Of Boys And Men: An Enemies to Lovers, New Adult College Romance (Ridge Rogues Book 1)

by Renee Harless

  “I’m sure you have an idea of what you’d like to do. I don’t even know your major.”

  It was the first time I had seen Ford look embarrassed as he tucked his chin closer to his chest. “Dual. I’m getting a degree in both mathematics and astronomy.”

  My jaw hung open at his declaration. “Wow, talk about feeling inadequate. I knew you were smart, but geez. If only the women on campus knew that the good looks also came with a brain,” I tried to joke and he answered with a soft chuckle. “So, you have no idea what you can do with those degrees?”

  “No. I mean, I have some ideas, but I just thought I’d see what happens after graduation this year. Aerospace, analytics, astrophysics, maybe go on for my masters. I don’t know yet.”

  I blinked in awe of him. Did he have any idea how incredible he sounded describing his career choices? Watching him speak, it seemed as if he was used to being criticized, as if he was ashamed. I was so beyond impressed there were no words.

  “And to think I had a genius kicking my chair this semester. Why are you in my class anyway?”

  “I’m only in the economics course to fill a general education credit. Why are you in there? What’s your major?”

  Together we killed time helping Rocky relax by making small talk. I told him about my degree in Biology and how I transferred here to be closer to my cousin, Willow, and I was fulfilling the master’s prerequisites. At some point, Rocky had fallen asleep, the short sporadic bursts of air from his lungs concerned me, but there wasn’t much I could do but continue to pet him as he slept. I knew that it brought him comfort. At some point, Ford, in his now dingy black jeans, moved beside me.

  “So, tell me more about the shelter,” he said.

  “I just. . . love animals and wildlife. I want to help rescue and heal them, take care of them if they’re orphaned, protect them if they’re unable to return to the wild.” Maybe that was what connected me with Ford - he was just like the animals I yearned to care for.

  “Will you move home to open it?”

  I tossed around how to answer the question. Should I give him the short version of wanting to spread my wings? Or should I go all in and explain why I left home to begin with? Ford wasn’t the kind of guy to stick around for the long term, so I didn’t have anything to lose by laying it all out there. I feared that the revelation would bring us closer. I just had to remember that Ford wasn’t boyfriend material, nor did I want one.

  “I’m not sure I’ll return to Alaska. I have to go home during winter break, but after that?” I shrugged my shoulders as if that completed my statement.

  “I’m guessing there is more to the story, isn’t there?”

  “How about this? If I tell you mine, you tell me yours. It’s only fair.”

  He smirked at me, and with his face so close, it took all my inner strength to keep from leaning forward and kissing him senseless.

  “We both know that I never play fair.” That was the definite truth.

  “What do you have to lose? It’s just Rocky and me.” The dog beneath my palm perked up at the sound of his name but immediately fell back to sleep.

  “Okay. You start.”

  “Fine. As I just told you, I’m from Alaska, a small town just outside of Anchorage. It’s beautiful there.

  “It wasn’t until I started middle school that I realized how strange my parents were. I mean, I knew that they were sort of odd, but they spent every weekend traveling around the city researching aliens – specifically the Japan Airlines Flight 1628. It’s pretty famous for crashing due to an alien encounter.

  “As a young kid, I thought it was completely normal, but you know how cruel kids can be, right? I learned early on that my parents were different, so I kept quiet about all of the plane crashes and recordings they investigated with friends. They call themselves researchers, but they’re no different than ambulance chasers that somehow secure grants for funding. Neither of my parents has actual jobs.”

  I had turned my attention to Rocky as I spoke, but I was surprised when I turned my head to glance at Ford. He had bent one knee and rested his elbow on top, using his hand to support his chin. He looked as if he was genuinely interested in what I was saying. I couldn’t fight against the small smile that grew on my lips.

  “Is that why you came to Boston? To get away from your parents’ strange lifestyle?”

  I shook my head before responding. “No. Heck, I wish my parents being weird was the worst thing I had to go through. I left because I needed to escape.”

  Ford tensed at my words, and I wish that I had described it better, but it was exactly what I had done against my parents’ wishes – I escaped to save myself. I immediately moved my attention back to Rocky. This was the part that changed how people saw me. It changed how I saw myself.

  “In high school, I began dating the new boy in school. The people that were my so-called friends began to despise me for it. But I was blissfully unaware, you know?” I took a heavy and deep breath that filled my lungs as I reached the next part of my story – the story that defined who I was today. “At a summer party, David, my boyfriend, and I were kissing under a shaded willow tree while his friends hung around the bonfire. There was music, drinking, and everyone was being loud and raucous, you know? We were all sixteen and excited for the summer.

  “David. . .he, um. . .spiked my drink and took my virginity from me without my consent. The drink had pretty much paralyzed my body but I had my wits about me. It was agonizing, I felt the pain, I felt. . .everything. And what made it worse was that his friends knew what he was doing. One even got a grainy video on his phone.

  “I went to the police and had a test, but. . .you see, David’s father was the new head of the police department and pulled strings to have everything ignored. Even though there was a video, everyone said I had asked for it. The ridicule and teasing became too much. There was no way I was returning to school. My mother ended up homeschooling me until I graduated.

  “My parents did a complete one-eighty after the incident. They went from free-spirited hippies to strict and orthodox. The constant overbearing nature became too much, so once I fulfilled my biology degree, I took Willow up on the offer to move here.

  “So, that’s it, that’s my story,” I declared as I returned my gaze to his.

  Before I could utter another word, Ford reached a hand up to the back of my head and drew me in for a kiss. It was unlike anything I had ever experienced. We had been both passionate and unyielding in our desires before, but this kiss spoke of so much more. Strength. Comprehension. Need. Ford’s lips were pressed against mine as if he couldn’t fathom them being anywhere else. He was trying to take my pain into himself. The pain of being an outcast, of being demoralized, of having my childhood stolen. He possessed me with the simplest of kisses. And if I had thought for one second that I had the power to preserve my heart from him, I had been sorely mistaken. It only took a single kiss to realize that I had fallen for him — hook, line, and sinker. I fell for the man that kept himself tucked behind a wall of concrete and I only hoped that I could chisel away at its exterior.

  Ford pulled back, just enough so that he could run his hand across my hair, like he was making sure that I was real. “Was I the first after. . .you know?” he asked.

  And I swore that I saw disappointment flash across his face when I shook my head. “No, I, uh, had a couple of one-night stands, but never any relationships. I’ve steered clear of them, to be honest.”

  I couldn’t tell if he was relieved or saddened by the realization that I had been with others since the incident.

  “I’m okay, Ford. I’ve just spent a lot of time focusing on school and what it will take to get my animal rescue off the ground. Relationships haven’t been particularly important. I saw a therapist for a while and I’ve learned that none of it was my fault.

  “David may have been cleared of all charges, but karma came back around. He was in a bad car accident his freshman year of college and lost his footbal
l scholarship because he had been drunk. I’m fairly certain he is working at the fish market now.”

  “You’re pretty incredible, you know that?”

  “So, what’s your story? What makes Ford, Ford?”

  I could see that he was weighing his answer deliberately, deciding what ugly parts to keep secret. I had hoped that by telling him the deepest and most dreadful part of me that he would be willing to do the same. But Ford reminded me so much of the animals I yearned to care for. He was skittish and would always protect himself first.

  “Rutherford. My full name is Rutherford James O’Brien and my birth father is Senator Rutherford Hastings.”

  Ford quieted the instant the words left his mouth and I wondered if he wished he could take them back. I didn’t know much about politics, but Senator Hastings was very well known and rumors swirled that he was gearing for a presidential run. But my memory of Senator Hastings was of a much older man with a trophy wife at his side. I knew his children were closer to my parents’ age, so imagining him as Ford’s father was proving to be extremely difficult. There was a resemblance, though. Something that I immediately recognized when Ford turned to me – his eyes. The sparkling blue irises and long lashes were identical to his father’s. No one would be able to question it. But at the same time, it left me wondering how his mother was involved.

  Senator Hastings was known as a family man. Tabloids and papers published pictures of him with his children and grandchildren. I was pretty confident I had seen some reports on television. I wasn’t well versed, but no one had ever mentioned affairs or illegitimacy.

  “My mother worked for Hastings as an assistant while she was working through law school. She was young and naive, and he took advantage of that. My mother never gave me the sordid details, but when she fell pregnant, he had made promises that he had zero intentions of keeping. He wanted my mother to abort me, but she wouldn’t.

  “He was furious and made all kinds of threats to her and her family. But all she asked was that he sign my birth certificate in his name as my father and she would never come after a single penny. She’s kept her word all these years.”

  My mind was drowning as I tried to keep up with the information. It all seemed like something from a movie – not real life. How could people be so cruel and deliberately take advantage of someone?

  “I’m trying to grasp everything you’re telling me. What happened to your mother? I thought you were adopted.”

  Ford’s eyes glazed over as I asked my question. His entire body tensed and then quickly dissolved as he brought his knees toward his chest, rested his arms on top, then drooped his head over the crossed limbs.

  “I’ve never told anyone what happened, Jolee. My cousin suspects, but it’s never been out in the open.”

  “You don’t have to tell me, Ford. It’s okay.” And it was. He had shared more than I ever imagined, and while we were here in the dirty dog kennel, it seemed as if our confessions had brought us closer together.

  “No, no. I need to tell someone. I’m pretty certain it’s been eating away at me for so long that I’m hollow inside.”

  Ford’s back rose and fell as he took each solid breath, working through whatever secrets he kept locked away. I waited patiently, rubbing Rocky’s soft fur for so long that when Ford began to speak again, I startled.

  “When I was four, a group of officers arrived at the apartment my mom and I were living in. It all happened so fast and the screams that came from my mother still wake me at night sometimes.

  “I remember the night so vividly. She had been working at a bookstore to pay for school since she could no longer be near the law office where my birth father worked. It was her last year of law school and our neighbor had been watching me whenever mom was gone. She was making my favorite mac and cheese when the officers entered the apartment.

  “A social worker immediately scooped me up and placed me in an ugly burgundy car that smelled like burnt popcorn. I screamed out for my mother as they wheeled her out strapped to a gurney.

  “I was too young to remember much more than hopping from foster home to foster home until Tracy and Adam took me in. She was the first one to take me to visit my mother in the psychiatric hospital. My mom wasn’t crazy, though. I knew it, Tracy knew it, and so did the caregivers, but they were forced by the state to keep her confined in the building.

  “I think after so long, my mother gave up trying to fight it. Every appeal and case she tried to take to the courts was thrown out. Every single one for almost twenty years.”

  This tale he wove seemed so outrageous that I couldn’t wrap my head around all of the details. She was living a mother’s worst nightmare and there was nothing she could do to stop it. Realization dawned on me suddenly and I had never felt so low in my entire life. “Ford, I can’t. . .I can’t believe I had said that thing about your mother and how she raised you. No wonder you looked like you could have strangled me if you had the chance,” I confessed shamefully. I wanted to dig myself a grave and bury myself in it.

  “It’s okay. You didn’t know.”

  “It’s not okay. Not at all,” I argued.

  Ford suddenly sat up and ran his hand through his hair as he looked over at me. “It is, just drop it.”

  “Fine. So, what do you think happened?”

  “I think my sperm donor and his family set up my mother.”

  Ford said this with such conviction, as if there was no other possible explanation and no one would be able to convince him otherwise. I wanted to ask more, I wanted to understand if this was why he was so closed off from everyone, but beneath my hand, I noticed that Rocky’s shallow breathing had halted.

  “Oh, no,” I whimpered as I turned away from Ford and pressed my other hand to the Labrador’s chest.

  “What happened?” Ford asked as he crawled along the floor to get a better look at the dog.

  “He was tired and gave up the fight.” Forcing a smile on my lips I glanced at Ford, who had shifted again onto his backside. He glared at me as if I had ended Rocky’s life myself.

  “Gave up? How could he give up? He has a family that loves him and needs him to fight for his life. Didn’t he know that?”

  It donned on me that Ford and Rocky were synonymous. Each of them had something significant and life-changing happen to them. Rocky’s fate had been determined, but Ford’s was still up in the air.

  Despite my sadness at Rocky’s passing, the dog essentially was the reason Ford and I had come together to begin with. I spun toward Ford and laid my hand on his wrist to get his attention.

  “He was ready to go, Ford. Rocky was comfortable with us here, probably happy, to be honest. Sometimes we have to learn to let go.”

  From beside me, Ford’s body shook slightly, and I couldn’t help but call out his name again to get his attention. “Ford.”

  I’m not sure what I had been expecting when he would respond, but seeing the tears building across his eyes, the blue swirling like a whirlpool, drew me closer.

  “Come on. I’ll let Ken know about Rocky, but there is another place I want to show you. It’s my favorite place to go when something like this happens.”

  We said our goodbyes to Rocky and I was comforted knowing that when the sweet Labrador passed, he felt love and kindness from Ford and me. Ken seemed to be equally as heartbroken when I told him the news, but my friend was much quicker at composing himself.

  As I guided Ford down another hall, I reached out a comforting hand toward him, and I was surprised at how he latched onto it. His rough fingers interlaced between mine and squeezed. I had never had my hand held like this, as if I were his lifeline. My mind raced from thoughts of me and Ford, a great distraction from what had happened with Rocky, that I almost missed the door to what I liked to call Happiness Hallway. All of the other staff referred to it as Mess Hall.

  “Here we are!” I exclaimed as I turned to look at Ford, hoping he could channel some of the excitement I was feeling.

  “Wher
e is here?”

  With an enthusiastic smile, I pulled my hand from Ford’s and used it to slide my badge through the electronic lock and open the door.

  Loud and overzealous barking ensued as the door opened farther into the space.

  “This is where we keep all of the puppies. If you prefer kittens, they are across the way, but I always find that puppies are much better attuned to my sadness, personally.”

  It took a moment of Ford walking in the space and witnessing the overenthusiastic pups as they bounced and squirmed in their kennels wanting his attention for his frown to dissipate. I opened the gate to the first kennel and stepped inside, immediately closing the door to the escape artists, where about five mixed-breed puppies jumped on their hind legs for us. I scooped one up in my arms and set him in Ford’s. The puppy blinked at Ford and then licked at his chin. We both laughed at the puppy’s excited kisses.

  “Yeah, this isn’t so bad,” Ford said as I sat with my back against the gate and allowed the remaining puppies to crawl all over me. “I can see why you want to open a shelter.”

  “Rescue,” I clarified. “We will be able to shelter animals if they are unable to return to the wild, but I want to save and return the ones that I can. We can’t stop the circle of life, you know, but I want to do whatever I can to help the helpless.”

  Once the puppies in the kennel had had their fill, zonking out in the corner, we moved through the remaining five runs. Puppies would get very jealous if they didn’t get equal attention.

  “You said you studied Biology, right?”

  “Yep,” I said, holding a Border Collie puppy that was missing one eye. The breeder didn’t want to keep a dog that he couldn’t sell. I kind of wanted to keep the puppy for myself. “I have a degree in Biology with a concentration in wildlife and conservation.”

  “Wow, ever think of being a veterinarian?”

  “I did, for a long time, but the veterinarian field is very specialized when you plan on opening a business. Like, I’d have to decide on large animals, reptiles, that sort of thing. With a rescue, I can help so much more.”