I shrugged. “It’s fine. I don’t really know how she is. They would only let one of us go in to see Carly, and she’s been in there a while.”
“Mind if I wait with you? Carly was like a second mother to me.”
I nodded. “Sure. Take a seat.”
I sat back in the chair, casting my eyes over this guy, the one I’d lost my shit over. He was tall, with dark hair, chin covered in stubble. Dressed in black jeans and a white tank top, his leather jacket flung over his shoulder, he could have walked out of a modelling catalogue. He had a tattoo on his right shoulder that was distracting, and I couldn’t help but look at it. It was pretty, all swirls and flames. As if he had the sun on his skin.
I still wasn’t sure of him, but if Maddy cared about him that much, he had to be okay.
“I haven’t seen either of them for ages. How’s Maddy been?”
“Good. She’s pregnant. I’m just as worried about her right now as I am Carly.”
He nodded, grinning. “Congratulations. Maddy’s tough; she’ll get through it. She really fucking loves you too. That’ll help her.”
I cocked an eyebrow at him
Logan laughed. “Don’t worry. I kept an eye on her for a long time after we broke up because of all the shit with her father. Once I knew you had her back, I stayed away. She’s been a good friend to me—we just weren’t right together.”
I grinned. “Something works for us.”
“And you get to be a dad. That’s so cool.”
I looked up at the ceiling, worry coursing through my mind. Maddy had to be okay; Carly had to be okay. We all had to leave here together and well and not worry about anything else.
~
It must have been a good couple of hours before Maddy came back out, heading straight into my arms to cry on my shoulder.
“Hey, what’s going on? Are you okay?”
“She’s just so still. It’s so unlike her and I hate it.”
She looked up, turning her head towards Logan. “Hey.”
“Hey yourself. Bob let me know what happened. Andrew let me stay here and wait with him.”
“Thanks for coming.” I thought she might pull away from me, give her old friend a hug to welcome him, but she hung on around my neck, nestling into me.
I helped her to a seat, we sat together and I closed my eyes, resting my hand on her belly. She didn’t have much of a bump, but enough that we both knew it was there.
“I’m scared,” she whispered.
“I know, but whatever happens we’ll deal with it together. We don’t have to move; we can stay where we are and look after Carly. We can do whatever you want.”
She raised her head, meeting my gaze. I saw fear in her eyes, and I kissed her softly.
Out of the corner of my eye, I saw Logan stand and move towards us. He knelt before Maddy, placing his hands on her knees.
“Maddy, you need to take care of yourself, too. Any time you need to take a break or go home and rest, I’ll keep an eye on your mother. I’m not going anywhere until I know what’s going on with Carly.”
Maddy’s chest rose and fell faster and faster as she let out a sob, letting go of me long enough to throw her arms around Logan’s neck. He kissed her cheek before she let go and reattached herself to me. Any other time I might have felt a twinge of jealousy. But not now. Not with what was going on.
“You need to listen to Logan and not let the weight of this hang on you, baby,” I whispered. “Between the three of us, we got this.”
“I should have brought Bob with me. He’ll be out of his mind,” Logan said.
Maddy nodded. “Can you go and get him?”
“Anything you want, sweetheart.”
Logan stood, turning towards the door. “I’ll go get us some supplies too. Food and drinks to keep the pregnant lady healthy.”
Maddy let out a choked laugh. “He told you already?”
“Yeah, that man of yours is proud of you. It’s written all over his face.”
I grinned as Maddy turned her face to me, pressing her nose against mine. When we looked up, Logan was gone and it was just the two of us, waiting. Waiting.
CHAPTER TWENTY-SIX
The hours went by. Logan and Bob had returned, but Maddy had already disappeared back in with her mother. I hated that I couldn’t sit and hold her hand, but Carly’s care was paramount.
A gentle snoring sound from the corner told Logan and I that Bob was asleep.
“Lucky bastard.” Logan laughed. “Doubt I’ll get much sleep for a while.”
“You were really close. To Carly.”
He nodded. “Maddy and I went through school together. She was the first girlfriend I ever had. I loved that girl.”
“I’m glad she had you. Her father is such a shithead.”
Logan laughed. “Have you had a run in with him, then?”
“Yep. He ended up out cold on the floor. He hit her. She’s a grown woman and he hit her when she told him she had no money. I thought I’d lost her. She stopped breathing. I have never been so glad to know CPR in all my life.”
Logan’s expression told me he had no idea about that one, his jaw dropping. “Man, I had no idea.”
“I knew I couldn’t live without her. My first wife died of an asthma attack. I couldn’t do anything to save her. But I saved Maddy, and I’ll always be there for her.”
He nodded, his dark eyes full of emotion. “I’m glad she met the right one. I certainly wasn’t it.”
“How long did you two go out for?”
He shrugged. “Three or four years. It was crazy. We were too young, had no idea what we were doing, and probably should never have been together in the first place. After we dated for a while, I decided she’d be the first girl I was ever with. Turned out she didn’t want to wait and found someone else to be her first. I found that out after the fact. Loved her so much, we stayed together anyway. Pretty much destined for disaster.”
I nodded, and he clasped his hands together as if praying. “We just drifted apart. Not our friendship, that stayed, but the boyfriend-girlfriend thing, we weren’t so good at. So we called it quits before we screwed the friendship too.”
We both looked towards the room, where Maddy sat beside the bed.
“I never stood a chance,” I said. “She knew what she wanted and she went for it. Not that I resisted. What’s not to love, right?”
~
At the twenty-four hour mark, we convinced Maddy to come home with me for some sleep. Logan and Bob took turns sitting with Carly while we went back to the boarding house, settling in for a rest in Maddy’s room.
Despite insisting that she just wouldn’t be able to sleep, Maddy was out for the count almost as soon as her head hit the pillow. I lay beside her, my arm under her neck, my hand playing through her hair as I held her close.
When she rolled onto her side, I rolled with her into a spooning position. I rested my hand on her belly.
“Rest easy, my babies,” I whispered. Both of them needed the sleep. So did I, and I drifted off to sleep, snuggled up with my wife.
An intense stabbing pain in the arm woke me, and for a moment I wondered if I was having a heart attack. Opening my eyes, I saw Maddy, poking my bare arm with the nail of her index finger, like a damn talon.
“W ... What’s happened?” I stammered, forcing my eyes open.
“Nothing. We just slept for ages and I want to go back to the hospital.”
I focused my eyes, turning my head to look at the alarm clock.
“About six hours. I guess that’s enough.”
“Enough?” She began to breathe faster and faster.
“Maddy, calm down. You’ll hyperventilate and that’s no good for any of us. Let’s just shower and get changed before we go.”
She shook her head, frowning.
“Come on. You stand there and I’ll wash you. The last thing your mother would want is for you to get stressed about this. Not with the baby on the way.”
Her
shoulders slumped and she nodded, resigned to my logic.
“You’re right. I’m just really worried.”
“Have there been any missed calls? Has Logan or Bob tried to phone?”
“No.”
“Well, there you go. Let’s go and sort ourselves out and then get back to the hospital.”
Maddy nodded, tears welling in her eyes. I reached up to stroke her face. “Babe, they’ll call if anything happens. You know Carly’s in good hands—she couldn’t be anywhere better.”
She nodded and I climbed out of bed, going to the en suite bathroom and turning on the shower. I met her halfway, and took her hand as we went back in to strip off and get under the water.
I washed her down, scrubbing her back while she stood there under the water. All I could do was hope I eased the tension. Carly was the only family she had, other than me, and to lose her would be devastating.
Wrapping a towel around her, I led Maddy back to the bedroom and she let me dry her off. She stood in the centre of the room, naked and forlorn.
“Come on,” I said, handing her underwear and then slipping her shirt and skirt on over the top. I wrapped my arms around her, and she relaxed into my chest.
“I could go to sleep again,” she said.
“We can if you want to.”
Maddy shook her head. “I want to see Mum.”
“I know, baby. Let’s get going. But you tell me if you need to rest again. I’ll be keeping an eye on you.”
She looked up at me with the faintest of smiles. “You always do.”
“Someone has to,” I said, matching her smile. She beamed.
“I’m glad it’s you,” she whispered.
CHAPTER TWENTY-SEVEN
After forty-eight hours, Maddy breathed a sigh of relief. This was, of course the safe zone the doctors had spoke about, but from what I could see, Carly looked no better.
We’d managed to catch a few more hours’ sleep between the four of us, but we were all exhausted, not wanting to leave Carly alone for any time.
“Maddy, you need more rest,” I said. I was worried about her, too. She had large purple bags under her eyes, despite the sleep she’d grabbed.
“I’m fine.” It made me so mad that she was that stubborn, but I understood.
This was our third day in the hospital, and as she went to take a shift beside the bed, switching places with Logan, alarms began to go off, the sound of the medical equipment wailing as the doctors and nurses came running to Carly’s room.
“No,” Maddy whispered. She lurched forward, and I grabbed her, holding her back as she struggled against me.
"They have to do their job, baby," I said.
All we could do was watch, waiting outside the window as they tried their best to save her. First CPR, then the defibrillator—none of it seemed to work, the staff were frantic, raising their voices to call to each other. Maddy buried her face in my chest, and I wrapped my arm around her head to cover her ears. She shook as I held her close to me and when I looked up, the blinds were down as they continued to work on Carly.
“I’m scared,” Maddy said.
“Me too, babe. Let’s just sit down and wait for the doctor.”
She nodded. The truth was, I wanted to keep her off her feet. If I was exhausted, so was she.
We held each other up as we waited, Logan and Bob both sitting opposite us in silence. Waiting, waiting.
After what seemed like an eternity, the door opened, and the doctor walked out. He looked as tired as we were, but the blank look on his face wasn’t due to exhaustion, I knew that much.
Maddy jumped to her feet, her face filled with yearning. She appeared unable to see what I saw. Where I saw death, she saw hope.
“I’m so sorry,” was all I heard from his mouth. He said so many other things, but none of it meant anything. I held Maddy up until I couldn’t, helping her back into a chair and sitting beside her, our arms around each other as I comforted her.
Carly had had another heart attack and her body, already weakened by the first, just hadn’t coped. They’d worked on her for some time before deciding it was the end.
They let us in shortly afterward, and all of us gathered around the bed. Maddy was still in my arms, unable to cope with the situation and barely able to look at her mother. The hospital staff had cleared the tubes and machinery away. It was just Carly, asleep and at peace.
Slowly, Maddy reached out to touch her mother’s arm, letting out a sob. My heart broke for my wife, losing the person she loved most in the world apart from me. I knew what it was like to lose someone that close.
In the silence of the hospital room, I ached for her. I’d spend my whole life loving and cherishing her to try to fill the gap. My hand rested on the small bump in her belly, and I prayed this would give her the strength to keep going.
~
By the time I finally got Maddy out of the hospital, she fell asleep in the car. It was early evening; the darkness had descended enough for the streetlights to be on, and I took a glimpse of her as we travelled the road home again.
Logan and Bob were in the car behind us, and I was glad Logan had been there to take care of Bob. He was as distraught as Maddy. Carly had always been there for him, made sure he was okay, cared for him when no one else would.
The silence was comforting, but unbearable. I wanted to hear Maddy’s laughter, her cheery voice which lightened even the darkest night. Her irrepressible love for life had been dulled by the tragedy of the day.
She woke as we pulled up at the house, Logan swinging in behind us, and I went around the car and opened the door to help her out.
“I feel like I could sleep for a week,” she murmured.
“Then you should do. Everything else can wait.” I kissed her head, slipping my arm around her waist as I helped her inside.
We didn’t bother going up to my room, and opened up the rooms she had shared with her mother for so long, inviting Logan and Bob in to sit on the couch and have coffee with us.
Maddy lasted about five minutes before she left to go to bed, and the three of us sat with that awful silence for a while before Bob sighed.
“I don’t know what I’m going to do now,” he said. “What’s going to happen to this place?”
I shrugged. “I’m not sure. We’ll have to find out what Carly’s will says, I guess, and take it from there.”
Logan patted Bob on the back. “You can always come and work with me at the workshop. I could do with some help at times.”
"Thanks, Logan. We'll see. "
I smiled at him,
Logan held up his cup of coffee. “This would be so much better if it was a beer.”
I laughed. “If I had any, I’d get us all one.”
“This will have to do then. Cheers,” he said, raising his cup.
“For Carly,” I said, clinking mine with his. Bob grinned, and did the same. “Now, we just have to take care of Maddy, make sure she’s going to be okay.”
Logan nodded. “She’s stronger than she looks. It’s a blow, but if anyone can get through this, it’ll be Maddy.”
I took a sip of my coffee. He was right, but my biggest concern was the baby. Maddy was strong, but in a vulnerable state right now.
Maybe I needed to find her a distraction.
CHAPTER TWENTY-EIGHT
I found a distraction for Maddy. Looking for houses. It took us three months to find the perfect one, and she found a real bargain. The woman who owned it had been in some financial strife, left by a husband who had walked out on her and their children. My heart went out to her, and my guilt at finding such a bargain was tempered by the love I had for my own family. What it must be like for her starting again.
Carly had left the boarding house to Maddy, and she’d decided to put Bob in charge of the place. He’d learned a lot over the years with Carly and he had me to help him out with the business side of things. Rather than taking more people in, he’d run it as it was until they all moved out—no
one ever stayed that long—then we’d re-evaluate how things were. It would buy us a few months to worry about it at least, and keep a roof over Bob’s head.
The new house itself wasn’t much to look at. It was clean and tidy, inside and out. The garden was a little overgrown, but nothing I couldn’t take care of, with plenty of space to plant flowers for Maddy, and for our child to play.
For us, it was paradise and for the first time since Carly’s death, Maddy’s smile was genuine.
“This is for us?” she whispered, cuddling up to me. We stood at the front gate, looking at our new home.
“If you want it. Things will be tight for a while, but we can do it, Maddy.”
I placed my hand on her belly, just as our baby kicked. “Yes, little one, you two.”
Maddy rolled her eyes. “I swear, the way this baby moves, it’s like a monkey swinging in a tree.”
“Hello, little monkey,” I said, patting the bump.
She grinned, placing her hand over mine and leaning into me. My heart swelled at the thought of providing this home for them. My family.
There was a time I never thought I’d get to say those words.
We moved in before the month was out. Maddy was excited and couldn’t wait to get stuck into making the place ours.
Maddy was six months pregnant now, and blooming.
The outspoken, pushy, often scantily-clad young woman I’d fallen in love with had undergone a transformation during her pregnancy. She became more mature, thoughtful, such a sweet delight whose passion for me burned hotter than the sun in the middle of summer, drawing me in deeper than I thought possible.
This house was the icing on the cake.
On the first day, I’d moved the living room furniture around three times before she was happy. We didn’t even make it to the other rooms. She stood, one arm folded over the other, holding a finger to her mouth while she took in our surroundings.
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