With This Ring, I'm Confused

by Kristin Billerbeck

“Already? Purvi, it’s just seven.”

  “It’s 10:00 p.m. in Taiwan. Think internationally, Ashley!”

  “What time is it in India? Couldn’t you call a cousin?” I suggest.

  “Don’t think because you got me hired, I can’t let you go,” Purvi threatens.

  “Hey, it was just a friendly suggestion. Helping family relations, that’s all. Isn’t Gainnet concerned with the ‘whole’ employee?” I say, quoting the latest jargon to hit the bulletin board. New Age with a dash of false concern: Oh yeah, I’m feeling whole. A whole lotta garbage!

  “I don’t expect you to go to Taiwan, but I do expect you to have the documentation on my desk by Monday.”

  “But I have a red egg and ginger party today.”

  “Then it’s a good thing I woke you up so you can get started.” She hangs up, and if Purvi wasn’t the best boss I ever had, I’d tell her what she could do with her documentation. I’m not a morning person. Have I mentioned that?

  I close my eyes and whisper a silent prayer. I’m not ready for the day, but the day is here, regardless. I feel a surge of delight as I realize it’s a Kevin day! It’s been nearly a week since I saw him, and I actually ache for him. I need to look into his green eyes and maybe be reminded one more time that he does not want Confederate soldiers at our wedding.

  I open my door and smell pancakes and fresh coffee. It’s heavenly. I follow my nose to the kitchen and find Kay over crepes with her specialty cream whipper at the ready.

  “What are you doing?” I eye her suspiciously.

  “I thought you’d be mad at me,” Kay says. “I’m trying to make it up to you. Blessed are the peacemakers and all that.”

  “I’m not angry, Kay. I’m too stressed to be angry. Did it go well last night?”

  She nods her head vigorously. “We had a nice time, Ashley. He looked so broken when Emily wasn’t here. I just couldn’t let him walk out our door like that.” She shakes her head. “Wouldn’t have been Christian.”

  “No, you were right.” I rub my forehead. “I was rude. I hope you apologized for me. I haven’t been myself since Purvi told me I was going to Taiwan and my wedding plans were hijacked. I barely see Kevin as it is, and his sister is making me forget that he’s quite normal. What if he has a good bit of Emily down deep, and after we get married it bubbles up like Glenn Close in that bathtub scene?”

  “Are you all right? You look pale.”

  I sit down at the table. “She canceled my wedding dress order, Kay. How basic is that? That a woman knows what she wants to look like on her wedding day?” I look at Kay and feel a tear escape down my cheek. “Marrying Kevin means I’ll see these people for the rest of my life, and I just don’t want to mess with anything that keeps Emily here in town. If that means buying two dresses, so be it.” But I don’t have the money for another dress.

  Kay lets out a deep sigh and serves me a plate.

  I shake my head. “Oh, thanks, Kay, but I’m having breakfast with Kevin.”

  She pulls the plate away. “Then you’ll feel better when you get back. He’ll remind you why you’re getting married. If you have to wear something off the rack, Kevin will be there, remember? Emily is not Kevin. But I have to say her taste in men is pretty good.” A slow, dreamy smile spreads across Kay’s face.

  Rhett’s at my feet, panting for attention. I take his sturdy head in my hands and rub his ears. “You’re right. I’m just whiny, I guess because I’m tired.”

  “It’s always something, Ashley.”

  I pour myself a glass of orange juice. “So tell me about the stalker.”

  “Stop calling him that!” Kay bangs her plate at the table. “It was wonderful, like I said.”

  “So what’s his real story?”

  “He told you his real story, Ashley. He’s divorced, as all the men my age are. Either divorced or dangerously narcissistic; take your pick.” She puts a tofu sausage down for Rhett, who promptly sniffs and snubs the fake meat. “It was good practice for next weekend when Simon comes back.” Then she halts her fork, and a smile lights up her whole face. “I went on a date, Ash! And I didn’t fall over in the shoes you gave me. I even wore makeup. I can hardly believe it. I’m a new woman!”

  “You looked great. It was a pity none of the guys from church came last night. It would have given them a chance to see what they’ve been missing. I’d have given anything to see their faces.”

  Kay bites into her lip. “Oh, I actually forgot to call them last night.”

  “Kay! You forgot something? You told me last night. Remember? This guy Simon does have you flustered. Matt Callaway could have been a monster.”

  She’s laughing at me.

  “He could have!”

  She’s still laughing.

  “I’m leaving.” I turn back to face her. “By the way, what does Matt Callaway do for a living?”

  “He’s a patent attorney. So you’re right, he probably is a monster.” She giggles again, and I have to say, it’s good to see Kay giddy. Totally unexpected, but good.

  “I’m going to get a cappuccino before breakfast. See ya,” I say before closing the door behind me.

  I stand on the front path for a time and just feel the sunshine on my face. Its warmth fills me with energy. I could almost forget I have to tell Kevin about Kay stealing his sister’s date, and the little conflict we’re having over a wedding dress. Just what a pediatric surgeon needs to hear about: a catfight. And it’s not even a good catfight like you get on a nighttime soap opera. There are no slinky dresses, no pool to fall into, not even a good wrestling match. Just two women vying for ultimate power over silk—well, really, over Kevin.

  I hear a couple of beeps and see Kevin’s car parked at the curb. He opens his window, “Hey, hot stuff, going my way?”

  “What are you doing here? I thought we were meeting at the restaurant.”

  “I just got off work, and I couldn’t wait.”

  Be still my heart. “You haven’t slept?” I say as I get into the car.

  “I slept a bit. On the cot at work.”

  “That’s not sleeping. Don’t you know you’re going to permanently disrupt your circadian rhythm? Even a light on when you sleep blocks pineal gland stimulation, which can cause a drop in melatonin—and don’t even get me started on messing up your body’s internal clock!”

  Kevin is staring at me, his perfect teeth hidden behind an open mouth. “Have you been watching public television again, Ashley?”

  I take a little pride here. “No, I read it in a health magazine at the gym in my office, actually.”

  He smiles at me, and all my troubles melt away. I’m in love. I’m so in love, and you know what they say? Love is blind. But one needs eyes with Kevin. He’s so incredibly gorgeous. And I don’t say that as his fiancée. If anything, that was a major stumbling block for me. I don’t need the pressure of a guy who looks like Hugh Jackman. What woman does? We all know the reality of what we look like in the morning.

  He leans over and kisses me gently on the cheek. “How are things going with the wedding planning?” Kevin starts the car and smiles toward me before taking off.

  Alrighty then. Do I dive right in and tell him that I’m pondering Vegas and the Starlight Room for our reception? Or that perhaps his sister is better off in an institution rather than planning our wedding? I decide to avoid the subject altogether. We’ll get there, but I think we need to take it slow.

  “So will you have to work tonight? Or can you come to the red egg and ginger party with me?” He doesn’t answer me before my cell phone rings. “I don’t have to answer it,” I say as I stare at the ringing phone with itchy fingers. I cannot stand to hear a ringing phone. It’s ripe with possibilities, isn’t it? It could be the patent office, telling me I’m a genius and they’ve never seen work like mine. It could be my boss saying they’ve sold off production in Taiwan and I don’t ever have to go back. It could be the jeweler saying they gave me the wrong diamond when they sized the ring. Mine is
actually twice as big and has a matching Tacori platinum band.

  “Answer it, for heaven’s sake, before you lose it altogether.” Kevin’s grinning, so I peer at my phone, but I must admit, seeing it’s my brother I’m a little less excited about it.

  “Hi, Dave.”

  “Ashley, I need your help,” Dave says, his voice filled with desperation.

  “You need my help? This ought to be good.”

  “I need you to go make a deposit for the red egg and ginger party. It’s at Ping’s in Palo Alto, and . . . well, I just need your help.”

  “Ping’s?” Pick the most expensive Chinese restaurant in the Bay Area, why don’t you? “What kind of deposit are we talking?”

  “Two thousand dollars. I’ll pay you back!”

  He won’t.

  “Didn’t they need it before today?”

  “I bounced the check, okay, Ashley? They’re threatening to cancel the whole thing. Does it make you feel good to know that your big brother is a loser?”

  Clamping mouth shut now. “Dave, I’m sorry. I just thought—”

  “All of Mei Ling’s extended family is here. Some of them are even here from China. This party is a really big deal, and it’s my chance to prove that she didn’t marry down. It’s bad enough I’m not from her culture.” He pauses. “Are you going to make me beg? Because I’m begging, Ash. If Ping’s cancels the party, you might as well cancel me from Mei Ling’s family. And that leaves Davey cut off from his Chinese heritage.”

  If he could, Dave would buy Mei Ling everything her heart desired. Unfortunately, on a bus driver’s salary, his hands are tied. Mei Ling is a saint, and I’d like to say that I see what she saw in my brother. But alas, I’m a little confused there. Mei Ling is dainty and feminine, and Dave? Well, Dave’s a bit Neanderthal, with a Dr Pepper and a remote control on his person at all times. Seeing him with Mei Ling and his son, though, reminds you that he has a heart of gold. He’d do anything for them. Even work.

  “Dave, I’m not going to make you beg,” I say. “You just didn’t give me a chance to answer. I’ll drop by Ping’s after breakfast. Everything will be fine, I promise.” But secretly, I think about my checkbook and the flowers I’ve paid for and the dress I’ll have to buy, and I admit I’m a little nervous. The house purchase was more of a stretch than I thought it would be. No one mentioned the nasty tax bill twice a year! Californians seem to have a fetish for taxes and bond measures. It used to only affect my buying power at Bloomingdale’s. Now, with a house, it’s serious!

  “Don’t tell Mei Ling, please,” Dave implores.

  “Don’t worry. I’ve got it covered.” I hang up the phone and look at my handsome fiancé. Two thousand dollars is nothing. That party is going to cost at least five, and that leaves my wedding dress out in the cold, I think.

  “Is everything all right?”

  “I just have to run an errand after breakfast. Is that all right?”

  “Sure. So you didn’t tell me, how are the wedding plans coming?”

  “You didn’t tell me, are you coming to the party tonight?”

  “I want to, Ashley, but I’m going to need a nap. And I promised my sister I’d take her by the florist. She wants to coordinate something. She has drawings for the florist.”

  I’ll bet she does. “I’ve made the deposit with the florist already. Kevin, I’ve been meaning to talk to you about that—”

  “I’m so thrilled you’re letting her do this, Ashley. It’s the first time I’ve ever seen her really excited about a job and finding her niche in life. When she failed the Mensa test, everything just went downhill for her. She—”

  “Wait a minute. What did you say?”

  Kevin whacks his forehead. “That’s a family secret. Emily didn’t actually pass the test for membership. Her IQ was too low, but only according to the test. She’s very bright.”

  Uh, yeah! That’s what I’ve been saying. “Why is that such a big deal in your family anyway? I’ve been in Silicon Valley my whole life. Some of the most intellectual people on earth live here, and I’ve never heard anyone talk about Mensa before you. Not even the physicists!”

  “It’s a long story.”

  “I’ve got time. Definitely more time than money. There’s got to be a road to enlightenment here, because it is odd. I don’t think you realize how odd. Not Mensa, but your family’s preoccupation with it. What’s up with that?”

  “You’re calling my family odd ?” He just laughs. He knows full well they’re odd.

  “Just wondering where the fascination with Mensa comes from.” I shrug as if it’s no skin off my nose, but what the heck?

  Kevin pulls the car into the Hobee’s parking lot. He looks at me with his deep green eyes, and something about his gaze makes me think I’m not going to like this story. He lets out a long, haggard breath and starts.

  “When my dad was in med school, all his fellow doctors were marrying Southern belles from high school and debutante parties. They had all been turned out and raised accordingly. My dad had a bit of disdain for them because he didn’t want a trophy wife. He wanted to marry up, but not financially. Intellectually. He sort of ‘auditioned’ women for the role of his wife. He told them it would be fun to take an IQ test, knowing what the IQ for genius was. Mensa wasn’t too active in the States back then. Most of the women failed his criteria, probably because they were starting to see how strange my father’s ‘good time’ was, and shortly after, my dad would break things off. If they hadn’t broken up with him first.”

  “Consider me informed. I don’t think I want to know any more.” Because I’m thinking that Kevin is now sporting alien antennae.

  “Ashley, I’m not marrying you for your IQ.” Kevin takes my hand. “It’s definitely your body I’m after.”

  We both break into laughter, and I slap his arm. I look into Kevin’s eyes, and I know he is genuine. He is solid and in love with the Lord. He is a new creation in Christ, but I just can’t help worrying about his DNA. How will he parent? Will he send our egghead kid to college at twelve? Kevin slides his sunglasses on as we get ready to go the restaurant, and I have this horrifying vision of little Kevin Jr. wearing coke-bottle glasses taped at the rim.

  “Ashley, are you ready?”

  I shake off my thoughts. “Yeah, yeah, I’m ready.”

  “Good. Because I want to talk to you about our house.” Kevin opens the door to the restaurant.

  “Our house?”

  “Where we’re going to live.”

  “I guess I just assumed we would live at your place until we found a place of our own. We can’t exactly move in with Kay, especially not with your hours.”

  “And all the noises we might make.”

  I think about that and blush rosy red.

  Kevin shakes his head and smiles. But this smile has a bit too much enthusiasm. “Ash, my parents are making a down payment on a house as a wedding gift.”

  I feel my head shaking of its own volition. “As in, we pick out a house and they put the down payment on it?”

  “I didn’t really ask. I figured it was so generous that—”

  “Ask, Kev! I don’t mean to be ungrateful, but . . .” Next thing you know, they’re buying us a triplex, and Emily’s on one side and they’re on the other. “Definitely ask.”

  “Does it matter where we live?”

  Oh heavens, those eyes. “No, it doesn’t matter a bit,” I say dreamily.

  7

  Kevin attracts attention just sitting here. Can you imagine what people would think if they knew he was a children’s surgeon? I mean, he doesn’t walk on water, and of course, we all know he’s human, but considering my generation thinks Ben Affleck is the cat’s pajamas, I’m naturally a little freaked that the other shoe might drop. That Kevin might see that he and Ashley Stockingdale are as different as Prada and Kmart. Although I wouldn’t be caught dead in anything by Jaclyn Smith, I think.

  Kevin sits across from me in the restaurant and takes my hands in
his. This is the one I picked. The one who picked me. We were made by God for each other. Not bad. All those years of searching. Had I known it was going to be this good, I would definitely have had more faith.

  Of course, I picked him for all the practical reasons too:

  WHY DR. KEVIN NOVAK IS PERFECT FOR ME

  1. He has a job.

  2. He does not “need” me.

  3. He is ready to get married and shares my family goals.

  4. He understands my shoe fetish.

  5. He likes to eat out.

  6. He thinks video games are for children.

  7. He understands that every new handbag deserves a compliment.

  8. He works with children. He doesn’t hang out with them.

  9. He has an obvious blind spot and loves me!

  Currently, I’m ignoring my fears about my future husband’s family. Only because I see Kevin as the support system of his family, not part of the chaos, but one never really knows. Do they?

  Before I make him sound perfect, let me say he’s a complete workaholic, and like my boss, Purvi, he will probably have his coffin wired with a T1 line. Even now he’s tapping his fingers nervously on the table, not even opening his menu. He can’t be bothered with small decisions like what type of meal he’ll eat. He generally is at the hospital cafeteria, so the quality of a meal has little bearing on his life. He just wants nourishment set in front of him without his having to make a decision.

  “Is there something you need to tell me?” I ask.

  He lets out a ragged breath. “How did you know?”

  My heart is beating rapidly. Maybe he’s about to tell me about his “thing” for women’s undergarments (on himself!) or that he’s been married three times previously and forgot to mention it. Or maybe he’s really handsome because he went on Extreme Makeover, and he loves me because he used to be a troll like me. That really he looks like Shrek and without his platform heels, he’s only as tall as Farquat. I close my eyes tight. “Hit me with it.”

  “What?”

  “Just say what you have to say. Let’s get it over with. How bad could it be?” I ask.

  “That depends on your idea for the future.”