Ties That Bind (The Escort, #3)

by Kristen Strassel

  “I need to read everything, too. We’ll probably have different questions.” He grinned, and I narrowed my eyes at him, not really seeing what part of this was cheerful. “And she didn’t say no sex. She said no vaginal sex.”

  “Same thing.” I crossed my arms and stared at the window.

  “No, it’s not.” He chuckled. “Stop pouting.”

  Protest was on the tip of my tongue, but I was guilty as charged. “Sure, you’re thinking of this as a ticket to never-ending blowjobs, but—“

  “I won’t complain if that’s your MO, but there’s other ways to get you off.”

  “Oh yeah?” In theory, I knew I was in excellent hands. Jagger didn’t get paid to fuck anymore, but he’d always be a professional. But I wanted him inside me. I woke up with a hunger for it every day, and that craving had changed every facet of my life. It wasn’t something I could quit cold turkey, especially when I needed the comfort of Jagger’s body more than ever.

  A healthy baby and a little bit of amazing sex. It was all I wanted.

  “Yeah. There’s so many things we can do. You don’t even have to get undressed.”

  “Showoff.”

  “Maybe.” He laughed. “But I don’t plan on depriving myself of the best view in the world, since I’ll have to wait to be inside you until the coast is clear.”

  So much for the pelvic rest thing. Just his words had the forbidden region pulsing. I side-eyed him. “I have full faith in your abilities. But you still need to prove yourself.”

  He pulled into the parking garage under our apartment building, took off his sunglasses, and met my gaze. Desire had ignited in his eyes, even in the low light. It warmed me in places that should’ve been immune to it by now. “I’ve never shied away from a challenge.”

  I didn’t expect him to climb over the center console and kiss me. He straddled my legs, and pushed me up against the window. I should’ve challenged him sooner. His lips were hungry like he’d already gone too long without, even though we’d been together this morning. And last night. Jagger would not be denied, no matter what the nurse’s orders were. His fingers intertwined in mine, pulling my hands away from my body, and most maddeningly, his body. I wanted to grip him, handle him in any way I could, but instead he had me in freefall.

  The kiss left me in a daze, and I practically floated to the building, anchored only by his hand. We had the elevator to ourselves, and he backed me against the wall, picking up where he left off with the kiss. I gave into it, letting my head fall back against the mirror, but kept my eyes open to see what he had in mind. His breath was hot against my neck, and he unclasped my bra, lingering long enough to make me panic when the elevator stopped. Jagger stood up straight, raking his hand through his hair like he always did when he didn’t get what he wanted. I smiled at the delivery guy who joined us.

  “You have lipstick on your chin,” I whispered. The delivery guy wasn’t paying any attention to us.

  Jagger paused and reached for his chin, but didn’t wipe it away. His grin was incendiary. “It’s gonna be in a lot of other places soon, too.”

  I glanced back at the delivery guy. This time, I caught his eye and he winked at me. He’d been paying more attention than I thought. I grabbed Jagger by his shirt and leaned in close to deliver my message. It was meant for an audience of one. “I thought you said this wasn’t all about blow jobs.”

  “It’s not, but there’s no ban on those.” The door opened, and Jagger motioned for me to go first.

  The tension rolling between us had a taste—sweet and savory; a real, tangible thing. I’d wanted to push him against the wall and beg him to take me, but there was no way we could control ourselves. I wanted what I couldn’t have. Jagger’s rough and ready hands all over me. Reassurance that everything would be okay.

  He tossed his keys on the kitchen counter. The wicked heat from the elevator had yet to fade. My future husband had become forbidden fruit and he was loving every minute of it. I placed my purse and the pamphlets beside his keys, and considered the cover of the top one.

  Jagger took the pamphlets away from me. “Not now. Come with me to bed.”

  “Now?” The thing in the elevator was pretty hot, but we had dozens of near-miss encounters a day. It was impossible for all of them to end in sex. We’d never get anything accomplished.

  He nodded. “If you try to read those now, all the information will bounce off you and you won’t feel better.” He took a step closer to me and ran the back of his fingers over my cheek. He understood how much I needed that. To feel better. Or simply, to not be denied feeling. Jagger spoke sex as a second language. “It will make much more sense when you can relax. And I can take one of your worries off your mind.”

  I scooted in closer. “What’s that?”

  “I’m going to make you come so hard you forget your name.” His warm breath against my cheek was a promise of that.

  I rolled my eyes, stepping away even though my knees were knocking. “The nurse said no strenuous activity.”

  “Then you can remember your name.” He grabbed my hand. “Hey, look at me. There’s absolutely nothing sexier than my baby growing inside you. I’m going to remind you of that every single day. No matter how I have to do it.”

  “You already have.” I brushed my lips against his. “But I still want to see what you have in mind.”

  He led me into the bedroom without another word. Words were too messy, they could be misconstrued, used as weapons even when they were meant to be encouraging. I needed to feel the overwhelming sense of love and safety that Jagger provided for me. Fear wouldn’t make anything better.

  I stood perfectly still, handing the reins over to Jagger. He slipped the sweater from my shoulders, and let it fall to the floor. I shuddered as his breath danced over my bare skin. I had no idea what he planned to do, and the anticipation drove me straight to the edge.

  He undressed me slowly, like he’d wanted to savor every inch of flesh he revealed. Tracing the path of the clothing, he ghosted his fingers over my skin, stopping every so often to flick his gaze up to me. My breath caught in my throat every time he did it, like the world ceased to spin for the moment.

  Guiding me down the bed, he encouraged me to lean back so he could take off my skirt. He left my panties on, a reminder to himself that the area was off limits. It was probably for the best. He pulled his T-shirt over his head, but he left his shorts on. His hair fell in his face, brushing his bare shoulders, and obscuring the dragon tattoo on his shoulder. I drank it all in until I was dizzy from lust and anticipation.

  Jagger pushed his hair away from his face and licked his lips. “Scoot back on the bed,” he said softly. “I’ll be right back.”

  My body shook as I crawled up the bed. The day had already been such an emotional roller coaster, I’d almost forgotten that I’d cyber-stalked Jagger and his former costars before the appointment. I wondered what it would’ve been like to be in one of those movies with him. None of it would’ve been sweet or sensual, judging from the titles it would’ve been impersonal and rough. I wondered if any of them were still available, and if I could bring myself to watch them. His eyes had been so different in that old headshot—so hopeful. I’d die if I actually witnessed the moment the light inside them went out.

  I climbed under the blanket to ward off the chill that thought ushered in, and hugged the pillow. Jagger came back into the bedroom, still in his shorts. He placed a bottle of something on the nightstand. I didn’t have a chance to notice what it was before he climbed on the bed, kneeling with one leg on either side of my head. I rolled onto my back in time to meet Jagger’s lips in a kiss.

  He didn’t touch me with anything but his lips and his hair that tickled my face and chest. I clung tightly to the blanket or else I would’ve grabbed him and tried to guide him. If I’d done that, I would’ve missed what he was trying to tell me with his kiss, and I wanted to hear his message loud and clear.

  When we separated, Jagger let out a sound
that was a cross between a moan and a sigh. I couldn’t see his eyes through the hair hanging in his face, just the rise and fall of his shoulders.

  He whipped his head back and took a deep breath. His fingers were in my hair when he looked down at me, massaging tiny circles on my scalp. Every rotation loosened my muscles a little more, and I started to relax. To think it would be okay. That the scary stuff in those pamphlets on the counter wouldn’t apply to me.

  Our baby would be happy, healthy, and without a doubt, loved.

  I’d fallen into a trance, closing my eyes and concentrating on the movement. He kept one hand in my hair while he reached for the bottle he’d brought back with him. At this point, I didn’t care what was doing, as long as he kept touching me.

  For a brief second he broke contact. My eyes flew open from the shock, the incredible emptiness, to see him rubbing his shiny hands together. I closed them again once his slick fingers landed on my skin, tracing the line of my eyebrows. If any part of me had fought to hold on to a little bit of remaining tension, the bond snapped. It wasn’t only gone, it was forgotten.

  This wasn’t the first time Jagger had given me a massage. He’d told me that Barry, his old boss from the escorting agency, had him train to become a massage therapist. Like everything Jagger did, he put his heart into it and gave it his own unique touch. I smiled thinking that, and at the rotations Jagger made just above my eyebrows, drawing down and lingering at my temples before coming back to center.

  I moaned.

  “How’s that?” he asked.

  I wasn’t sure I’d be able to speak. “My toes just curled.”

  “There are so many erogenous zones that people ignore, and everyone has special ones,” he said. Those tiny circles started to build inside me. “You always go for my hair, and that’s how I knew you’d turn to putty with a head rub.”

  I opened my mouth to speak, but had to bite my lip instead. The fluttering started deep in a place Jagger had touched many, many times. A place that was off-limits until the baby said otherwise. At first I tried to stop it, in case we were doing something wrong, but the nurse said I could orgasm. And it was a good thing, because there was absolutely nothing I could do to stop it from coming.

  I slipped my hand inside my panties. It didn’t take much to trigger an implosion. I’d been super sensitive the first time I was pregnant, and this time wasn’t much different. Well, everything was different. I concentrated on Jagger, his parted lips and heavy lidded eyes, until my vision blurred.

  And if Jagger could’ve brought it to a screeching halt, he had no desire to. The little circles intensified, and I didn’t fight the inevitable. I followed the flow of sensation through my body, from Jagger’s fingertips to my throbbing pussy.

  As I started to come back down, Jagger rubbed my temples. “That was amazing,” I said, my voice still breathy.

  He leaned in for a quick kiss, getting away from me before I could truly show him how amazing I thought it was. As he rubbed my neck, he had to have felt my heartbeat thundering to meet his touch. His next stop was my shoulders. With each circle he pushed the blanket down a little further. I wriggled it down to my thighs, I couldn’t manage much more while firm in Jagger’s grip, but it was enough to be able to kick it away.

  I’d been naked before him so many times, but this felt like an offering. Claire’s voice echoed in my head. He likes to take care of people. And like me, he’d been pushed away so many times. I wondered whether people realized it was hurtful, or if they thought they were making my life easier. What they didn’t realize were the little things, like cooking or giving someone a head rub, nourished our souls. I was going to let Jagger take care of me. After being strong for so long on my own, I needed to let someone else take the reins.

  He only paused for more oil before lavishing attention on my breasts, so many circles I got dizzy trying to stay in the moment. I didn’t want to miss any of it. The way his fingers felt against my skin, and every electric bolt his touch sent shooting through me. Each circle got smaller, until he closed in on my nipples. A quick pinch brought me back from the place I’d drifted to, and I couldn’t keep my reaction in as he rolled them between his fingers. I didn’t have to hold back anymore, but I’d trained myself to do so when Raven used to sleep down the hall from us.

  I chuckled.

  “What’s funny?” Jagger asked, leaning over me.

  “I haven’t told Raven about the baby yet. That will be a fun conversation.”

  He smirked. “Sorry I’ll miss it.”

  “Maybe we can do a video chat. I mean, the look on her face is going to be priceless.” I dreaded that she’d think I was moving on without her, that I’d replaced her and started a new family. It couldn’t be further from the truth, but it took her a long time to adjust to the divorce.

  And once Raven knew, she was sure to share the news with Rich. He’d snuff any warm and fuzzy feelings with one snarky remark.

  “Think of it this way. Better you tell her about a baby than the other way around.” Jagger didn’t give me a chance to respond before he lowered his face to my nipples, repeating the movements he’d made with his fingers with his mouth. This time, I reached for his hair, thinking I’d mimic the movements that had brought me over the edge, but I couldn’t. I could only grasp and pull. The noises Jagger made didn’t sound like complaints.

  He didn’t try to break free from my grip when his hands were on the move again. This time they swirled around my belly.

  “Jagger,” I gasped.

  He stopped. “You don’t like that?”

  “No, it’s not that.” I liked it a lot. “I’m scared.”

  “That it’s going to do something to the baby?” he asked. I nodded. He sat up and pushed his hair away from his face. “I don’t think so. She’ll know we’re excited to meet her. Once she’s bigger, I can’t wait to feel her kick.”

  “You think it’s a she?” I did have a proven track record of making beautiful little girls.

  Jagger lay down beside me, pulling the blanket over us. His hand was back on my stomach, and this time it brought me comfort. “Obviously, it could go either way.” He grinned before kissing my forehead. “Promise you’ll do me a favor?”

  I smiled. “Anything.” Especially after that massage.

  “Don’t waste your time worrying. I know none of this is working out how we planned. We’ll figure it out. And let me tell you a secret. I like it better this way.”

  Chapter Fourteen

  Jagger

  Leah smiled in her sleep when I kissed her forehead, but otherwise didn’t stir. I could watch her sleep forever. Ever since she’d moved down here, she’d been restless. With so much up in the air during the day—her business and mine, and now the baby, she tossed and turned all night.

  We had yet to talk about the wedding. I was happy to keep that simple.

  Even though Leah was used to doing things on her own, she didn’t have to anymore. This was terrifying for me, too. I had a tendency to fuck up everything I touched beyond all recognition. Not this time. I couldn’t. I slipped out of bed, lingering in the doorway to make sure she didn’t wake without me. She needed the sleep.

  I picked up the pile of pamphlets that the nurse had sent us home with. I tried to make sense of the information, piecing together the text and what we’d been told. From what I could tell, there was nothing actually wrong with the baby, which was a massive relief. The placenta had just settled near Leah’s cervix. Stress and strain could cause bleeding. Chances were, the condition would correct itself. But it was possible it wouldn’t, especially since Leah was in her late thirties, and she’d had procedures before.

  The most important thing was the baby was okay. Everything else we could work around. Not signing the lease on the space next to me had been a blessing in disguise. I loved Shannon’s suggestion to have the design office at the gallery. The idea of all of us working together, building something completely new and completely us was exciting. Leah was co
ncerned that she’d be limited in what she could do, but I was more than willing to be the muscle. If we really needed it, I could probably call in some favors from the guys I worked with at the agency.

  Quite a few of them hadn’t wanted to be pimped out by Zach. Contrary to popular belief, escorting wasn’t just about the fucking. That was a huge perk, but for me, it was about giving something to someone that they didn’t have without me.

  That was bullshit. At the end it was all about the money.

  It wasn’t that different than what Leah did with interior design. She loved creating a home, but working for the network had changed everything, and made her make decisions that got her away from what she wanted.

  We’d make the design business a success. I had ideas of how we could incorporate it into the next First Friday, but I had no idea how to execute them. If I asked Leah, she’d throw herself completely into the project. No. She had to give herself permission to relax. All she had to do was give us the instructions.

  I needed to get in touch with Shannon.

  Opening Leah’s purse to find her phone felt gross. I’d been taught from an early age that this was one place I did not belong. The phone was close to the top and the message light was blinking. Fuck. I was pretty sure we had the same phone and I could probably get in and out without losing her new messages.

  The other day she’d taken a picture from the balcony of the sun setting over the ocean and made it her background picture. As she did it, I realized we had no pictures of us together. I’d taken plenty of her, but she had none of me. We had to fix that.

  The message covered the deepest oranges and pinks of the image. It was from Kari. Since it was right in front of my face, there was no way I couldn’t read it.

  Roxie Suxoff might be the greatest stage name ever. I’ll do my best to line it up with her real name. The birthday is a big help. Keep you posted.