The Black Farm

by Elias Witherow

  I squeezed my eyes shut and shuddered, grief assaulting me, “Yes, it is…if I had supported you like I should have…if I had been there for you in the way you needed me to be…”

  Jess sniffled and pulled away, cupping my sorrow streaked face in her hands. “I made the choice, too. I wanted to end it. It wasn’t just you.”

  I shook my head, unable to meet her eyes, “No…no…when our baby died…shit…” I covered my face in shame, shoulders shaking as a sob tore through me.

  I felt Jess rub my arm, lovingly. “You were wonderful…you are wonderful. I couldn’t ask for a better man.”

  I gritted my teeth, the confession like acid on my tongue, “Jess, when we lost our son…”

  I pulled my hands away, eyes bloodshot. “When he died, I was relieved.”

  Silence followed and Jess’s expression never changed.

  I forced the words out, shame staining my teeth as they pushed past my lips. “I didn’t want to give you up. I was afraid you’d love the baby more than me. I was afraid I’d lose you to him.”

  Jess reached out but I shook my head. “Jess, I loved our son, I truly did, but when he passed…when he passed, I felt like I got you back.” I stared down at my hands, tears dripping down my face, “and when you fell into depression and started talking about suicide…shit, I couldn’t imagine being left alone in the world. I killed myself because I didn’t want to lose you. I didn’t want to be alone.”

  I covered my face again, shame and disgust rattling me. “I’m a coward; I’m a fucking coward…and I’m sorry, I’m so, so sorry.”

  Hands took mine and gently pulled them away from my face. Jess cupped my chin and forced me to look into her eyes.

  They brimmed with tears and I saw love shining through the shimmering sadness,

  “Nick, I love you more than anything else in the world. Nothing, and I mean nothing, could ever change that.”

  I fell into her arms, needing to feel her, needing to be close to her. I sobbed uncontrollably, unable to help it.

  Jess stroked my hair, cooing softly into my ear.

  “Do you forgive me?” I whispered into her chest, sniffling.

  I felt her lips brush my ear. “Of course I do, Nick.”

  Relief rushed through me like a warm wind and I let out a gasp as I squeezed her tighter. I felt something unraveled from around my heart and float away into the trees, leaving a gentle heat in its place.

  Jess pulled me into her and whispered down to me, “You went through so much to get me out of that horrible place. The things you did, the people you killed…I could see fire in your eyes…” she lifted my face so that our eyes met. “I saw your fire for me. And I love you for that, Nicholas, more than I can ever express.”

  I smiled sadly at her. “I love you, Jessica. More than anything.”

  And then we kissed. It was gentle at first, and then the passion grew, blooming into a desperate need to feel each other, to be with each other, to taste each other. Our tongues tangled and danced together, our breath growing frantic as lust consumed us.

  I guided her down, mouth exploring her neck, shoulders, arms, kissing every bruise and scrape that blemished her skin. Her fingers curled through my hair and she gasped as my hands found her breasts.

  She reached for my pants, almost urgently, and I slid out of them, our need growing. Her hands groped me and I let out a sigh as I stripped her bottoms off. Her teeth bit into my shoulder and she panted hungrily as I positioned myself over her.

  And then we made love, oblivious to everything around us. It was just her and me, the only two people in the entire world, locked in each other’s embrace as everything else melted away.

  When we were finished, collapsing off one another, I pulled Jess close to me and she rested her head on my chest. We lay like that for a while, the forest quiet around us. I stroked her hair and let the weight of everything settle back around me. We still had so far to go. And who knew what actually awaited us at the end of our journey. For a moment, I contemplated just lying there forever. It was a fleeting fantasy, one brought on by the afterglow of sex. I stared at the foliage high above, a viridescent sky that faded to darkness as I closed my eyes. I could feel Jess’s breathing slow, her chest rising and falling in gentle rhythm. I touched her shoulder and discovered she had fallen asleep.

  I let her, content for the moment. I could only imagine what she had gone through at the Temple. I wanted to ask her but felt that if she wanted to share, she would. I was also afraid to discover what she had endured, the weight of it sure to crush my already troubled conscious.

  She forgave you…

  I felt a surge of love for the woman in my arms. All this time, this burden had blazed in the back of my mind. A tremble of guilt that shuddered through me, drove me, fueled me.

  And she had melted that despair with a couple of words.

  You can’t let her down. You have to show her now. Be the man she deserves.

  I balled my hands into fists.

  And find a way out of this fucking place.

  Thought swirled together like color and I washed them out as exhaustion took me again. The Black Farm was quiet, a miracle in and of itself. I listened to the raindrops drip from the leaves above and blocked out all other senses. I knew it was foolish to remain where we were, but I didn’t hear anything and chose to embrace the false silence. If I hadn’t been so tired, caution would have won over, but my body was still in severe pain from the fight.

  I craned my neck around and scanned the dark trees, but there was nothing. No Pig Born sprinting towards us, no bloodthirsty Suicidals, just the ambiance of soggy woodland. I closed my eyes, unable to resist any longer. I felt like I hadn’t slept in weeks.

  As the soft pull of the subconscious tugged away at my mind, a thought drifted to the surface like an air bubble.

  Christ, I hope I don’t wake up falling from the sky.

  12

  I stirred. Something moved to my right. A twig snapped and I bolted upright, searching for my ax. I picked it up and spun, now completely awake as the sound moved closer.

  Jess held up her hands, her eyes wide, staring at the upraised blade. I exhaled, forcing my heart to slow. I lowered my weapon and sighed, placing a hand to my chest.

  “You scared the hell out of me,” I mumbled, apologetically.

  She knelt down next to me, her eyes clear. “I’m sorry. I wanted to let you sleep.”

  I smiled up at her, the expression feeling foreign on my face. “You ok?”

  She nodded, “Yeah. I was just washing some of this grime off of me. I feel like I can still taste the dirt in that basement…”

  I forced myself into a sitting position, surprised at how much better I was feeling, “You have to be careful; please don’t go wandering off alone…”

  She looked hard into my eyes, “I know, Nick.”

  I averted my gaze, “I just don’t want to lose you again…”

  She ran a finger through my hair, “Nick…”

  “Yes?”

  “What are we going to do? We can’t stay here forever…this place…”

  I tested my wrapped shoulder and was pleased to find the burning pain had receded a little. “We’re going to get out of here.”

  She let out a sigh, sad and hopeless, “I don’t think that’s an option. When I woke up here, bound to a chair, this man, Danny…he told me I had to make a choice.”

  “Fuck Danny,” I spat.

  She scooted over to me and rested her head on my shoulder, voice soft, “How are we supposed to survive here? We can’t run forever. And Nick…if those monsters get me again…I don’t think I can take it. They’ll break me in a way I don’t think I can come back from.”

  I rested my cheek on her head. “I won’t let them do that. I have a plan. I met these two guys in a broken down town, not that far from here. They said they were building a raft. They’re going to take it across the ocean, find out what lies at the end of the sea.”

  Jess looke
d up at me. “What about those…those things? I saw them, just once. The stone giants.”

  “The Keepers,” I said, “they’re called the Keepers. I know it’s dangerous, mad even, but Trent, one of the guys I met, thinks we can slip past them. There’s thirteen of them that roam the ocean, stalking the island. If we plan it right, it just might work.”

  “This is an island?” Jess whispered, almost to herself.

  “Trent and Kevin think there might be a way off it, off the Black Farm. I know it sounds crazy, but it’s better than waiting for something to catch us again.”

  Jess stared into my eyes. “Catch us again? Were you taken too, Nick? Did something happen to you?”

  I shifted uncomfortably, the memories of Muck’s cave swelling, “This place has taken something from all of us.”

  She placed her cheek back on my shoulder. “When you killed those awful men from the Temple…I…” she trailed off.

  “What is it?”

  Her voice became quiet, somber, “I’ve just never seen you like that before. It was scary, like I didn’t know who you were for a second. You had this look in your eye…”

  I didn’t know how to respond, so I remained silent. The seconds ticked by, and finally I stood. “Come on. We should probably get moving.”

  Jess rose to her feet and I heard her stomach growl. She wrapped her arms around herself and we began to walk.

  “Are you hungry?” I asked, crunching through the underbrush parallel to the tree line on my left.

  Jess nodded and I realized that I was hungry, as well. No, not just hungry. Starving. I tried to think back on when I last had something to eat and found that I couldn’t. I didn’t have much time to worry about that kind of thing back at the Temple. But now that some of the dust had settled, it was just another pain that I had to ignore.

  And so we walked. Jess would occasionally strip leaves from the trees and suck the water from them, finally popping the whole thing in her mouth, chewing the greenery. She offered me one and I took it wordlessly, my throat grateful for the moisture.

  My leg was feeling better, the pain had receded to a dull throb. I placed the head of the ax over my shoulder and found I could manage without using it as a crutch.

  Occasionally, I’d try and roll my shoulder, wincing when I extended it too far. The gouge felt sticky under the bandage and I didn’t think I had the courage to check on it just yet.

  Every so often, we’d hear the crash of foliage or the snapping of branches. Each time we’d duck down in unison and wait, hearts racing, for the sound to pass us by. We only saw someone once. It was a group of Suicidals, three of them. The were walking into the woods ahead of us, ragged looks on their faces, gaunt skin and empty eyes. Jess and I stopped, my fingers flexing around the ax handle.

  It was two women and one man, of varying ages. They just stared at us, like they were waiting for us to speak. Instead, I brought my ax into full view and they shuffled on by, heads low, the silence bleak.

  After they had gone, Jess looked over at me. “They could have come with us. They looked like they needed help.”

  I shook my head, watching a group of Pig Born beyond the tree line, way off in the distant fields. “There was nothing we could have done.”

  “But maybe they could have followed us to your friends; maybe there would be room for them on the raft?”

  “They can find their own way,” I said darkly.

  Jess let out a sigh. “What about safety in numbers?”

  Again, I shook my head. “Numbers just draws attention.”

  After a moment, Jess let it go, falling back into silence. I could feel her struggling. I was sure she was thinking about her time in captivity, about how she had waited for someone to help her…or for something to just kill her. She was a good woman. She wanted to protect those people.

  I looked over at her, softening, “They’ll be ok.”

  “They just looked so scared…”

  I ducked under a low hanging branch. “We’re all scared.”

  She glanced over at me, her voice neutral, “You don’t seem to be.”

  I almost laughed. “Jess, I’m scared out of my fucking mind right now.”

  She walked closer and pressed her body against mine. “How did we get here, Nick…?”

  I wrapped an arm around her and sighed heavily, keeping a sharp eye out for movement. “I don’t know. This place, these things…none of them were supposed to exist. I thought that when we swallowed those pills, everything would fade away into serene nothingness. If I had known…if I could do it all over again…hell, life doesn’t seem that bad in retrospect.”

  Jess stumbled over a rock and I steadied her before she spoke. “Do you really think we can get out of here?”

  I was quiet for a long time and then whispered, “I don’t know.”

  The conversation died and I let it go, embracing the steady ruffle of dead leaves and twigs beneath my boots. The woods trailed around us, an endless flow of mirrored landscape. We stayed about a dozen yards deep into the tree line, the mountain and dead sun a far off picture between the trees.

  Eventually, we began to hear the sound of waves beating against the shore and I knew we were reaching the end of our trek. I didn’t know how long we had walked, but it felt like days. My legs were burning and the ache in my muscles had started to jolt with every step. I could feel Jess beside me struggling as well, her breath coming out in ragged exhales.

  We pressed on, the sound of water growing closer until I squinted through the trees and saw the distant outline of broken shacks.

  I squeezed Jess’s arm and pointed. “Look, there it is. We made it.”

  “Finally,” she said, fatigued.

  I felt a flicker of hope dart across my mind as we broke the tree line and headed for the shanty town. The twisted construction looked just as empty as the first time I had been through it, the make-shift houses standing quietly in the rolling grasslands with the long stretch of beach bordering the shambled edge.

  We increased our pace, sharing a mutual feeling of encouragement that we had made it this far. The rain had let up and lazily spat from the gloomy heavens, a dampness settling back over our sweaty skin. As the houses grew closer, I looked over my shoulder and froze.

  The mountain loomed on the horizon…and I saw a flash of light blink from its summit.

  But it was red this time.

  It sent a chill running through me and I placed a hand on the small of Jess’s back, urging her on. Something about that light twisted my stomach.

  We approached the first house on the edge of the town and cautiously proceeded deeper inward. A thought fluttered through my mind like a dark butterfly.

  What if Trent and Kevin left already? What if they’re dead?

  That pit in my stomach grew, but it thankfully didn’t last long.

  Two people emerged from a house in front of us, their familiar faces bringing a smile to my cracked lips.

  “Holy-y-y shit,” Trent exclaimed, bounding down the steps and running towards me, a big grin on his face.

  Kevin smiled where he stood and crossed his arms, shaking his head at us. “I can’t believe it.”

  Trent embraced me in a hug, slapping me on the back and bringing forth a grunt of pain as my shoulder creaked.

  “Goddamn it, Nick, I didn’t think I’d ever see you again!” Trent said pulling away.

  I chuckled, “Right back at you. Shit, but it’s good to see you guys!”

  Kevin walked toward us, still grinning. “And it looks like you found who you were looking for.”

  Jess clung to me, unsure. “Are these the men you were talking about?”

  I nodded. “Yeah, these are the guys with the raft.”

  Trent looked apologetically at Jess. “I don’t know if you remember us…we stumbled across you in the woods some time ago…before the Hooves came.”

  Kevin stood next to Trent, his eyes sad. “I’m really sorry we couldn’t help you. They just came out of
nowhere. We’re not bad people, ya know?”

  Jess looked from Kevin to Trent and then back at me. “I’m sorry, I-I don’t remember much from before I was taken…”

  I squeezed her hand. “It’s ok, hon. Don’t worry about it. What matters is that we’re here now and they’re going to help us. Right, guys?”

  Trent held Jess’s gaze for a moment longer before nodding. “Yeah, of course, chief. You two got good timing, I’ll tell you that. We finished the raft a couple hours ago and we were just loading it up with a couple things. It’s down by the shore.”

  “Finally some good news,” I muttered, relieved.

  Kevin looked hard at me. “Are you ok though, dude? You look pretty beat up. Both of you do actually.”

  I shifted my weight. “I had to do some things.”

  Kevin squinted at me, “How many did you kill, Nick? How did you get out of the Temple?”

  Jess suddenly was shaking her head violently, “I don’t want to talk about this. Please. I can’t…”

  Trent held his hands up. “Oh hey, no worries. It’s in the past; no use dredging it back up. You two want to come down and see the raft?”

  I paused. “Sure.”

  Trent clapped his hands. “Cool. Kevin, go grab the last of the supplies and meet us down there. No use waiting to leave now that our guests have arrived.”

  Kevin gave him a thumbs up and sprinted back for the shack, calling over his shoulder, “Don’t leave without me!”

  Trent motioned us forward and we started walking down towards the beach. I leaned into Jess’s ear and whispered, “Are you ok?”

  Jess’s face was stone as she nodded silently.

  I realized then that I would probably never know what had happened during her time beneath the Temple.

  We passed by the huts and the beach opened before us. Grass and mud turned to sand and I looked out at the horizon, over the water. I could see a Keeper far off in the distance, miles from us, walking away from where we were. The sight of it stirred unease inside of me and I took in its towering form. The enormous cross jutting from its shoulders was visible, even at this distance. I could make out the glowing glyphs that lined its body, tiny slits of light shining across the black water.