Shared Secret

by Ed Bemand

  Maria checked the time. It was almost nine already.

  “I should be going soon. If I don’t get home and make dinner he’ll probably starve.”

  “It was lovely to meet you, Maria. Be sure to come back next week.”

  “Won’t Melanie be angry?”

  “She likes having something to get angry about. Anyway, we can always just leave them to it and come here.”

  Maria liked the sound of that. The wine was having a very pleasant effect on her.

  “What’s next week’s book?”

  “I’ve just finished it. Here, you can have my copy.” Camilla took the book from her bag and passed it over. Guts by Kurt Lang. This time the picture on the cover was of a fish that had been slit open so its insides were visible.

  “It looks depressing.”

  “The quote on the back calls it heart-warming.”

  “What about you?”

  “If endurance is what you need to know, it can teach you a lot.”

  “Thanks, I guess.”

  The kiss they shared was natural, an affectionate gesture between two new friends. The smell of Camilla’s perfume teased Maria’s nose pleasantly.

  She was sorry to leave, but it was better to cut short the pleasure than let it sour.

  Outside, in the dark street, the cold and drizzle made her realise just how softened her reactions had become. For a split second she imagined what it would be like to have another bottle of wine and find someone to fuck her, to hell with the consequences.

  It passed and it was 9pm and she had a husband waiting for her at home, doubtless relying on her to feed him. She liked her house and enjoyed being there usually. She also liked the idea of hot food and a comfy bed at the end of it all. She went home, making sure to jangle her keys noisily to try and give Alex some warning. She didn’t want to ruin her mood by having to listen to his clumsy excuses for being caught wanking.

  “Have fun?”

  “Yes... talking about books.”

  “I kinda assumed that. Did you know the book?”

  “No but it was okay. I was still able to get involved. I think I’ll go back next week.

  “How about you, been up to much?”

  “Not much, just watching TV.”

  She could guess what that was a euphemism for, but she didn’t really care. The TV wasn’t even on. Hopefully he’d got it out of his system.

  “Are you going to read the book for next week?”

  “Of course.” She meant it and she did try, but she found it really difficult to get into. There was always something better to do, often just watching TV.

  She couldn’t very well just leave the book lying around, the bookmark still stuck resolutely in the middle of the first chapter, so she got in the habit of moving it slowly through the book. How fast were people supposed to read? She wasn’t sure. She dreaded Alex asking her about it, expecting her to know what was going on in it. He didn’t ask. She had read the back at least a dozen times now,

  In this stirring tale of a woman’s courage against adversity, it was a bit dull sounding but at least it made sense so far, Ludmilla must struggle against the odds and survive. For forty years she works in a factory gutting fish, not letting pregnancy, injury or a string of miscarriages and a failed marriage discourage her. That just sounded awful. Why on earth would she want to read about something that was even more depressing than real life?

  Maria was early for the next meeting and sat for a while on her own in the café, nursing a coffee. She was glad when Camilla arrived before the rest of the group.

  “Did you read the book?”

  “I tried, but it was just so boring.”

  Camilla laughed.

  “And they already tell you how it’s going to end on the back. What’s the point? I get it, she’s going to keep on working in a factory for forty years, so why go through all the details of it?”

  “I suppose it’s fashionable. People find it reassuring to read about other people having an even worse time of it than they are.”

  “It’s just so depressing. Can’t we read about someone having fun for a change?”

  “You won’t like the next book.”

  “Not more fish guts?”

  “No, that’s different at least.”

  “How do you manage to read them all?”

  “I’ve got plenty of free time so I tend to read a lot.”

  “Don’t you have a TV?”

  Camilla laughed.

  “What sort of thing would you like to read?”

  “I don’t know, something where not everything that happens has to be bad.”

  “Hmm, let me see. I’m sure I can think of something appropriate.”

  “What?”

  “Come back to my place, we can look through some of my books and see if anything takes your fancy. Don’t worry, it’s not far. You can still be home in plenty of time.”

  Maria smiled.

  “I did warn him that I might be a bit late.”

  “Did you now. Just how late?”

  “I said he’d have to make his own dinner.”

  Camilla squeezed Maria’s hand affectionately.

  They went in Maria’s car. Camilla’s presence made Maria suddenly more aware of the fast food detritus and cosmetics that littered the interior of the vehicle.

  The house was larger than Camilla needed but well maintained. Maybe she still had enough of a domestic streak to clean it all with pleasure. Or a cleaning lady.

  “Now, let’s see. You wanted something less depressing to read.”

  “Nothing that claims to be inspiring. Something with a bit more action.”

  “What kind of action? Do you mean violence, or...”

  “Sex. Definitely sex.”

  “Definitely sex. Like that is it?”

  Maria did her best to hold Camilla’s gaze but she couldn’t stop herself from looking away. Camilla pondered the shelves for a few minutes then picked a book, which she drew from its fellows and handed to Maria. It was an old book, a hardback that had probably had a dust jacket once but hadn’t seen it for a while. The faded text on the spine said How She Became, by D.B. Kristoff.

  “What’s it about?”

  “Just read it.”

  “Right now?”

  “No. I’m sure we can find something better to do.”

  “Are you trying to seduce me?”

  “It’s only trying if it doesn’t work.”

  Maria turned and found that Camilla was standing much closer than she had thought. It was such a small movement to bring them closer and they were almost the same height so it would have taken a real, conscious effort for them to not kiss and once they were kissing, Maria just couldn’t want to stop doing it.

  Of course she wanted to feel Camilla’s body. It had been so long since she had felt a woman pressed passionately against her. Once they had started Maria could only be eager and willing. She was so hungry and it would have been rude to say no.

  Camilla kissed her again and then took her by the hand and led her to the bedroom. Clothes were pulled off, both of them yearning for them to be naked together.

  Camilla had the soft, full curves of an older woman. Age and the lingering effects of child-bearing didn’t diminish her beauty to Maria. If anything, Maria was almost embarrassed by her still youthful thinness and her firm, high breasts that had never suckled an infant.

  It hadn’t taken much for Camilla to get Maria into bed. Camilla felt no guilt about seducing a woman away from her husband. If anything she felt that people should be grateful that she was taking the time to offer this poor girl some enjoyment. Camilla considered herself a philanthropist more than a philanderer. Wasn’t it better this way? Maria wasn’t cheating on her husband, not really. Maybe if it was with a guy it would be cheating, but a little time spent with a woman like Camilla was different.

  Camilla knelt over Maria, bringing her pussy close to her face. Her hands braced against the wall she tightened her grip. Maria l
apped at her hungrily, relishing the taste, the missed familiarity of woman. As she drew closer, Camilla adjusted her position and reached back behind her with one hand. She stroked Maria’s wet pussy as she ground and thrust her own against Maria’s face. Their climax was screamed in unison.

  Next, Camilla lowered her face between Maria’s legs. Alex had never been an enthusiast of cunnilingus and it had been a year since he had paid her the attention that could bring her to her knees. Camilla took great pleasure in lavishing affection on Maria’s pussy. Why shouldn’t she? A beautiful girl needed pleasure and she was glad to have the opportunity to give her what she needed.

  They spent an exquisite hour with their bodies and limbs entwined, their pleasure all the sweeter for the realisation of its brevity. There was no point in them wasting a moment that deserved to be savoured.

  Maria could still taste Camilla on her tongue when she was driving home. The recollection it stirred made her squirm a little in her seat. It wasn’t fair, she’d have to wait all week for another chance to orgasm.

  Chapter 8 - Camilla enjoys herself

  Camilla was about fifty. She was a well-preserved, mature woman who exuded a kind of sophisticated femininity. She had resisted the temptation towards excess that so many women of her age who wish to still be thought of as sexual beings can succumb to. She could play the vamp when she wanted but she didn’t feel compelled to inhabit the role full-time.

  She enjoyed the freedom that came with being comfortably off without having to work terribly hard and free of obligations to others. Her children had long since flown the nest and she saw them only occasionally. She had successfully completed the full cycle of marriage and motherhood and still been young enough at its culmination to be able to enjoy herself.

  The book club was an idle pastime of hers. If nothing else it offered diversion and an excuse to meet new people in a usually convivial if well-behaved environment. She was too old to have any interest in going to nightclubs to find her pleasure. Anyway, many a respectable surface has been found to conceal most interesting depths and Camilla had made a preoccupation of exploring them.

  In Maria she saw a sweet, shy woman. Someone nice who just couldn’t get what she wanted out of the man she had chosen to marry. Doubtless he was a good man in many respects but in something as important as her satisfaction he just didn’t know how to offer her fulfilment.

  Camilla had given Maria a book to read as an alternative to the interminable inspirational worthiness that seemed to be popular at the time. The book was called How She Became. It was about a woman named Svetlana. She grew up in the country and moved to the city to find work. Her first job was in a factory, processing fish. Maria was a bit worried that it might turn out to be a rehash of the ghastliness that had been Guts but fortunately Svetlana didn’t spend very long in the factory.

  Maria was almost relieved when Svetlana found herself in an awkward position and was obliged to perform sexual favours for a man. Maria wasn’t stupid enough to imagine that she’d actually enjoy being forced into prostitution but just as so many women can’t help but harbour rape fantasies, however much they know that the reality would be traumatic, something about a man holding his cock out to her and just telling her to get on her knees and suck it excited her. It was enough to keep her reading, which was more than the other books had managed.

  Maria still wasn’t a big fan of reading, but at least this book had more happening in it. She read about the woman’s experiences working as a high class prostitute. It stirred something in her. Maria couldn’t help but sneak a hand into her trousers. She didn’t want to end up like Alex, wanking away every spare moment he had, but nor could she begrudge herself a little pleasure. Soon, she had put the book down to focus on touching herself. When she came, the book was forgotten and it was Camilla she was thinking about.

  Maria was purposefully early again for the book club meeting the following week. She was hoping that she could find Camilla and that they could sneak off together and spend a few hours enjoying each other’s body. Even the chaste kiss of greeting that Camilla gave her excited her. She was almost disappointed when Camilla wanted to talk about the book.

  “Did you like the book?”

  “It was a lot better than the last one, stuff actually happened in it.”

  “Yes, she does lead an eventful life. Did you finish it?”

  “Not quite. Would you like to go back to yours for a while?”

  “Actually I think we should stay for the meeting this week.”

  “Really, why? Wouldn’t you rather I licked you for a few hours?”

  Maria pleaded, reaching out to touch Camilla. Camilla pushed the hand away.

  “I already told you what we’re going to do.”

  “Please...”

  Camilla gave her a stern look. Maria shrank.

  “Sorry.”

  “I’ve bought you a little present.”

  It was a small box, tied with a ribbon. Maria untied it and lifted the lid. Inside was a slender, curved metal cylinder with a trailing wire. She lifted it out, guessing where it was supposed to go. It started to buzz softly in her hand. Camilla showed the small remote control that she was holding in her hand.

  “Nip to the loo and put it in.”

  How could Maria say no?

  It took her a few minutes to get the device settled inside her. She was blushing when she returned to Camilla, and found that others of the book group had arrived. Melanie was just entering the café.

  “Oh, it’s you, Camilla. And...” Melanie glanced at her notebook but she obviously didn’t have Maria’s name conveniently written down in front of her this time so she didn’t say it.

  “Hello Melanie. Don’t worry, I’ll behave.”

  “Yes. I’d hope so.”

  Camilla picked just that moment to touch the control, causing the device inside Maria to start buzzing. It caused Maria to cough out a short weird laugh that she couldn’t control. Melanie glared at her. Chastened, Maria looked down at the floor.

  “Now, has everyone read the book?” Melanie asked, getting down to business. People nodded and muttered confirmation. Not expecting to actually be at the meeting, Maria had no idea what the book even was. Camilla was better prepared and had a copy of it in her bag. She took it out now and Maria tried to steal a glance at it. The cover illustration was of heavy metal bars in shadow. Banged Up by Adrian Volter.

  “Would anyone like to tell the group what they thought about the book?”

  “I really like it.” Carol spoke up, her voice faltering. Silence followed the statement, as though the universe itself was expecting a more insightful comment from the speaker. It didn’t happen. She had said what she wanted to.

  “Yes. Thank you, Carol.”

  Camilla touched the control again, causing a sharp momentary rise in the intensity of the vibrations inside Maria. She held her hand against her mouth to smother her reaction. It didn’t work.

  “Perhaps you’d like to tell everyone what you thought about it....” Melanie glanced at her notebook again but found no further assistance.

  “Maria.” Camilla volunteered helpfully. Maria glared at her. Camilla smiled back and the vibrations intensified.

  “What did I think? Oh well... it was very moving, I suppose...” a sharp increase in the frequency made the last syllable have a strange, rising inflection. She coughed. “Very inspiring. How he endured, uh, everything that happened to him.” Maria stopped rambling.

  Melanie seemed to be already bored of having to listen to other people.

  “Yes, well, good. Of course, endurance is what can be seen as the defining trait of Adrian, one of the most multi-layered characters in modern literature.”

  “So true.” Camilla intoned solemnly.

  Melanie looked like she was about to rebuke Camilla, but couldn’t really.

  Maria was almost relieved when Melanie started to ramble in earnest. It meant that she was safe to ignore her and focus on the delicious sensation
s that Camilla was giving her.

  Melanie was expostulating her theories about just what it was that made Adrian such a critical hero for our times, but Maria wasn’t listening any more.

  Camilla knew enough to not leave the device on the same setting for long enough for the novelty of the sensation to fade entirely. She played with it a little, allowing brief surging pulses of intensity to keep it fresh and exciting. Before long Maria had her fingers in her mouth, biting down to keep from moaning with pleasure.

  Fortunately, Melanie was too wrapped up in her own opinions to notice and start asking Maria any difficult questions.

  When Maria started to climax she did her best to hide it but it was strong enough that she couldn’t stop the convulsive twitches that went through her body.

  Carol was looking at her oddly. Maria doubted that she could guess what was going on deep inside her.

  Camilla was watching Maria closely and she let the vibrations fade away to nothing, giving Maria time to get her breath back. Maria was relieved, not sure that she could handle more of the sensations without a break.

  Maria moved closer to Camilla so that she could talk without upsetting Melanie.

  “You can be so cruel.”

  “How can you say that, when I’ve just given you so much pleasure? Now shush, Melanie’s talking.”

  The vibrations were gone so Maria was forced to pay more attention to what was actually happening around her. It wasn’t very interesting. All of this droning on about the same bloody book that she hadn’t even read was just so boring. She was glad when Melanie got to the end of her notes.

  For the first time Maria was present for the end of a meeting and Melanie introducing their next book. Melanie was helpfully equipped with a carrier bag of copies.

  “Due to recent inconsistencies in attendance it’s difficult for me to know just how many copies will be needed. It would make things much simpler if people could just decide whether they are going to come or not and stick to it.”

  Maria could feel an air of accusation being directed at her but she didn’t really care. Camilla moved closer to her and whispered.