This Time, Forever

by Pamela Britton

  She didn’t want to find out.

  “Then I guess I’ll have to pick the right man,” she said absently.

  She had a feeling her brother knew something was afoot. Intelligent, highly educated, he didn’t get to the top of the NASCAR game by being stupid. So she wasn’t surprised when he came forward, rested his hands against the front of her desk. “If you have someone in mind,” he said, “be careful, little sis. Some guys might want to use you to get close to me.”

  She drew back in surprise. Was that what Linc was doing? Was he using her to solidify his place at Double S Racing?

  No.

  That was ridiculous.

  “You know how it is,” he said. “Some men will do whatever they can to get to the top and so I’ll be honest. If you dated someone within the NASCAR industry, it’d have to be someone pretty high up. Someone already well established.”

  Marley gulped. She didn’t live with her head in the sand by any means. She was trying to be realistic where Linc was concerned, but she just didn’t see him as the type that would use her. Not like that. Maybe that was naive, but she’d like to think she was a good judge of character.

  “Well then, you’ll be relieved to know you have nothing to worry about.” She almost added that she wasn’t dating a driver, but she couldn’t be that dishonest. “I duly promise to date only men at the top of the heap.”

  Still, Gil looked at her suspiciously. “Your choice,” he said.

  And it was. She just hoped it was the right choice.

  A WEEK PASSED. Marley secretly accompanied Linc to yet another race, this one in Charlotte, and to be honest, she was getting a little tired of it all. She lived in fear that she’d bump into Gil. If things worked out between her and Linc, she wanted to be the one to tell Gil. She didn’t want him to get the news second hand. And God help her if her mother popped in for a visit.

  But she had bigger fish to fry. Linc was in a slump.

  Hard to imagine calling a man a failure after only three races, but that’s exactly what the media did. They claimed he was washed up. That he had no business being back in a race car. That he should hang up his steering wheel and maybe try car ownership instead.

  “I feel like doing exactly that,” Linc said, despondent, his face in deep shadows. It was near midnight, as the mid-autumn race held had been at night. They stood just outside his motor home. Beneath giant klieg lights, Marley could see that the grandstands were slowly emptying of race fans. It was a local race and so at least Marley was close to home.

  “Linc,” she said softly, glancing around to ensure her brother wasn’t walking up to them. Even at this time of night, the Drivers’ and Owners’ parking lot was well lit.

  “Give it time. You know how it is with a new team.”

  “Yeah, but these days owners expect results right away.”

  That was true, she thought, glancing around. The parking area was a city unto itself. Even though the race was close to home, most of the drivers and their crew members kept motor homes nearby, as places where they could rest and relax away from the garage throughout the weekend. Buses and recreational vehicles covered every square inch of the blacktop. She and Linc were relatively excluded. Still…her brother could appear at any moment. He’d even parked his car near Linc’s motor home.

  “Gil’s not like that,” Marley said, growing more and more tense by the minute. She’d followed Linc back from the garage, but she knew time was short. The haulers would begin pulling out at any moment. Beyond the Drivers’ and Owners’ lot, she could hear a stream of cars and recreational vehicles leaving the track.

  “I sure hope not,” he said, staring off into the distance.

  And Marley’s heart broke for him. She could see such a mix of emotion on his face. Sadness. Resignation. Fear.

  “Linc, it’s okay,” she said, reaching out and placing a hand on his arm. Damn it. She wanted to slip into his arms, to ease the ache in his eyes. But she couldn’t. Not here. “Just focus on next week.”

  He nodded. “But that would be easier to do…with you by my side.”

  “I am by your side,” she said.

  “Not like I want you to be.”

  She knew what he meant, glanced around to make sure they were alone before stepping closer. More than a few people were returning from the garage. A few buses down, one of the diesel engines revved to life. Before long, team members would start to roll out, some in regular vehicles, others in their motor home. They didn’t have much time.

  “Give it a few weeks,” Marley said. A few weeks for her to decide if this would all shake out. “Talk to Gil tomorrow. Explain how hard you’re trying. I’m sure he’ll understand.”

  He nodded, looked off into the distance. She knew he was thinking about the race he’d just run. He’d finished thirty-ninth. Awful…especially for a man used to being on top, it was hell to find himself at the bottom of the score board.

  “I just hate to think he might believe I’ve lost my touch.”

  And this was the hard part of the business, the part most magazines and e-zines didn’t talk about. How demoralizing it was to the drivers who weren’t performing well. How even the most talented driver could be reduced to an insecure mess. But most of all, how a driver would beat himself up when he wasn’t driving up to an owner’s standards. Linc’s situation was complicated by that plane crash. The tragic accident had taken more than the lives of his friends.

  “Look,” she said, scooting as close to him as she dared. “No driver is fired less than a month after being hired. You know that and I know that. Don’t stress. My brother’s not going to let you go just because of a few bad finishes. I won’t let him.”

  His eyes never left hers. She saw him shift, felt his hand caress the side of her cheek. “Thank God I have you.”

  She leaned her face into him. “See what happens when you get me drunk?”

  “You weren’t drunk,” he said with a laugh. Marley was glad to hear it. “You were tipsy.”

  She smiled. “Ah, yes, tipsy,” she said, wishing he would go on touching her all night. But it was already late, and she had an early morning meeting. As much as she’d love to spend the night in his arms, it wasn’t feasible.

  “I better get going,” she said.

  “Not yet,” he replied softly.

  She knew what he was going to do before he did it; she could see the intent in his eyes. And just seeing that spark, knowing that was sexual interest that simmered in his eyes—it caused her own body to ignite. So she didn’t draw away. She would be a fool to do so. Somehow, remarkably, she’d managed to capture the attention of this amazing man. If she were honest with herself, there was a part of her that wanted the world to know it.

  Her eyes closed of their own volition. She could feel every soft curve of his lips, the pressure of his mouth increasing with every second that passed. She knew what he wanted, resisted opening her mouth. If she did that, she’d lose all sense of reason. She couldn’t allow that to happen, not with Gil so close—

  His tongue swiped her lower lip.

  She moaned. He took advantage of her slightly open mouth. His tongue was warm, and he tasted of coffee and mints. She touched him back, lifted her hands to his chest, not to push him away, but to feel the beat of his heart beneath his shirt. She loved kissing him. Loved touching him even more. There was a part of her—even now—that still couldn’t believe she was with Linc Shepherd. And so what would it hurt if she let him kiss her for a minute…just a minute—

  “What in the hell are you doing?”

  They both drew apart, and it didn’t take bright lights to see that her brother was stunned to find her in Linc’s arms. Worse, he was hurt. She could see how betrayed he felt in his eyes.

  CHAPTER NINE

  “GIL,” LINC SAID, tugging Marley to his side. “I know this looks bad.”

  “You lied to me,” he said, staring at Marley.

  “No. Not really. I mean, I told you I was thinking of dating someone
in the industry—”

  “But Linc Shepherd?” He ran a hand through his hair. “I can’t believe you meant Linc.”

  “We’ve been dating for weeks,” Linc felt the need to point out.

  It was the wrong thing to say to his boss. Linc felt Marley tense alongside of him.

  “Is this true?” Gil asked.

  Linc glanced down in time to watch Marley nod miserably. “It is,” she said.

  And then Gil’s bewildered gaze snagged Linc’s. “And you went along with her?”

  “He didn’t ‘go along’ with me.”

  “You mean he made the first pass?” Gil asked.

  Linc saw Marley look away again.

  Gil glared at him next. “I hired you to drive cars, not hop into bed with my sister.”

  “Gil!” Marley cried.

  The words stung, Linc’s guilt compounded by the realization that his boss had a point. He should have been focusing on driving, not Marley. This was his shot at a comeback and look at what a mess he’d made of it.

  “Is this why your finishes have dropped off?” Gil asked.

  “No,” Linc said.

  But was it? Was Marley the reason why he was so unfocused? Was he shooting himself in the foot careerwise…over a woman? He scrubbed a hand over his face.

  “Really,” Gil said, looking between the two of them.

  “I wonder.”

  Linc wondered, too.

  “You hurt me, Marley,” Gil said, his eyes filled with sadness. “You should have been honest with me the other day.”

  “I know,” she said, meeting her brother’s gaze head-on. “But I didn’t want to worry you.”

  “So you snuck around behind my back.”

  Neither of them said a word. “I’m disappointed in both of you,” Gil said before turning and walking off.

  “Gil,” Marley said, stepping away from him.

  But her brother was already gone. Marley tried to follow, Linc held her back. “Give him a few hours.”

  “He’s devastated. It’s going to take him longer than that,” Marley said, worry creasing her forehead.

  “No, it’s not.”

  “I’ve never lied to him before.”

  “You had your reasons,” he said.

  She met his gaze. “Did I?”

  He touched her face, gently turned her toward him. “He’ll get over it. You’re his baby sister,” he said gently.

  She nodded, her eyes sad. “I know.”

  “But I don’t think of you as a kid anymore.”

  Her face softened a bit. “I sure hope not.”

  And it was good to know he could kiss her now, really, truly kiss her. But when his lips lowered to hers, she didn’t immediately respond. She was stiff in his arms, too.

  “What’s wrong?” he asked.

  She shook her head a bit. “I’m just sorry Gil had to find out this way.”

  “It was bound to happen sooner or later.”

  She nodded. “Maybe we should cool things off for a bit.”

  “No,” he said. “If we do that, it’ll look even worse. Like we weren’t really serious about each other or something.”

  “You think?”

  “I know,” he said firmly.

  “You’re probably right, but I should still get going,” she said. “If I’m not at work on time tomorrow, I’m sure Gil will know. He’ll be keeping close tabs on me now.”

  Linc released her, though he hated to do so. To be honest, he’d become more and more dependent on her in recent weeks. Not a day went by, sometimes not even hours, when he wasn’t talking to her. It amazed him that the bothersome teenage girl had grown into such a complex, fascinating woman.

  He refused to give her up. Refused.

  “Okay,” he said, giving her a small peck on the lips. “I’ll call you in the morning.”

  She nodded. But as she walked away, and the drama of the night wore off, he began to wonder if she wasn’t right. Gil had every reason to feel betrayed. The man had put faith in Linc’s abilities when no one else would. And what had he done? Linc had slept with his sister, behind the man’s back no less.

  “Damn,” he muttered. He’d have to go apologize.

  And pray to God he didn’t get fired.

  MARLEY DREADED going into work the next morning.

  “Gil would like to see you,” Emma-Lee said, pouncing on her in the hallway.

  It wasn’t even eight o’clock yet. Marley had come in early. To be honest, she’d been hoping to get to work ahead of her brother so she wouldn’t bump into him in the parking lot.

  Oh, well.

  “Okay, thanks,” she said.

  “What’d you do?” Emma-Lee said, her blue eyes full of curiosity. “He doesn’t look happy.”

  Marley shook her head. “Nothing.”

  Gil’s offices were on the second floor, too, and so as she walked up the steps near the main reception area, her feet felt leaden. She didn’t know what he would say to her, but she had a feeling it wouldn’t be good. Despite the fact that she was a grown woman, Gil was still her older brother. She felt a lecture coming on.

  She knocked on his door lightly, popping her head in before he could answer. “You wanted to see me?” she asked.

  He sat behind a large desk—“the throne,” she’d dubbed it—with a window behind him. His office was done in shades of gray; the desk he sat behind made of glass and chrome. He had his chair turned away from the door. Marley realized that he’d watched her cross the parking lot. Terrific.

  “Gil?” she said when he didn’t immediately turn around. Her mind was filled with trepidation as she entered his office. Slowly, he turned to face her.

  The look on his face was enough to make her flinch.

  “Sit down,” he said, motioning to one of two chairs in front of his desk.

  She didn’t want to. She really didn’t. Suddenly, she felt about ten years old. “Gil, about last night—”

  He held up a hand. She instantly quieted.

  “Marley, how many years have you worked for me now?”

  Marley gulped, had to wrack her brains for a moment or two. “Since college,” she said. “About seven years now, I guess.”

  He nodded, and she had to admit, he looked every inch the big brother sitting there. Face grave. Eyes serious. Back straight. “And have I ever asked you to do something you don’t want to do?”

  She could tell he’d stayed up all night thinking about what he wanted to say to her. “No,” she said.

  “And don’t I always have your best interest at heart?”

  “Yes,” she said, sinking into her chair.

  “Then break things off with Linc.”

  “No.”

  Gil leaned forward, made a temple out of his hands and tapped them against his mouth. She knew the gesture well. He was trying to formulate his words. He’d done the same thing after she’d set Linc’s car on fire. And she still couldn’t believe she’d done that.

  “I don’t want you dating him,” he said.

  She opened her mouth to protest.

  “But not for the reason you might think,” he said.

  “I’m going to trust that you know what you’re doing.” She relaxed.

  “But this is bad timing. Linc’s trying to make a comeback, and despite what you say, I’m not convinced you’re not the reason why he’s been off his game.”

  She gulped. Was her brother right? If she’d been honest with herself, that same fear had kept her up half the night.

  “Gil—”

  “Please, Marley.”

  The fight drained out of her. “I’ll think about it,” she said. But deep inside she wondered: What if she really was the problem? What then? What if, later on, Linc came to the same conclusion? What if he blamed her for his failed comeback?

  Dear God, she didn’t think she could take that.

  “Just don’t ask me to do anything right away,” she said, holding up a hand when it appeared as if her brother would say someth
ing else. “I need some time.”

  He seemed to accept that.

  Her shoulders were as heavy as anvils when she turned away. She knew what she had to do. Deep inside, she knew. She just hoped she had the courage to go through with it.

  “WHAT DID he say?”

  Linc knew he’d surprised her by the way she jumped. Her hand was to her chest as she turned to face him. “Linc. What are you doing here?”

  “What do you mean what am I doing here?” he asked.

  “I work here.”

  They were in the hallway, not far from her office. Linc glanced inside a nearby office. It belonged to somebody in marketing, judging by the nameplate on the outside wall. He ducked into it, hoping the office’s owner didn’t come into work early.

  “What are you doing?” she asked.

  He’d expected her to follow him, and when she didn’t, hooked an arm through hers. “I want to talk to you.”

  “We can go into my office,” she said, digging in her two-inch heels. She was dressed in her usual uniform. Black suit, light blue shirt beneath, hair swept back in a ponytail.

  “Not if your brother might track you down there.”

  He could tell she wanted to tell him that Gil wouldn’t do that, but they both knew he might walk down that hall at any moment. She shut the door.

  “So?” he prompted.

  She glanced over her shoulder, as if worried the owner of the office—or her brother—might burst in on them. “He asked me to break things off with you.”

  Linc couldn’t keep the disappointment from his face, and he was certain she could see it. “You’re not going to listen to him, are you?”

  “I think I should,” she said.

  “Why?”

  “Because I think he’s right. I think I might be the reason you’re in a slump. I think I owe it to my brother to back off and see. I think taking a breather might be good for us. Everything happened so fast.”