In My Father's Shadow

by JL Paul

  “Go wake the idiots,” Ally smirked, knowing what they were like in the morning and imagining it would be ten times worse after they’d spent the night drinking. Serves them right, though. She wrinkled her brow. “And was I dreaming last night or did they all chirp Cole, telling him how much they loved me?”

  Stephanie laughed as she yanked open the refrigerator and located a carton of orange juice. She poured a glass and took a long drink. “Oh, it was funny. I tried to get them to go upstairs and crash but they insisted on finding you first to tell you they were sorry they got drunk and to tell you they loved you.”

  Ally laughed. “Maybe I should get them drunk more often – maybe they’d appreciate me more.”

  “They appreciate you,” Cole said, handing Ally his spatula. He kissed her cheek. “Guess it just takes alcohol to get them to admit it.” He chucked her under the chin as he dashed out of the kitchen, calling over his shoulder that he’d go wake the others.

  “You four are really close, huh,” Stephanie said when Cole left the room.

  Ally nodded, flipping the sausages onto the plate. “We grew up together. We’ve always been close.”

  “But you and Cole,” she said, thoughtfully. “You’re romantically involved?”

  Ally shrugged. “Just recently. I think it’s always been there but we’ve just ignored it.”

  Stephanie frowned as she opened cabinets, rifling through things until she located a can of coffee. She scooped some out into a coffee filter and filled the pot. She hit the switch and leaned against the counter. “You guys had an argument or something before you came home, didn’t you?” Ally nodded. “Yeah, I knew something was wrong with Cole when he came home the other night and I’d never met him before. I tried to get him to talk but he wouldn’t.”

  “Really,” Ally said, eyes wide.

  Stephanie nodded. “I like him. A lot. And I think he likes me. I think the two of us will be friends, like stepsiblings should be.” She smiled at Ally as she pushed away from the counter to gesture with her hands. “But I never wanted to butt into whatever you had going on with him. Or automatically assume I would be accepted into your circle of friends.”

  Ally hung her head, ashamed of the jealous feelings and mean thoughts she’d had towards the other girl. “I’m really overprotective of the boys. And jealous. I’m sorry if I treated you coldly.”

  “No, Ally, you didn’t,” Stephanie reassured her. “I just wanted to be straight with you from the start, especially since we’ll be seeing a lot of each other. My mom transferred me to your school and I’m to start after Thanksgiving.”

  “I thought she was sending you there after the Christmas holidays?” Ally said, a little confused. “I thought you had to go back to your dad’s house until Winter Break?”

  Stephanie shook her head. “No. Basketball training starts when school resumes and I don’t want to miss it so Mom and Nate said I should just move in during Thanksgiving Break. I play basketball and softball.”

  Ally nodded and turned back to the stove, a strange feeling churning in her stomach.

  Chapter Seventeen

  Thanksgiving evening, Liz knocked on Ally’s bedroom door. They’d had a nice holiday; her grandparents and Ethan and Caroline had been there along with Richie, Callie, Mark, and Gretchen and their kids. All that had been missing was Nate and his family. But Stacy had wanted to do Thanksgiving alone that year. She’d wanted everyone to bond. Ally missed Cole severely, especially after spending the night after the wedding with him. He’d taken her to the movies and out to dinner Monday night but they hadn’t spent any time together since.

  She’d managed to sneak away with RJ and Jamie earlier that evening so they could discuss the big get together Saturday night and figure a way to bring up the rumors again, but it had seemed incomplete since Cole hadn’t been with them. None of them had been able to come up with a single plan to get the adults to talk.

  “Come in,” Ally called, thinking it was Alec. He’d come to her room each night, after she got home, so they could speculate what would happen when they all got together again on Saturday night.

  “I’m surprised you’re home tonight,” Liz smiled as she sat on her daughter’s bed. Ally blushed and sat down next to her, pulling her desk chair to prop her ankle up. “How’s the ankle?”

  “Better,” Ally answered honestly. “Can’t wait to get this stupid cast off, though.”

  “Ally, what’s going on with you and Cole?” Liz asked.

  Ally smiled dreamily “We’re dating. We’ve struggled through this since September and I think we’ve finally figured it out.”

  Liz smiled softly as she gazed lovingly at her daughter. “I always thought you two would end up together.” She stroked her daughter’s hair. “Your dad and I were really good friends before we got together. I was still in high school and it was tough because sometimes I didn’t get to see him for weeks. But every chance I got to see him, I cherished it.”

  “I know you did, Mom,” Ally answered, confused, wondering what her mother was leading up to.

  “Ally, I was very much in love with your dad when I was barely older than you,” she said, studying her feet. “I don’t know that you and Cole are at that point yet, but I don’t think it will be long.”

  “I don’t think we’ve gotten there, yet,” Ally said, her head spinning. “What’s up, Mom?”

  “Well, what I’m trying to say is that I know what it’s like to be totally in love with someone and willing to express that love,” Liz said with a slight blush. “But, honey, we waited. I had this thing about waiting until I was married to have sex and your dad loved me enough to agree.”

  Ally’s cheeks filled with blood as she turned her head, not able to look at her mother. “Mom, we are not having sex.”

  “I didn’t think you were,” Liz clarified. “I’m just saying that I’m not so old that I don’t remember what it’s like to be in love and how easy it is for things to get out of hand.” She paused to take a deep breath. “You and I have talked about this, I know, but you didn’t have a boyfriend then.”

  Ally swallowed back her embarrassment and hugged her mother. “I know, Mom, and I remember everything you said.”

  “I just want to…you know… warn you to be careful,” Liz said. “I’m not saying it’s okay for you and Cole to, you know, have sex, but you’re old enough to make your own decisions. And I trust you to make the right ones. But if you do decide that you want to take that step, you need to take precautions, and I’m not just talking protection. You need to make sure that you are both ready. Sex is a big responsibility, believe it or not.”

  “I don’t think I’m ready,” Ally confessed. “I just don’t think…it’s just not the right time.”

  Liz smiled and stroked Ally’s hair. “Well, I’m glad you’re adult enough to realize that.”

  “I think I love him, Mom,” Ally blurted out, darkness overtaking her face.

  Liz hugged her daughter and brushed the hair out of her face. “Honey, I know you do.”

  “You do?” Ally asked. Liz nodded, still smiling. “So what do I do?”

  Liz laughed gently. “Nothing. Just keep going out with him, spending time together. Get to know each other in the romantic sense. When the time is right, you’ll tell him.”

  “How did you tell Daddy?” she asked.

  Iz’s smile softened as memories took over her mind and made her face morph into a young girl again. She seemed lost down memory lane and Ally had to remind her that they were in the middle of a conversation.

  “Mom,” Ally asked. “How did you tell Dad?”

  Liz blushed and cleared her throat. “I just told him.”

  Ally smirked. “Uh huh. Thanks, I don’t need any details.”

  Iz’s cheeks pinked. “You’re such a bad girl, Allyson! And no, I didn’t tell him in any way you might be thinking.”

  “I’m so glad you did,” Ally said with a huge smile.

  “Me, too,” Liz agreed, hu
gging her daughter close.

  ***

  Out of Control had a gig that Friday night at a local club they frequently played during the summer. Since it was a twenty-one and under club, everyone planned to attend - even the younger kids.

  Ally stood in front of her closet and fretted. Jeana and her family left that morning to head up to Michigan to spend time with Caroline’s side of the family and Ally really wished they hadn’t. She needed Jeana’s expertise desperately.

  She sighed and decided on a denim skirt and a thin, blue sweater. She knew she wouldn’t be dancing but she suspected that with all the bodies pressed together, it would be warm. She left her hair down and just finished applying a touch of makeup, like Jeana had showed her, when her dad yelled for her. She grabbed her crutches and made her way down the stairs.

  When they arrived at the club, she looked everywhere for Cole. She desperately wanted to talk to him as she hadn’t spoken to him in a couple of days. They were all supposed to get together Saturday night and she was hoping her dad would put a stop to all the rumors then. She wanted to speak to Cole and find out how he thought they should proceed. But she couldn’t find him anywhere. All their equipment had been set up but Cole and the other guys were strangely absent.

  “Are you sitting with us, princess?” Jay asked, pulling out a chair. The huge table was nearly full as Richie, Callie, and RJ and Ren’s younger brothers, Ray and Ricky, took up one half.

  “I’m going sit with Jamie if he ever gets here,” she responded, a little morose.

  “There’s a table,” Alec said, pointing out one of the few vacant tables left. Running up to claim it, he imitated his father by pulling a chair out for her.

  She thanked him and sat down, propping her crutches nearby. “Have you seen any of the guys?” she asked.

  “Nope. Not even Nate and Stacy or Aunt Gretchen and Uncle Mark,” he responded.

  A few minutes later, Jamie plopped down next to her while his thirteen year-old brother, Trevor, took the chair next to Alec. “Hey, cuz, where the hell are they?”

  The house lights dimmed as Nate, Stacy, and Stephanie scurried to the tables. Jamie smiled and motioned for Stephanie to join them causing a tiny, jealous knife to jab at Ally’s heart. But as soon as Out of Control was introduced and they started playing, Ally became lost in the music. She couldn’t keep her eyes off Cole, drinking in every inch of him. She recalled the talk she’d had with her mother the night before and felt a blush start at her toes and work its way up to her head.

  As people started crowding the dance floor, Ally was filled with despair because she could not join them. She watched them enviously, wishing she could be out there laughing and moving her body. She silently cursed the clumsy cast on her leg and wished her father would use the hack saw in his garage to saw the stupid thing off and give her freedom.

  “Hey, do you want to dance?” Jamie yelled over the music.

  Ally threw her best menacing glare at him, tempted to pick up a crutch and crash it into his face. “I will punch you.”

  He smirked and tousled her hair. “I was talking to Stephanie, you idiot!”

  “Oh,” Ally said, flustered. She was grateful for the darkness to hide the blush sprawling across her cheeks.

  Stephanie agreed. Ally was forced to sit back and watch as they found a spot and started dancing. She ignored the feeling creeping up her throat and told herself Jamie was just being polite – Stephanie was Cole’s new stepsister, after all. It didn’t matter that Ally always had to come up with some kind of plot to get him on the dance floor. Jamie was only doing it because Cole was one of his best friends.

  She swallowed and smiled at her brother and Trevor.

  “They get better each time I hear them,” Trevor exclaimed. Alec agreed and the two of them put their heads together as RJ’s brother, Ray, scurried to the table to join them.

  “I’ll be right back,” she shouted to the boys. “Bathroom.”

  Cole’s heart wrenched as Ally gazed longingly at the dance floor through the first couple of songs. He wished he could do something but he couldn’t very well stop playing just to dance with her, even if her leg wasn’t broken.

  She did look good tonight, he thought and when she got up, presumably to go to the bathroom, he noticed the skirt she was wearing and nearly missed a beat. He hoped Jamie wouldn’t be too distracted by Stephanie that he’d forget to keep an eye on Ally. He didn’t want anyone hitting on her just because she was sitting with a bunch of young teens.

  They finished up the song and he checked the set list at his feet. They’d already completed a few cover songs and were about to jump into the original stuff he’d written with RJ months ago. He was a little nervous - his dad and the other guys from the band were out there listening - but he was pretty confident in his writing skills.

  They’d started in on a slow number they’d just taught Parker when Ally hobbled back to the table. He watched as other couples made their way to the dance floor and Ally sat at her table with her brother, her cousin, and RJ’s little brother.

  When they finished their first set, Cole jumped off the stage; gratefully taking the towel RJ threw at him, and headed to the back. His dad, as well as the other guys, congratulated the boys enthusiastically. He listened to their praise for a few minutes as he guzzled a bottle of water then moved away and dropped into the chair next to Ally.

  He draped his arm around the back of her chair and kissed her cheek. “What’d ya think?”

  “Not bad,” she shrugged. “I think you missed a beat a couple times.”

  He rolled his eyes, a smirk toying with his lips. “I doubt that, princess.”

  She narrowed her eyes. “Don’t call me that.”

  His smirk encompassed his face as he moved closer. “You look so hot when you get all mad.”

  She pulled back and blinked a couple times. “Huh?”

  He winked at her and dropped a kiss on the top of her head. “I’m going to go get some water. Want some?” He got up and ran off to the bar.

  “Please tell me you two aren’t fighting again,” Jamie whined as he took the chair Cole had just vacated.

  “I don’t know what we are,” Ally sighed. “He totally infuriates me sometimes.”

  Jamie laughed. “You think you don’t infuriate him?”

  Cole placed a water bottle on the table in front of her before she could answer. He bent over and kissed her cheek. “Got to go, princess. See ya after the show.”

  They played on and Jamie pretty much kept her company for the rest of the evening. Stephanie sat with them most of the time when she wasn’t dragging Jamie out to dance. Ally tolerated it only because she didn’t want to cause a scene and upset Nate or Cole, but it was a struggle.

  When their last set ended, a mass of girls flocked the stage, hounding them all for autographs and phone numbers. Finally, they managed to push their way through the crowd to join their families at the back of the club. Ally remained in her chair, not wanting to struggle through all the people. She cursed her cast for the hundredth time that night and waited patiently for things to settle down.

  A DJ started playing and the guys hurried to take down their equipment. Ally watched once more as Stephanie jumped up to help Cole take apart his drum kit. Deep down she knew Stephanie was just being nice, but it still got to her that she was treading on Ally’s ground. How many times had Ally hopped up on that stage and helped Cole with his drums or the other guys with the sound equipment?

  “You okay, princess?” Jay asked her, watching her intently.

  She nodded and smiled. “Yeah, Dad, why?”

  “You look a little ill,” he said with a smile.

  “Nope, I’m fine,” she reassured him with a fake smile plastered on her face. “Just hate having to use these stupid crutches.”

  “They’ll be gone by Christmas,” he said, kissing the top of her head. “Besides, you need to baby that ankle for awhile if you want it to be strong enough to make the State Softball te
am. You coming home with your mom and me or staying with the guys?”

  Startled, Ally looked around and tried to locate one of the boys, but once again, they were absent. “I guess I’m staying here,” she said. “Is Alec staying?”

  “He left with Trevor, Mark, and Gretchen. He’s spending the night there.” Jay kissed her cheek. “Be careful, princess. I’ll see you later.”

  RJ, Ren, and Parker reappeared, laughing as they helped themselves to the cold water bottles a waitress offered. Cole was nowhere to be found.

  She hobbled over to RJ and Parker. “Where is everyone?”

  Parker smiled at her. “They just took the last load of stuff out to the truck. They’ll be back.” He pointed at an empty chair. “Have a seat.

  She sat down and waited for Cole. She fiddled with her warm water bottle as she listened to RJ and Parker discuss their performance. Finally, Cole reappeared with Jamie and Stephanie.

  “Hey,” Cole said, looking surprised, as he sat next to her. “I thought you left with your parents.”

  She shook her head, confused. “Why would you think that?”

  He shrugged. “Well, since you can’t dance, I didn’t think you’d want to stay.”

  “Do you plan on dancing?” she asked, a little more bitterness in her words than she’d intended. Her confusion exploded and she wondered what would make him think she’d leave. How many times had they played at this club and she’d stuck around? Did he not remember those times?

  “No,” he said slowly, taken back by the tone of her voice. “Probably not. Don’t be mad, Al. All I said was that I didn’t think you were staying.”

  “Did you think to ask me?” she asked, chest tightening as she realized how much his easy dismissal of her hurt. She sucked in a deep breath to keep the tears at bay. She hated being a crybaby but it seemed as if it didn’t take much to start the waterworks.

  He ran a hand through his hair and draped his other arm over the back of her chair. “No, I didn’t. Damn. I told you I’m lousy at this stuff, Al.”

  Before she could respond, Stephanie grabbed Cole’s arm excitedly. “I love this song! Come on! You have to dance!”