A Wolf to Set Him Free
Page 1
Nehalem Pack 11
A Wolf to Set Him Free
For the past five years Ethan Compton has lived a lonely life. After the death of his fiancé Ethan shut himself off from the rest of the world, afraid to let someone in just to watch them leave. But a trip spent visiting friends leads Ethan to the man who might just have the power to tear down the walls surrounding his fragile heart.
Holden Anders is always up for a challenge but the one in the form of Ethan proves he has his work cut out for him. Holden is beyond happy to have found his mate but he soon discovers there is a sadness in Ethan’s past he’s unsure the man can recover from. But Holden refuses to give up on him because Ethan has stolen his heart.
Death is a part of life and Ethan must come to terms with that before he lets the best thing to ever walk into his life slip away.
Genre: Alternative (M/M or F/F), Contemporary, Paranormal, Vampires/Werewolves
Length: 42,146 words
A WOLF TO SET HIM FREE
Nehalem Pack 11
AJ Jarrett
EVERLASTING CLASSIC
MANLOVE
Siren Publishing, Inc.
www.SirenPublishing.com
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A SIREN PUBLISHING BOOK
IMPRINT: Everlasting Classic ManLove
A WOLF TO SET HIM FREE
Copyright © 2014 by AJ Jarrett
E-book ISBN: 978-1-62741-619-1
First E-book Publication: April 2014
Cover design by Harris Channing
All art and logo copyright © 2014 by Siren Publishing, Inc.
ALL RIGHTS RESERVED: This literary work may not be reproduced or transmitted in any form or by any means, including electronic or photographic reproduction, in whole or in part, without express written permission.
All characters and events in this book are fictitious. Any resemblance to actual persons living or dead is strictly coincidental.
PUBLISHER
Siren Publishing, Inc.
www.SirenPublishing.com
Letter to Readers
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Table of Contents
Title Page
Copyright Page
Chapter One
Chapter Two
Chapter Three
Chapter Four
Chapter Five
Chapter Six
Chapter Seven
Chapter Eight
Chapter Nine
Chapter Ten
Chapter Eleven
Chapter Twelve
Chapter Thirteen
Chapter Fourteen
Chapter Fifteen
Chapter Sixteen
About the Author
A WOLF TO SET HIM FREE
Nehalem Pack 11
AJ JARRETT
Copyright © 2014
Chapter One
Ethan sat at the kitchen table and buttered the toast he’d made. The curtains had been pulled back over the large windows that were in front of him. The sun shined bright and caused Ethan to have to squint from the reflection off the glass.
He picked up his toast and took a bite as he watched the world outside turn ever so slowly, never stopping. Ethan couldn’t actually see it, but with the passing of the seasons he felt like he could see and feel how time slowly ticked by, not waiting for anyone. No matter how bad things got, the world never stopped turning.
Ethan dropped his toast and grabbed his napkin. The hot sting of tears burned at the back of his eyes. It was almost cruel how life just kept going when everything around Ethan felt like it was crumbling to the ground. He wiped the napkin over his eyes then tossed it on his plate.
“Five years,” he whispered to himself. “I need to find a way to move on.”
“What did you say, sweetheart?”
Ethan jumped at the sound of his mother’s voice. He’d never heard her come into the kitchen.
“Oh nothing.” Ethan stood up and put his plate in the sink. “So what are you doing today, mother?”
Ever since the episode that took place three years ago, Ethan had stayed with his parents. In the house he grew up in. It might have seemed pathetic to some, but after kidnapping a man and then attacking that man’s boyfriend, well, Ethan didn’t feel like living alone. The voices seemed louder when no one was around. The memories of the past haunted him every fucking day and being around his overprotective mother and loving father helped take the sting out of living.
“Well, your father and I were making arrangements to head out to Lake Tahoe to stay at our cabin. We were hoping you would come with.”
“In April?” Ethan took a drink from his coffee mug. “The snow won’t be great for skiing this time of year.”
“We know, it’s just…” Her voice trailed off as she looked over at the calendar that hung by the refrigerator. He knew she was well aware of the date. He understood the meaning for the impromptu trip.
“Mom, I appreciate the offer, but really, I’m fine.” Ethan drank down the rest of his coffee and set the empty cup in the sink.
“I know, sweetheart. It’s just.” His mother wrung her weathered hands together and tears filled her eyes. “I know how much you loved Jay and with each passing year, it doesn’t look like you’re getting better at accepting his death. I worry about you.”
Accepting? How was he to accept the death of the man he loved more than himself?
Ethan took a deep breath, trying to calm down the building rage coursing through his veins. His mother didn’t mean what she said to be rude but it still hurt.
“Mom, I’m not sure I’ll ever be over it. I can’t accept it because I feel like if I do then I’ll forget him.” Ethan turned around and rested his palms on the counter. The cold marble soothed the heat rushing over his body.
“Baby.” His mother rested
a warm, smooth hand over his and he turned to look at her. “Just because you move on doesn’t mean you will forget.” She gave him a small smile. “The love you two shared was special, but you have to believe that it’s not the only love you will ever have. Things happen that aren’t within our control, but as human beings, we need to grieve and let go so that we can move on. I loved Jay, too, and I know for a fact this isn’t what he’d want for you.” She gave him a watery smile. “He’d say E-Baby, get off your ass and make more memories.”
Ethan laughed. She was right. Jay would beat the shit out of Ethan if he saw him like this. But saying and doing were two different things and he just wasn’t quite there yet. Letting go of Jay seemed like closing a door on the life they shared and he wasn’t ready to do that yet.
“I love you, Mom.” Ethan pulled his mother into his arms and hugged her tight. “You and Dad should go alone and have a good time.” He pulled an arm’s length back to meet his mother’s gaze. “You and Dad deserve a break from babysitting me.” When she started to protest, Ethan held up a hand to silent her. “Don’t try to deny it. I did mess up royally, but I’m better now. You and Dad should go live it up for a few days.”
“My sweet boy.” She cupped her hands over Ethan’s cheeks. “I can’t believe we are only given one great love in this life we live. I think we just have to be open to the possibility that love will find us again.”
“Maybe you’re right, Mom, but some people also believe in signs and all signs point to that not happening for me. I’m a one man kind of guy.” He grinned at her.
“Who knows, sweetheart, maybe you’ll get a sign proving you wrong. You’re just being stubborn.”
“I’m just being realistic, Mom.” Ethan bent down and kissed her cheek. “Now I’m off to work on my manuscript.” He chuckled. “Who would have ever thought my going crazy would boost book sales. I’m, like, in high demand.” He winked at his mother.
“Would you please stop with that crazy nonsense?” She pointed a finger at him. “You lost your way is all.”
“Nah, Josh agrees with me.”
“Oh good lord!” She rolled her eyes but started to laugh. “I can guarantee Jensen doesn’t feel that way at all, and what Jensen says goes where Josh is concerned.”
“So very true.” He waved to his mother and headed toward his room.
Ethan sat down at his desk and pulled up his e-mail. He responded to his agent in regards to his current work in progress. These days it took him longer to find the words to write down. Writing used to be his passion and outlet for his crazy thoughts but now it was just tiring. He still loved it but it was just different now.
After going through his inbox, Ethan got back to his writing. Time seem to lose all meaning when he worked and it wasn’t until he heard his phone go off did he realize it was closing in on two in the afternoon.
He grabbed his phone and saw he’d gotten a text from Josh. A smile grew across his face as he read it.
Hey, asshole, where have you been????
Busy, Ethan typed back.
Bullshit.
Hey, that’s the life of an author.
Yeah, whatever. Jensen’s been busting balls about you coming for a visit. So my balls would greatly appreciate it if you got your pasty pale ass out to Silver Creek like yesterday.
Ethan stared at his phone, unsure how to respond. He’d promised the last time Josh and Jensen came to visit him that he’d come out there, but the timing just didn’t feel right. He’d grown to love these two men and considered them his best friends.
Hello???
I promise I’ll get out there soon. I’m just extremely busy right now. Ethan sent off the text, hoping Josh would leave it at that and drop it.
Do you think I’m a fucking moron? I do know what day it is and I think some time away would do wonders for your old ass.
Ethan let out a laugh. I appreciate the concern, man, but really I’m fine.
Josh didn’t respond right away and Ethan sat staring at the phone screen. He didn’t want to offend Josh or even Jensen but he didn’t feel like he’d be great company in his current state.
I get it Ethan but if you change your mind don’t hesitate to call. We are always here for you, you crazy bastard.
Thanks!
Ethan put the phone away and turned back to his laptop. His fingers hovered over the keyboard but he didn’t type a single word. A smile spread over his face as he remembered Josh and Jensen. His two Js.
Josh and Jensen had been the ones who were there when Ethan cracked under the pressure of losing Jay. He’d kidnapped poor Jensen and stuck him in a cage in order to get his boyfriend, Josh, to turn him into a werewolf. It was crazy, but Ethan wasn’t in his right frame of mind. Lucky for him, Josh and Jensen were two very forgiving and understanding men. It probably didn’t hurt that Josh was actually a wolf and in the beginning feared Ethan would tell his secret. But soon the friendship grew strong and Ethan didn’t know what he’d do without them. They called or texted at least a few times a week and Jensen was big on sending joke e-mails. It was good to have friends who knew all his faults and loved him in spite of them.
Ethan worked for a few more hours until his mother knocked on his door, letting him know dinner was ready. He headed down the stairs and was glad to see his parents’ suitcases sitting by the front door. They needed some time without Ethan around and he needed some time without all the hovering.
After dinner he told his mom he’d do the dishes and ushered her and his father out the door before they could change their minds. He was lucky to have parents that cared so much about him, but it could be very constricting at times.
Once they were gone, he cleared away the dishes and went back to his room to get some work done. Around one in the morning, Ethan stumbled out of his chair and flopped down on his mattress face first. He grabbed the edge of the comforter and pulled it over his body. He was too tired take off his clothes or climb under the covers. It didn’t take long before the blissfulness of sleep carried him off.
“Will you still love me when I’m old and gray?”
“Of course.” Ethan held Jay’s hand as he twirled him around while they danced on the patio outside their apartment, the gentle breeze causing Ethan’s hair to fall into his face. “But the real question is, will you love me?”
“I’ll love you until the end of time.” Jay giggled as Ethan spun him back around to face him.
Ethan snaked his arms around Jay’s waist, holding him close. “I can’t wait to marry you.”
“Then I guess it’s lucky for you that I said yes.” Jay’s piercing blue eyes locked onto Ethan’s.
“This was a wonderful memory, Ethan.”
Ethan jerked to the side, pulling Jay close at the sound of another voice. He looked over to see Jay leaning against the railing that ran along the patio. Ethan looked from that Jay to the one in his arms.
“This was the night you asked me to marry you.”
Ethan shook his head. “What’s going on?” He look down at the Jay in his arms who had his head resting on his chest, swaying from side to side in Ethan’s embrace.
“You’re dreaming, silly.”
The Jay in his arms vanished and Ethan spun in a circle looking for him. “Where did he go?” He was in a panic. This was all too weird. There were two Jays out here with him but that wasn’t possible.
“I’m right here.” Jay pushed off from the railing and walked over to Ethan. He held his arms up, indicating the twinkly lights Ethan had hung up and the bottle of champagne sitting on the small table off to the side. “This was the happiest night of my life.”
“Mine, too.” Ethan stared at Jay.
Jay stood there smiling. He wore his favorite gray sweater, a dark pair of blue jeans, and his black boots. The outfit brought back another memory. One of pain and sorrow. He wanted the other Jay back. The one with the sweetest smiles promising to love him forever.
“Ethan, baby, you have to get past this.” Jay reache
d out and trailed a finger down the side of Ethan’s face.
“But I don’t want to.” Ethan’s voice broke as he spoke. The wind blew Jay’s blond hair, sending the honey-colored strains into his eyes. “I miss you so fucking much.” Tears ran from his eyes as if someone had turned on a faucet. He couldn’t control it.
“I miss you, too, but this isn’t living, baby.” Jay wrapped Ethan’s hands in his own and brought them to his lips and kissed each hand. “I’m gone, Ethan, and no amount of praying or wishing will bring me back.”
“Don’t say that.” Ethan fell to his knees, hugging his arms around Jay’s waist.
“Baby, look at me.” Jay placed a finger under Ethan’s chin, forcing his face up to look at him. “You need to move on before you miss out on something wonderful. Just because you fall in love again doesn’t mean you’ll forget me. I’ll always be right here.” He put a hand over Ethan’s heart.
“But I don’t want to find someone else.” Ethan stood up, gripped the sides of Jay’s handsome face, and tilted the man’s head up to meet his eyes. “You’re the only man I will ever love.” His words came out garbled from emotion.
“Oh, baby, you’re a great man with a lot of love to give. Don’t live like this because of me. I don’t want this for you.” Jay reached up and brushed a soft featherlight kiss over Ethan’s lips. “You’re still living, Ethan. Don’t let life pass you by.” And with that, Jay vanished.
Ethan spun in a circle, gasping for breath, searching for Jay. He screamed out Jay’s name but he didn’t respond. Ethan collapsed to the ground and cried so hard all his muscles ached and he beat his fist on the ground.