by KT Webb
I grab my coffee again and finish it in record time. I’ll just continue living with the Hanover’s until it’s time to move. The only other thing I have to deal with is telling Julio. I hope he understands that I can’t plan my life around his sudden return to my life.
Chapter 11
When I arrive at work the next day, I’m surprised to find Miles already in his office with the door closed. I didn’t want to see his face anyway. I can’t take a fake apology. I can’t handle his excuses. I pop my head into Theo’s office.
“CeCe, come in! Ella was worried sick when you weren’t at the house in the morning. Thankfully Isaac sent us a text telling us you’d ended up at their house or I’m certain she would have filed a missing person’s report.”
“I’m sorry, I had to go take care of some things and didn’t want to call and wake you guys up.”
“No problem. I know it’s none of my business, but I think you and Miles will work through whatever issues you’ve encountered. That’s what family does.”
If only he knew. I nod kindly and decide to let him know why I’m in his office.
“Theo, I’ve decided to go to Harvard.”
“Wonderful. Then we have some paperwork to do, and I’ll have my realtor look for a place to rent while you’re there.”
“Thank you, you really don’t have to do any of this.”
“Yes, I do.”
Later while I’m entering information into the Jenkins file, Miles calls me on my desk phone. My heartbeat increases as I contemplate not answering. Then I decide to be a grown-up.
“What can I do for you, sir?”
He’s silent, probably surprised by my cordial tone and formal greeting.
“Can you come into my office please? We need to discuss my calendar for the week.”
“Of course.”
I hang up and take a steadying breath. I can’t let him see how hurt I am. I grab my planner and make my way down the hall to his office. When I open the door, I want to puke. Miles has filled the room with red roses. Is he fucking serious? Does he even know me?
I turn to leave but he catches my arm, maneuvers himself around me and closes the door. He stands in front of it to block my exit.
“Just let me explain.”
“There’s nothing to explain. We are not having this conversation. Not here, not ever. Please move.”
“No. I need you to sit down and listen to me.”
I cross my arms and lean against the wall. I know I’m being obstinate, but I don’t give a shit. If he’s going to force me to stay in here and listen, I’ll be damned if I’m going to follow instructions. When he realizes he’s not going to get me to be any more compliant, he starts his speech.
“What you walked in on the other night was not what it looked like.”
How cliché.
“She showed up at the apartment and said she wanted to apologize for her behavior. I let her in and we talked for a few hours. I told her she was an awful person and that even if she earned forgiveness, she still had to change.”
Whatever. He may have convinced himself of that, but I wasn’t buying it.
“I hadn’t told her you were gone. When she asked where you were, I told her “out”. She must have heard your keys in the door because she suddenly launched herself at me and stuck her tongue down my throat. When I saw you, I knew it had all been a charade.”
I roll my eyes and don’t move. The smell of the roses is starting to nauseate me and I just want him to finish saying whatever else he’s going to say so I can leave without causing a scene.
“After you left, I lost it. She wanted to call the police because you hit her, but I told her I would tell them it was self-defense. She had no reason to be there, and then for her to do that. . .” his voice breaks off and I narrow my eyes at him.
“Here’s the thing, Miles. I don’t give a shit. The only reason I even came to the apartment was to tell you I’d made up my mind,” I pause to keep my emotions at bay, if he only knew how close I’d been to staying and being with him. “I’m going to Harvard.”
He sinks to the floor. He’s on his knees in front of me and the next thing he does makes me want to kick him in the balls. Miles reaches into his pocket and pulls out a ring box. No. Fucking. Way.
“CeCe, I’ve been in love with you for a long time. I know you’re going to move away, but I want you to take this with you. I want you to know that this is my promise to you that I am in this for the long haul, I will still love you when you come home after law school. I will still love you even if you don’t love me.”
“Are you fucking serious right now? This is how you’re going to fix everything? Miles, get off the floor.”
He looks up at me with tears in his eyes. I feel like a total bitch but I just can’t bring myself to care. He destroyed the trust I’d built in him. I know he’s not lying to me, but I don’t want to tell him that. It’s better if I don’t feed a stray.
“I need to get back to work. You should probably get rid of all of these,” I gesture to the roses, “And put that thing away.”
Miles is completely lost. Part of me is a bit smug. His heart is in a million pieces, but so is mine. How could he have possibly thought I would want to marry him? Especially after the scene with Chelsea at his apartment.
“Listen, someday we can go back to the way things were before. We can be like brother and sister again. But it’s going to take time. And you’re going to have to let this go. I am not the right girl for you, Miles. Do yourself a favor and find a nice little blonde who isn’t as much of a bitch as the last one.”
I leave the office and head straight for the file room. I can’t keep the tears back any longer. I punch the nearest filing cabinet and sink to the ground. Is this what I’ve been reduced to? A whimpering mess in the filing room of a law firm. Some lawyer I’ll be. Once I collect my thoughts and stop crying, I stand up, dust off my clothes and walk back into the hallway.
I don’t know what to think when Miles grabs my hand from his office door and brings me into his office. He kisses me and roughly grabs my hair. Despite being momentarily excited, I try to shove away from him. He clings to me desperately. I arch against him in an effort to put some distance between us but he thinks it’s an invitation. He reaches down to unbutton my pants. I pinch his arm, hard.
“Ow, what the hell?”
“I can’t,” I say as a tear escapes my eye.
He forces the breath out of his lungs and runs a hand through his hair. “I’m sorry. I just thought. . .”
“What that you could fuck me one more time before I leave?”
“What? No! I thought maybe this was all you wanted.”
“Sex? Yes, there was a time when it was all I wanted from a man. But things are different now. Despite how badly I want it, it doesn’t feel the way it used to.”
Miles is dumbfounded. “I didn’t think it felt so bad.”
I roll my eyes at his stupid sexy grin. “That’s not what I meant. I don’t want to talk about this.”
“Well, I do.”
“Well, too fucking bad. You don’t get to dictate what I do.”
“You are so frustrating.”
Before I have a chance to answer, there’s a knock on the door. Miles opens it to reveal Theo standing on the other side.
“Where did all these roses come from, Miles? Don’t tell me you’ve got another girl on the hook!”
“Not exactly, dad. It’s a long story. What’s up?”
“Your mother is very excited about CeCe’s announcement and wants to have a big family dinner on Friday to celebrate. Attendance is mandatory so clear your calendars.” He winks at us before wrinkling his nose. “Get rid of these damn things, they smell terrible.”
I take the opportunity to sneak out of the office and return to my desk. My mind is still reeling from the events of the day. I can’t believe Miles thought it was a good idea to propose to me. As if things weren’t complicated enough already.
&nbs
p; Chapter 12
“I’m glad to see I’ve been upgraded to a dinner date,” Julio jokes as he pulls a chair out for me at our table.
“Just don’t make me regret it.”
“You are a feisty one! So, not that I’m not thrilled to join you for dinner, but I’m interested to know what urgent news you wanted to discuss.”
I spread my napkin across my lap. We decided to eat at an upscale restaurant to avoid large, boisterous crowds. I want to have a real conversation with my father without straining to hear him. I decide it’s time to fill him in on what life has been like for me.
“I was recently told that I have a problem letting people in. I have a solid wall built around me that very few people have been given the opportunity to see beyond. I’m going to let you have a window in that wall.”
“Sounds like a good start.”
“Literally the only thing I remember about you is the day you walked out the door on my fourth birthday. Mom wasn’t exactly forthcoming with any details about you, and I didn’t care to ask. As far as I was concerned, you bailed,” I pause, but not long enough for him to interject, “Mom sucked. My stepfather sucked. I had no idea she was sick until the day I found her body.”
“Oh, Celia. I had no idea you found her.”
I hold up my hand to let him know it’s no big deal, “It really didn’t affect me as much as you might think. It was the time afterward that changed me. I had no one. I ended up in a group home because no one wanted a teenage Latina from a broken home. It didn’t matter that I worked hard at school. It didn’t matter that I wasn’t in trouble with the law. I wasn’t a baby. I wasn’t a clean slate that could be molded into the perfect child. I was damaged goods.”
The waiter stops at the table and asks for our drink order. We go ahead and order our meals in an effort to limit the number of interruptions. I can tell Julio appreciates the effort I’m making to give him a glimpse into my life.
“I graduated at the top of my class. I got a full ride to college. I met Olivia and her family. For the first time in my life, I finally found people who accepted me and loved me for who I was. They adopted me without worrying about my past. They never asked if I was a miscreant, they never questioned my efforts to grow closer to them. They love me. Theo and Ella have actually asked me to officially change my last name to Hanover.”
I study his face for a negative reaction, but found none. Good. If I’d changed my name to Hanover it wouldn’t have been his business. It’s not like the Martinez name has done me any favors.
“Before you returned to my life, I was struggling with a difficult decision. There were a number of other factors that complicated things further, but those don’t matter anymore. I am going to law school this fall. I applied to a few different schools and received acceptance letters to all of them, but the one that threw me for a loop was actually not one I ever expected to get into. I’ve been accepted to Harvard Law School.”
Julio’s eyes widen slightly. “Impressive. Congratulations.”
“I’ve been really struggling with the decision, but I’ve come to the conclusion that I deserve this. I’ve worked my ass off to get to this point, and that acceptance letter means the world to me. There are definitely things that could keep me here, but I don’t want to spend my life wondering what would have happened.”
“So, you’re moving away,” he does his best not to sound disappointed.
I nod. “I hope you understand.”
“Of course I do. Did you receive a scholarship for this schooling as well? I don’t want you to leave school with a mountain of debt.”
His question catches me off guard. Is he indicating that I shouldn’t do this because it’s more than I can afford? If so, he isn’t wrong, but it’s also none of his business.
He must have read my expression because he quickly continues, “I only ask because I want to help you. Believe it or not, I’m fairly well-off. My career with the Navy and lack of frivolous spending has allowed me to save up a significant amount of money. I’d like to help you pay for Harvard.”
I’m completely shocked by his offer. I didn’t see it coming, and I don’t know what to say. How can I tell him my surrogate father has offered to pay for everything? How can I take his money when I hardly even know him? It doesn’t feel right. But, on the other hand, how can I let the Hanover’s pay for it all when I could accept help from the man sitting in front of me. Great, more life-changing decisions.
“I appreciate the offer. Let me think about it before I give you an official decision.”
Julio agrees as the waiter brings us our food. We don’t say much as we eat, which I appreciate because my brain is too full as it is. When we finish our meal, we decide to go for a walk and continue our conversation.
“So, do you plan to return to Chicago after law school?”
“Yes. I love it here and don’t want to be too far from my family.”
“I hope that in time, that will include me.”
I smile at him but don’t say anything in response. It’s looking promising, but I am not going to get my hopes up. I need to take my time getting to know him before I can consider him family. I feel my phone start vibrating in my purse. When I finally sift through its contents, I see Miles is the one calling. Ugh. After our encounter earlier, I can’t believe he has the nerve to call me. I ignore the call and stuff the phone back in my purse.
“What’s going on with you and Miles?”
I look up at Julio in surprise. “Why do you ask that?”
“It seems to me that a man who willingly lets his sisters best friend stay with him to protect her from her estranged father and shows up against her wishes to observe her first coffee with said father has more invested in the situation than just “brotherly concern”.”
I try to shrug it off, but Julio continues to press the issue.
“I saw the look on your face when you ignored his call just now.”
“Look, I’m just not happy with him right now. That’s it.”
He holds his hands up in front of him. “None of my business, I get it.”
My phone is vibrating again, I ignore it. “I’m sorry, I just prefer to keep my business to myself. To be perfectly honest, I don’t trust you yet.”
“That’s fair,” Julio points to my purse as it starts vibrating again. “But, you should probably answer that and see what’s going on.”
I roll my eyes and angrily answer the call. “What do you want Miles?”
“CeCe?”
The voice catches me off guard, it’s not Miles. It’s Landon. Why does he have Miles’ phone?
“Mr. Jenkins, what’s going on?”
“It’s Landon. Look, I went out for a few drinks with Miles and now he’s in pretty bad shape. I didn’t want to get Theo involved, so I thought I’d see if you could help me get him home.”
Oh, for fuck’s sake! I close my eyes and take a deep breath in an attempt to calm my temper.
“Where are you?”
I quickly bid farewell to my father without much explanation. I tell him I need to help Miles with a client issue, then call the car service to come get me. Leave it to Miles to go out drinking with his best friend and leave me to clean up the mess. I reach 1000 South Clark about a half hour later. I greet the doorman and he tells me Landon called down ahead and asked them to send me right up. I knock on the apartment door and await an answer.
“Thank you for coming, I really wasn’t sure what to do. I’m not exactly a big drinker, so I’ve never dealt with anyone acting like this.”
“Where is he?”
He leads me through the clean, modern apartment. Miles is sitting in a chair on the balcony, holding a trashcan.
“I’m sorry, you put the super drunk guy on the balcony?”
Landon shrugs and grabs the back of his neck. “I didn’t want him to puke all over my apartment.”
I chuckle. “Well, I need you to brew a pot of strong coffee and find me some bread. If you don’t have b
read, I need you to find me steak, potatoes, anything heavy enough that it will soak up some of the alcohol and sober him up a bit.”
Landon nods and heads to the kitchen as I open the door to the balcony. The smell of vomit is overwhelming and I have to fight to keep my dinner down. When I look at Miles I can see why Landon felt the need to call me. He is covered in his own puke and barely able to keep his eyes open. The only thing that’s troubling me is how he ended up out here in the first place.
