The Program
Page 16
NINETEEN
When she finished this time, TD stroked her hair. “There, now, that was really great progress.”
She slid off the bed onto the blanket and sheets laid out on the floor; the Teacher needed room in bed to sleep undisturbed. TD rolled to his side, and within seconds his breathing slowed. Leah lay awake as she had the night before, one hand clutching the butter-smooth sheets. Not wanting to disturb TD, she didn’t move, even though her right arm was falling asleep. Split by the slatted blinds, the moon crept molasses slow up the blanket covering her.
She certainly had it better than Nancy, who had not reappeared from Skate’s shed. All day Skate had patrolled the perimeter and shadowed TD with a satiated grin, disappearing at intervals. On the ranch, sex was a rationed privilege.
Leah was surprised to catch herself questioning the benefits of this aspect of TD’s tutelage. She thought about her perverse need to be negative during a wonderful opportunity like this. Staying On Program, listening to the Teacher—that was how people grew.
A dying candle persisted on the nightstand beside her, next to a telephone with its cord removed—TD called for the phone cord rarely and only for essential Program business. Tacked to the wall above the night-stand was TD’s phone sheet, the schedule of hours at which he had set incoming calls. Callers, knowing they had a window of maybe five minutes to reach him, developed a discipline.
Her thoughts seemed a Christmas-light tangle, impossibly snared, granting flashes of lucidity at random yet somehow connected intervals. Nestled in the warm swirl of sheets, she reminded herself that she was privileged to be able to learn about her insecurities with the Teacher. She ran through Program precepts until they became thoughtless blurs. After an excruciating block of time, she heard the outside door creak open. The faint tap of a footstep. And then another.
Leah lay frozen.
A startled scream—Lorraine. TD bolted upright and rushed to the door, tugging his pants on, Leah trailing meekly for fear of being left behind in darkness.
TD hit the switch as Nancy shrugged off Lorraine’s two-arm tackle. The misaligned buttons of Nancy’s dress created mouths in the denim through which skin and bra peeked. The hem was ripped, the fabric marred by muddy groping. Her bed-swirled hair stuck out in all directions. Nancy began sobbing, her words barely comprehensible. “Teacher, please, lemme back with you. Lemme be your Lily. Pleeease.”
TD calmly cinched his silk robe about his waist. “After you were with that filthy man?”
Skate was in the door, scratching his scalp, his fingernails giving off some good noise. “Guess she got away.”
“Take her off the ranch. This one’s not salvageable.”
Nancy emitted a high-pitched moan, collapsed, and began crawling to TD. Skate pinned her beneath a knee and twisted her arm behind her back. Then Randall appeared, controlling Nancy’s other side. They picked her up as if hauling a carpet and bore her out horizontally. Her hair whipped about her head, her screams so shrill Leah squinted against them. Her cries continued all the way up the trail. Somewhere around Cottage Circle, the wind finally carried them off.
TD went back inside and slid into bed. Leah followed and sat on her sheets, trying to sort her thoughts. Finally TD rolled over and said, “Yes?”
“Where... where will they take her?”
“Down the hill. Into the city. They’ll leave her somewhere safe. But she’s no longer my concern. Nor should she be yours.”
“She’ll”—Leah wiped her cheeks, glad the darkness prevented TD from seeing how shaken she was—”she’ll die without you.”
“She’s dying already,” TD said with finality. After another pause he sighed and shoved himself up against the headboard. “What, Leah? If you have something to ask, ask it. Don’t just sit there radiating stress and fear.”
“What do you mean, she’s dying already?”
“She’s decaying. Women peak reproductively at an early age, just after puberty. In primitive cultures and in the early days of this country, females got married when they were thirteen, fourteen years old. They’d bear several children and pass by twenty-five, maybe thirty. Women are designed to peak, breed, and perish. Nancy is twenty-four years old. Her eggs are old and stale. She looks forward to a future only because the artificial intervention of modern medicine has prolonged human life well beyond its natural range. But even medicine can’t stop her body—that obese, jiggling mass around her—from slowly breaking down, from dying in minuscule increments as it has been for the last eight years. Her very appearance is indicative of a diseased way of thinking. Nancy won’t figure her way out of her death dilemma. She’d rather be a victim. One of the dying. With her mind-set, she has nothing to look forward to but aloneness and the further putrefaction of her body.”
He sighed and ran his hands over his face. “I know it might appear cruel, but I have a responsibility here. I can’t let someone like her infect the rest of you who are working so hard to grow past your physical and psychological limitations.”
His indirect compliment warmed her, if only slightly.
“Before you go weepy for Nancy,” he said, “why don’t you reflect on the fact that this wake-up call is the best thing that could ever happen to her?”
Leah asked tentatively, “Do you think it was the best thing for Lisa Kander?”
She was worried TD might get angry, but he just laughed. “Now that you mention it, yes. She found life without The Program too much to bear. So she took her comfort in the soothing hiss of the tar pits. Beats living a lie. Beats being one of the walking dead. At least she took back some control in her death.” He reached over and stroked Leah’s head. “Good night. I need my sleep, and so do you.” He smiled. “Big day tomorrow.”
TWENTY
Wedged between a smoggy run of Sepulveda and perpetual traffic mainlining up Century Boulevard into LAX, the Radisson held its ground with a certain imperviousness and vanity, as if the recent renovation had fooled the establishment into thinking highly of itself. Tim pulled up and dropped a duplicate key in the palm of a youthful valet who all but Matrixed over getting an eyeful of the banana yellow ride.
“Keep it up front.”
The valet nodded. “A-ight.”
Standing erect amid streams of incoming attendees, Lorraine greeted Tim at the automatic glass doors, wearing a stewardess’s polyester smile. “Nice wheels.”
She took his arm, guiding him through the brochure-glossy lobby, leaving the others to progress unattended. Bill O’Reilly flapped about immigrants from a suspended TV in the bar area. A fountain nestled in the curving staircase’s embrace burbled, the sound drifting with them up and around to a spacious second-floor landing. North-facing windows provided a view of a loading dock, a back parking lot, and an emergency exit.
A confusion of people sorted neatly into the International Ballroom through a set of double doors, the so-called Pros distinguishable by pressed blue polos and matching purposefulness. With a faint grin, Lorraine suddenly receded into the press of bodies, no doubt off to escort some other affluent convert.
Not only had event attendance grown exponentially since Reggie’s day, but the target demographics had fanned out. The Neos, ranging from late teens to thirties, appeared to represent a variety of backgrounds. They hummed with nervous anticipation, picking up on the exuberance of the cult members. A few stragglers gathered near the back of the landing, staring longingly at a roped-off bank of pay phones guarded by an OFF-LIMITS! sign on a stout brass post. No one dared cross the velvet cord.
Tim scanned the crowd, looking for Leah’s distinctive shaggy brown hair. The blue polos and flushed, youthful faces made the cult members easy to pick out as they darted to and fro completing their preparations, but there were too many for him to keep track. He barely had time to eyeball the ushers guarding the ballroom doors before a toothy young jock at a draped check-in table requested his name. Yes, Tom, there was a $500 fee. Wasn’t his fulfillment worth spending a few bucks? No, t
hey couldn’t accept a personal check, but AmEx or Visa would be fine.
Another hand-off and he was whisked through the doors by a robust young woman in a shapeless dress. Two segmented partitions divided the fourteen-thousand square feet of ballroom. Another brass-post sign identified the empty first section as ACTSPACE. Led by hand, Tim passed through a gap in the partition into a second area with about three hundred chairs positioned in a giant horseshoe, the open end facing a dais. The sign there, predictably, read HEARSPACE. The woman deposited him in the rear at a banquet table and vanished. Enya oozed, bass-heavy and forlorn, from hidden speakers.
Tim accepted a glass of punch from a female Pro and surreptitiously gifted its contents to a fake ficus leaning from a peat pot. So he wouldn’t stand out, he held on to the clear plastic cup, carrying traces of the punch. He avoided the snacks but crumpled a napkin in his hand. As he drifted effortlessly through the clots of people, he grudgingly recognized that he owed his father much of his ability to work undercover. The others chatted nervously, strained alertness tightening their faces. The 5:00 A.M. commencement meant a four o’clock wake-up for most participants, giving them a head start on exhaustion.
“I can’t really afford this whole deal,” a burly guy in a jean jacket was telling a few uninterested girls and a tattooed Marine, “but the owner said he’d only hire me if I went through this thing.” He tapped a passing Pro, who turned glassy pupils and a disarming grin in his direction. “Hey, what are we gonna be doing anyway?”
“You don’t want me to tell you anything about today’s work before we get to it. It would undermine your experience.”
Tim stood at the fringe of the group, his eyes picking over the enormous room. Numerous light panels and thermostats, carpeted metal partitions and cloth-dressed walls, hideously patterned rug, equally offensive chandeliers like dimpled breasts. A service elevator briefly came into view when a stressed-out blue-shirt swept through a rear waitstaff door—Tim’s favored extraction route.
Tim craned his neck to see through the fifteen-foot gap in the second partition, but the far ballroom section, labeled PROSPACE, was dark. He edged nearer, wanting a peek at Oz’s command center. Cult members continued to stream out like diligent ants; he guessed there were sixty in all.
Easing away from the crowd, he neared the dark portal to Prospace, his advance going unnoticed. He shouldered against the makeshift jamb near a pinned velvet curtain, ready to slip through. Scurrying figures were barely discernible beyond, shadows against shadows.
A small orb in the darkness was suddenly illuminated—the glowing red dials of a sound board firing up—and there stood Leah, knock-kneed and soft-faced and taller than he’d imagined, bent over the apparatus like a pianist. Her slim fingers punched buttons and adjusted dials. Her competence and apparent collectedness made clear that the abduction was not going to be as simple as he’d imagined—carting off a zoned-out cult zombie. She looked up, burgundy suffusing her hair at the tips, and their eyes met and held. She smiled, showing off an angled front tooth, and he had just an instant to take in the absolute sweetness of her expression before a block of shadow took form and collided with him, a forehead striking the side of his face.
He fell back into the light. A squat guy was standing over him, shoulders drawn back so his arms bowed wide. A sweatshirt with ripped-off sleeves was pulled tight across his broad chest. A necklace—copper wires threaded through earth-tone beads—was embedded in the V of chest hair visible beneath the shoelace stitching the ripped collar. He matched the description of the thug who’d assisted Leah with her move, bead necklace and all.
“Didn’t see you,” Tim said.
“Not allowed back here,” the guy answered.
The thrill of finding Leah took the edge off the throbbing in Tim’s cheek. A sharp pain pinched his hip where something hard and metal had struck him. A concealed weapon?
Tim pulled himself to his feet; no hand was offered. “Oh, I’m sorry. I didn’t realize it was limited access. I’m Tom Altman.”
The man stood motionless and unblinking. “You wanna be back over with the others.”
The glow from the sound board had vanished, taking Leah with it.
“I didn’t get your name.” Tim smiled self-consciously. “I don’t know anyone here.”
“Skate Daniels. We’re, uh, preparing back here.”
A smooth voice reverberated through the speakers. “Let’s all get seats now.”
With a nod Tim retreated from the unbudging figure, finding a chair. Others trickled in, filling the horseshoe as “Orinoco Flow” continued to soothe. Sweat trickled down Tim’s forehead; a raised hand to the overhead vents confirmed they were running full blast. He slid off his heavy winter coat and stuffed it under the chair. He’d made one arm of his long-sleeved undershirt detachable, Velcroed in place so it would give with a firm tug. The thick patch at the elbow doubled as a bit for the makeshift gag.
When the song ended, the low rumble of a drum replaced it, heartbeat steady. Tim felt tired already from the heat, and malleable, which was precisely the aim. Those around him seemed unnaturally relaxed, no doubt due to whatever concoction enhanced the punch.
Blond, fair-skinned, and slightly equine about the mouth, the couple who took the dais seemed peeled from a 1940s German propaganda poster. They gazed at each other with shared excitement, singers on the verge of a duet chorus.
“Hello, I’m Stanley John—”
“And I’m Janie.”
Stanley John winked at the crowd, adjusting his head mike. “The Program was evolved by our teacher, Terrance Donald Betters, through years of research and study. You’re going to get the opportunity to hear from TD soon. But first we’ve got to lay down some basic practices for what will be the most transforming experience of your life. Number One: Don’t destabilize our techniques. The Program is precise. Success for all is reliant on no one’s interrupting the process. It’s not fair to everyone else if you cut in and derail their forward movement. Make sense?”
Janie was nodding for him. “Number Two: No leaving before the colloquium is finished. No matter what. The instruction and group work go all day and night. At five A.M. when you graduate, you’ll be different people. But before then you must not leave. Not if your mother has a heart attack and they’re reading her the last rites. Anyone who can’t handle this level of commitment should go now. This is your chance.” A dramatic pause during which no one moved. “Good—but this is an active commitment. So everyone who’s strong enough to see this experience through, stand up.”
About 90 percent of the attendees, including Tim, rose. Slowly, the others joined them, pulled by discomfort or obligation, until only three remained sitting.
One of them, a weary thirty-something, raised her hand. “I’m an only parent, and my kids are with a sitter. What if there’s an emergency and I have to leave?”
“If you’re an excuse maker, then you’ll never learn to take control of your life. Just leave now. No reason to stay and interfere with everyone else’s growth.”
“But what if...?”
“Whoa, horsey.” Stanley John chuckled kindly, Janie matching his Teutonic smile. Some scattered, nervous laughter from the crowd. “Ma’am, we explained the rules. We’re not gonna take up everyone else’s time holding your hand.”
“Yeah, let’s get on with it!” a plant shouted from the audience.
“If you want to be a victim of an emergency that hasn’t happened yet, if you want to walk out on growth, the door’s that way.” Stanley John smiled benevolently at the woman, who wilted back in her chair, then pulled herself to her feet. He smiled even bigger, clapping, and the crowd slowly joined in. “Good for you.”
During the applause one of the other dissenters stood, too, his face flushed. The last, an anxious-looking man in a bargain suit, scurried from the ballroom, shaking his head and muttering to himself.
Janie and Stanley John ran through the other rules in similar fashion. No questions durin
g activities. No smoking or drinking. Eat only the food that’s been provided.
“Why can’t we take bathroom breaks without approval?” a frazzled woman wanted to know.
“Because TD found out it’s too disruptive otherwise.”
Tim began to rethink his plan for extracting Leah. Clearly he wouldn’t have much mobility. He couldn’t very well page her to a house phone or catch her on her way to the bathroom.
The recitation of the rules continued. Change seats now if you’re sitting with anyone you know. Music will play between activities—get back to your chairs by the time it stops. You’ve got to participate fully.
The stifling heat, bursts of applause, and constant sitting and standing—enough to rival midnight mass—were working their magic, making the crowd at once obedient and lethargic. People with hesitations were mocked for being uncommitted, more people from the audience joining in each time.
Tim caught sight of Shanna at the far end of the horseshoe. Grinning dumbly, lips stained red with punch, she slouched in her chair, her head angled on a lenient neck. About five more people chose to leave before the lengthy introduction concluded, departing through a hail of hisses, boos, and—worse—sympathetic ohhs. The woman next to Tim, who wore a shell of egg-blond hair and no rings on her chubby fingers, appeared to be in a daze, humming to herself and nodding vehemently, her damp smock giving off an odor like curdled milk.
“All right!” Stanley John roared when the last rule had been summarily accepted. “Look around you. Everyone in this room has made the right choice. You’ve all chosen change and growth. From here forward, we’re all in this together.”
The room broke out in applause. Skate Daniels and the other likely knock-down man, a guy with a bald pate and a pronounced underbite, slid in front of the waitstaff doors and the Actspace partition gap—the only two exits. They stood like prison guards, arms crossed, expressionless. The herd was now corralled and Tim’s extraction route blocked.