Forget Me Not (The Heart's Spring)

by Amber Stokes

  The silver band shone like light playing on water as he waited for her response. She stared at the ring as if mesmerized, her mouth slightly open, begging for his kiss. Just one word.

  But no words came. She fiddled with her skirt, her eyes turning as glassy as the lake. He knew who had to be on her mind. His chest cinched a little tighter, and he shifted back to take some of the pressure off of his knee. If she just said yes, they could move forward.

  Forget about David. I’m here. He’s not.

  He couldn’t bring himself to say the words aloud. “Elizabeth…?”

  He had a home for her, a place to take care of her and provide for her and a family. That had to mean something.

  She closed her eyes, blew out a breath, and then—finally—met his gaze. “Yes.”

  Shock and sweet relief poured through him, and she laughed at whatever expression he made.

  “I said yes!” Her giggles skimmed across the water. “Aren’t you going to kiss me?”

  Her smile turned bright, hopeful, and he was sure it mirrored his own. He let out a whoop and sent his hat sailing through the air, out toward the water. Then he bent down and scooped her up into his arms, kissing her with all the exuberance and passion he had ever longed to feel.

  When he pulled back, she slipped a little, and he drew her back to his chest again. Her muffled words spoken into his shirt made him chuckle. “Ya best be careful, or we’ll both end up in the lake.”

  “Sorry.” He wasn’t sorry at all. Grasping her hand, he declared, “Let’s go tell my brother and Naomi the good news!”

  No more rocks for Joe Clifton. No more boulders lying in his path, obstructing the flow of his life. He was ready to forge ahead like a clear, wild river.

  Chapter 18

  “Golden! Now arriving in Golden!”

  David glanced out the train window, the apprehension that he had expected to feel conspicuously absent. It felt right somehow. He was home.

  Grabbing the saddlebags he had brought with him—his only luggage—and placing his hat on his head, he headed to the front of the car. The train came to a stop, screeching a little on the tracks and puffing out an exhausted breath of smoke. David understood. It had been a long journey for him, too.

  Memories poured over him as he walked down the steps and onto the wooden platform. He thought of his mother, the smell of baked bread surrounding her like a cloud and the snow-dusting of flour powdering her apron. He recalled following his father and Amos around, trying to help out on the farm as best as a young boy could. Then he thought of a young girl with a smile bright as the sun when he had given her those little blue flowers as they played by the river. An ache stole over him.

  There was no need to ask for directions as he walked through town. It was as if he had been through here only a few months ago, buying sugar or flour for his family and rushing home in order to help his ma get food on the table. Ignoring the jeers of early drunken fights and the female shoppers calling out to one another, he skirted horse droppings in the road and headed out of town, to the farmhouse he had once loved so well.

  Fields of quietness eventually replaced the town’s cacophony. The gentle music of nature, punctuated by jingling harnesses and enhanced with the smell of hay, greeted him, each step taking him further back in time. Any moment he expected to hear his sisters giggling, or his mother humming out in the garden, or Amos yelling and asking him to go for a swim in the river running through their land.

  But no human voices called to him as he caught sight of his family’s land. The farmhouse appeared a bit worse for wear, but was still as welcoming as he remembered it to be. A few flowers bloomed in front of the porch, and the sun shone warmly upon the pink blossoms.

  He stopped a few yards away, not wanting to break the peacefulness of the scene or the cheerfulness of unmarred and happy memories—memories made before he had fallen into the creek and been lost to his family.

  A breeze enveloped him with a feeling of melancholy, bittersweet but tinged with hope. Taking a deep breath, he walked forward, stepped onto the porch, and knocked.

  Footsteps sounded, and then his mother opened the door, a smile hovering on her lips as she eyed him warily. He knew he should speak first, but he couldn’t utter a word. Years seemed to melt away as he saw the mother he had loved so dearly, but they quickly rushed back up to meet him. He felt the impact of each one as he saw the sorrow on her face, the added lines around her eyes, and nary a look of recognition or acceptance. He shouldn’t have come.

  “I’m sorry, ma’am—”

  He didn’t have a chance to finish. A strange look passed over his mother’s face, and a shiver coursed through her. Squinting, she stepped forward, then gasped. “Casey? Can it be…?”

  His old name sounded so strange, like a childhood nickname long forsaken. “Ma.” His vision blurred.

  As soon as he spoke the word, his mother’s hand flew to her mouth. “My little boy. Oh, my baby boy! My Casey.”

  He reached out and pulled her to him in an embrace, and she sobbed against his shoulder. He had never known what it was like to be taller than his mother, to pass from the stage of her little boy to her grown son, a son that could take care of his family. Would he ever know how much he had missed?

  “Ma?” A young woman appeared at the door, concern tightening her features. Her brown hair was braided down her back, just like it had been all those years ago – except then her braid had been shorter and just right for yanking. He could still hear her cries of outrage as she chased him from the house.

  “Louisa.”

  The girl startled when he spoke her name.

  Another young woman appeared in the doorway. She had to be Christy. Even as toddlers, their differences had been obvious. One brunette, the other blonde. One more serious in nature, the other flamboyant.

  Christy peeked over her sister’s shoulder at David. “Who is it?” Her light hair was pulled up into a fashionable style, and her blue eyes shone with curiosity.

  His mother didn’t look up as she clung to him, so he replied, “I’m your brother, Casey.”

  His sisters both gasped and stared as if he had told them he was President Cleveland, come for a visit. He offered them a gentle smile and held out his hand to Louisa, unsure if she would accept the handshake.

  Both Louisa and Christy let out a cry and crowded into his embrace. He hugged them all tightly, afraid to let go, afraid to discover that the moment was just a dream. Any lingering anger built up over the years crumbled at the force of their welcome, their emotions high as if he was a war hero or perhaps the prodigal son. Whenever he had let the thought of returning tumble around in his mind, he always pictured the door tightly closed, no one willing to allow the past into a home too small for him.

  “I just can’t believe you’re alive,” his mother breathed, shaken. She pulled back and held his face in her cold hands. “You have to know that.” Her gaze pleaded with him, her tears now silent as they tracked down her cheeks.

  David couldn’t respond. Instead, he asked, “Where’s Pa?”

  And then it hit him, why his mother had appeared so sad before she even knew who he was. Their silence cut him deeply. He had waited too long to come home, and now he would never have the chance to know if his father would have opened the door wide for him, as his mother had.

  “He…fell from the hayloft…” Louisa attempted to answer, but the tale was obviously too gruesome and raw to share yet, sending a shudder through his sister.

  He let them all go and stepped out of his mother’s hold, furiously rubbing at his eyes. He would not let them see their older brother as weak. This was his chance to be the help his family needed, although it was coming years too late.

  His mother straightened, heading for the door and rubbing her teary face with her apron. “Come in, Casey. I’ve got supper cooking. Amos will be in from the fields soon, and we’ve got so much to talk about.”

  Like how you stopped looking for me? How you gave up on me?
Even though the hot anger was gone, the smoldering hurt remained. Still, he followed the girls inside. As he stepped over the threshold, a kinder warmth spread through his heart. His pride had been beaten low through the years, but now there was no room for pride.

  He was home.

  Chapter 19

  Could this place ever feel like home? Elizabeth clung to Joe as they walked through town on their way to Jacob’s house, avoiding the drunken brawls echoing from the saloons. Why, it was still the middle of the day, and men were already drunk! She tightened her grip on Joe’s arm.

  Joe laughed and hugged her arm close to his side. “It’s fine, honey. They’ll stay in the saloons. Just don’t visit those places, and you’ll stay out of danger.”

  She bristled at his words. Did he know about the time she went into the Delta looking for David?

  His finger brushed her cheek. “I didn’t mean to imply ya would. I was just tryin’ to reassure you.”

  She tried to relax. The shouts and pounding that marched down the streets hadn’t bothered her as much before, when she thought she was just visiting Virginia City.

  Well, that wasn’t completely true. She had never been sure what she was going to do after she saw her brother. All she had known was that David was there, and she didn’t want to go anywhere without him…

  Tears burned, and her nose wrinkled. How could she be thinking about David when she was engaged to Joe? She simply had to put him out of her mind. He had obviously forgotten all about her. Life would go on, and she would make this land her home if it meant staying with someone who loved her.

  “What’s the matter?”

  From the corner of her eye, she saw Joe looking down at her with concern.

  “I…I’m just… I don’t know what I’ll say to Annabelle.” And that truly did bother her.

  “I know it’ll be different, but please don’t judge her. She didn’t have much of a choice. And Jacob really does love her.”

  The mention of her brother’s name sent shivers spiraling through her. She hoped that Jacob wouldn’t be there at the house. She couldn’t face him yet. As far as she could tell from his earlier habits, though, she had no reason to worry that he would actually be with Annabelle.

  Her thoughts were all tangled up when it came to her sister-in-law. She was so sweet, but what could have caused her to choose such an…occupation? Of course, Elizabeth had never known what it was to really be in need. Sarah Anne had seen to her care ever since her parents died. What if Sarah Anne hadn’t taken her in? What if she had been on her own?

  Her emotions tied her insides into knots as she climbed her brother’s porch steps with Joe at her side. He knocked on the door, and they waited.

  A minute later, Annabelle opened the door a crack and peeked out, uncertainty darkening her expression. Without another thought, Elizabeth pushed the door open all the way and embraced her sister-in-law. “Oh, Annabelle, I’ve missed you!”

  ***

  Joe caught the surprise on Annabelle’s face a moment before the tears came. She hugged Elizabeth tightly, and together they both cried.

  He had no idea what had caused Elizabeth to become so emotional. He supposed the thought of weddings did that to a woman. And he knew she had been worried about seeing Annabelle again, after what she had learned.

  He was proud of her, and her kindness to Annabelle only made him love her more. Annabelle needed a friend like Elizabeth. He would be sure to bring Elizabeth into town often after they were married.

  Finally, Annabelle and Elizabeth pulled apart, and Annabelle ushered him and Elizabeth inside. The two females sat close together on the sofa in the parlor.

  “It is so good to see you again,” Annabelle said, a warm smile on her face.

  “It’s good to see you, too.” Elizabeth wiped away stray tears and responded with a smile of her own.

  Joe let Elizabeth tell her sister-in-law the news of their engagement, knowing that women loved to be the first to share anything with one another. He stood in the doorway of the parlor, watching them with a smile and smoothing his mustache with finger and thumb as he listened to them. He’d have to get another haircut and shave before the wedding…

  “When will the wedding be?” Annabelle asked.

  “Well, I want to invite my ma, so I’ll need some time to get a telegram to her and make sure she can come.” Elizabeth turned to Joe, a question in her still wet, green eyes.

  “Perhaps we can wait until spring,” Joe offered, although he disliked the idea of waiting several months or more until the wedding. It hadn’t even started to snow yet, but it would soon. A winter chill had already invaded the air.

  Elizabeth gestured for him to come join her, so he sat down beside her on the end of the sofa, taking her hand in his. “I think it would be good to wait,” she reiterated. “That way we have more time to…well, to get to know each other. And Sarah Anne will have enough time to schedule the trip. I really want her to be here.”

  “I know. We’ll make sure she arrives before we get hitched.” He winked at her, hoping to put her at ease.

  Elizabeth continued to chatter with Annabelle about the wedding, and as she did Joe let his mind wander. He had a feeling Elizabeth wouldn’t be comfortable with staying at her brother’s house anymore, and having her stay at the boardinghouse with that man, Myghal, was out of the question. But would she be willing to come down to the ranch with him? Seth and Naomi would be there to serve as chaperones and provide some company, but the snow would probably keep them from town for most of the season…

  “Where is your mind today, Joe?” Elizabeth poked him in the side, a wobbly smile on her face.

  “Did I miss somethin’?”

  “Annabelle wants to know if we could join her for supper.”

  “Of course.”

  Spring seemed so far away, but he would push that thought aside in favor of enjoying the smile on Elizabeth’s face.

  Chapter 20

  “Hello, Pa.”

  David stared down at his father’s grave, wondering what his pa would say if he were still alive. Would he have warmly accepted his younger son back from the grave like David’s mother and siblings had done? Or would he have sent David away again, if for no other reason than that they could no longer relate to one another after all those years apart?

  The small wooden cross was a bit weather-beaten after two years of surviving the elements, sheltered only by a couple of aspen trees by the river. David leaned back against one of the trees and crossed his arms over his chest, hearing only the rustle of the breeze through the leaves and the gentle splashing of the river as it meandered across the field. No little blue flowers at this time of year—and no green-eyed girl to give them to.

  Heaving a sigh, he slid down the tree to a sitting position on the dead grass. He kept his arms crossed, afraid to completely relax.

  “Why didn’t you try harder to find me? I waited for you to come for me.”

  Just like Elizabeth, David had gone to Clear Creek Canyon in a fit of boyish frustration. He was a headstrong eight-year-old, running from his anger toward Amos for something he had done, something David couldn’t even remember now. And just like Elizabeth, he had managed to fall into the swift creek. The only difference was that he had hit his head when the current had thrust him against some rocks at the shore. He had awoken drenched, cold clear through, and lost, unable to remember why he was there or where he was supposed to go. After hours of wandering through the ponderosas, he had come across Frank’s cabin.

  The man with the scruffy beard and gentle soul had taken him in and given him a childhood as a mountain boy. Perhaps he should have been more angry with Frank, who had never tried to find his family for him. But somehow David had been able to forgive the lonely man when he had learned the truth, even though he was unwilling to forgive his own family. Frank was all David had, the only other person he knew for several years, and their bond was not easily rent, especially considering Frank had wanted him for a son wh
en his own family apparently did not.

  By the time he remembered where his home was, his life in the quiet, accepting mountains was all he wanted. By the time his honorary father died in a hunting accident, the feeling of abandonment was complete.

  But all that time, he had only been a couple of days away from the farm and his former life.

  “Why, Pa? I was so close. How could you just give up on me?” No one but God was there to see his angry tears. He had never wanted to grieve—he’d wanted to be brave in his exile, to stand on his own two feet without sorrowing after a family that didn’t care. They might not have cared, but I did. He couldn’t hide the pain any longer.

  “Casey?”

  His gaze flew up to find his brother walking toward him. He angled his face away, but not before he saw the concern in Amos’s eyes. After a moment, Amos joined him on the grass, leaning back on the other side of the tree and brushing the long blond hair out of his face.

  “You know we did our best to find you.” A question fluttered in the statement, but the words came out with enough certainty to suggest that David could never have thought anything else.

  He had no answer for that. He would have liked to believe it, but doubt was a more familiar friend.

  Feeling Amos’s gaze on him, he finally said, “I suppose so.”

  “Pa searched for days. We went to town, asked all of our neighbors—we even went to the canyon. We had no way of knowing whether the marks we found were from a wild creature or you. Of course, you were one and the same at times…”

  A grin rose of its own will on David’s face, but quickly disappeared.

  “Did ya…ever miss me?” He ducked his head in embarrassment and plucked at the grass, knowing it was a childish question, feeling like the tag-along little brother he had once been.

  Amos bumped his shoulder, waiting until David glanced up and met his somber gaze. “You’re my brother. You’re a part of our family—always were and always will be, gone or not.” He paused. “Did you know that we always kept your chair at the table? Ma never had the heart to take it away.”