by Cox, Carrie;
The alcohol should have slowed down my desire. It usually had that effect on me and slowed my time to climax. But her hand on my cock felt so amazing, I was sure I wouldn’t last long at all.
My fingers fumbled at the zipper on her pants, and it wasn’t long before my fingers found their way to the wetness between her legs. My fingers slipped and slid between her legs as she squeezed me tighter.
I was so close already despite the whiskey. How was that possible?
Her fist tightened around my thickness, and I groaned. I wouldn’t last long now.
I quickly shifted my position, sliding Kristina’s pants down over her legs and then throwing them on the floor. I clutched her hips with my hands and lifted her on top of me.
I was so desperate for this that in my need, I forgot to be gentle.
I hooked my fingers around the white fabric of her panties, and in one movement, I ripped them out of the way.
Kristina’s eyes opened wide as she stared down at me and then she turned in shock to look at her ripped panties on the floor.
“I’ll get you new ones,” I said, pulling her hot wetness onto me.
She gave a little moan as she lowered herself onto me, inch by inch.
It felt so good. So right.
My hands cupped her sweet ass and squeezed the perfect roundness of her curves.
She moved on top of me, up and down, building tempo gradually.
I stared up at her, transfixed. I couldn’t keep my eyes off her tight, pink nipples and her amazing breasts. They jiggled with every movement she made.
I was so close now. I’d been trying to hold back, but it was no use. I used my fingers to rub circles around the small, hard nub of her clit and I was gratified to hear her moan in response.
She moved faster and faster until finally I felt her inner walls pulse around me, and I couldn’t hold back any longer. I groaned and felt the rush of pleasure as I released deep inside her.
19
Kristina
I’d left Jack sleeping off the effects of the whiskey in his bedroom and slipped out to sit in the sitting room, gazing out of the French windows.
I wasn’t sure how long I’d been sitting there. I had completely lost track of time. I was just brooding over the conversation I’d had with Jack earlier and wondering just how badly I’d screwed things up this time.
I only wanted to make him happy, so why did it feel like I was making things a million times worse?
I should never have let him use the simulator. I should have realized he wasn’t ready. To top it off, I then came home and told him that he is probably going to be able to race again.
I told him what he wanted to hear, what he wanted to believe in more than anything else in the world, because I was too scared of how he would react if I told him that he may never race again.
A few drops of rain had begun to fall on the window pane when the shrill sound of the telephone snapped me from my brooding. I jumped up and ran over to snatch up the phone before it could wake Jack.
“Hello?”
“Hi, this is Rita, Rita Volder. I’m calling to speak to Jack, please.”
“It’s not a good time,” I said, and I couldn’t help the coldness creeping into my voice. “He’s sleeping.”
But just as I spoke those words, Jack appeared in the bedroom doorway.
His hair was ruffled and his eyes look bleary from lack of sleep and too much alcohol.
“Who is it?”
“Rita.”
“I’ll take it.” Jack walked forward with his hand outstretched for the phone, and for some weird reason, I felt very reluctant to hand it over.
I’m pretty sure it wasn’t just because I was annoyed Rita had woken him from sleep. Reluctantly, I gave him the phone.
His whole demeanor seemed to change as he spoke to Rita. He was actually smiling. Why couldn’t I make him that happy?
Irritated, I stalked into the kitchen to make a cup of tea, although I thought it was going to take more than tea to calm me down this time.
Obviously, I could only hear one side of the conversation, but they were clearly talking about cars and the Grand Prix. The things that interested Jack most.
A horrible thought occurred to me. Even if Jack could never race again, if he was with Rita, he’d still be part of that life. He’d still be around the cars and the racing teams, and he would still get caught up in the excitement.
I turned away and filled the kettle. I knew I shouldn’t eavesdrop on their conversation, but I could hear Jack laughing behind me. She did make him happy, and every time I tried to, I managed to screw things up.
I knew I was feeling jealous. I’d never felt jealous of anyone before, perhaps because I’d never had anyone to be jealous over. It was a horrible, crawling sensation.
But despite my jealousy, I really wanted to do what was best for Jack. Loving him made me want to be a better person.
I guessed I’d always known that this thing between us couldn’t last, and I never wanted to stand in the way of a life that could make Jack genuinely happy. Perhaps Rita was the key to that life.
20
I could hear Jack talking about Volder racing. I finished making my tea and waved to Jack, motioning to him that I was going to take it into the other room. I wanted him to be able to talk to Rita freely. He looked up, and the way he smiled at me made me hold my breath. Even now, after spending months with him, he still took my breath away.
I slipped out of the room, cradling my tea, and walked along the corridor thinking that I would go to the kitchen and find Maria. I just wanted to be around someone normal for a while. I needed some normality, something routine to do to keep me busy and stop these thoughts racing around my head.
I often went to find Maria when Jack was busy. Sometimes I’d help her peel and chop vegetables, or knead the dough for her home-made bread. It was relaxing. And that was exactly what I needed to take my mind off the fact that Jack was talking to Rita and not me.
But before I reached the kitchen, I passed the main doors where Lauren was just emerging from the garden. Her hair was wet and water trickled down her face.
“You look like a drowned rat,” I said.
“Thank you very much.” Lauren gave me a sarcastic smirk. “It’s absolutely pouring down outside. I’ve just put the tools away. This is the kind of weather that makes me start to regret having an outdoor job.”
Lauren shrugged off her damp, red plaid shirt, revealing her skimpy white camisole underneath. I picked up her wet shirt as she kicked off her big gardening boots.
“I take it you’re done for the day,” I said.
She nodded. “Yes, with your help I finished earlier than planned. There’s no way I’m going back out there today even if I hadn’t finished planting.” She pushed her wet hair back from her face. “Where is Jack? Is he okay?”
I nodded. “He is fine. He’s on the phone at the moment so I thought I’d give him a little privacy.”
“You know, I’ve been thinking,” Lauren said. “We have hardly seen any of Monaco since we’ve been here. I’ve been busy with the gardens and you’ve been busy with Jack. We’ve hardly left the house. We should make more of an effort to get out and do the tourist thing. We should see as much as we can while we’re here.”
Lauren was right. To be truthful, I was feeling that spending all my time with Jack wasn’t healthy. My life at the moment seemed to revolve around him. I had nothing else to occupy myself with while I was there, and I knew I was in danger of becoming obsessed. It was my personality type.
“Do you fancy going out tonight?” Lauren asked.
Maybe I should have said yes, but I shook my head. “I’m not sure I should leave Jack. Not after today.”
Lauren chewed her lower lip, then said, “I understand. Do you think he was really going to…?”
I shook my head. “No. I don’t think so. He said that wasn’t his intention, but I’d still rather stick around here tonight.”
&n
bsp; “Why don’t we share a bottle of wine and watch a movie or something. That would be the best of both worlds. We could stay around here, but still have some girl time.”
I grinned. “Sounds good.”
We walked upstairs. I carried Lauren’s soaking wet shirt, and she scooped up her soggy boots and shoved them in a plastic bag so they wouldn’t drip on the carpets. I put Lauren’s wet shirt in her washing basket, and she headed for the shower.
I left Lauren singing in the shower, and went to tell Jack about my plans for the evening. When I entered the sitting room my mouth gaped open. I couldn’t believe it. He was still on the phone to Rita. Their conversation had been going for more than twenty minutes.
I tried to hide my annoyance and quickly scribbled down a note on the telephone pad and handed it to Jack. He barely glanced at it before nodding and smiling at me in a dismissive way. I was worried that he might be upset if I spent an evening away from him. Especially, this evening after what had happened today. But he clearly wasn’t.
In a huff, I stalked off to the kitchen to ask Maria for the number of a pizza delivery service. I was pretty sure that Jack would choose not to eat dinner with Alexander tonight, and I really wasn’t in the mood for an awkward dinner with Alexander shooting daggers at me all night.
After Lauren and I had shared our pizza, we went up to Lauren’s room where we connected the iPad up to the television and poured ourselves large glasses of red wine. We barely watched the film, which was some chick flick, romantic comedy. Instead, we just focused on what was most important to us at the time and ended up spending most of the evening talking about Jack and Alexander.
By the time the film had ended and Lauren and I had finished putting the world to rights, it was eleven p.m. Lauren had to be up early for a delivery of plants the next day, so I was about to head to my own room and collapse into bed after the long stressful day, when I remembered that I had left my cell phone in Jack’s sitting-room. Wearily, I yawned as I headed downstairs to collect my phone. I was pretty sure Jack would already be asleep, but I’d sleep better if I checked up on him and made sure everything was okay. I’d spent so much time with him over the last few weeks that it felt strange being apart from him even for just one evening. Lauren was right. I was definitely getting a little too dependent on Jack.
I let myself into Jack’s wing quietly. I opened the door of the sitting room slowly as it had a tendency to creak. I didn’t want to disturb Jack if he was already asleep. With the increase in intensity of Jack’s workouts over the past month coupled with his insomnia, he often tried to go to bed early these days. He needed all the sleep he could get.
But when I peeked inside the sitting room I stopped in shock, my mouth hanging open. In front of me, sitting companionably on the sofa, were Jack and Rita Volder.
What the hell was she doing here at this time of night?
They both looked up when I took a step forward.
“Hey, Kristina,” Jack said. “Did you enjoy the movie?”
I blinked a couple of times. My brain wasn’t really processing anything other than the fact the Rita Volder was now sitting only a couple of inches away from Jack. She was smiling brightly at me as if there was nothing wrong with this scenario.
I ran a hand through my hair, trying to get a grip on myself. I was overreacting. They were only talking.
“Hi, it was okay.” I managed to say the words without my voice breaking. I carried on trying to keep my tone cheerful. “I’m sorry to interrupt you two. But I left my phone in here earlier.”
Brisk and business like, I headed towards the coffee table and scooped up my cell phone. Then I turned to leave.
“I’ll leave you to it.”
I knew my voice sounded a little brittle and odd. I couldn’t help it. I was doing my best to act normally.
“Don’t go on my account,” Rita said. “I’ve stayed far too long as it is. I only popped by to drop off a few papers for Jack.”
Rita stood up and stacked up the pile of glossy brochures by her feet. She put her hand on Jack’s shoulder. “Don’t forget what I said, Jack. If you want to talk anything over, you can call me any time.”
I felt myself bristle with annoyance. I couldn’t help thinking how perfect they would be together. They had so much in common. I glanced down at the pile of brochures and saw that the one on top was about Volder racing. Did she want Jack as her new driver? I felt panic start to rise up inside me. Jack wasn’t ready for anything like that yet.
Rita picked up her purse. “I’ll see you later,” she said.
“It’s been great to see you, Rita.”
I tried to keep the cheerful smile on my face. “Why don’t I show you out?”
Both Jack and Rita seemed surprised, but Rita shrugged and said, “Sure.”
Jack seemed happy enough to let us go. I walked Rita out of Jack’s wing and I didn’t say anything until we were safely in the corridor of the main house and out of earshot.
“Do you mind me asking why you came here tonight?” I asked.
Rita gave a puzzled frown and I thought for a moment she might tell me it was none of my business. But eventually she gave a tight smile and tucked a lock of hair behind her ear.
“I’m leaving Monaco in a couple of days. We’ve got the next race coming up in Europe and I’ve got a lot of preparation to do. I wanted to see Jack before I went.”
I nodded. That was the answer I’d expected to hear. But the answer I really wanted was to find out why that brochure had been given to Jack.
“Look,” I said, stopping abruptly in the corridor and turning to face Rita. “I’ve been with Jack for a while now, and I really care about what happens to him.”
Rita frowned but she didn’t say anything and waited for me to continue.
“The thing is, I know that Jack wants to race again.”
Rita smiled broadly at me. “I know. Isn’t that fantastic? In fact, that’s one of the reasons I came here tonight. I wanted to give him all the information on the new car for next season.”
I swallowed. “Are you considering using Jack as your driver for next season?”
“I can’t really discuss that with you,” Rita said, immediately clamming up. “It’s up to Jack if he wants to talk it through with you, but on my side, negotiations have to be kept confidential.”
I felt a shiver of unease pass through me as she turned and continued to walk along the corridor. I had to walk quickly to catch up.
I reached Rita as she stood at the front door with her hand on the handle. I reached out and grabbed her forearm to stop her leaving.
“Wait! There’s something you should know,” I said, not knowing if what I was about to say could ruin Jack’s career.
Rita turned to me with a perplexed frown on her face. “And what is that?” she asked.
“I know that Jack wants to race again. More than anything else, he wants to get back to it. But he’s not quite ready yet,” I said. I couldn’t shake the horrible feeling I was betraying Jack and that was the last thing I wanted to do. But I couldn’t just stand by and watch him get into something he wasn’t ready for.
“He has tried to get back into it,” I said the words slowly, hoping I wasn’t doing the wrong thing by telling Rita. “He tried the simulator with Dominic O’Brien. It didn’t work out well.”
I didn’t want to get into the gory details. Rita didn’t need to know about Jack’s panic attack, but I did want her to appreciate that Jack needed more time.
“Oh, that,” Rita said smiling. “He told me all about it. And to be honest, I was surprised that Dominic had thought of such a thing. Imagine putting someone who’s been traumatized after a crash into an enclosed simulator.” She shook her head. “There was no external light, no sound. I mean, it was hardly a surprising outcome.”
She must have seen the panic on my face because her expression took on a more sympathetic look. “I know you care about Jack. I can’t tell you where we are at the moment regarding th
e state of our negotiations, but what I can tell you is that we are not going to push Jack to do anything he’s not ready for. I promise you that.”
I managed to nod. I was still reeling from the fact Jack had confided in Rita about the simulator incident.
“We can just take it one step at a time, Kristina,” she said. “Jack is lucky to have someone like you looking after him.”
I tried to smile at her, but I couldn’t help thinking that she was wrong. I wasn’t the best person to be looking after Jack.
After Rita left, I figured I would brood all night, worrying about Jack. It had been one hell of a day.
But I didn’t get a chance to brood.
Something happened that blew everything else out of the water.
21
I had gone upstairs to change and get ready for bed. I was pulling on my oversized, baggy nightshirt when there was a soft knock at my bedroom door.
My first thought was that it might be Jack. I suppose that was what I was hoping for, but when I opened the door, I saw Maria, the housekeeper, standing there.
She had her hands in front of her, clasped together tightly. I saw the tension around her eyes.
“What’s wrong?” I asked. “Has something happened to Jack?”
Maria shook her head. “No. I’m sorry to disturb you, Kristina. I know it’s late, but there’s a phone call for you, and it sounds important.”
“A phone call for me?” I repeated stupidly.
Maria nodded. “Yes.”
She wouldn’t hold eye contact. This had to be bad. I padded outside my bedroom barefoot to follow Maria downstairs. There was no phone in my room, in fact, the only landline telephones I’d seen were the one downstairs in the hall, or the one in Alexander’s office, so I turned as if we were going downstairs, but Maria caught my arm.
“This way. You can use the upstairs extension.”
