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CEO Daddy

Page 21

by Quinn, Taryn


  “He did, but he also never let me forget about the importance of leaving the Wainwright name behind when I’m gone.”

  “But if you’re leaving it behind to no one, how does that work?”

  “That’s the problem. I’m drowning in the business part without any of the love. All I remember is how my grandfather would beam when he talked about the newspaper. When he brought me to the printing room to show me how it all work. Ink forever stained his fingers, even when he wasn’t actually a newspaper man any longer. He loved being part of the stories.”

  I tipped my head against his shoulder. “When’s the last time you read the newspaper?”

  “Every issue.”

  “I mean, really read it.”

  He raked a hand through his hair.

  I pulled down his hand and laced our fingers under the table. “A long time?”

  “I honestly can’t remember when I’ve read more than the headlines I approved. I’m not the editor. We have one of those, and even he’s been going to Vincent more than to me.”

  “If you love it and want to get into the creation side again, that’s not a bad thing.”

  His hand tightened around mine. “I don’t.”

  “You know Bess only wants you to be happy. She’s not exactly the most traditional person, Asher.”

  “I know, but I feel like I’m letting everyone down. The more time I’m at work, the less time I’m here with Lily. The less time I’m here with you.” His voice was rough and low. “But then I’m here and I know I’m dropping the ball at work. Vincent has been taking on more duties and has so many ideas. Good ones that I’ve been ignoring.”

  I let him keep talking. It all came out in a rush. The plans Vincent had for expanding the brand into a monthly magazine instead of a weekly newspaper. Possibly moving from only paper media into podcasts and maybe even a news show, although that was farther in the future.

  I could hear the thrum of excitement under the guilt.

  I couldn’t disagree with Vincent’s ideas because that was the way I got world and entertainment updates. Various podcasts were the only reason I was remotely informed. It was the easiest way to consume information while I was cooking.

  Finally, Asher ran out of gas. “I can’t disappoint Gran. She’s done so much for me.”

  It wasn’t my place to tell him what to do. But knowing how much was on his shoulders made everything make so much more sense.

  “It guts me to think about telling her that I hate it. And I hate that I hate it. How can so much change in a few years?”

  I pulled his hand over to my middle. “Things can change in just a few months.”

  He gripped the still mostly flat expanse of my stomach, and I cupped both of mine over his. “It’s not selfish to want more than work. To want a legacy that includes a flesh and blood family. Talk to Bess. Talk to Vincent.”

  I turned into him and he curled his arms around my shoulders as if it was the most natural thing in the world. He held me so very tight. Almost too tightly, but I didn’t pull back.

  I needed some of his strength too. And while our little baby was coming freaking fast, I felt like I wasn’t alone for the first time.

  As if maybe we were building a legacy too.

  Twenty

  After a long Monday, I wasn’t any closer to a decision about Vincent.

  We hadn’t discussed anything other than the usual work things last week. Our overnight away at the trade show wrap-up had been more of the same. Somehow we’d come to an unspoken agreement not to speak about anything but that day’s agenda.

  Coming home to Hannah on Saturday had been both a blessing and a curse. I’d stopped at the gym on the way back because I’d been too full of anger and frustration. I didn’t want to bring any of that home to her and the baby. They didn’t deserve that.

  Yet I’d still snapped at her about stupid canned pasta.

  Over the past week, I’d probably let on more than I wanted to. She was an intuitive woman. And I wasn’t nearly as good at hiding my thoughts as I’d once believed.

  My poker face must have vanished right along with my supposed passion.

  I knew one thing. I had no problem feeling passionate toward Hannah, as our ice cream middle of the night date had proven quite well.

  Resisting that woman was proving to be hell on my libido. And my heart.

  Other niggles of interest were starting to take hold too. I didn’t know if opening up to her—or trying to, despite the freaking walls upon walls we both had around us—had unlocked some of the other juggernauts inside me, but I was becoming curious about things that had never fascinated me before.

  Like podcasts.

  Daly had mentioned that word in passing the other day, and it had been stuck in my head ever since. I’d done some research over the weekend when I’d been closed into my study at home, communicating with Hannah with notes and iPad videos because it was easier. Less sticky.

  Less likely to end up with us naked. We were both understandably wary about that.

  Perhaps Vincent was righter than I’d given him credit for. I’d felt more flickers of excitement from looking into what equipment doing a news podcast would require than I did about selling advertising and plotting media campaigns. By far.

  I hit replay on the video on my computer screen one more time. Before the picture came into focus, baby laughter filled my office. Despite the headache brewing behind my eyes, I couldn’t help smiling. Hannah clapped her hands and the laughter grew louder as Lily pumped her legs and smashed her hands gleefully in the bowl of applesauce Hannah had placed before her. A dollop landed on Hannah’s forehead and she sighed, still smiling. Her adoration for the baby was evident in every line of her face.

  As soon as it ended, I played it again. With every viewing, the tension in my shoulders and behind my eyes bled away.

  She’d started doing the videos by accident, I think. She’d tried to take a photo and had accidentally recorded a clip instead. Once she sent it to me, I’d asked for more. I liked seeing the record of their days together. There was no pressure for me, since I wasn’t there to mess things up.

  No, I was at work, messing things up here instead.

  My phone rang and I grabbed it without looking. “Wainwright.”

  “Snug, your favorite person is home.”

  I grinned. “All in one piece?”

  “Yes. How’s my Lily girl?”

  “She’s good. Teething we think, and on the verge of walking.” Another of Hannah’s video clips had shown Lily attempting another step. That one I’d received while running as if a serial killer was chasing me on the treadmill Sunday morning.

  My life might be fucked up, but I was in excellent cardiovascular shape.

  “And I have a surprise for you.”

  “Funny that.” I glanced back at the screen where I’d paused the video on a still of Hannah leaning over Lily’s high chair. Her sweater draped just right so that I could imagine what she would look like with a swollen belly.

  Soon enough, I’d know for real.

  I cleared my throat. “I have a surprise for you too, Gran.”

  “Oh, do you now? Is your surprise that you’re finally getting along with that sweet girl? She doesn’t know you only strike out like a bear when you have a burr in your paw.”

  With effort, I dragged my gaze away from Hannah. Her honey-colored hair had tumbled into her face and she was caught in a laugh, her dancing blue eyes alight. I loved seeing her happy. Moments like that had been far too rare between us. Other than the snowy afternoon we’d spent with Lily, I’d barely even seen her smile. I needed to change that.

  Just as soon as I broke the news to my grandmother that she was going to be that title twice over in a matter of months.

  “My paws are just fine. How was your trip?”

  “Don’t try to change the subject. I hope you’re doing better with Hannah. She’s a lovely woman, and she stepped up when we needed her most despite your bad attitude.�
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  “Yeah, about that—”

  “Hang on a second. Chris, can you grab that bag for me? Thank you, sweetness.”

  I frowned. “Chris? What happened to…Harry? Was that his name?”

  I hadn’t paid all that much attention once I’d ascertained that her last boyfriend seemed to be a decent guy. She never dated anyone questionable, so I dealt with most of her relationships the same way I did with the ones I wasn’t having—I buried myself in work.

  And now work wasn’t a refuge any longer. At least not for me.

  “Oh, Harry met someone in Virginia actually. Nice woman. Killer poker player. Do you know he won over a grand on our last hand the final night of the trip? I still think he cheated.” She laughed, her voice lacking rancor.

  “Wait a second. Harry left you for another woman and then took one thousand from you in cards? And you’re laughing? Also, since when do you bet that kind of money?”

  “We were on vacation,” she said as if that explained everything.

  “And that’s where you met Chris?”

  “Yes. He lost his wife last year and this was his first trip. He nearly aged out of the group, but they let him in, thank goodness.”

  I frowned. “Aged out? How can you be too old for a seniors’ group?”

  How old was this guy, anyway? Did he even still have teeth?

  “Not too old, too young. Let me talk to you later, Snug.” She turned the phone into her shoulder and had a hushed conversation with her younger man, ending it with a laugh before returning to the phone. “We’ll talk tonight, all right?”

  Gran hung up and I decided I’d dealt with enough insanity for one day. I didn’t have any more meetings, thank fuck, and I had gone to the gym this morning before heading in. The only thing left to do was for me to go home and help Hannah with Lily. She was probably overworking herself as usual, juggling far too much.

  As if cooking a vast menu for humans wasn’t enough, I’d seen scribblings in the margins of the Lily-related notebook we passed back and forth with recipes for dogs and cats.

  So much for her dropping that idea.

  So, if she wouldn’t ease off voluntarily, I would help her. It was a distraction from my own tangled business at the very least. And if I had ideas for her to scale up while economizing her efforts, well, she could take it as free advice. I tugged on my suit jacket and reached for my overcoat with a grin. Or set the kitchen on fire, which was just as likely when it came to Hannah Jacobs.

  On my way out the door, my phone buzzed with Vincent’s ringtone. I didn’t pick it up.

  Bitter? Nah. I was an expert at compartmentalism. I didn’t know how I wanted to deal with him yet, so I wasn’t.

  What I wasn’t doing was letting him go. The more I turned the situation around in my mind, pulling at corners and shoving them back into the puzzle, the more I wondered if the one who needed to go was me.

  I just didn’t know what that meant yet. What that would look like. And if I’d still be the man I thought I was on the other side.

  Blasting music on the drive home evened me out even more. I roared into my driveway with “Lola” by the Kinks screaming out the windows. I was singing along—badly—but I was enjoying it just the same.

  “Fuck.” I stopped the car, remembering that Lily was inside, possibly sleeping. I couldn’t remember the last time I’d played music that loudly, so it normally wasn’t a factor.

  I’d just stepped out of the car when Hannah burst out on the porch, her hair in a messy pile on her head. “What’s going on?”

  I looked around. I’d parked the car in my usual spot, and nothing appeared amiss in the glow from the motion sensor lights over the garage. At a loss, I checked my watch. It was past six-thirty, which wasn’t bad for me lately. I usually stayed at work far later than that.

  “I don’t know?”

  “You were playing music?” She rushed down the steps. “I heard it all the way up the block. Your windows were down in this weather?”

  Again, I glanced around. It was a clear, cool night with a scattering of stars just beginning to pop. The days were getting longer, but the nights still begun early around here. “It’s nice out.”

  “Nice? It can’t be more than forty.”

  I shrugged. I’d shed my overcoat in the car and was just in my suit jacket. “Feels nice to me. What are you doing?” She was crossing the driveway to me, her forehead pinched with worry.

  She didn’t reply, just leaned in close to sniff at my clothes. Then she pressed a cool hand to my suddenly warm forehead. It wasn’t only my face that was hot. All of me was on fire, just from her touch.

  Her eyes narrowed. “Are you feverish?”

  She didn’t follow it up with another question, but I heard it just the same. “Am I drunk?”

  She didn’t deny it, merely stepped back and crossed her arms over her chest. “Fine, if you want to put it out there. Are you?”

  “No. I haven’t had a drop. I’m not your father, Hannah.”

  The shutters came down over her eyes and I instantly regretted what I’d said. But what did she expect? I’d been drunk once in our acquaintance. So, just because I was singing and happy for one moment, she assumed the worst?

  She’s obviously dealt with plenty of worst in her life.

  She started to turn away until my fingers gently closed around her forearm. I drew her back against me, sliding my hand down to bracelet her wrist so I could feel the wild thud of her pulse. I brushed my mouth over her hair as I spoke, wanting the words to reach her where she’d already retreated. “I shouldn’t have said that. But you shouldn’t assume I was drinking because I did it once. One time, Hannah. I hadn’t had any alcohol in the better part of a year. Not even when Billy—”

  She shifted to gaze up at me, her eyes heavy and troubled in the thin shaft of light from the garage. “You were singing. Blaring music. What was I supposed to think?”

  “That maybe, just maybe, I was happy.”

  Her expression of puzzlement tore a laugh from my chest. I understood that look in my soul. “I don’t fully understand it either. A hell of a lot is messed up or in flux right now. But I left work today and I was in a good goddamn mood, even so.” I touched my thumb to the corner of her mouth. “I have to think that’s because of you.”

  Panic flared in her eyes before she glanced over her shoulder. “I have something on the stove. And Lily is—”

  I cupped her cheek and turned her face back to mine. “This will just take a second.”

  Slowly, so slowly, I drew her up on her tiptoes as my mouth touched hers. As gently as the wind ruffling the still bare branches of the trees, as carefully as I might’ve coaxed out a skittish deer. Pouring everything into the easy slide of my mouth over hers.

  Waiting forever to see if she’d respond in kind or shove me away.

  She made a frustrated noise in her throat and fisted her hand around my tie, choking me when she dragged me closer. I laughed and wrapped my arms around her, lifting her against me while the kiss went on and on.

  Dimly, I heard the sound of tires rolling over the pavement. Didn’t care. I nibbled Hannah’s lower lip and debated just carrying her inside to finish this on that sturdy bench in the front hall. Or I could just back into the car—

  “Asher.” Hannah pulled her mouth from mine with a ragged hiss of breath that made me swear. “Open your eyes.”

  I didn’t want to. I wanted to stay in this capsule of pure bliss. No worries, no thoughts, no pressure. Just this smart, beautiful, challenging woman in my arms and her warm mouth pressed to mine.

  “Asher.” Hannah’s voice edged with nerves as she shoved at my shoulder.

  “Dammit.” No matter how I tried to ignore reality, it always came back and knocked me on my ass.

  Or dug half-moons into my shoulder.

  Reluctantly, I dropped Hannah back to her feet and forced myself to turn toward the source of our disruption. They better have a damn good explanation—

 
And found my grandmother hanging out of her driver’s side window, positively cackling with glee.

  “Too late, I saw you. I saw you! About time too.” She whipped around my parked car and zoomed up the drive, nearly clipping the potted petunia I’d seen Hannah fussing with the other morning.

  “I think I better move that planter. It’s too close to the driveway for certain motorists.”

  “Asher,” Hannah hissed. “She saw us. She knows.”

  “That I can’t stay away from your mouth?” I shrugged and wiped my hand over my lips, already craving her cinnamon taste again.

  My preoccupation could be why I wasn’t flipping out my grandmother had witnessed a private moment I had not been ready for her to see.

  Better answer was that I was fucking glad she’d seen it. That at least one of the things I was holding back was now out in the open.

  No more pretending.

  No more denying.

  I glanced back at Hannah and noted that she was peering at me strangely again. “You swear you haven’t been drinking?”

  I moved closer to her and caressed her cheek with the tip of my finger. “Did you taste it on me?”

  Hannah flushed to the roots of her hair.

  I chuckled as I turned toward my grandmother as she hustled up the driveway with a large tote bag overflowing with packages. “Need some help?”

  She waved me off before dropping the bag at my feet to wrap me in a giant hug. When I hugged her back, she whispered, “You did good, Snug.”

  I started to argue that I hadn’t done anything—God knows Hannah and I were dancing around each other enough to wear out the carpet—but she’d already moved on to embrace Hannah. Hannah hugged her back and they spoke softly to each other for long enough that I frowned.

  Were they talking about me?

  I dipped my hands in my pockets and fisted them. Of course, they were.

  “I have to say that I’m relieved.” Gran stepped back and reached for her tote bag, frowning as I snatched it before she could.

  I grimaced. Jesus, this thing was heavy.

 

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