had tried so hard to just forget about her. Once Vera slumped lifeless into his arms, Holden knew he’d have to put Rachael out of his mind.

  But it was so difficult. She meant so much to him; being his only true human friend in decades, showing him sweetness and compassion even when he hadn’t deserved it. She eventually would have forgiven him for hiding the wolf’s tooth that proved Jackson’s innocence of murder. But now....

  Holden shook his head violently and glanced at his watch. He didn’t have time for this. Two o’clock drew nearer and he still had one week left at work.

  Quickly he undressed and threw on his only pair of slacks and a polo shirt. Soon he wouldn’t have to wear the clothes that reminded him far too much of his alpha. Holden thirsted for that day.

  His studio apartment hadn’t held much in the first place, but after his frantic packing it looked almost like a monk’s room. No pictures, no clothes in the laundry, no baked goods cooling on the counter. The refrigerator was nearly empty and he kept rotating through his two sets of work clothes, two T-shirts, and one pair of jeans.

  He’d have to travel light and he’d have to travel soon. Holden gave Rachael maybe another month before she told Aaron about his visit out of some ill-perceived threat. And then he’d give Aaron another week to break down camp and come after him like a bloodhound.

  And he hadn’t threatened her. Holden didn’t like that he had to keep reminding himself of that, but in his heart he knew it was true. He would never hurt Rachael. But he didn’t even want her thinking of becoming a lycan now that her best friend was dead. So he’d said the only thing that would serve as sufficient warning.

  But, a part of him admitted, if she did choose that life it would only be right to kill her.

  Holden prayed it wouldn’t come to that. He had high hopes. Rachael might be upset, but she wasn’t an idiot. She wouldn’t take Aaron’s offer to become a lycan even if he held her life in his selfish hands.

  He slammed the door to his apartment with renewed determination. He could do this. He could bide his time before he came for Ana Sofia’s life. Then Jackson’s, and then Nathan’s, and then finally Aaron’s. He could.

  Because he had to.

  The weather at Rolling Fields Golf Course was abysmal for the sport. There were more players on the driving range than the course. They seemed to want to avoid the gray clouds that were so inflated they threatened to burst.

  Holden ducked inside the main shop and stopped by the bar to say hello Lacey. Like Rachael, she was human. Unlike Rachael, she was exuberant and always in some short skirt or another. “It gets me more tips,” she’d once told him brazenly.

  A big smile greeted him from an otherwise empty bar. “Hi, sweetie.” Lacey leaned over the counter and planted a noisy kiss on his cheek. “It’s slow today. Boss says we may close early.”

  “That sucks,” murmured Holden. Since he had a few minutes before his shift he took a seat on a barstool and ordered a Coke.

  Lacey shrugged as she set a dewy glass before him. “Eh, I didn’t do too bad this morning. Not like my roommate. Her night sucked.”

  She’d mentioned sharing an apartment once or twice before. Holden pulled the straw out of his glass and took a sip. “Yeah?” He was never particularly interested in anything Lacey had to say, but at least talking to her passed time. She was harmless enough, even if her top plunged far too low for his tastes.

  “Her favorite customer spilled a drink on her. She says it was on purpose, but knowing Vivi she exaggerated a little.”

  Holden frowned. “Didn’t you say their uniform was mostly white?”

  Lacey nodded. “The girls, yeah. And her dress is all red now.”

  That was an easy fix. “Tell her to soak it in vinegar and salt.”

  “Yeah, well, she’s more upset about Aaron than the dress.”

  Holden froze.

  Apparently she didn’t notice his change in demeanor. “She was spittin’ mad, though. Stomped around the house yelling about some ‘underage blonde prom princess bimbo.’” She shook her head, bemused. “Guess Aaron was on a date. Too bad. Vivi said he always tipped well. I mean, before last night. He stiffed her this time.”

  Holden forced himself to calm down. His alpha had a relatively common name. No reason to panic. “Weird. I know an Aaron who is also rude and creepy to girls,” he said off-handedly.

  A tiny frown dotted Lacey’s plush lips. “She never said he was rude, even after all that. But she’s had a serious crush on him for... I guess a couple years, since he first came to her work?” She rolled her eyes. “Ugh. It was like living with a high schooler, I swear. Writing her name with his on her notes and stuff. ‘Genevieve Moreno’ and ‘heart Mrs. Vivi Moreno heart.’ I guess I’m glad he upset her. Maybe she’ll move on, you know?”

  No. No way. Holden gripped his glass until his fingers ached.

  He refused to believe Rachael was stupid enough to go on a date with Aaron. Maybe she had fallen for a lot of his lies, but she knew firsthand how dangerous he was. It wasn’t possible. It had to be some other blonde Aaron had taken a liking to.

  But, a jealous part of him admitted, Aaron had possessed a soft spot for Rachael from the moment they’d met. He’d gone so far as to call her a “little ray of sunshine.” He’d put her name as Sunshine in his cell phone. Toward the end of Holden and Rachael’s romance, she had taken to defending Aaron simply because he’d taken care of her brother.

  Holden felt sick. It was entirely possible his worst fear had come true.

  He didn’t realize he crushed the glass until Lacey cried out. Holden stared down at his bloodied hand in a daze. So strange, he thought, how the situation had turned so badly on him.

  Perhaps he’d have to kill Aaron a lot sooner than he’d thought.

  Chapter Five

  Going to school had become strictly mechanical. Rachael focused entirely on her classwork and avoided those she had once called friends. Since Vera’s death they seemed perfectly content to return the favor. Even Shawna did little more than nod at her in the hallways.

  It made the day drag, but Rachael managed to keep numb with fewer reminders of her fallen friend.

  Normally after class she would have gone to visit Jackson. Today she couldn’t. Her house was in far too much disarray. When she’d left that morning her father had been asleep on the couch with empty cans scattered around the living room. His collection had been accumulating for at least a week now.

  Rachael didn’t think she could do much for him, but she could at the very least clean. So the moment she arrived home she tossed her backpack and coat into her room. Then she kicked off her shoes and set to task.

  Homework wouldn’t get done that night, she knew. The living room, spotless in the years her mother had lived, looked as though a drunken college party had passed through—minus the vomit, at least. The kitchen wasn’t quite as bad, but there was food stuck to the counter that had to be at least two weeks old. A couple dishes in the sink had mold creeping along the porcelain.

  Despite the disgusting aroma, Rachael was relieved to finally get around to cleaning. With each garbage bag she filled, a sense of home started to seep in again. She’d missed the feeling terribly.

  Especially since Aaron won’t let you get infected, the nastier part of her mind taunted.

  Grimly, Rachael took to the kitchen with soap, water, and a sponge and scrubbed as though the floor was her brain. It was surprisingly cathartic. She took her attitude through every linoleum tile in the house, even the master bathroom.

  Dusk fell while she vacuumed. Nighttime was well underway as she dusted shelves, and it was close to midnight when she began to wash the inside of the windows. Her father had yet to return home, but she wasn’t concerned. It was probably a late night for him.

  Rachael had opened the last set of blinds when a movement outside caught her attention. Rachael blinked, but saw nothing else. She shook her head, shielded her eyes, and peered out again. Only the inky blac
k of night stared back at her.

  Then the faint howl of a wolf sent chills down her spine.

  Just a coincidence, she assured herself. There were plenty of wolves in the area and they had nothing to do with lycans.

  But her gut twisted in knots. Someone was out there.

  Rachael swiped furiously at the windows. Grime and dirt clung to the outside panes, but she had no interest going out in the dead of night to clean them.

  She closed the last blind and headed back to the kitchen to wash up. A glance at the oven clock told her she needed to be in bed soon. Tomorrow was a school day, but given the hour Rachael wasn’t certain she’d make it there.

  She would definitely leave the house before her father woke. Rachael didn’t actually feel good about that fact, given his recent penchant for drinking. It meant he could sleep all day and not notice whether she was home.

  Tiredly, she climbed the stairs and flicked the light on in her room. Just as she raised her gaze toward her welcoming bed, she froze.

  Holden sat on her covers. He stared at her, his expression blank.

  Rachael felt faint.

  “You’re up late,” he said softly.

  Her first thought was to run, but her legs didn’t want to cooperate. It was as though she was stuck in a nightmare where her feet had sunk into the floor. She couldn’t move. Her breath became short and quick.

  Holden frowned and stood. “Don’t do that,” he said. “I’m not here to hurt you.” He approached her, staring directly into her eyes with sharp scrutiny. “It’s not like you’re a lycan.”

  His breath washed warmly over her face. A mix of confusing emotions encompassed her. She remembered his gentle kiss that had once swept her up in waves of joy. At the same time the scent of his mouth made her feel violently ill.

  “Get out,” she choked pathetically.

  Holden shook his head. “We need to talk.”

  She didn’t want to. But Rachael couldn’t form the words. She inwardly screamed for her feet to unglue from the floor yet they stubbornly remained.

  Her former love gave her his familiar crooked smile. It was unsettling how boyish and normal it made him seem. “Come on, Ray. Just for a few minutes and then I promise to go.”

  Even if she ran, he was much faster. Rachael inhaled shakily and nodded.

  With alarming ease, Holden took her hand and led her back to the bed. He eased her down onto a spot next to him so their knees touched. The warmth emanating from that touch jolted her in the worst way. She found herself staring down at his well-worn jeans and swallowing to keep her terrified nausea in check.

  Silence stretched on uncomfortably. Rachael forced herself to look up and saw Holden was still staring at her. His expression was soft and his intense green-blue eyes were unusually calm, very unlike the crashing ocean waves they often reminded her of.

  “You’re beautiful tonight,” he said.

  In spite of herself Rachael gave a short, derisive laugh. Aside from the fact she’d spend hours cleaning and had to be a ragged mess, a part of her couldn’t believe he had the audacity to attempt flattery.

  “Just say what you want to say,” she spat, surprised at her venom. “That means nothing to me. Vera was beautiful, but you made sure she can’t share it anymore.”

  The kindness in his gaze violently closed off. “I don’t expect you to understand why I did what I did.”

  “Good. Because I don’t want to.”

  “But,” he continued fiercely. “I can promise you it was necessary. In a few decades, when you can put this behind you, maybe you’ll get it.”

  The callous way he shrugged off Vera’s life only served to infuriate her further. Rachael bit down hard on her lower lip until she tasted blood.

  Holden closed his eyes and let out a short growl. “Anyway, that’s not why I came here.”

  “So tell me,” she said stiffly.

  He straightened his shoulders as though steeling himself for an arduous task. His eyes flew open and they were bright with skepticism. “Did you really go on a date with Aaron?”

  It took her a moment to realize that he had somehow found out. The fear started to trickle back in. How had he known? Aaron had promised he would be on high alert and he’d never said a word about noticing his former charge.

  “Of course not,” she retorted. Yet her cheeks flamed as she recalled that embarrassing night.

  But Holden wasn’t prepared to take her statement at face value. “Then why are you blushing?” he demanded. His grip on her hands tightened until Rachael winced. “I know you went out with him. Why?”

  “Let go,” she protested, trying to tug her hands free.

  Holden refused. “Why were you out with him?”

  “I wanted to get away,” she lied through clenched teeth. “So we had dinner. It wasn’t a big deal.”

  Coldness flowed through his touch even though his body ran hot. Holden snapped, “Funny how every time you do something wrong with him it’s not supposed to be a big deal.”

  Shortly before their falling out, Holden had exploded on her in a jealous rage. Aaron had given her a ride home and promised to do everything he could to Jackson’s life. Rachael had hugged him out of overwhelming gratitude. But even though she’d taken a shower between instant and Holden coming over that same night he claimed he’d been able to smell his former alpha on her.

  The moment he’d backed her into a wall and snarled at her had been the beginning of her terror. The young man she had considered her first love turned into a frightening stranger. Murdering Vera had simply sealed her opinion of him.

  Rachael yanked her hands again and this time he released her. She scooted away on the bed. “I never did anything wrong,” she said flatly. “You just decided I did. There’s a difference, Holden.”

  He scowled. “You’re objectively wrong. That’s the difference.”

  “Did you just come here to ask if I was dating him?” she snapped. “Because you got your answer and you said you’d leave. So leave.”

  “Don’t even think about being with him, Rachael,” he said ominously. “It won’t end well for you.”

  She leapt to her feet. Rachael didn’t know where her rush of assertiveness was coming from, but it was certainly handy. “Right, because you’re going to kill me.”

  “No, only if you’re a lycan,” he reminded her. His eyes shone with honesty. “If you really want to date him that bad, just... trust me, don’t. It won’t end well.”

  “Maybe I’ll just leave the opinions of men in my life to Jackie and my dad.”

  “Jackson’s biased and your dad’s become an alcoholic. Besides, you won’t have to worry about either of them if Aaron’s dead.”

  Shock doused her. Rachael stared at him, her mouth agape. “What... killing him? Have you completely lost your mind?” she asked shrilly. “You can’t just threaten to kill everybody who makes you mad!”

  Her outrage was met with a roll of his eyes. “I know that. It’s just Aaron.”

  Yeah, he had definitely gone insane. Rachael pointed to her door, narrowing her eyes. “Get out of my house,” she hissed. “And don’t bother coming back unless you get your brain fixed.” Though after all this she wasn’t certain she’d welcome him anyway.

  Holden rose. The motion wasn’t casual like it used to be; this time he was icy and fluid with an aura ringing of abject darkness.

  For someone who hated Aaron so much, he moved an awful lot like him. Was it their lycan nature or the shift in Holden’s mindset?

  “Fine,” he said shortly. He advanced on her. “But listen first. I know you’re in a rough spot and that’s all this is. I still love you, Ray. I’m only trying to look out for you.”

  And then, to Rachael’s horror, he pressed his lips hard against hers. Her muscles locked up and refused to react. When he pulled away and gazed at her tenderly, she swallowed. It took every ounce of willpower she possessed not to wipe her mouth. No easy task; her lips felt slimy after that kiss.

&n
bsp; “I’ll come back in a few years,” he promised. “Just don’t get infected. Time will give you a lot of perspective. Trust me on that.”

  Perhaps it was her racing heart, but it sounded like a threat to Rachael.

  Either oblivious to or uncaring of her discomfort, Holden said, “It’d be nice to come back and see you’ve gone to college. I bet there’s plenty you can do. Didn’t I mention I always wanted to be a chef?” He sighed wistfully. “Too bad. I mean, I could, but I wouldn’t get far before I had to move and change my identity. I wouldn’t be too successful.”

  Oh god, why was he still here? Rachael felt disconnected from her body, like she was watching an incredibly creepy suspense movie. She just blinked at him.

  Taking her silence as some sort of acceptance, Holden grinned at her again. “Anyway. I gotta go. I’ll be leaving town soon. Can’t tell you when or where I’m going—no offense—but I’ll be back as soon as I can. If you’re not here, don’t worry. I’ll find you.”

  All she could manage to whisper was, “I bet you will.”

  Holden nodded. “Thanks for talking to me. For giving me this chance. I appreciate it.”

  Like I had a choice, thought Rachael. Aloud she murmured, “Please lock the door when you go.”

  “No problem.” Holden leaned forward. Rachael cringed, but he was merciful and planted the barest of kisses on her forehead.

  “Bye, Ray,” he said softly. Then he walked around her and out her bedroom door as though it was the most natural thing in the world.

  Rachael didn’t feel she could breathe until the front door closed with a note of finality. Then she collapsed to the floor, all her pent-up emotions spilling forth in a wretched sob. She couldn’t explain precisely why, or how, but she felt extremely violated.

  Any chance of going to sleep tonight had been annihilated. And looking around her room, which had just an hour ago been her most sacred space, she knew she would never feel safe in her house again.

  Pain sliced through her arm with each desperate punch. Her knuckles began to scrape raw and a small trickle of blood made the freeing journey down her wrist. Bits of sequoia bark embedded in her wounds.