Shattered Souls (The Toren Series, Book 1)

by Lola StVil

  He walks over to the bar and says something to the bartender. She turns and opens a small fridge and hands him a vial of clear liquid. He brings it back to me.

  “Drink this,” he says.

  “What is it?” I ask. I unscrew the lid and pour it into my mouth.

  “It’s a potion to sober you up. Whatever you do next, you should be doing with a clear head.”

  I swallow. The liquid is ice cold and bitter, but it does the job. Suddenly, my head stops spinning and the warm glow goes away.

  “Thank you,” I say to Rage.

  He smiles despite himself.

  “Not just for the hangover remover. For everything.”

  “Anytime,” he says with a wink, and just like that he’s gone.

  ***

  I arrive back at the clinic with a plan. I plan to have an open, honest conversation with Lucas that will determine our fate. Now all I have to do is execute it, and the decision will be made.

  I stroll into the clinic with a newfound resolve to do the right thing. As I enter the foyer, I hear voices.

  “Sabrina seems to like you, man. Will you put a good word in for me?” RJ asks hopefully.

  “I don’t know, RJ. I don’t really like to get in the middle of other people’s love lives. It always has a way of coming back to bite me in the ass,” Ryder says sheepishly.

  “Man, that’s nonsense. She respects your opinion. And it’s not like you’re telling her to get with a serial killer or something. We were good together; you know that. Why wouldn’t you want her to be with me?”

  “You were good together for a while, but she’s broken your heart once. What’s to say she won’t do it again?”

  I cringe. How has Ryder still not told RJ what’s going on? The longer he leaves it, the harder it’s going to be for them to have any hope of saving their friendship.

  I hang back, staying out of sight. I don’t want to get dragged into this. I’m afraid that if I do, I’ll end up blurting out the truth. Even though I think RJ deserves the truth, he should hear it from Ryder, not me.

  “I’m willing to take that chance. You’re my best friend, Ryder. Will you do this for me or not?”

  Tell him!

  “Sure,” Ryder says.

  “I owe you one,” RJ says, clapping his hands together loudly with excitement.

  I wait until their footsteps have disappeared and enter the main body of the building. When I reach Parker’s room, I push the door open and peep in.

  Parker is still sedated.

  “You can’t put cheese in a volcano,” she blurts out.

  I giggle to myself, closing the door quietly behind me. If she were awake, I would have a reason to go in there, but as it is, I’d only be putting off the inevitable.

  I walk along to Lucas’s room. As I enter and catch sight of him, I feel the familiar sensation of butterflies in my tummy.

  “Hey, how do you feel?”

  “Better than I did. Whatever Anya gave me really seems to have done the trick.”

  Has it? Or is it just because he hasn’t been around me?

  “Come on, let’s go for a walk while Anya isn’t around.”

  “You’re breaking me out?” He grins as he gets up.

  “Just for a little while,” I say.

  We rush out of the back door and run around the corner. Once we are out of sight, we slow our pace, laughing at our not-so-daring escape mission.

  “You are so dead if Anya finds me gone,” Lucas laughs.

  “I’ll have to hold you hostage. She only gets her patient back if she spares me.” We laugh together.

  “In that case I’m not going back,” he says suggestively.

  “Until I drive you mad,” I say, only half kidding.

  We come to the end of the block and the road opens out onto a beach. In the middle of the afternoon, when the sun is shining, I imagine the beach would be full of life: children laughing and splashing in the sea, teenagers playing volleyball, and parents trying to soak up the sun in peace.

  Now, with evening fast falling, there’s a chill in the air, and we have the beach to ourselves except for a lone dog walker.

  I lead Lucas down the stone steps and plonk myself down in the sand. He sits down beside me.

  “So,” I say awkwardly, not really knowing where to start.

  “Before you give me your speech, I want you to know something. Those mixtures Anya gave me worked. I’m fine now. No headaches, nothing.”

  I wish I could believe him. I really want to, but Anya’s words are firmly etched into my brain. The effects will only lessen the symptoms short term. Long term, the only thing Lucas can do to save himself is to stay away from me.

  “You know what?” I ask.

  “What?” he responds, now curious.

  “We’re probably not that compatible anyway.”

  He laughs.

  “Yeah, maybe not. I don’t think I could ever fully trust someone who is so willing to hold me hostage and have their way with me until passion drives me mad.”

  “That’s not what I said,” I say, laughing dramatically.

  “But it’s what you meant.”

  “Exactly,” I say.

  “And I’m pretty high maintenance, you know,” I admit now that the laughter has died down.

  “You don’t say,” he jokes.

  I punch him playfully in the arm.

  “Hey, watch it,” I say.

  “Or what?” he asks.

  “Or you’ll be sorry,” I respond.

  I try to make it sound ominous, but fail miserably.

  “Okay,” I answer.

  He looks at me attentively, like he’s trying to read my soul.

  “Here’s my plan. We’re going to compare what we’d want to do on a first date, and that alone will show how completely incompatible we are.”

  He smirks.

  “Ladies first.”

  “And people say chivalry is dead.” I smirk.

  “So, firstly, you would have to pick me up on a white horse. Then you’d fly me to Paris and we’d wander arm in arm around the Louvre, followed by a moonlit walk along the riverbank. Oh, and I wouldn’t put out, and you would only get a goodnight kiss if you were lucky.”

  He laughs.

  “Well, you’d be right about us being bad together if any of that was true. But here’s what I think we’d really do. We’d pack a picnic and head down to Central Park. We’d find a secluded spot where we would be alone. And we’d nibble on sandwiches and wash it all down with a bottle of Coy Desire. No, scratch that. It’s you we’re talking about—Coy Courage flavor.”

  I can’t help but laugh.

  “Are you saying I’m not classy enough for wine?”

  “I’m saying I’ve never seen you drink wine before, so why start now?”

  It’s scary just how made for each other we are. He’s just described what would be literally my idea of a perfect first date. This isn’t going well.

  I sit and stare out at the sea, the silence between us comfortable, but intense.

  He breaks it with his next comment.

  “And you would so put out.”

  A laugh bubbles up and bursts out of me ungracefully. I can’t help it.

  “You’re pretty sure of yourself, aren’t you?” I ask with raised eyebrows.

  He nods. “I am. Because you wouldn’t be able to resist my charms.”

  “Is that so?”

  He nods again and turns to face me. “Yeah.”

  He pauses for a second.

  “Because I’d do this.”

  He reaches out and tucks a loose strand of hair behind my ear.

  “And this.”

  He looks deep into my eyes, moving his face towards mine. His lips are so close to mine I can almost feel them touch. I can hardly catch my breath. I want him so badly, I fear I might burst.

  “And then this.” He leans in to kiss me for real, but I can’t let that happen. No matter how much I want it, want him.

&n
bsp; “Lucas, stop,” I say firmly, pushing him away. I stand up and take a few steps back.

  “What? That wouldn’t work?” he says, stepping towards me with a twinkle in his eye.

  I have to be serious now. I cross my arms and look at him apologetically.

  “Or is it that you know it would, and you’re scared you can’t control yourself around me?”

  I can’t joke around anymore.

  “It’s because of the pain I know it will cause you.”

  “I don’t care,” he says, taking a step forward, reaching for me again.

  “But I do,” I say, stepping back quickly before my desire for him can overcome me and I do something that we will both end up regretting. My next words shatter us both.

  “I’m so sorry, Lucas—you’re off the team.”

  Book II

  Lucas Ford

  I lived a million lives, I would’ve felt a million feelings and I still would’ve fallen a million times for you.

  —Robert M. Drake

  CHAPTER THIRTEEN: CONTROL YOURSELF

  I’ve watched Summit for a long time, and I played this moment out in my head forever. And now that we are standing only inches apart, about to kiss…

  Damn, I never thought I could want someone this bad.

  I lean in towards her. Somewhere in the back of my mind, I know that this kiss could kill me. It’s literally the kiss of death, but at this moment I don’t care. A light ignites deep in my soul, a light I thought I lost a long time ago. My hands are shaking and unsteady as I reach out to caress her hair. I joke about her not being able to control herself around me, but I think we both know it’s I who won’t be able to control myself.

  Having Summit in my life has already changed so much, and it’s all for the better. Even with the blinding headaches, and the knowledge of what happens next, I would still choose her.

  Before she came into my life, things were so different. My father made sure I had my priorities right—training, more training, a bit more training, and following the rules. Mom always wanted Nix and me to have a “Normal” childhood, whatever that is.

  Did I mention training?

  At the time, it didn’t seem so bad. It was what I lived for. Being the future Kon gave my life purpose, but I knew I couldn’t just jump into the role. I had to be prepared because like my father before me and his father before him, and all the Kons in history, you had to be ready for any type of battle.

  But then I found out…

  I’m not going to think about that. Not now.

  I lost a lot of respect for my father, and our bond was broken that day. At the same time, it didn’t seem so important anymore. The only thing I have left is the Toren team. The team took my mind off the huge rift that grew between my father and me. Nix tried to fix things at first, but when I wouldn’t tell him exactly what happened, he let it go.

  It kind of set us apart as well. I don’t hate him or anything, but we certainly aren’t as close as we were when we were kids. Having the team pulled me through the darkness that surrounded me. Especially Nikki. She was my shining light: my hope, my salvation. I thought she was the most beautiful girl in the world. Things were great for a while. And the team welcomed her with open arms. But then I saw her. Summit.

  I remember the first moment I laid eyes on her. She walked out of a café with Milo, and they walked down the street laughing. I felt as though the whole world stopped turning for a second.

  I was everywhere and nowhere. I couldn’t take my eyes off her long purple-streaked hair. I wanted nothing more than to push my hands into it and kiss her. I watched the way her body moved as she walked, and it was all I could do to stop myself from going over and kissing her right there on the sidewalk.

  I could imagine how soft her lips would feel against mine, and I could almost taste her. She had me, and she didn’t even know it then.

  She laughed, leaning into Milo, and as she did, her whole face lit up. Her eyes sparkled. Those eyes! I knew in that moment everything changed. There was no going back. There was no help for me I needed her…BAD.

  And now, it’s about to happen. I close my eyes and lean in closer, about to make contact.

  “Lucas, stop,” she says firmly, pulling away.

  I freeze mid lean. She tells me she doesn’t want to cause me any pain.

  “I don’t care about that,” I tell her, reaching out for her again.

  It’s no lie. I don’t care. I would suffer a thousand headaches, each one more painful than the last, just to hold her in my arms.

  “But I do,” she says.

  She jumps up as if the sand beneath her has turned to red-hot lava. She backs up a step.

  “I’m so sorry, Lucas—you’re off the team,” she says.

  “Are you freaking kidding me?” I shout.

  I too get to my feet. She looks me in the eye and shakes her head sadly.

  “No. I’m dead serious. I have to be a leader, and a good leader doesn’t put her team at risk.”

  “A good leader knows she needs her full team. And she doesn’t let her personal feelings get in the way of that,” I counter.

  She looks down at the ground.

  “I’m sorry, I’ve made my decision. I hope that you’ll come to see that I did what I had to do.”

  She shifts uncomfortably from foot to foot. Suddenly, what she did hits me.

  “You planned this, didn’t you? You knew if we were alone together, something would happen. And then you could justify kicking me off the team. You manipulated me.”

  “No. It wasn’t like that,” she says, looking back at me.

  I raise my eyebrows angrily as if to call her bluff.

  “I wanted to know you could control it.”

  “Dammit, Summit, I don’t want to control it. And I don’t think you want me to either.”

  “Well then maybe we really are incompatible, because if you think I’d actually let you die…”

  She trails off. I know she thinks she’s doing this for me, but it’s the last thing I need. Being on the team is the only good thing I have in my life, and I can’t let her take it away. And the team needs me.

  I can tell by the cold resolve in her eyes and the stubborn set of her mouth that I won’t persuade her otherwise. I should hate her for doing this to me, but I don’t. If anything, it just makes me want her more.

  My mind races as I try to think of what I can say or do to get back on the team. She has no idea what she’s in for on this mission, and I know she can’t handle it with one team member short. It will get people killed.

  I settle on an idea. It’s not perfect, but it’s the best I have.

  “You know what?” I snap.

  She looks up but can’t bring herself to meet my eyes. She looks so small right now, but she’s still standing her ground.

  “You go off and play team leader. I’m going to fix this myself, and when I do, maybe I can get my family back.”

  I move past her, away from the beach and back up onto solid ground. I walk quickly, hoping she won’t catch up with me. I can hear her running behind me, so I run too.

  Away from the beach. Away from the clinic. Away from her.

  “Lucas! Wait!” she calls from behind me. “You need to go back to the clinic.”

  “I’m fine,” I shout back.

  I push myself, and I sprint. I know she won’t be able to keep up with me. What I’m about to do is dangerous, and I’m not pulling her into it with me.

  I can’t help but think of my father. I see him standing before me, shaking his head in disappointment.

  “You’re being reckless,” I hear his voice say in the back of my head.

  “No more than you would,” I think back. I slow back down to a light jog.

  I come to a stop when I’m convinced she will have given up even trying to follow me. I’m in an unfamiliar street. I look around trying to figure out my location. It’s no use. I have no idea where I am.

  I shrug. It doesn’t matter.

>   I pull my cell phone out and type out a quick text. I pace anxiously back and forth for a few minutes as I wait for a reply.

  My cell phone beeps in my hand, and I open the message. The response is short and to the point.

  Jemaa el-Fnaa, Marrakech

  I breathe a sigh of relief. I’d heard whispers that the Hun’s Market was back in business. The Collective had quietly brought it back into existence after it was destroyed.

  Of course they did—they’d welcome any chance to bring evil and chaos back into our world.

  The last time I’d heard of the market, it had been in Sophia, but it moves around. The council could close it down too easily if it remained in one place, and they would. Pretty much everything sold at the Hun’s Market has been expressly banned by the council.

  By moving around, they made the council’s job of tracking them down that much harder. The council usually had more pressing matters to deal with, and it seemed they could never locate the market in time.

  I guess that’s good news for me right now.

  I take off, and head to the place forbidden to angels.

  ***

  I land in a quiet, deserted souk about five minutes away from Jemaa el-Fnaa. The heat hits me almost instantly, and the closeness of the air makes me uncomfortable. I glance down. Jeans don’t exactly agree with the Moroccan climate.

  I can smell the spices in the air as I pass by stalls where the vendors prepare and sell delicious looking street food.

  I drag my eyes away from the food. What I’ve come for, money can’t buy, and I can’t allow myself to get distracted even for a moment.

  I stroll into Jemaa el-Fnaa.

  I am mesmerized for a moment by the sheer size of it. The whole square is overrun with stalls run by locals who call out various hooks to try and draw the tourists to their stalls.

  I see people of all ages, all sizes, and all nationalities browsing around. The place has an excited buzz hanging in the air. All shades of the rainbow clash in a cacophony of color, and my senses are assaulted in an almost pleasant way by the mixture of sights, sounds, and smells.

  I wander through the crowd.

  I can feel a dull ache starting in my head, but I’m not worried. It’s probably all the excitement and stress rather than the Drin coming back. Or that’s what I tell myself.