Speak No Evil (The Brotherhood Trilogy #2)

by Jordan Ford

  It hurts to know we’ll never be like that. It doesn’t matter if Kade and I like each other. We can’t be together. Not really.

  I’m well over halfway through my pregnancy now. In a few months I’ll be out of this place, having a baby in some strange hospital. I don’t know if I’ll have the courage to return once I’ve given the baby away. Kade is back with his family now, where he belongs, and although they’ve accepted me—I think—I don’t really have a home here.

  I don’t know where I’ll go.

  I should probably head back to Carson City to check on my mom and brothers. But the thought of doing that terrifies me. What if Dad catches me? What if Antonio wakes from his coma? We still have no word if he has or not, but if he remembers anything, he’ll be after blood.

  I rest my hand on my belly and hope like anything that I never see him again.

  I miss my mom like crazy, though. After I give this baby away, I’m going to need one of her hugs. My chest blooms with an ache that’s becoming more familiar with each passing day.

  The rumbling of an engine catches my attention and I gaze at the driveway until Riley’s car pops into view. The guys hid the stolen car Kade and I brought up here in the depths of the forest. They rolled it into an isolated valley where it will hopefully rust and die, never to be found. It seems like a waste but they wanted to play it safe.

  The car door creaks as Riley jumps out, pulling a bag of groceries behind him.

  “Got you that whole wheat flour you wanted, plus some sugar.”

  “Thank you.”

  “Did they have any cream and yogurt?” Kade asks hopefully.

  I giggle and lightly slap his chest. “You and your ambrosia pie.”

  “Face it, you’ve ruined me for life. No dessert will ever compare.” He leans forward to kiss my cheek. “It’s your signature dish, and I’ll think of you every time I eat it.”

  I try to hide my shudder. I still haven’t told Kade that the pie was the reason Antonio found me in the first place. I didn’t want to taint it for him, and even though I never want to make it again, I will. Because Kade loves it.

  And I love him.

  I swallow the thought down. I haven’t found the guts to tell him how I really feel, and I don’t think I ever will. Although Ana spouted that he loved me that day in the kitchen, he hasn’t actually said it to me.

  I think we’re both a little afraid of those three little words, and if I’m really honest with myself, what’s the point of ever admitting them?

  I’m leaving soon.

  The cloud of pain in my chest rumbles and swirls.

  I can’t think about it. I just have to focus on the fact that, for now, I can sit on his knee, and kiss his lips. I’ll soak in every ounce of goodness before I have to go. Hopefully the sweet memories will keep me strong when I’m close to my breaking point.

  Riley’s boots clomp on the stairs as he carries the groceries up. I rise to help him but he shakes his head. “I’m good.”

  I step back with a slightly narrowed glare but he just snickers and shakes his head again.

  For goodness sake!

  “Pregnancy’s not a sickness, you know. I can carry a bag of groceries.”

  “No you can’t.” Kade grabs my hips and pulls me back onto his knee. “You’re busy.”

  I grin, loving how good his strong thighs feel beneath me. Soaking it in.

  Squinting up at the sun, I bask in the heat while Trey sets the safety catch on the rifle and perches it against the railing.

  “So, anything interesting from town?” he asks Riley as soon as he steps back onto the porch.

  Riley shrugs. “Nothing new to report. No visitors. Just life as normal.”

  “Good.” Trey nods. “And the hardware store? They didn’t ask any questions when you bought some more fertilizer for the garden?”

  “Nope. He just told me it’s about time I started growing something.”

  Trey doesn’t like this. His jaw works to the side, his forehead crinkling.

  “Come on, man.” Riley tips his head. “People know I’m up here. They think I’m crazy, and they’re probably guessing I’m with others, but they haven’t pushed it.”

  “That’s what I don’t get.” Trey’s shoulder hitches. “Shouldn’t they be interested in some young guy who’s living in the haunted cabin fifteen miles up the hill? It’s weird.”

  A shadow drops over Riley’s face at the word ‘haunted.’ His gaze grows distant, a muscle working in his jaw as he stares ahead. I want to know what’s bugging him, but he’d never tell me.

  “You should be grateful, Trey. The sheriff’s a lazy pig. He doesn’t care that some run-down cabin has been taken over. It’s not like he’s going to drag his fat ass up here to investigate. We’ve caused them no trouble so they don’t care.”

  “I still think it’s weird,” Trey mutters.

  “Me too, but I’m not going to complain about it. Caitlin’s an open book. She’ll tell me if anything’s up.”

  “Who’s Caitlin?” Kade sits up straight, pulling me back onto his knee when I nearly slip off.

  Riley tries to act cool and uncaring, but his skin’s getting redder by the second. “She’s my, uh, contact. She works at the general store.”

  “Oh, yeah?” Kade’s eyebrows wiggle.

  “Stop it,” Riley warns. “I have to be nice to her so she can keep me up-to-date on what’s going on.”

  Kade snickers, then shares a look with Trey. “I bet you have to be nice to her.”

  “What’s she like?” I tuck my hair behind my ear, still feeling like I don’t belong in these conversations. There’s so much history between the guys. Bonds that can never be broken. I so want to be a part of this. But I can’t.

  “She’s okay.” Riley shrugs.

  “Okay?” Ana rolls her eyes. “Oh, Riley, you’re so romantic.”

  “I’m not trying to be romantic.” He flings his arms wide. “She’s…okay, fine. She’s pretty. Blonde, blue eyes.”

  “Decent tits?” Kade asks, then winces before giving me an apologetic smile. “Sorry. Bad habit.”

  I snort and shake my head, but don’t miss the small exchange between the boys. Riley gives him a subtle nod and Kade’s thumb pops into the air.

  “Boys,” I mutter.

  “See what I have to put up with?” Ana winks at me, then turns back to Riley. “Your face wouldn’t be this red if you didn’t like her.”

  Riley tries to warn us off with a glare then grits out, “She’s chatty, which is useful to us. That’s the only reason I’m nice to her.”

  Unperturbed, Ana gives him a skeptical frown. “That’s bullshit. Now, what else? Oh!” She clicks her fingers and points at him. “Is she smart?”

  “Very! She’s finishing high school through correspondence and doing extremely well.”

  “Uh-huh.” Ana’s lips twitch as her and Trey share a look.

  “Oh, shut up, all of you.” Riley flicks his fingers between us. “Like we have the liberty of romance when we’re hiding in the mountains, using fake IDs, pretending to be something we’re not. I wouldn’t do that to her. I’m not stringing her along only to break her heart when everything turns to shit.” Raking a hand through his hair, he huffs and clomps down the stairs. “I’m going to check on the traps.”

  We all stay silent after he stalks off.

  I nibble my lip while Kade scratches his forehead. Ana looks between us and then across to Trey.

  Lurching off Kade’s lap, I tug down my T-shirt and head for the stairs. “I’m going to collect some pinecones before supper.”

  “I should water the garden,” Ana murmurs, following me down the steps.

  It’s a somber walk around the house, and I feel a sense of relief when Ana turns one way and I head the other. Collecting the basket from inside the barn, I head up the path and away from the house.

  My insides are trembling as the word ‘romance’ tumbles around inside of me.

  Riley’s probably
right. We don’t have the luxury of falling in love right now.

  Maybe I should be heading down the mountain sooner. Next time Riley goes into town, I could get a ride with him. He’ll understand my leaving. It’s for the best.

  Tears sting my eyes as I trudge up the slope. The hill is littered with pinecones that I can extract nuts from. I’ve also been reading up on making tea with white pine needles. Apparently it’s an excellent source of Vitamin C, and I want to give it a try.

  Bending down, I pick up a handful of fallen needles and brush them across my palm. White pine has soft long needles. I need to make sure I get it right. Sniffing the beautiful scent, I can’t help a soft smile, but it fades away as I drop the needles in my basket and start collecting cones.

  My heart hurts every time I think about not being here. The last month has been amazing. Trey, Ana and Riley soften up around me a little more each day. I think my cooking has helped, plus the fact that I showed them how to plant a vegetable garden, and taught them everything I know. Nothing’s sprouted yet, but Ana’s treating the area like her little baby. Watering it. Checking on it throughout the day. I bet she’ll go nuts when things first sprout.

  I smile.

  Riley’s been making me record recipes and “how-to” videos on his phone. He’s uploading everything to his computer so they can refer back to instructions later. We’ve been researching together, finding out all the forest has to offer, figuring out the best ways to live off the land.

  “I have to convince them to get chickens before I leave,” I murmur, pausing to stretch out my back. I see a decent clump of pinecones a little further up and head toward them. Crouching down is awkward with my growing belly, but I spread my legs wide and find a comfortable position. My mind hums through the logistics of chickens while I fill my basket with cones. I’ve never owned any poultry but surely they can’t be too hard, and there are definitely provisions for them. Riley’s uncle was totally self-sufficient up here, which means we can be to.

  “Stop saying we,” I mutter, my face tightening into a frown.

  I have to start hardening myself against the idea of staying here. The longer I stick around, the worse it’s going to get. This beautiful place with its intoxicating pine scent. This isolated place that’s so far from civilization, you can hear every bird’s song, and the scurry and chatter of squirrels.

  The majestic mountains. The smell of the soil. It’s all so captivating.

  I can see myself here for years.

  The baby flutters, as if to remind me it wants to stay too.

  With a mournful sniff, I splay my fingers over the bump. “I’ll find you another home that’s even better than this. I was even wondering if we should drop you at Keith and Cassidy’s door. They looked to me like they wanted a baby. They’re really nice people too. They’d look after you. They’d…” My voice is sucked into a vortex, swallowed by an overpowering yearning I shouldn’t feel…a debilitating sorrow that numbs me to my core.

  Squeezing my eyes shut, I battle the onset of tears. “You’re a penniless eighteen-year-old. Shut the hell up and do what’s right,” I bark.

  “Jules?” Kade’s voice catches me off-guard. I snap up straight, swiping my face and turning my back on him. “Are you okay?”

  I don’t say anything as he closes the distance between us. His long fingers curl around my shoulder, feeling like home.

  I shrug them off and force a smile. “I’m fine.”

  “What’s the matter?”

  “Nothing.” I shake my head.

  He leans over my shoulder, his lips brushing the top of my ear. “Liar,” he whispers.

  I bite my lips together, scrambling for a partial truth to satisfy him. “I’m going to miss this place.”

  “We don’t have to leave for at least another month.” His fingers brush down my hair, gentle and oblivious. He thinks he’s coming with me.

  I swallow and stare down at the cones in my basket. “I need time to find a family for this baby, Kade. I won’t leave it in foster care. I have to know the baby’s going to be loved and cared for.” He doesn’t say anything and I figure it’s now or never. “You don’t have to come with me. It’s probably safer if you stay up here.”

  “I’m not letting you go on your own.” Gripping my shoulders, he gently turns me to face him.

  I keep my eyes down. I won’t be able to do this if I look at him. He’s too gorgeous. Too everything I want.

  “I can’t have anything bad happen to you,” I manage to whisper. “You have to stay up here where it’s safe.”

  “Not happening.”

  I shake my head. “I’ll be fine.”

  “You’re not going alone.”

  “I was managing on my own before I even met you,” I snap.

  Bad move. Kade’s face is wrinkling with confusion. He’s going to figure out what I’m saying soon…and I’ll hurt him. My gaze shoots back down to the ground and I cradle my bump, scrambling for courage that is eluding me. “I’m thinking of giving the baby to Keith and Cassidy. When I was with them, I got the distinct impression that they’d love to have a child. Maybe they weren’t able to or something. I don’t know, but…they’d make good parents.” My voice wobbles as I struggle to get the words out. “I’m sure we can trust them not to give us away and they can raise…” My voice trails off. I can’t finish that sentence.

  “There’s no way you’re going to Reno. We don’t know if it’s safe yet.”

  “I can contact them. We can meet outside of the city. It’ll be fine.” I reach for Kade’s hand, rubbing my thumb over his knuckles. “But not for you. Rybeck is too big a threat, especially after what happened in the motel. You have to stay up here.”

  “I’m not letting you leave me, Jules.” His voice is firm as he puts his fingers under my chin and gently forces me to look at him.

  My eyes burn with tears. The edges of Kade’s face go blurry. “What else are we supposed to do? It’s not like I can stay. There’s a baby to think about! And I don’t want you to get hurt. The best solution is for me to just go. Please, don’t make this harder than it has to be.”

  I go to stomp away but he grabs my arm, dragging me back to face him. Cupping my cheeks, he holds me steady and freezes me still with that blue gaze of his—so deep, so compelling.

  “You’re not going alone. I won’t let you do it. Now, if you want to give this baby to Keith and Cassidy, fine. But we’ll make a plan. You can have the baby somewhere safe and then Riley can take it for you.”

  I blanch at the thought, leaning away from him with a sharp frown.

  He sighs and closes his eyes. “If you have to go too, so be it, but then you’re coming back up here.”

  “What?” I wasn’t expecting that.

  “I need you, babe. You’re the only girl I’ve ever…”

  My breath cuts off as I stare at him.

  His jaw works to the side and he gazes at the ground between us.

  I brush my fingers down his cheek. “You’ve ever what?”

  “Loved,” he whispers and looks at me. The soft smile in his eyes make my knees want to buckle. “I love you, Jules. I can’t live without you. You gotta promise you’ll come back to me.”

  Holy crap, he means it.

  No one’s ever looked at me like this before…asked me to make such a promise.

  But for him I would.

  Giving this baby away is going to be torture. I know it is.

  The thought of returning to this place…to Kade…it’s a balm. It won’t take the pain away, but it might give me the strength to do this—knowing his arms will be waiting for me on the other side.

  With a watery smile, I hold his face and rise to my tiptoes. “I love you too, Kade Kingsley. Of course I’ll come back to you.”

  He lightly squeezes me around the middle, then pulls me in for a kiss.

  And not just any kiss.

  This one’s different.

  It’s a long-winded, slow-dance kiss that makes time d
isappear and all the promises whispered in this forest seem real.

  #32:

  Eaten Alive

  Kade

  Basketball.

  That’s what I think every time I look at Julienne’s stomach. It’s round and perfect and surprisingly beautiful. Since deciding to give the baby to Keith and Cassidy, she’s seemed a little happier. We still don’t know if they want it. We’re going to leave that phone call until the last possible moment. Kind of cruel, I guess. It doesn’t exactly give them much time to prepare, but we’re stocking up on the immediate supplies so that we can hand over the baby and most of what they need to start with.

  Our thinking is two-fold. Putting them on the spot will make it impossible for them to say no. Yeah, it’s a dick move, but Jules seems set on giving her baby to people she trusts. The Trumans were so good to us. They really are the perfect choice.

  Secondly, if we wait until the last possible moment, there’s less chance of them being found out, questioned or followed. Hopefully they can return to Reno with a Surprise! We’ve been secretly working on adopting a baby and here it is!

  I wince. The story’s kind of lame, but hopefully it’ll hold up around their family and friends.

  Damn, I can’t wait for this to be over.

  When it’s done, Jules will come back to me and we can start fresh up here.

  I never in a million years would have thought I’d be into the idea of living off the land and making a home for myself in the mountains.

  But that’s exactly what I’m doing.

  I’ve gone from hating it to loving it.

  And it’s all because of Jules.

  She makes everything rich and desirable.

  Her laughter is like music as she rests her hand on Ana’s shoulder and they giggle over some joke I didn’t hear. They’re making applesauce from the scrap produce Riley’s friend gave us yesterday—two whole sacks of apples. The house smells so good, reminding me of Grandma Ellen’s Thanksgiving apple pie.

  Ana licks the sweet sauce off her finger and starts laughing again, glancing over her shoulder to tell Jules about the week we trained her how to be a guy. Jules giggles when Ana starts describing the Gauntlet as only she can.