Blonde With a Wand

by Vicki Lewis Thompson

  He liked being a commodities broker with a normal American lifestyle. If something about this sexual experience felt all happily-ever-after, then he’d blame the transformation for crossing some wires in his brain. She was just a good lay. That’s all she meant to him at this moment and all she’d ever be.

  She seemed lost in a daze of satisfaction and he felt pretty much that way himself, but he was the guy with the condom, so he was assigned the job of getting out of bed and heading for the bathroom. He glanced at the bedside clock as he went by and noticed it was almost twelve thirty.

  Maybe he was getting tuned in to this magic stuff, because after he saw the time he had a strong feeling that his interlude as a man was about to end. Sure enough, he’d no sooner disposed of the condom than the dizziness started. He dropped to the floor so he wouldn’t fall and crack his head on something when he blacked out. He really, really hated this part.

  When he regained consciousness, he was crouched on the floor, back to viewing the world from the feline angle. He was pissed that he’d transformed back, but not quite as pissed as he had been the night before. Great sex could mellow a guy out, even when he faced returning to life as a housecat.

  Besides the sex, he had another reason for optimism. He’d extended his time from ten minutes to an hour. He hated to think how much of that glop he’d have to drink in order to get two hours of human time, but at least there was a ray of hope that he wasn’t stuck like this forever.

  “Jasper? Are you okay?” Anica walked naked into the bathroom, spied him crouched there and began to cry.

  He hated that she was crying, even though, looking at it realistically, this was all her fault. Still, she’d been so happy a moment ago, lying there flushed and smiling in the light from the bedside table lamp.

  “Jasper, I’m so, so sorry!” She scooped him up, cradling him against her bare breasts as she buried her face in his fur and cried some more.

  He was sorry, too, but she was getting him wet. Her breasts were cushy and nice, though. She’d be good to cuddle with after sex, but he hadn’t had that chance. That was also her fault, but he wished she’d stop crying about it.

  She sniffed and raised her head to reveal eyes that were red and still leaking. She wasn’t a delicate crier. “I’ll bet you don’t like this emotionalism, do you?”

  He gazed up at her and tried to signal in the affirmative by blinking at her.

  “I mean, you’re the one with the big problem, and I’m the one falling apart over it. You didn’t fall apart when you changed back.” She gulped. “Instead you made wonderful love to me.”

  Not love. Sex. He wasn’t about to confuse the two, and he didn’t want her to, either. They’d had sexual chemistry from the get-go, and even though she’d changed him into a cat he still craved her body, especially when he had a body that matched.

  He might always crave her body, but she wasn’t destined to be his mate for life, not with that witch thing going on. Their sex tonight had been a good use of time and he was glad they’d done it, but he could easily give her up once he was fully released from this curse she’d put on him.

  She carried him back into the bedroom. “At least you changed for an hour this time.” She sniffed again. “We’re making progress. Maybe you’ll change back once more before the night’s over.”

  Nice thought, but he doubted it. Although he’d only changed twice, it had followed a pattern. The first time he’d been allowed five minutes on each side of midnight. Tonight he’d had thirty minutes on each side of midnight. Midnight seemed to be the key.

  Still holding him, Anica climbed into bed. He struggled to get away, but didn’t use his claws because of her silky bare breasts.

  “Humor me, Jasper,” she said. “I need someone to hold.”

  Jasper looked around for Orion. Orion could be the man for the job. But the orange tabby wasn’t in sight. Come to think of it, he hadn’t been seen since Anica had left to get the beer.

  Then Jasper figured it out. He’d dated a few women with cats, and usually they closed them away if things got hot and heavy. On one memorable occasion, a woman hadn’t done that. Jasper had been pumping away when he’d felt an excruciating pain in his balls. Seems the cat had mistaken them for a dangly toy.

  Thank God Anica had used good sense and apparently tucked Orion in the closet. An incident like that might have seriously affected the budding friendship Jasper felt for the orange tabby.

  Keeping her grip on Jasper, Anica reached up and switched off the bedside lamp. Then she snuggled him close and sighed. “Thank you.”

  Jasper admitted it wasn’t horrible being nestled against Anica’s plump breasts. She seemed to need him there. He didn’t really care whether she did or not, of course, because he didn’t really care about her. Yet it seemed sort of mean to leave her alone when she was so upset.

  Slowly she began to scratch behind his ears and under his chin. “I just want to say what I didn’t get a chance to before you went into the bathroom. I want you to know, whatever happens, I’ll always treasure tonight.”

  Oh, shit. She was mixing up love and sex. He’d do well to remember that next time. If there was a next time. He’d like that, from a sexual satisfaction point of view, but it wasn’t like he needed to have her again.

  Anica kept scratching his chin, and although he didn’t want to, because it sent exactly the wrong message, he began to purr.

  Chapter 14

  Lily arrived at ten thirty the next morning to cat-sit for Jasper while Anica went to meet Dorcas and Ambrose at Wicked Brew. Lily was early. Lily was never early, which told Anica how much her sister was worried about the situation.

  The steady rain falling outside had prompted Lily to break out her favorite purple raincoat that reached to midthigh, the exact point where her boots stopped. Underneath she had on a short denim skirt and a tight red sweater.

  She shook the rain from her coat onto Anica’s carpet, stomped the water from her boots and propped her dripping black umbrella near the door. “You didn’t call last night. Does that mean he didn’t transform at all?”

  Anica glanced over toward the sofa, where Jasper and Orion each occupied an end. Jasper seemed to be sleeping, but she didn’t trust him not to be listening with both highly tuned cat ears. “Let me make you some coffee before I go.” She walked into the kitchen.

  Lily followed her and lowered her voice. “You didn’t want him to hear you, right?”

  “Right.” Anica fired up the electric coffee grinder. “We had sex.”

  “Sex?” Lily’s one-word exclamation would have carried over the sound of a jet engine, let alone a coffee grinder.

  Anica sighed and poured the ground coffee into the basket. “Yes, and now I’m sure he knows we’re talking about it.”

  “Sorry. But we’re sisters. He should expect we’d talk about it.”

  “I guess, but—”

  “Come on over here.” Lily put an arm around Anica and led her to the far end of the kitchen. She leaned in close, as if they were calling plays for the big game. “How long did he transform for?”

  “An hour.”

  “Wow. So the potion must have done something.” Lily glanced over her shoulder toward the living room and then huddled again with Anica. “At what point did he change back? Were you still—”

  “No. It was after. He’d gone into the bathroom and then . . .” Anica couldn’t revisit that moment without choking up. She’d thought she’d been prepared for it to happen, but after the way he’d touched her, kissed her, made such sweet love to her, the change had hit her hard.

  Lily gave her a fierce hug. “Poor An. Sounds rough.”

  Anica nodded.

  “Was it great, though? The sex?”

  “Yeah, it was great.”

  “Well done, sis. Now he might think twice before he goes after revenge.”

  “That’s what I thought before I made the decision to go to bed with him. But now . . . now I think he probably deserves to have
whatever revenge he wants. What I did was awful, Lil.”

  “Hey, let’s not forget why you did it, okay? You found out he was a lying scumbag who manipulates women into feeling sorry for him so they’ll agree to have sex.”

  Anica looked her sister in the eye and smiled. “Yeah, but it’s damn good sex.”

  Lily laughed. “Then I’m glad you had some.”

  “Me, too.” Then Anica was laughing with Lily, and it felt good. Not as good as sex with Jasper, but nice.

  Lily gave her another hug and released her. “You’d better get going. I don’t want you to be late for Dorcas and Ambrose.”

  “That would be bad after they drove all the way up here. Lily, I didn’t even think about this, but should I offer to pay them something?”

  “Nah, they’ll just ask for your firstborn child.”

  Anica gasped.

  “Not really! Honestly, you’re the most gullible person I know. No wonder Jasper could hoodwink you so easily.”

  “Seriously, should I pay them something? I mean, they’re taking their valuable time, and there’s gas to consider and meals, too. It’s not like any of that’s free.”

  “I think the Wizard Council takes care of their expenses.”

  The very thought of the Wizard Council made Anica quiver with dread. “That’s the point. I’ve asked Dorcas not to mention this to the council. I think I’d better offer to pay them.”

  “I’d wait to see what they have to say first.”

  “Okay.” Anica took a deep breath. “There’s something else I can’t handle by myself, but I hate to ask you.”

  “Go ahead. I love having you in my debt.”

  Anica rolled her eyes. “Never mind.”

  “Oh, come on. What is it?”

  “I still don’t have a protection spell on the apartment. I don’t think those particular fairies will be back, but I’d feel better if—”

  “Say no more. I’ll handle it this morning.”

  “Thank you. That relieves my mind.” Her sister could be wonderful sometimes.

  “By the way, you look terrific today. That blue sweater and skirt complement your orgasmic glow.”

  And she could also be a pain in the ass. “Stuff a sock in it, Lily.” Smirking at her sister, Anica left the kitchen and walked over to the closet to get her hooded black coat.

  “Oooh, some spunk!” Lily followed her. “Glad to see it. So, is everything fine here? Did you e-mail Jasper’s work again?”

  “I do it every morning.” Anica buttoned her coat. “He has some work-related things piling up, and I’m wondering if somebody needs to check his condo and collect the mail, but if Dorcas and Ambrose can solve this today, he’ll be able to handle it.”

  “Then again, having it take a little longer wouldn’t be so bad, would it?” Lily winked at her.

  “No comment. And thanks again for doing the spell.” Grabbing her purse, Anica left the apartment. She knew perfectly well that once Jasper was completely cured she’d never see him again.

  That might take place today. She hoped it would, even though that meant she’d never have sex with him again. If that consequence made her sad, she’d deal with it. Jasper’s return to human form was the only thing she’d allow herself to think about right now.

  Jasper watched Anica go out the door. He’d figured out that she was meeting her witch and wizard friends at Wicked Brew because he wasn’t supposed to be privy to what they said to each other. That ticked him off. He was the primary one involved, after all.

  But once again he wasn’t in control of his destiny. All he could do was stay curled up on this sofa and pretend to sleep, when inside he was a seething mass of worry. Another day had gone by, another day when he’d been AWOL at the office. Pickens, the nerd in the office next to his, had his eye on several of Jasper’s clients. If Jasper didn’t get back there soon Pickens might start stealing those clients out from under him.

  As he lay there picturing that unwelcome scenario, Lily came over carrying a steaming mug of coffee.

  She sat down beside him and adjusted her short skirt. “So, fuzz face, you made it with my sister last night, I hear.”

  Jasper kept his eyes closed, pretending to be asleep. He’d been irritated that Anica had told Lily about last night, even though her comment about how great the sex was had soothed him somewhat. Fortunately Anica hadn’t gone all mushy when she’d mentioned the incident. Maybe in the light of day she realized it was just sex and nothing else.

  “I’m glad you made her happy for a little while,” Lily said. “Because she’s headed to Wicked Brew to lay her reputation on the line for you.”

  Jasper thought that was only fair.

  “I’m sure you have a mental list of grievances longer than the line at the DMV, but I wonder if you’ve considered the advantages of being a cat?”

  Oh, sure. He’d especially loved the Shoumatoff incident.

  “Some people see their glass as half-empty, and I wonder if that fits you, Jasper. Let me show you that your glass is half full. For example, as Anica’s cat you don’t have to worry about paying a mortgage or buying groceries. Your food is provided free of charge. You have somewhere to live that’s warm in the winter and cool in the summer.”

  He hoped to God he wouldn’t be around to experience seasonal change in this apartment.

  “Anica makes sure you have a soft place to sleep and that your food dishes are always clean. And here’s a bonus. You have the flexibility to lick your balls. I would think an oversexed guy like you would love that to pieces.”

  If he could talk he’d let her know that contrary to what she might think, he had no interest in that activity.

  “Anyway, my big sis is worried that once you’re a man again, you’ll seek some kind of revenge against her for all your supposed injuries. I hope that’s not your plan.”

  He hadn’t decided yet. If Pickens had stolen some of his clients, then he was going to be pretty damned unhappy about it, and pretty damned unhappy with Anica.

  Lily sipped her coffee and leaned back against the sofa. “Just in case that is your plan, I need to let you know something. You go after my sister, and I’ll go after you. I’m a witch, too, and I don’t have nearly the scruples Anica has. And while you don’t know if she’ll get her magic back, I still have mine.”

  How dare she threaten him! Jasper slowly opened his eyes.

  Lily smiled. “Got your attention, didn’t I? I thought you were playing possum. Anyway, lover boy, you’d better do my sister right, whether we’re talking in the bedroom or elsewhere. You made some points yesterday when you led us to that mama cat. Very heroic.”

  He waited, because she obviously wasn’t finished.

  “But I’m not convinced that you won’t try something underhanded with Anica. I’m watching you.” She gave him the two-fingered watching signal.

  He was determined not to be intimidated. She’d cleaned up the destruction at Wicked Brew inside of fifteen minutes, which had been impressive. But she hadn’t been able to fix him, so he knew her powers were limited. Yeah, no doubt she was bluffing.

  “I sense you might not believe me. Let’s see if I can change your mind. Doggie, doggie, bold and bright, give this kitty cat a fright.” She snapped her fingers.

  A giant mixed-breed dog came boiling down the hallway, headed straight for Jasper. What the hell? Jasper leaped up, every hair on his body extended as he scrambled over the back of the sofa and fled for his life.

  The dog snapped at his heels and almost had him, but he made it to the top of the bookshelf just in time to avoid certain death. He crouched there, shaking, as the dog stood snarling below. Then Lily snapped her fingers again and the dog disappeared.

  Breathing hard, Jasper met her gaze. Maybe she wasn’t bluffing, after all.

  Soon after Anica stepped out on the sidewalk, the wind picked up and blew the rain sideways into her face. She adjusted her hood. When she’d been blessed with magic she’d never worried about arriving wet a
nd bedraggled. A quick spell and her hair and makeup had been restored to the way they’d looked when she’d left her apartment.

  She’d taken those magic powers for granted. Too bad it’d required a major screwup like this for her to realize how cocky she’d been about her well-ordered life. She dreaded seeing the condition of Wicked Brew. Although her employees cleaned reasonably well, she’d used magic every hour or so to make it white-glove spotless. But her spotless place of business, her spotless life, were no more.

  When she pushed open the door of Wicked Brew, she saw an ordinary coffee shop with ordinary spills on the tables, ordinary straw wrappers on the floor, ordinary sugar scattered on the counter. The place wasn’t dirty or in danger of failing a health inspection. But the magic was gone.

  The chaos she’d found after the fairy vandalism had been horrible, but this was almost worse because it hadn’t been caused by magic. Instead it had been caused by a lack of magic, and that broke her heart.

  She hated for Dorcas and Ambrose to see her shop in this condition, but then again, they wouldn’t know the difference. They’d never seen it the other way.

  Several of her regular customers called out to her as she walked in, and she returned their greetings with as much enthusiasm as she could muster. She picked up a couple of straw wrappers from the floor and threw them in the trash. If she’d had time, she would have grabbed a rag to wipe down the tables. Todd and Sally were busy filling orders behind the counter and couldn’t do it.

  But she wasn’t here to tidy up the place. She was here to meet a witch and wizard who had the experience she lacked to fix the mess she’d made of her life. Lily had given her a description of them, so they weren’t hard to spot. She saw them over at a corner table, sipping on lattes.

  They seemed like the sort of boomer couple who would live in Lakefront Towers and have season tickets to the symphony. Dorcas could be a head buyer for Nord-strom, and he could be the CEO of some innovative ad agency. They dressed in a style that never went out of date—sport jacket and turtleneck for him; cowl-necked sweater for her. He was graying at the temples, while Dorcas’s chin-length hair looked as if she’d just spent a few hours with a top Chicago stylist who understood all the secrets of color and cut.