All In

by Amy DeMeritt

  Ashton lines a file box with a blanket and sets Ember down inside on the floor by her filing cabinet. Ember meows and paws at the blanket to get back into Ashton’s hands, which jerks at her heart. But the sound of Erin unzipping her jeans is enough to make her stand and walk away from the kitten.

  As Ashton steps between her thighs, Erin grabs the front of Ashton’s tee shirt and pulls her down into a kiss. With their lips and tongues tangling together, lashing out to stoke the flames of their arousal, Ashton bunches Erin’s tee shirt up to her armpits. Erin pulls her arms free and releases Ashton’s mouth long enough for her to pull her shirt off. As their mouths lock together again, Ashton lowers Erin to lay on her desk, which Erin cleared off while Ashton was setting Ember down.

  The sound of laughing and talking slowly creeps by her office, causing both of them to freeze. They meet each other’s eyes and smile with reckless abandon flashing in their pupils. Ashton trails fast nipping kisses down the side of Erin’s neck and down to her right breast. She sucks the upper portion of the creamy globe, sucking hard enough that she tastes iron in the smooth skin, which causes Erin to release a barely contained gasping moan and grip the back of Ashton’s head. Ashton grins as she releases the flesh. She licks the round red mark, then tugs the bra cup off of her breast to envelop her nipple.

  “Fuck, I love your mouth.”

  “You love more than my mouth and you know it.”

  Erin releases a laughing moan and inhales deeply as Ashton starts kissing her athletically trim stomach. “I love all of you, baby. Oh, fuck, I missed this – being taken by you on your desk in the middle of the firehouse.”

  “Lift your hips, DeLuna.”

  Erin groans in pleasure as she pushes up so Ashton can pull her jeans and panties off of her hips. Ashton grabs the heels of her sneakers to tug them off, then pulls her jeans and panties off completely. She lifts Erin’s legs to rest her heels on the edge of the desk, spreading her wide with her knees pointed to the ceiling.

  As she leans over Erin’s beautiful, slightly quivering body, she palms her hand down over her patch of short light brown hairs. With her lips hovering above Erin’s parted lips and while looking into her beautiful green eyes, she slips two fingers over her clit. Erin’s eyes close and her body arches up as she quietly groans.

  Ashton grins against Erin’s mouth, and as she pushes two fingers inside of her, she thrusts her tongue forward, catching her groan of pleasure in her own throat. While their lips and tongues fervently clash together, Ashton massages her breast and pumps her fingers in and out of her, firmly riding over her G-spot. She twists and flicks her fingers, engaging as many nerves as possible and sending rushes of arousal pouring out of her. She teasingly glides her thumb around her labia and clit, causing her body to buck and spasm underneath her.

  Erin’s body suddenly tenses and her head tilts back. Ashton places a hand over her mouth to muffle her sounds of pleasure as she begins to shudder from her intense orgasm. After several moments, Erin grabs Ashton’s wrist and pulls her hand out from between her thighs. Ashton removes her other hand from Erin’s mouth and gives her a light kiss on her panting lips.

  “Fuck, that was good. Pull me up, baby.”

  Ashton pulls her up to a sitting position and Erin wraps her arms and legs around her to lay on her chest.

  “Ash, I was so worried about you yesterday. Our truck pulled up just in time to see you walking into that inferno. And I just couldn’t, for the life of me, understand why you were going in. Someone told us there were reports of people being inside, but I just couldn’t believe you’d actually get lucky enough that someone would be in that tiny space that hadn’t been consumed yet. Then when you just stood there with that ring of fire getting closer and closer to you, my heart felt like it stopped. When you walked back inside, I thought I was going to die. You didn’t have your jacket on and you had no backup with you. If something happened, no one was in there with you. I thought… I thought I was never going to see you again. When you jumped out of there, it was like the world quickly started spinning again. Ash, I don’t know why we don’t work as a couple, but I hope you know I love you, like really love you. I’m not just sitting on your desk for the sex.”

  “I know, babe. I love you too. You really think I’d risk my career just for a good lay?”

  Erin releases a small laugh as she lifts her head to look up into Ashton’s light gray eyes. “Please, you were risking that only a few weeks after we met. Don’t act like this is signif…”

  Ashton presses her lips against Erin’s, cutting her off and engaging her in a fervent kiss. Erin inhales deeply and grips Ashton’s shoulders, pulling them in tighter together.

  After a few minutes, they pull apart to catch their breath, and Ashton says, “Just for the record, every time with you is significant. We may not be a couple, but it doesn’t cheapen what we have.”

  “Why aren’t we a couple?”

  “Because you broke up with me. Three times. Are you changing your mind? Again.”

  Erin inhales deeply as she leans back slightly on her hands and tilts her head to look at Ashton. She smiles as she scans her eyes over her – admiring her sharply styled short gray hair, strong sharp jaw, piercing gray eyes, short pointed-nose, pouty red lips, and her smooth olive skin. Ashton has strong, broad shoulders, small pert breasts, defined biceps and triceps, and if her shirt was off, Erin would get to drool over her lightly defined six-pack abs. Ashton is built like a Greek warrior goddess and every inch of her turns Erin on. Even her oval ears are attractive to Erin.

  “You are so fucking sexy. Like, the kind of sexy that you don’t even know you dream about till you see it, then you can never un-see it and you compare every other preconceived notion of sexiness to it.” She inhales deeply again as the nerves between her thighs start firing off desperate signals to her brain, begging her to pull Ashton back down on top of her again. “Ash, what went wrong with us?”

  “I don’t know.” Ashton shakes her head and give her a soft kiss on the lips for a few moments. “We get along. We have fun together. We love each other. We trust each other with our lives. The last time we broke up, you said we just weren’t enough for each other. What am I missing that you need?”

  “What am I missing that you need?”

  Ashton groans as she lightly bites Erin’s neck. “It doesn’t help us figure anything out if neither of us will actually talk about it.” She bends down to grab Erin’s panties and pants. “You should get dressed before someone comes knocking on the door and you’re caught in here without them on.”

  “Are you dismissing me?”

  “No, but we’ll probably be able to talk with clearer minds if you cover all of that up. You’re too fucking hot.”

  Erin grins as she allows Ashton to slide her pants and panties over her feet and up her legs. “So, you still think I’m hot?”

  “Five-alarm kind of hot, babe.”

  “Good. Now, tell me why you love Gloria more than me?”

  Ashton freezes at her knees and looks up at her confused. “What?”

  “You love Gloria more than anyone else, yet you’re not fucking and never have. What does she have that I don’t have and no other woman has had? Is it just because she’s the one woman you can’t have?”

  “I don’t think about Gloria like that. You know that. We’ve been through this a million times. Lift your hips.” Erin lifts up and Ashton roughly pulls her pants and panties up. “Look, I’m open to talking about us and our future, but I’m seriously tired of beating this dead horse. Gloria and I are just friends, and there is nothing romantic between us and no yearning on either of our parts for there to be something romantic between us. She is not standing between us or me and any other woman.”

  “Then what is standing between us? What is the big invisible wall you throw up that keeps us from getting as close as you are to Gloria?”

  Ashton’s eyes narrow as she bends down to grab Erin’s tee shirt. Instead of helping her int
o it, she drapes it over Erin’s shoulder and walks across her small office to sit on the couch. Erin puts her shirt and shoes on, then joins Ashton, sitting flush against her. She entwines her fingers with Ashton’s and leans over to kiss her cheek.

  “Talk to me.”

  “I have no idea why I love Gloria as much as I do. Honestly, the woman drives me crazy sometimes and she knows it. She’s bossy, loud, talks too much sometimes, and she lays a claim to me she has no right to because she’s not my partner and never has been. But I try not to let our unique friendship get in the way of a real relationship. Did you feel like she was in our way? Is that why you wanted to break it off?”

  “I don’t know.” Erin lays her head on Ashton’s shoulder and wraps an arm around her waist. “I guess part of me is jealous that you love another woman more than me, especially one who has never given you this – the romance, the sex, the passion. I’ve given you all of me, and you still love her more.”

  “But it’s a different kind of love.”

  “It’s still stronger than what you feel for me.”

  “Do you love me enough to say you want to spend forever together? The last time we broke up, you didn’t.”

  “I don’t know, Ash. I want to. You’re perfect for me. Well, aside from the fact that you’re a freaking firefighter and a badass one who leads the way into the worst fires imaginable. Maybe that’s part of the problem. I’m always afraid I’m going to lose you and live the rest of my life heartbroken and alone.”

  “So, you’re holding out for someone who’s just as perfect who doesn’t have such a dangerous job? That’s fine, I get it.”

  An alarm sounds throughout the firehouse, alerting them to a fire in progress, so Ashton and Erin quickly stand up.

  “You’re staying here, DeLuna. I already have a full crew here.”

  “But I can…”

  “You’re staying. Watch after Ember for me.”

  “Ash, I…”

  She gives Erin a brief kiss then rushes to her door. As she’s walking out, she says, “We’re good. We always are.”

  Ashton is out of sight before she can respond, but Erin screams, “I love you,” in hopes she can still hear her.

  Chapter Four

  As Ashton walks into Hendrick’s, the local pub frequented by firefighters and police officers alike, she’s hollered at and waved to by several standing and sitting groups. She returns the waves and calls out greetings on her way to the bar, but she doesn’t stop to chat with anyone. As she sits on a stool, Sheila, one of the bartenders working tonight, walks over with a pint of Ashton’s favorite local pale ale on draft.

  “Good evening, Lieutenant. How you doing?”

  “Thanks, Sheila. I’m very tired.” She takes a gulp of beer, then looks towards the stage, where a five-member folk-rock band is playing a cover of a popular pop song. “They’re not too bad.”

  “At least the masses aren’t tossing fried pickles at them.”

  Ashton laughs a little and nods. It has only happened a couple of times, but the number of fried pickle orders has become the telltale of whether or not the “masses” actually like the live entertainment booked by the manager.

  “Besides the lack of flying fried pickles, how’s your night going?”

  “Pretty good.” She fills a glass of water for herself, then leans forward on her forearms. “What’s on your mind? You look distracted.”

  Ashton shrugs a shoulder as she takes a few more sips of beer and grabs one of the menus from a nearby holder. “Just trying to figure out some things.”

  “Relationship things?”

  She laughs as she rolls her eyes, which makes Sheila’s dark brown cheeks rise with a knowing smile. “Alright, tell me what you want to eat first. Then you tell me which of your many women has your head and heart all twisted up.”

  “Many women? Now who has her head all twisted up? There are only two women in my life. Three, if you count my new kitten.”

  “No, honey, I don’t count the kitten. What do you want to eat?”

  “You should – count the kitten, I mean. Considering she’s probably the only woman who will be living with me and growing old with me.” Ashton gulps back the last of her beer and replaces the menu as she stands up and pulls her wallet out. “Thanks for the beer, Sheila. I’m going to head home. It’s been a very long day.”

  “Wait. Ash, what’s this about?”

  She just gives her a small smile and sets some cash down on the bar for the beer and a tip.

  “Have a good night, Sheila.”

  Sheila stands upright looking concerned, and stumbles to answer, “Yeah, thanks. You too. Drive carefully.”

  Ashton waves a hand behind herself and leaves the bar. She walked here from the firehouse because it’s only a quarter mile away, but as she steps outside, she wishes she had just driven. Her body and mind are completely exhausted and her mood is only making the exhaustion worse.

  It’s been a week since Erin brought up the discussion of their relationship and the reasons they can’t work as a couple. They’ve talked a few times since, and it keeps coming back to two things – Gloria and Ashton’s unpredictable mortality. Even though Erin is a volunteer firefighter, she rarely goes into a blaze. Erin operates the water hoses. She stays outside and helps to control and destroy the blaze. Her mortality isn’t as at risk as Ashton’s.

  Ashton has been a firefighter since she turned eighteen. She has been doing this for twenty-two years. She has been through hell on earth more times than she can count and she has considered whether she should stop just as many times. But just as quickly as the thought occurs, it’s immediately crushed by the realization that she is saving lives. Can she really turn her back on that just to be guaranteed a warm body in her bed every night and a loving face to eat breakfast across from?

  As she crosses the station parking lot, her pace slows and she starts shaking her head with a sense of irony lifting some of the weight off of her shoulders. Erin is sitting on the open tailgate of her truck with a duffle bag sitting next to her.

  “I went to your apartment and you weren’t there. I came here and found your truck but not you. Marge said you weren’t out on a call, so I figured aliens abducted you. Where did those perverts drop you after probing you?”

  Ashton stops a few feet in front of her and puts her hands in her pockets. “Cute. I went to Hendrick’s intent on having dinner and a couple of drinks, but I only got one pint down before I realized I’m too exhausted to be social. What are you doing here, DeLuna?”

  “Looking for you.”

  “You could have called or texted me to see if I was really abducted by aliens. Or you could have just met me at Hendrick’s, which would have been the logical explanation for my abandoned truck. Why are you just sitting on my tailgate?”

  “Because I don’t know what to do, Ash.” She slaps the duffle bag with the back of her hand. “I packed an overnight bag and got in my car and drove to your place without even thinking it out. I just showed up on your doorstep and you weren’t even there. I mean, of course not, because you weren’t expecting me. Instead of calling you like a sane person would, I drove to the firehouse to track you down. I’m sitting here because I realized how impetuous I’m being. Who’s to say you even wanted to see me tonight? Yet, here I am, camped out on your truck waiting for you to wrap your arms around me and kiss me. I’m just waiting for you take me home. It’s stupid, right?” Erin starts lightly crying, causing a lump to form in Ashton’s throat. “I’ve been telling you all week I’m afraid of getting serious with you because I’m afraid I’ll lose you to Gloria or to a damn fire, yet I’m here. I’m sitting on your damn truck waiting for you to ignore everything I’ve said and to just take me home with you.”

  Ashton steps forward and picks up Erin’s duffle bag and takes her hand. “Come on, babe. Let’s go home.”

  Erin hops down off of the tailgate and pushes it up to lock in place, then throws her arms around Ashton. She kisses the side o
f Ashton’s neck and Ashton bends down to give her what she really wants – a tender, loving kiss.

  After helping her into the front passenger seat and setting her bag on the back bench, Ashton walks around to her side feeling even more confused than before, yet slightly hopeful.

  As she backs out of the parking space, she says, “I’ll bring you back to pick up your car in the morning.”

  “I’m off tomorrow so it’s no rush.”

  “Even better. That means we can sleep in. After today, I swear I could sleep for a week straight.”

  “You have a lot of calls today?”

  “Three false alarms at office buildings, a grease fire at a Toni’s Tacos, a car fire at Lambert’s Auto Repair, and a backyard barbeque that burned the garage down.”

  Erin whistles and leans across the center console to kiss her cheek. “That sounds like a very long day. What were they barbequing? How did it get out of control?”

  “You hear of beer-can chicken before?”

  “Yeah, you stick an open can of beer into the cavity of the chicken and roast it standing up. We’ve done those plenty of times at the firehouse. There’s no way that caused the garage to burn down.”

  “If they had stuck to the correct way of doing it, they would have been fine. They had a genius plan though – their own words.”

  Erin laughs, saying, “Oh, this sounds good.”

  Ashton groans and shakes her head. As she parks outside of her apartment, she turns to look at Erin. “These geniuses stuck a bottle of tequila up the chicken.”

  Erin bursts with laughter then quickly clears her throat, saying, “Sorry, that’s not funny. I know that’s so dangerous. What happened?”

  “You know that flabby neck skin butchers sometimes leave to cover the hole where the neck was? Well, it fell into the neck of the bottle. The outside skin became dry because the barbeque heat was too high and the skin essentially acted like a rag. The skin caught fire, funneled into the bottle, and boom. They had a tequila-chicken bomb. They’re lucky all of them were inside prepping other food when it exploded. It took out the garage and part of the fence. There was debris all over their backyard and the neighbor’s yard. They really could have killed themselves and their neighbors if anyone had been outside.”