Chasing Caitlyn

by Marnie Cate

  Stunned, I didn't know what to say, except, "No!"

  "Seth told everyone how your movie theatre date went. He called you his little Alanis. I prefer a bit more full body contact, but I wouldn't have objected to such an appetizer."

  "What? He was lying. We didn't even kiss," I exclaimed.

  "I don't believe you. You were supposed to be special. I gave you gifts. I tried to romance you. Instead, I found out what you really are – a whore."

  "I didn't know the gifts were from you." Did he ask me to prom because of the lies?

  Christopher's lip curled up in disgust. "Have you fucked the entire school by now, or are there a few left on your list?"

  I began to object, but he put his pointer finger on my mouth silencing me.

  "Did you think the guys you dated wouldn't swap stories about Caitlyn Chase, and how the dirty slut would do it anywhere?"

  "I promise I never had sex with any of them. They are lying about me," I exclaimed, pushing his hand away. "I've never –"

  "I don't believe you," he said, voice void of emotion.

  He unzipped his pants exposing himself. I looked away. This is not real. You are dreaming. He pulled a condom out of his pocket and ripped the foil off with his teeth. With a steely expression, he covered himself.

  I stared in shock at the person in front of me. I was frozen in fear. My inner voice screamed, Run! Get out and run! I took a deep breath before I lunged at the door, struggling to open it.

  He grabbed my foot and drug me back to him. Pushing me face down onto the leather, he shoved my dress up to my neck and pinned me down with a strength I did not expect. He ran his fingers over me.

  I began to scream for help.

  He grabbed my hair and pushed my face deeper into the seat. I struggled, but I couldn't fight him off. Soon, I couldn't get any air. My lungs burned. I didn't choose to stop fighting, but I had no more strength.

  "I'll let go of you if you settle down." His hand gently stroked my hair. As my cries, calmed, he softly whispered, "Now, be a good girl. I won't talk like the others did."

  He lifted off me and gently sat me up. He wrapped his arms around me and stared into my face.

  I blinked the tears away. He wasn't going to hurt me. I would make him understand. Staring into Christopher's blue lifeless eyes, I knew I was wrong.

  The next words I heard would haunt me for the rest of my life. "I hope you were worth the wait."

  Christopher closed his eyes and began to kiss my neck and breasts. It was not romantic or tender. I turned out of his arms and tried to escape again. When he pushed me facedown into the leather, my mind went into protection mode. I tried to block out what was happening.

  I stared at the blue lights and the crystal glasses on the bar as if they would save me. I was not there. This was a horrible nightmare.

  He lifted my hips, gripping his fingers into my flesh. My entire body filled with a sudden burning sensation, ripping me back to reality as he jabbed himself inside me. The more I cried out, the harder his movements became.

  He grabbed my hair and pulled me back to him. "Shh, it will feel better if you just relax," he whispered in my ear. "You're so beautiful. God, you feel amazing. Just like they said, you're tight like a virgin."

  He is doing this because a bunch of boys lied about me?

  I closed my eyes and prayed for him to stop. Every violent movement seemed as if it was cutting my soul. Finally, it ended with him convulsing and collapsing on me. He laid on me breathing heavily.

  "Why did you have to be such a whore, Caitlyn? We could have had something special," he whispered.

  When I thought I could no longer hold in my terror, he composed himself and lifted off me. I lied still, afraid to move.

  "Get up and cover yourself," he growled.

  I didn't move fast enough, so he yanked me into a sitting position and pulled down my dress to cover me. I tugged on it, trying to fix it myself. I willed the fabric to grow like a cocoon and protect me.

  "Drink," he commanded. He pressed a water bottle to my hand.

  I didn't move.

  Angrily, he grabbed it from me and twisted the cap off. He shoved it back into my hand, squeezing the bottle and covering me with the icy liquid. I let out a small squeak of surprise, and he took that opportunity to pour it in my mouth. I submitted and swallowed the drink before he drowned me.

  "Why are you doing this?" I asked. “I liked you so much.”

  "You like me? Don't you like everyone?" he snarled. "It doesn't matter. Sluts like you are available everywhere. There are plenty of clean girls who like me. You disappointed me. You could have been someone special to me. Instead, you turned out to be another very expensive piece of ass. I'll expect payment for the gifts and this evening." He laughed as if he was telling me a joke. His cold laughter rippled through me.

  "Please take me home," I pleaded. "I won't tell anyone what happened.”

  His face had a vacant look. My words were futile. He couldn't hear me. The voice that came out of him was unfamiliar. "You were such a good girl the first time. I think we'll have a bit more fun before I tuck you into your bed."

  A wave of nausea rolled over me. I began gagging and he grabbed my hair and shoved a trash can under my face. "Get puke in my limo and you're dead."

  The contents of my stomach emptied as I violently retched. When there was no more inside, he handed me water.

  "Swish and spit."

  After, he took the bucket, I heard gravel under the tires, and the vehicle began to slow. Everything became blurry and blocks of black flashed before my eyes.

  The limo stopped, and the door flung open. Travis peered in.

  “Help me,” I groggily called out.

  Leaning in towards me, his face grew with concern. “You need my help, Miss?”

  “Yes, please. He…” I couldn’t say it out loud.

  He held out his hand to me, and I quickly grasped it. I clung to my savior. Christopher followed close behind.

  "Is this true Mr. Christopher? Does Miss Chase need help?” Travis held me close to him.

  For one moment, I thought I was saved. The driver smiled down on me, and both men began to laugh.

  The driver grabbed my arm and leaned in close to my face. “I'd love to help you, if you suck my dick.”

  I recoiled in fear, but there was nowhere to go. Christopher grabbed my other elbow, and both men carried me towards a three-story beach house. The sound of waves crashing against the beach filled me with fear. He was going to kill me and throw me in the ocean.

  As we reached the doorway of the home, I tried to jerk away from them, but I was held harder.

  "You have a feisty one tonight," Travis said.

  Christopher shrugged. "She should quiet down when the G kicks in. You will be paid well at the end of the night, so get your hands off my fucking date. I like my girls clean."

  The driver rolled his eyes and pulled a vial out of his pocket. With his pointer finger and thumb, he made an L and shook a bit of white powder into the curve. He quickly snorted the particles. With the cap back on the container, he tossed it. Christopher caught it and shoved it into his pocket.

  "Go now. We are going to party, and you have a limo to clean out," Christopher growled.

  The driver glared and slammed the sliding glass door.

  "Wait, I need my cd. Go get it," Christopher screamed.

  "Fuck, can't you just put on the radio?" the driver yelled.

  I began to cry. A few minutes later, Travis returned with a cd case.

  "Set it up and get out. Tonight, is not a party for three," Christopher snapped before turning his attention back on me. "It is time to get serious. I want the full works. Give me a show like you gave Steve Louis."

  "I don't know what you're talking about," I sobbed.

  He pulled my dress down exposing me. "No need to be coy. Get on my lap and grind on me like you got off Andy Lester. Joe McGuire said you were insatiable."

  "I didn't do any of that.
Please believe me," I begged.

  "I wasn't planning on sharing you with Travis, but if you don’t start behaving, I might change my mind. He won't be as sweet to you as I will. He likes screamers." Christopher went to the bar, and poured two drinks.

  I tried to contain my sobs. "I don't know what you want from me."

  "This will help you calm down." He held a glass to me.

  I accepted it with a trembling hand.

  He sat down on a grey leather couch and downed his glass. "Be a gracious guest and drink, Caitlyn."

  I started to protest. He jumped up and slapped me across the face. Shaking, I began drinking. I gagged on the strong taste. I wasn't going fast enough for him, so he tilted the glass back until I swallowed every last drop. Finished, he threw the glass on the floor and pulled the vial out of his pocket.

  "Strip for me," he demanded.

  When I didn't move, he called, "I'll have Travis help you."

  I trembled uncontrollably, but obeyed. Once again, I didn't move fast enough, so he yanked me down onto the couch. I cried out in pain. He removed my remaining clothing and leered at me.

  "Don’t move." He shook out two lines of white powder across my stomach. He rolled up a hundred-dollar bill and leaned in to snort up the lines.

  "Where did you get this shit, Travis," he called. "Weak as hell."

  Travis responded by turning the music up. I tried to see where the driver was hiding. Fear filled me. Is the driver watching? Is he going to hurt me, also?

  Christopher drew another line on me and quickly snorted it. When he finished, he looked down at me with interest. Once again, Christopher climbed on top of me.

  Everything was fuzzy. I kept coming in and out of consciousness. I began to cry as I realized the music playing was the same soundtrack he had given me.

  The last thing I remembered was him saying, "Just be quiet and you’ll enjoy it."

  Off and on, I came into consciousness, and each time, I wished I hadn't. It was like I was a puppet, and he was reconstructing my alleged sins. I had no concept of time, but eventually, whatever he had given to me was wearing off. The last time I woke, I found Christopher passed out next to me.

  I slid off the bed and searched for my clothes. There wasn't one piece of clothing in the room. Desperate to get away, I decided I would find something to wear when I was safe. I was so focused on escaping that I didn't see Travis when I opened the door.

  "Ah, Ah, Ah," Travis said, waggling his finger at me. "Christopher, we have a runner," he called out.

  Groggily, Christopher stumbled towards me. "Shower," he ordered.

  Understanding the directive, Travis picked me up and carried me, kicking and screaming, to the shower. He tossed me in and turned on the water. Ice cold water poured on me.

  I shrieked.

  He responded by turning the water all the way too hot.

  I screamed as I tried to move out of the scalding stream.

  Christopher reached in, and turned the water to warm. "No marks, fucker," he said, and punched Travis. Ignoring me trembling in the corner, he slipped in the shower and let the water run over his body.

  "Don't worry. I won't compare notes with the guys," he promised. "I've reconsidered, and I want to give you a chance to be my girlfriend."

  I began to cry, and he wrapped his arms around me. It was as if the night had never happened.

  "Shh," he murmured in my ear. "I forgive you. You will be a sweet girl from now on. Let's clean you up and get you home."

  After I was cleaned to his standards, he towel dried me and brushed my hair.

  "Have a seat," he said, pointing to the nearby vanity.

  When I shivered, he wrapped a robe around me. Carefully, he applied make-up to my face, telling me how beautiful I was. Before putting on the lipstick, he kissed me tenderly.

  I looked out the window and saw that the sun was rising. Had I dreamed everything? I drifted in and out of consciousness as I tried to piece everything together. Suddenly, I jerked forward as the limo stopped suddenly. Confusion flooded me. I had no idea how I went from the house to being fulling dressed and riding in the limo again.

  Christopher smiled sweetly from the seat across from me. "I need to remember, the next time we go out, that champagnes is a bit much for you. You were hallucinating as if you were on drugs. Do you take drugs, Caitlyn?" He kept talking as if he hadn't spent the evening violating me. "I'm glad you are sober enough now to go home."

  My body ached in ways I never felt before. I hadn't dreamed anything. "What did you do to me?" I hissed.

  "Nothing you didn't beg for," he said, still using a syrupy sweet voice.

  A sudden memory of him covering my mouth until I gasped for air filled me. I heard him saying, "Tell me you want it", and my own voice saying, "I want you".

  "I didn't ask for…" my voice broke. Bile filled my throat. I had to get away from him.

  My prayers were answered when the limo stopped. Travis opened the door and grinned at me. Christopher got out and shoved his friend out of the way, then held his hand out to me. I refused to take it.

  Pulling his hand back in mock retreat, he stepped back. I grabbed my things and rushed to the door. Christopher followed. As I fumbled with the keys, he grabbed my face and kissed me.

  I slapped him across the face. "You will never touch me again. I am going to tell everyone what you did."

  "You're going to tell everyone you threw yourself at me, in front of hundreds of our classmates, and that you made me drive your friend home first, so you could seduce me? You think your little boyfriends won't confirm what a whore you are?"

  "They lied, and you drugged me."

  "No one will believe you. There is no evidence," he boasted as if we weren't talking about his planned assault on me. He took the keys from me and opened the door.

  I tried to get into the safety of my home, but he grabbed my wrist.

  "Thank you for the lovely evening, Caitlyn. We can do it again sometime." He dropped the keys into my hand and released me.

  I shoved past him into the house and shut the door. I turned bolted every lock, and then rushed around, making sure all entrances were sealed.

  When I was safe in my room, I locked the door to make sure he couldn't get to me. I closed my eyes and slid down it, trying to block out the memories of my broken evening. He was right. No one would believe me. I had thrown myself at him.

  The darkness filled me again and I slipped into unconsciousness. I woke to the sound of my mother. I quickly ripped off everything I was wearing including the bracelet and threw it in the wastebasket. I stared at myself in the mirror.

  He had not left any marks. The only proof of his assault was soreness, an aching feeling throughout my body. I turned the shower to the hottest temperature I could stand, and I scrubbed every inch of my body. When the water finally ran cold, I dried myself off, dressed myself in my warmest pajamas, and climbed into bed.

  Hours later, I was woken by my mother and the sweet smell of pancakes.

  "Wake up sleepy head and tell me about your evening. It’s almost two o’clock,” my mother’s singsong voice chirped, adding to my throbbing headache.

  I was afraid that Christopher and the driver would return, but whatever drug he gave me, knocked me out.

  My mother fussed around my room, and when she made a move towards the bathroom, I jumped up. My dress was in the trash. If she found it, I would have to tell her everything.

  "It was a long night. I'll get dressed and join you. Can I have French toast instead of pancakes,” I requested.

  My ever accommodating mother beamed at my request. "Of course, dear. Any special toppings?"

  "Surprise me." I forced a smile.

  "Oh, I have another surprise waiting for you," she called out as she walked away.

  "I can't handle any more surprises, Mother," I mumbled.

  I showered again after hiding my garbage in my backpack. I would dispose of anything that was connected to that monster. He took my vi
rginity. He stole the prom memories that would have been perfect. He broke me.

  If you hadn't been such an eager whore, I scolded myself. As if the devil and the angel from old cartoons were dueling on my shoulder, I suddenly found myself saying, "I didn't ask for what he did. I was the victim. Those boys lied."

  On the kitchen table, I found a crystal vase filled with four dozen red roses. I stared at the bouquet.

  "Is it from Christopher, dear?" my mother asked. "He is such a nice boy. What a lovely gesture."

  The room began to spin, and I forced myself to sit.

  "Aren't you going to read the card?" my mother prodded.

  I had to decide, here and now. Was I going to tell her the truth or lock it away? Deciding I couldn't let her be hurt also, I picked up the white envelope and slipped out the tiny card. "‘Beautiful flowers for my beautiful girl. To our future. Love, Christopher.’"

  I stared at the words. He had to be insane. Did he think the evening we spent was consensual bliss? How will I face him at school? How will I face all of the boys that had lied about me?

  "He got the beautiful right," Thomas said, appearing over my shoulder.

  Something in me exploded. I pushed myself up, knocking the chair over, as I picked up the flower arrangement. I wanted it gone, but I didn't know what to do with it. The world decided for me as it slipped from my hands and crashed to the floor. I tried to catch it, but instead, ended up with a handful of thorns.

  "Oh my," my mother cried as she rushed in. "What a waste. I'll try to save them, Caitlyn. Don't move. I'll go get the broom."

  "What is going on, Cat?" Thomas whispered.

  "Get them away from me," I hissed through clenched teeth. "I don't want them."

  "Cat, you need to tell…Oh honey, you’re bleeding," he said, taking the roses by the flower. "Let's go clean you up."

  When my mother returned, she saw my injury. "Caitlyn, Let me –"

  "I got it, Hill. We'll go in Cat's bathroom and clean her up. A bit of the glass got her." He looked at the mess and frowned. "I mean, if you can handle this?"