by Sharon Booth
Even so, the lion's share of the work fell on Eliot, especially as she and Jed were having to split their time between helping on the farm and getting the bunk barns ready, so she was grateful whenever anyone offered to take a turn with the night shift. Adey had done a few, and even Mickey had done a couple, but Eliot didn't like to put on Mickey at his age, and nine times out of ten he ended up staying in the barn with him, as much to keep an eye on the old shepherd as the ewes.
To make matters worse, the brief interlude of sunshine had ended, and mid-April was bitterly cold. When Eliot got back from his final tour of the farm each night, he was freezing. Eden often wondered how anyone could work so hard, in such difficult conditions, and earn such little reward. If there was any justice in the world, Fleetsthorpe would be so financially secure that the bunk barns would never have been necessary. This, however, was the real world, and they needed the extra income. It would soon be May. In less than three weeks, the first guests would be arriving to stay. Eden felt exhausted just thinking about it.
'Are you gonna wake him up to eat?' Jed asked, sipping his tea as he watched the sleeping Eliot.
'No. Let him sleep while he can. I'll warm his tea up for him when he wakes up.' She yawned. 'So much for starting our cream tea business up early.'
'You've had enough to do,' he told her.
'Yeah, you could say that. Stupid idea. I should have thought, with the lambing season, that Easter was out of the question. I suppose I was desperate to start bringing some money back in, rather than paying it out.'
'The barns will pay their way,' he assured her, hearing the worry in her voice. 'You'll see. You know what? You look beat, too. You've never stopped these last few weeks. Get an early night, okay?'
'I will. I don't know if I'm coming or going these days.' She slumped in the chair. 'Thanks, Jed. Oh, did I tell you, Beth's coming round later? She rang up to ask after Tiggy, and she offered to sit with you in the barn for a couple of hours later. She's smitten with the lambs and she's desperate to see one being born. Would you mind?'
Jed's face was neutral, so she wasn't sure whether he minded or not, but his voice sounded pleasant enough. 'Sure, why not? Doesn't her husband mind her being out this evening?'
'No idea,' she said. 'I never ask about him. It's safest to avoid the subject of James Fuller at all costs.'
'Why does everyone hate the guy so much?' Jed murmured, clearly aware that the children were sitting in front of the television and might well be listening in.
Whether they were or not, Eden had no intention of revealing family secrets to Jed, as nice as he was. 'Oh, he's not a kind man,' she said with a shrug. 'Sly, manipulative, selfish. Beth deserves better. I suppose that's what makes it worse. She's such a lovely person, don't you think?'
Jed drained his mug. 'Yeah, I guess. She seems okay to me, anyway.'
'Oh, she is, Jed. I hope she gets to see a lamb born tonight. It will cheer her up. Although —' She broke off and Jed peered at her curiously.
'Although what?'
'Nothing. Forget it.' She'd been about to say that witnessing any birth might be a painful reminder to Beth of her own sad situation, but that was none of Jed's business. He didn't need to know anything about their friend's personal life, after all.
****
'Five lambs and no problems,' Jed said, with obvious satisfaction. 'That's what I call a result.'
He looked at Beth, whose eyes were still shining with excitement as she watched the latest arrivals staggering around on dainty legs. Within minutes they were suckling at their mothers. Two sets of twins and a single lamb — four of them female. It was the most moving thing they'd ever seen.
'I'll have to go,' she said, glancing at her watch and pulling a face. 'He thought I was mad when I said I wanted to be here to watch the lambing for a couple of hours. He'll be even more suspicious if I stay longer.'
'Suspicious?' Jed felt a mixture of hope and anxiety at the thought. 'He's suspicious of us?'
She shook her head. 'Not us, no. I don't think he's even remembered you're staying here. No, it's Eliot. He's convinced I have a thing for him.'
Jed leaned back against the wall of the lambing shed and folded his arms, surveying her in amusement. 'Really? Wow, you kept that quiet. And do you?'
She laughed. 'Of course not! Eliot's my friend. If anything, I see him more as a brother than a lover. I don't think of him in that way. I never have, as fond as I am of him.'
'His accent's not as sexy as mine anyway,' Jed drawled.
'That's debatable actually,' Beth said, wrinkling her nose as she pretended to give the matter some serious consideration. 'The Yorkshire accent is rather earthy and manly, if you ask me.'
'That's outrageous,' Jed said. 'You can't say you don't find my accent just as manly!'
'Between you and me,' she teased, 'neither of you can hold a candle to an Irishman. Now that's an accent!'
Jed knew he was beaten. He'd never met a woman yet who didn't love an Irish accent. 'Okay, fair enough,' he said. 'But I claim second place and that's final.'
She laughed and shuffled over to sit beside him. 'I've enjoyed this last couple of hours,' she said. 'Being with you, all alone like this. I wish I didn't have to go home.'
'I wish it, too,' he said softly. 'I miss you. I was so glad when Eden said you were coming over tonight. I'd been kinda worried I'd scared you off.'
'Scared me off?'
'When I kissed you like that. Bit intense for a first kiss, huh?'
'Not at all,' she breathed. 'It was perfect.'
'Beth —' he hesitated, not wanting to pressure her in any way, 'it meant a lot to me. I mean, I wasn't just saying it at the time. You mean a lot to me. I don't know what it is about you, but it feels right, you know?'
'I know. I feel the same.'
'I wasn't sure. You don't strike me as the kind of girl who makes a habit of this.'
'Never! I've never so much as looked at another man since I met James. I've been hurt so badly by infidelity that I never thought, not for one moment, that I'd be contemplating it myself.'
'Contemplating it?' He reached out a hand and found hers waiting. Their palms pressed together, and she looked down at them, clearly trying to formulate what she wanted to say.
'In my mind, I suppose that kiss was cheating,' she admitted. 'It was hardly innocent, was it? I mean, there was an awful lot of feeling in it — on my part anyway.'
'And mine,' he assured her. 'Beth, I don't want to push you into doing anything you don't want to do —'
'But I want to!' she burst out. 'I know that sounds awful, and I'm so ashamed of myself, and I feel so guilty for James, but it's all I can think about. I want to be with you, Jed. Really be with you. I'm sorry. I must sound shameless.'
'Beth, I've been driving myself crazy wanting you,' he murmured. 'If you're shameless, then so am I, but I don't feel like it. This isn't some passing attraction, is it? This is real. You can feel it, can't you?'
'Yes,' she admitted. 'And it scares me to death. I've never felt like this about anyone before — anyone. I've been trying to tell myself it's lust and it will pass, but somehow, it was like I was meant to meet you. Right from the first moment I saw you on the doorstep of the farmhouse, I knew. I — I can't stop thinking about you, Jed.'
He pulled her onto his lap and wrapped his arms around her waist. She stared into his eyes, as if desperately trying to communicate to him all the things she longed to tell him. Gently, hesitantly, their faces moved ever closer, until his lips crushed hers and everything else was forgotten.
'I want you so bad,' Jed gasped, 'but this isn't the time or place. It's not right.'
'I don't care,' she begged. 'Honestly, I don't.'
It took every ounce of self-control he possessed to pull away from her. 'You deserve better than the floor of a lambing shed,' he told her. 'Besides,' he added with a wry smile, 'we don't wanna startle the sheep and set them all off in labour.'
Beth's chest was heaving, and he
forced himself to look away before he did something totally irresponsible and selfish.
'I'll think of something,' he told her. 'I promise.'
Beth took his hand and placed it on her breast, leaving him powerless to resist. 'There's an old stone barn just beyond Barton's Copse,' she told him between kisses. 'It's never used these days, but it's safe and out of the way. Meet me there tomorrow?'
'A barn?' Jed wanted to be strong. He wanted their first time to be perfect. An old barn hardly seemed the most romantic place. But every cell in his body seemed to be screaming for union with hers, and he knew he couldn't say no. In any case, he would make it perfect wherever they were. How could it not be? They were meant to be together, after all. He gasped as her tongue flicked his and knew he was lost.
A few minutes later, she scrambled to her feet and brushed straw from her clothes. 'Tomorrow morning? What time?'
Jed thought fast. He would be up until around six when Eliot took over. He'd hurry back to the house, have a quick shower and a change of clothes then head out again. They would all assume he was in bed, anyway. 'About seven?' he said doubtfully, not sure she'd be awake at that time, or if she could even sneak away.
'I'll be there at quarter to,' she promised, smiling.
Then she was gone, and Jed fell back against the wall feeling dazed. There was a lot more to Beth than the quiet, demure, rather shy woman he'd first met, that was for sure. A hell of a lot more. He couldn't wait to find out what other surprises she had in store.
MAY
Chapter Twenty-Two
Cain loaded his suitcase into the boot of his hire car. Since he was incognito, he'd left his beloved Rolls Royce at home and taken the precaution of driving to Skimmerdale in a run-of-the-mill saloon. Waste of time, really, and he'd known it when he made the arrangements. He was an idiot.
He slammed the boot shut and climbed into the car, feeling the gloom settling on him. Well, what did you expect? No fool like an old fool, he thought bitterly. It was stupid to even hope that he'd bump into Constance again, yet he hadn't been able to help himself.
Ever since that crazy evening with her, he'd not stopped thinking about her. If only he'd had the foresight to get her number. Even her surname would have helped. As it was, he had no idea where she lived and no way of contacting her. Yet, like the old fool that he was, he'd found himself heading up to the Dales again, without even telling anyone he was coming, and hiding away at The Paradise Hotel in the vain hope that Constance would have returned, too.
It was stupid of him, and he knew it. She'd only been in Yorkshire for business and there was nothing to suggest she would be returning any time soon — if ever. Even if she did, Yorkshire was a big county. She could be staying anywhere. It was highly unlikely that she'd be at The Paradise Hotel on the very day that he booked in, now was it? Even so, Cain had spent the last two nights in the restaurant, lingering over food he had no appetite for, scanning the bar hopefully for a glimpse of an elegant brunette with almond eyes and legs to die for.
Now he'd finally accepted that it was a waste of time, so he'd checked out and was heading home. He didn't even intend to call at Fleetsthorpe. He wasn't in the mood for more of Emerald's moaning. He wanted to go home and pretend he'd never met Constance. If he could only get her out of his brain, that is.
Driving out of the gates, Cain headed down the lane that led to Kirkby Skimmer town centre, cursing as he realised that it was market day and the town was unusually busy. The streets were packed with parked cars, since the market had taken over the square where people usually parked. He steered the hire car at a crawling pace down a narrow, cobbled lane, keeping an eye out for anyone stepping out from between the parked cars that lined both sides of the lane. He had no patience for this and blasted his horn as a car door opened and a driver stepped out onto the road, a few cars ahead of him.
His mouth fell open as the driver turned to look at him, and his heart began to drum frantically. Without even glancing in the rear-view mirror to see if there was anything behind him, Cain turned off his engine and leapt out of his car.
'Connie!'
It was a stupid thing to do, he realised afterwards. She could have been with someone — maybe even the husband he was convinced she had, given the ring on her finger. How would they have explained that?
Luckily for him, fate seemed to be on his side. She was alone, and to his relief, her face lit up at the sight of him. 'Jeff, darling!'
He felt stupidly delighted to be called darling, even though he was aware that posh birds like her used the term willy-nilly. Everyone was a darling as far they were concerned—well, to their faces anyway. He remembered Freya air kissing people, almost on a daily basis, and gushing, 'Darling, how lovely to see you!' then muttering to Cain that she hated them and hoped they'd get run over by a steam roller on their way home. Even so, the sparkle in Connie's eyes told him she was genuinely pleased to see him, and he could hardly wipe the smile off his own face.
She tottered towards him, and he realised she was wearing black knee-high boots with a four-inch heel, at least. She was still half a head shorter than him, and he had a sudden crazy urge to protect her. Protect her from what? She probably had a much better life than he did, for Christ's sake. 'What on earth are you doing here?'
Cain realised he was blushing — a most unfamiliar sensation. 'Er, had to nip back on business. What about you?'
'Oh, me, too. What a coincidence.' She bit her lip. 'So, er, are you staying at The Paradise?'
'I just checked out,' he admitted, suddenly cursing his impetuous decision to give up so soon. 'Are you booked in there?'
'Er, no. A little guest house a few miles away. What a shame. We could have had a drink together or something.'
The implication hung in the air. Cain swallowed. 'Are you busy then?'
Connie glanced around and shrugged. 'I was killing time before heading home. Business concluded so I thought I'd do some shopping for an hour or two.'
'Oh, right. Well.'
They stared at each other, and Cain saw the gleam of desire in Connie's eyes. It lit a fire deep within his belly. Sod it, it was worth a shot. She could only say no, after all.
'I don't suppose — I mean, I could always book a room for one more night?'
She raised an eyebrow. 'You could?'
'I could, if I needed to. I mean, we could spend the afternoon there. What do you think?'
She eyed him steadily. 'I'm married, Jeff.'
Cain's heart sank. 'I know. Sorry. Like you said, it was a one-off.'
Connie hesitated. 'I suppose — that is, what he doesn't know won't hurt him.'
Cain's heart lifted. 'Well, exactly.'
'I want to make it quite clear that I don't normally do this sort of thing. You're the first. I've never cheated on my husband before.'
'I believe you, Connie. You're a lady. Anyone can tell that.'
'And it's strictly no-strings? No expectations, no demands. Just sex?'
Cain shivered in anticipation. Was he dreaming? This was the perfect scenario. 'Absolutely. Just sex.'
She smiled softly. 'It was rather good, wasn't it?'
'You're not wrong there, Connie. I'd forgotten I could enjoy meself like that, truth to tell, and we seemed to — you know — gel. Right?'
'Oh, we did,' she murmured. She winked at him and turned towards her car. 'I'll follow you to the hotel,' she called over her shoulder. 'Go and get that room booked!'
Cain almost fell back into his car. Life was suddenly looking very promising indeed.
****
James found his mother sitting in the snug. Why she persisted in using that room during the summer months he had no idea. She was the only person who ever used that room outside of deepest winter. Anyone would think she liked being alone.
She was sitting in one of the huge, winged armchairs, curled up with a glass of wine, staring into space. She seemed rather annoyed by his arrival which wasn't a good start. Great. Just what he needed. His sto
mach lurched with anxiety as he geared himself up to tackle the knotty subject of his illegitimate son. Evidently, his distress was apparent in his face.
'What is it?' She leaned towards him, showing an unusual concern for his wellbeing.
He swallowed, trying to gather his courage. 'I — I need to talk to you. To tell you something.'
'Oh?'
'Some time ago — years, actually — I did something I'm not particularly proud of.'
His mother picked up her glass of wine again and took a sip, eyeing him suspiciously. 'Really? You intrigue me.'
James licked his lips. 'I made the mistake of getting involved with another woman.'
Deborah arched an eyebrow. 'You mean you had an affair?'
He flinched. 'I hate that word.'
She smiled at him. 'Oh, I am sorry. What would you prefer me to call it?'
Was she being sarcastic? 'Well, I'd call it a big mistake, personally. It was with a local woman, Jemima. She was rather beautiful, and so charming. She was from a good family, but she made the mistake of trapping herself in a loveless marriage with a man who didn't understand her.'
Deborah tutted. 'Poor thing. Thank goodness you came along.'
'Er, quite.' James eyed her nervously. 'Anyway, the thing is, the relationship continued for over a year and only ended when — well, she was killed, rather tragically in a car crash.'
He watched as she took a gulp of her wine. The silence seemed to stretch on forever. Eventually, she said, 'Why are you telling me this, James?'
'Because —' He glanced around the snug, as if someone was hiding in a corner, spying on him. 'Because the relationship resulted in the birth of a child. A boy. My son.'
