Thorns of the Past

by Gun Brooke

  “Hello, Dar.” Benny chuckled. “How come you’re calling me on a Sunday, girl? It’s not even eleven yet.”

  “I need to borrow Khan, perhaps for a few days. Think he might like to stay with his favorite neighbor for a bit?” Darcy gripped the wheel harder.

  “Khan? You’re kidding, right? Last time you had him over there, I expected him to come back only to pack up his bed and toys and move in with you. He’s a fickle dog, that’s for goddamn sure.”

  “You’re so full of it,” Darcy said and laughed.

  “Khan is yours for as long as you need him. You’re not in any trouble, are you, girl?” Benny sounded worried now. “I can always camp out on your sofa or you can camp on mine, if that’s the case.”

  “No, no. Nothing like that. Just need to have his expert eyes, ears, and nose, to assist a…friend.” Darcy almost said client, but the less people in her small circle of family and friends knew, the better. “Thanks, Benny. Can you send him over in about forty-five minutes? He knows the way. We should be home about then.”

  “Sure thing. But who’s ‘we’?”

  “Got to go, Benny. Catch you later. Ciao! Close call.” Darcy gave a sigh of relief. Not that she doubted she could protect Sabrina. She was an excellent shot, and her training in hand-to-hand combat, not to mention her long sessions in her own gym, had made her physically strong. Still, it still irked her that the intruder in Mattley had managed to get past her. Having Khan with them would give them an edge.

  “So, we’re staying at your house with a dog. A different approach, I’ll give you that.” Sabrina tipped her head back. “I hate being chased out of my own home. I wish the person behind this would just face me directly. Sending some professionals to carry out their agenda…it’s cowardly, and it’s fucking infuriating!” Slamming her hand on the armrest, Sabrina then turned away from Darcy again. “One good thing about this is that I will know the truth. Too many schemes and lies already. I don’t need that from you.”

  Darcy ought to have been dissuaded by the harsh, furious way Sabrina spoke to her, but her mind had stopped at the last sentence. What did Sabrina mean by not needing this from Darcy in particular? Sabrina had every right to be this angry and frustrated, but there was still something about the “I don’t need that from you” that made Darcy grip the wheel harder. Why was she constructing some nonexistent meaning in Sabrina’s choice of words instead of taking them at face value? The only reason that came to mind was so preposterous, her rib cage clenched painfully around her lungs and heart, constricting the blood flow.

  “You have my word. No schemes or lies. I promise.” Hating how tears threatened to infuse her voice, Darcy forced herself to breathe evenly in and out and focus on the road. She stayed quiet and drove them to the place she’d moved in to three years ago. It was her refuge, and now she was bringing a woman to it that she cared far too much about—a woman who loathed Darcy and everything she’d once been.

  Chapter Twelve

  Darcy’s house was located at a cul-de-sac on a quiet street, where the houses seemed to stem from the colonial days. Painted white, light-blue, or gray, they sat beneath huge maples, oaks, and hickories. As Darcy pulled up the concrete driveway of the white house, Sabrina cautiously eyed the large German shepherd that sat at Darcy’s maroon front door, gazing at them serenely. He was a handsome dog with black-and-tan fur. His ears showed they had his full attention, but his body language also displayed that he was quite relaxed and welcoming.

  “Khan! You came on your own, huh? You’re such a clever dog!” Darcy laughed as the dog trotted over to her and threw himself on his back on the driveway. “Oh, and you’re nothing but a big oaf, aren’t you? And such a lovebug.” She rose and made a hand gesture, palm up. Khan sat up smartly, all attention now. “Come here,” she said to Sabrina and waved her over. “Stand next to me. No, like this.” She held Sabrina by the waist and tugged her close. “Khan. This is Sabrina. She is our friend. Okay? Sabrina is a friend.” After emphasizing the word a few more times, she patted Khan’s head. “Now let him sniff your hand. That should do it.”

  “He knows the word friend? Seriously?” Sabrina held out her hand, carefully, and Khan sniffed it dutifully. He gave her fingertips a quick lick, which she surmised was his stamp of approval. Once the big dog lost interest in her, Sabrina became all too aware of Darcy’s steady grip of her midsection and how closely they really stood together.

  Darcy seemed to come to the same realization because she let go of her as if she’d burned her hand and walked along the garden path to unlock the front door. Sabrina looked at the state-of-the-art alarm system console just inside the door and realized Darcy’s house was something of a fortress too. Curious, and, she admitted, concerned, she stepped inside and took off her coat.

  “I’ll get our bags. Hang tight.” Darcy quickly went back to fetch the luggage and returned with it, letting go of her own inside the door. “Let me show you to the guest room.” She moved toward the stairs and led the way to a small but cozy room just to the left.

  “Thank you. It’s very nice.” Sabrina meant it. Yes, she was used to her spacious rooms at the condo, but this was more like her beach house, and she did like the color scheme of the room—typical New England—with its ocean-blue, sand-colored bedding, and dark hardwood floor. Sabrina had decorated her beach house the same way, and the fact that they shared interior-design tastes was, if not remarkable as they both were New England women, still a bit special.

  “It doesn’t have an en suite bathroom, unfortunately, but it’s just outside the door between your room and mine.” Darcy opened the door and showed an impressive bathroom that boasted a shower stall as well as a large clawfoot tub. Looking at it, Sabrina knew what she wanted to do next. Before listening to any explanations, before going through the document Darcy’s cousin had sent—she wanted to have a bath.

  “You look positively hypnotized.” Darcy smiled.

  “I think I’ll bathe and try to relax. Today has been a bit…much.” Sabrina wasn’t comfortable with showing her weaknesses, but if anyone would understand, perhaps it was this woman, who seemed adamant when it came to her safety. Now, Darcy merely smiled and showed her where to find the towels.

  Sabrina let the water run while she fetched her toiletry bag. After getting undressed and undoing her hair, she lowered her aching body into the almost too-hot water. She had been so tense the entire day, ready to defend herself, but knowing from experience that it would only make things so much worse, she had kept her shoulders back and chin up. Preserving appearances was sometimes all that was left, all she could do. Now the water loosened her tight muscles and tendons, and slowly Sabrina’s tears began to run down her cheeks and blend with the bathwater.

  Who could be behind these attacks and break-ins? What had she done to deserve this? The fact that Dan’s family had been in jeopardy made her stomach roll, and she lowered herself into the water until only her face was above the surface. This was one of her best methods to block out her surroundings. No sound penetrated the water filling her ears. No sensations other than the hot water touched her skin. This was her escape if only for a short moment.

  After soaking and adding more hot water to the tub, Sabrina finally realized she had to get out before she turned into a complete prune. She rose and pulled the plug to let the water out. As it gurgled through the pipes, Sabrina wrapped a towel around her hair. After unfolding a large bath towel she wrapped it around her body, grateful for the nice, fluffy quality. Somehow, and she had to admit, because of her subconscious prejudices, she had expected less luxurious ones. Chastising herself for thinking like that about someone she knew literally nothing about, she secured the towel and padded out into the hallway, where she ran into the woman who was on her mind. Darcy was in the process of carrying up her overnight bag, and Sabrina had to take a firm grip of the doorknob.

  “Oh, God. You startled me.” Darcy said and laughed. “Hey, don’t slip. Looks like you’re still wet.”

>   Sabrina knew the exact moment when Darcy caught her own double entendre. Her eyes grew big, and she stared at Sabrina like she was at the end of a broken branch. Blushing a pretty pink, Darcy cleared her throat and then shook her head. “Me and my big mouth.”

  “I’ll be careful,” Sabrina said and walked into her room, closing the door behind her. She pulled out her last outfit, not counting the formal dress she’d packed, consisting of an off-white knitted sweater and black sweatpants. She didn’t plan to stay at Darcy’s long, but she would still need to do laundry.

  Downstairs, Khan had settled into a dog bed just inside the door to the living room. He looked up at her as she passed before resuming his relaxed pose. Perhaps he actually knew she was a friend.

  The living room was homey in the way only inherited, slightly mismatched furniture can provide. A large plaid couch, covered with several fleece blankets and joined by a multitude of pillows, served as the centerpiece of the room. Between it and the fireplace sat a rustic coffee table. A cast-iron tray held eight good-sized candles, and another, smaller tray was the home for four remote controls.

  The fireplace, another focal point, was already decorated for fall. A string of faux maple leaves ran along the mantel, where rough concrete candleholders supported even bigger candles than on the coffee table. Around the walls, bookshelf after bookshelf filled up most of the space, and Sabrina found she was very curious about what kind of books Darcy liked. If she listened to her old prejudices, she would have guessed crime novels, Stephen King, and perhaps the noir style. Strolling over to the closest one, she had to chuckle when she indeed saw evidence of the latter. Darcy did like dark crime novels, and she had a large selection of books by authors from several countries. An entire bookshelf was dedicated to romance novels, most of them about lesbian couples. Surprised, Sabrina pulled out a few, intrigued by how many Darcy had. Was she a true romantic despite her tough exterior? Sabrina realized she truly had to shake off her preconceived ideas and notions about people in general and the woman who had opened her home to her in particular.

  “Pick anything you like. I have tons of books, as you can tell. It’s my favorite pastime, reading.” Darcy came into the living room carrying yet another tray. “I made us some sandwiches and tea. Some cookies too, if you like. It’s a bit early to have dinner and too late to do a proper lunch, I think.”

  “Thank you. That’s perfect, actually.”

  “The bread is homemade. I popped over next door and scored some. Benny is a terrific baker.” Darcy placed the tray on the coffee table and poured some tea for them.

  Sabrina sat down and arranged a few pillows behind her back. Grabbing a cheese sandwich, she pulled her legs up under her and felt almost as safe and submerged among the blankets and pillows as she had in the tub.

  “You look a bit cold. I can start a fire, if you want?” Darcy was already on her feet.

  “Yes, that’d be lovely. But have your sandwich first. Please.”

  “I can multitask with the best of them.” Darcy winked and took a bite out of her ham sandwich. Chewing on it, she stacked a few logs and some pieces of kindling and soon had a roaring fire going. Khan came over, sniffing in the air, but didn’t go near their food. Instead, he walked over to Sabrina and put his head on her thighs, looking pleadingly at her.

  “What does he want?” Sabrina swallowed hard. She had plenty of respect for dogs, especially big ones.

  “He’s asking permission to join you on the couch.” Darcy sat at the opposite side of the oversized couch and pulled a blanket over her legs.

  “Is he allowed to?” Sabrina patted Khan’s head, which made his tail begin to wag.

  “Sure, he is, but I’ll leave it up to you while you’re staying here. If you rather he doesn’t, he’ll settle for the floor.” Darcy tilted her head as if Sabrina’s choice was of great importance.

  “Come on, then, Khan,” Sabrina said and patted the couch between them. “Just no drooling, please.”

  Khan climbed up and circled around himself twice before settling down with a deep sigh.

  “Some say dogs flatten the grass that way in the wild,” Darcy said, chuckling. “Now you’re going to be more than his friend—he’s going to see you as his hero.”

  “Oh, well, there’s a first for everything,” Sabrina said and pulled her lips into a crooked smile. “I’m not normally a dog person, but this one is…well, he feels special. And I do feel quite safe being here with the two of you.” Sabrina was amazed how true this was and aware of how unusual it was for her to freely admit it.

  They sat by the fire for a while, sipping their tea and just relaxing, but Sabrina knew such tranquility was only temporary. Sooner, rather than later, each of them had to deal with the other’s past. The ex-cop would have to level with the ex-victim. Sabrina clung to her mug, afraid what truths might be pulled into the light of the fire.

  Chapter Thirteen

  Darcy tried to wrap her brain around the fact that Sabrina was here in her home. Something about seeing her there on the couch, relaxed with her legs up, and scratching Khan’s head every now and then was surreal, but also so normal. After finishing her tea, Darcy placed her mug on the tray and removed the leftover sandwiches before Khan started drooling on the couch.

  Returning, she stoked the fire before curling up in her corner of her beloved sofa. She had inherited it from her aunt, Meghan’s mother, and it held wonderful childhood memories of when she and Meghan had watched all their favorite shows and movies here. She had managed to find a similar fabric when her aunt gifted it to her and had it reupholstered.

  “I think it’s time,” Sabrina said quietly. “If we’re going to have a chance to work together, we need to be truthful. Both of us.”

  Sabrina was right, but Darcy knew from experience what would happen once she’d shared her story and would have given anything for a few more moments in front of the fire with Sabrina. “All right.”

  “You look nervous. Don’t be. Just tell me.” Sabrina tilted her head, her half-dried hair falling onto her shoulder.

  “Yes. There’s a lot to this though.” Darcy sighed. “Okay. Here goes.” She scooted closer to Khan, as if the dog’s presence grounded her. She patted him gently, and he shifted drowsily until he had his head in her lap. “I worked for the East Quay police district for five years. I loved being a cop and thought I was good at it. I got along with my superiors and most of my peers, though a few of them were jackasses with a stick up their ass about my being a woman. You’d think in this day and age they’d be a bit less sexist, but some guys are clearly insecure.”

  Sabrina merely nodded, her expression stoic and unreadable.

  “One Friday evening, my partner and I were patrolling along the marina and the beaches, as it was spring break and kids were having beach parties.” Darcy thought she saw Sabrina flinch but wasn’t certain. “We were alerted to some disturbance over by the pier, and when we got there, two different groups of kids were arguing back and forth about something or other. I’m sure it was blown way out of proportion. Some boys were drunk and screwing around under the pier, which was dangerous as the tide was coming in. Several of the other kids warned us that a few of them carried knives of illegal sizes.”

  Khan shifted on her lap, looking up at Darcy with soulful eyes. Perhaps he sensed the tension building up within her.

  “Ivers and I went down under the pier to—”

  “Excuse me. Ivers? The same rude idiot that was in my office after the break-in?” Sabrina’s eyes became narrow slits.

  “Yup. The same lovely guy.”

  “I see. Go on.” Sabrina motioned with her hand.

  “When we got down there, we ran into two couples, who I assumed had been making out down there. Still, we were under orders to make sure no one else had any kind of knife on them since the mood was volatile among the kids. All the cops dispatched to the scene wore gloves, and we just hoped we wouldn’t stumble on any syringes and other drug paraphernalia.” Darcy res
ted her head in her hand, supporting it with her elbow on the backrest. “The couples were clean, and we made sure they left the beach below the pier since the water was actually sloshing around our feet.”

  Now, when she approached the experience that had ended her career with the police force, Darcy’s voice started to tremble. “We spotted three or four guys farther out under the pier. They were walking toward us, and I thought it was because the tide was coming in. The water level increases three feet when it’s high tide.” She tucked a blanket around herself and hid her hands between her thighs. “After that moment, my memory is scattered. According to my partner, the boys rushed toward us, and I called out, “Knife, knife” and pulled out my side arm. I must have panicked because I fired two shots. One bullet hit one of the pillars under the pier. The second hit one of the boys. As it turned out, none of them had a knife. I shot an unarmed boy and then fell as I lost my balance and hit my head on the pier’s foundation.” Darcy swallowed hard and wiped at her tears, her voice so raw and trembling now that she could barely speak. “The boy survived, but he’s confined to a wheelchair on some days. He isn’t expected to make a full recovery.”

  “And you have no memory of this incident?” Sabrina had wrapped her arms around her bent legs and propped her chin on her knees.

  “None. Apparently, the concussion I sustained gave me partial memory loss. My boss was furious and said it was the most convenient memory loss he’d ever heard about.” Darcy sobbed. “I know one thing is true. As hard as it’s been for me to come to terms with what I’ve done, it’s tons harder on the boy. He’ll need physical therapy the rest of his life. He couldn’t see the shooter, but Forensics found gun residue on my gloves, and the bullets came from my gun. I’ve met the boy and talked to him. It was the hardest thing I’ve ever done. He sued the district and me, of course. I destroyed his life. From my end, I pleaded no contest, as I honestly can’t remember anything after we sent the two couples on their way, and the case was settled out of court. That’s why I went from having a house without mortgage to one that’s mortgaged above the chimney and then some.”