Senseless Sensibilities

by K. L. O'Keefe

  This is Anne Fremont, the woman I adore. The woman I vowed to be with.

  The thought alone was nearly enough to send him over the edge. He never thought it could be as good as this. Never.

  They lost themselves in the throes of passion, and when it was all over, they made love a second time. The night gave way to dawn, and Nicholas held her body, tired and damp, in his arms. He covered her shoulder with kisses and sighed against her hair.

  “I never want to lose you,” he spoke to her. “Never. Never.”

  “And I don’t want to lose you,” she said, touching his cheek with her hand. Anne couldn’t believe how important he was to her. Only a short time had passed, but Nicholas Grey had become necessary to her survival. She couldn’t imagine her world—and her life—without him. She needed him so much, and it scared her out of her wits.

  Anne closed her eyes as tightly as she could. Suddenly, her heart was filled with devastation and emptiness. How long would it last? Now that he’d had her, how long would his infatuation last with an old, desperate widow?

  Anne buried her face against his chest, nestling herself in the comfort of his arms. For now, she didn’t want to know. She just wanted to enjoy the moment.

  Chapter Twenty Three

  The next time Evangeline ran into Eldrinn Fairweather, he was a perfect gentleman. In fact, he was such a gentleman, Evangeline wondered if she had been too quick to condemn him. Every man should be allowed one mishap, should he not?

  When she saw him coming down the hallway, she was tempted to walk in the opposite direction. But Eldrinn greeted her politely, and complimented her on the style of her hair. He offered her his arm, and they went for a walk around the lake. He was completely genteel, and made an effort to talk about topics that interested her. That same day, Evangeline made arrangements to meet Mr. Fairweather in the drawing room. They sat at the pianoforte together, while her mama listened to the music. His poor musical skills made her laugh until there were tears in her eyes.

  All in all, Evangeline was having a wonderful day. It was a stark contrast to the other day, when Eldrinn attempted to grope her at the picnic. He was a changed man, completely and utterly charming. She wondered if she should try to forget the man who tried to reach under her dress. Maybe he was marriage material after all?

  Evangeline was thinking so much about Eldrinn—and a little bit about Jonathan—that she was having a difficult time falling asleep at night. Just before midnight, she crept out of the bed and went to the library, hoping to find a good book to lull her to sleep.

  It wouldn’t have surprised her if she found Jonathan Winters in the library, as it seemed to be one of his favorite places. But Mr. Fairweather? When she walked through the door, she was greeted by the unexpected sight of Eldrinn’s smiling face. It was bad enough to be wandering around in her nightrail in the middle of the night. It was even worse to be alone in a room with a man like Eldrinn, who was leering at her like a thief in a treasure trove.

  At first, Evangeline wasn’t alarmed. He was a gentleman, was he not? She would exchange pleasantries, pick her book, and take her leave.

  “Oh, Mr. Fairweather…” She started to sidle her way around the room as she spoke to him. “What are you doing here in the library?”

  “Not much,” he confessed.

  “Do you sit in the library for fun?”

  “It passes the time.” He let out a slight chuckle. “No, I’m not here for any particular purpose. I think I’m here for the same reason as you. I was looking for a book.”

  “Really?” Evangeline kept an eye on him as she sifted through a wall of books. Not a single title caught her eye. “I wouldn’t think you’d be much of a reader, Mr. Fairweather.”

  “On the contrary, I read all the time,” he corrected her. “Books are my favorite thing in the world… aside from women, of course.”

  “Oh, dear. I really wish you hadn’t said that.” She plucked a book from the wall, not even reading the title. She wanted to leave this awkward situation as quickly as possible. In her flimsy night garment, she felt nearly naked. His prying eyes weren’t helping matters. His eyes were a cold, cobalt blue, and she shivered when she made contact with them.

  “Why is that?”

  “You make me feel… anxious.”

  “Why would you feel anxious, my dear Lady Evangeline?” He took a few steps in her direction, narrowing the distance between them. “Do I make you feel… tense?”

  Clutching her book to her chest, Evangeline started for the door. “Y-yes. I suppose so.”

  “What have I done to make you feel that way?”

  “It’s not you, Mr. Fairweather. It’s this situation. It’s late, and I’m wearing my bedclothes.”

  “I happen to think you look very fetching in your bedclothes.”

  Every time he took a step forward, Evangeline took a step backward. “Thank you, I suppose.”

  “I bet you’d look very fetching out of your bedclothes, too.”

  “Mr. Fairweather!” She sounded as alarmed as she looked. “You shouldn’t say something like that… unless you intend to marry me!”

  “I would marry you tomorrow, if I had to,” Eldrinn said, his voice deep and husky, “but I would rather have you tonight.”

  When Evangeline ran for the door, Eldrinn reached out and grabbed her arm. When he did, the book she was carrying fell to the floor.

  “Mr. Fairweather, stop!” She yanked her arm away and bent to pick up the book. “I really wish you would discontinue this behavior! You were a gentleman this morning. I don’t know what happened to make you change so drastically!”

  “The vision of you in your nightgown... it must have stirred a mad passion within me.”

  “Then close your eyes,” Evangeline grumbled, reaching for the door a second time.

  Eldrinn pressed his hand against the door, halting her exit. “Please, don’t go. I’d like to have a word with you.”

  “I think you’ve said more than enough.”

  “You look so pretty when you’re angry,” he said. “Your little eyebrows draw together, and your nose gets all wrinkled…”

  “Please, move.”

  Eldrinn didn’t move. He held the door and leaned toward her, resting his chin on her shoulder. “You know, I’ve never failed at wooing a woman. I’ve always gotten what I wanted.” He plucked a tendril of hair from her shoulder and held it between his fingers. “And I’ve never met a woman more beautiful or more desirable than you. You’re so innocent, yet you have this undeniable fire in you.”

  She turned away from him. “If you don’t let me leave, I’ll--”

  “You’ll what? You’ll kiss me? You’ll pound me on the head with your book?”

  Evangeline raised her chin in defiance. “No. I’ll call for help!”

  “You know what I think? I think you’re playing a wicked game with me, little girl. I think you want me as much as I want you. I can see it in your eyes. You want to be pursued.”

  “Mr. Fairweather, I want to return to my room. I assure you, that’s all I want.”

  “Assuming I’m right...assuming you do want me...I feel it’s my duty to act accordingly.” His arm curled around her waist, making her shriek. “I’ll do it for both of our sakes.”

  With that, Eldrinn mashed his lips against hers. He didn’t even mind that she was slapping and biting him. The more she resisted, the more it provoked him. Even the taste of his own blood was fuel to his fire. Evangeline tried to hit him with her book, but he wrestled it from her hand and tossed it across the room. He slid his other arm around her knees and lifted her from the floor.

  As he hoisted her from the ground, Evangeline yelled, “Eldrinn, stop! Please!”

  He didn’t care about her protests. He carried her to the nearest table and laid her on top of it. His hand dove under her nightgown and cradled her inner thigh. Far from helpless, Evangeline tried to crush his hand between her knees. Wincing, he withdrew his hand and moved on top of the table, cover
ing her body with his.

  She tried to push on his chest, but he wouldn’t budge. When he eased the nightgown from her shoulder, her mind was in a panic. She screamed, but Eldrinn was fast. He clapped a hand over her mouth, muffling the sound.

  “Be quiet, girl,” he barked at her, “Everyone’s asleep. You don’t want to wake them up, do you?” Eldrinn chuckled. “Come on. Be a good girl and try to enjoy what I’m going to offer.”

  She tried to twist her head away from his hand, but he was too strong. She tried to pummel him with her fists, but he was too large to be affected. As he began to pull the nightgown off her shoulders, there was nothing she could do. He pulled the garment off the squirming girl’s body, until she was naked from the waist up.

  He lowered his head to kiss her breast, and there was nothing she could do but cry and moan, her screams lost in his silencing hand. He had her pinned and terrified. The more she tried to fight, the more frustrated she became. She wanted to save herself, but she couldn’t.

  “Your skin’s so soft. You taste wonderful,” he murmured against her skin. “You taste like milk and honey and--”

  Eldrinn didn’t have time to complete his description. He was being pulled backward by the scruff of his shirt—off of the table, and off of Evangeline’s shrieking form.

  When Eldrinn turned around the face the source of the interruption, a fist connected with his jaw. He sailed to the floor, hitting his head on the edge of the table as he fell. Just like that, he was unconscious.

  Clutching her arms to her chest, Evangeline rose to the table. She had never been so happy to see Jonathan Winters in her entire life. The valet stood over her felled assailant, clenching and unclenching the hand he had used to render Eldrinn unconscious.

  “He should be glad that wasn’t my good arm,” Jonathan quipped, resisting the temptation to do further damage to the fallen man. He saw Evangeline in the corner of his eye, tugging on her nightgown, trying to regain her stolen modesty. She had one hand covering her face, but he could hear her sniffling. “Evangeline, I'm so sorry. Please don’t cry.” He moved to the table and knelt beside her. “Come on. Let me take you back to your room…”

  Evangeline didn’t uncover her face. After her embarrassing encounter with Eldrinn, she didn’t want to look at Jonathan. She couldn’t look at him. She was grateful for having been saved, but she was still humiliated. What if he thought she’d done something to encourage Eldrinn’s advances? If Jonathan thought she was capable of that, she didn’t think she could ever look at him again.

  Jonathan held out his hand to her, which she stared at through her parted fingers. “I-I didn’t mean for this to happen, Jonathan.”

  “Of course you didn’t, dear.”

  “I just w-wanted to get a b-book.”

  “Is that the book over there?” Jonathan asked, referring to the book that Eldrinn had tossed. When she nodded, he quickly went to retrieve it. “Come on, Miss Fremont. Let me take you back to your bedchamber, and then I must talk to Nic—my master.”

  Evangeline sobbed into her hand. She hated everything. She hated herself. She hated Eldrinn Fairweather. She hated how Jonathan kept using the strictest formalities. She wished, deep down, that he would take her into his arms and comfort her.

  “Please don’t cry,” Jonathan whispered to her, his voice gentle and calming. “I’d give you a handkerchief, if I had one.”

  She chuckled into her hand. If she didn’t laugh, Evangeline was afraid she’d cry some more.

  “Let’s leave this room. The sooner we get out of here, the sooner I can find a way to dispose of this villain.” Jonathan nodded in the direction of Eldrinn, who was still knocked out cold.

  Evangeline slid off the table and took Jonathan’s hand. He carried her book under his other arm, as he had no other hand to hold it.

  “Do you really have to tell Nicholas about this?” Evangeline asked. As he led her into the hall, she clung to him as closely as possible. “I… I don’t want people to know.”

  “I think it’s best if he knows, and I think it’s best if Eldrinn Fairweather leaves this place as soon as possible,” Jonathan replied. “Don’t worry. I won’t tell him all the details.”

  Evangeline’s stomach churned. Jonathan knew all the details. He was the last person on earth Evangeline would want to know all the details. He’d seen her in a state of undress, pinned under the body of another man. She shuddered to think of Jonathan’s opinion of her.

  When they arrived at her room, Jonathan opened the door for her. He expected her to go inside, she didn’t let go of his arm. She was clutching it as tightly as ever.

  “There’s something I must see to,” he told her, “I’ll have one of the footmen stand guard at your door.”

  Her eyes widened with panic. “You’re leaving me?”

  “I’m afraid so. And I’m afraid I can’t come back. It isn’t proper for me to visit you in your room at night.” When he said this, Jonathan kissed her on the forehead. As soon as he did, he silently chided himself. One minute, he was talking about propriety, and the next minute, he was kissing her on the head. As a man, he wanted to comfort her. As a valet, he was crossing the line. “I’ll see you tomorrow morning.”

  “Don’t go…” Her voice squeaked as she made her plea. She couldn’t even bring herself to look at him, but for some reason, his presence comforted her.

  “I have to go. I’m the only one who knows about this. I have to talk to Nicholas, and I have to deal with Fairweather,” Jonathan said. “I can send for your mother, if you wish.”

  Evangeline shook her head. There was only one person she needed, but he insisted on leaving her. However, she knew he had a point. The sooner Eldrinn was vanquished, the sooner she could get some rest and regain her dignity. “Thank you, Jonathan,” she whispered to him as she retreated to her bed.

  He closed the door behind her, slowly, gently, keeping her in view as long as he could. Jonathan wished there was something else he could do for her, but he felt restrained. She was a lady and he was a servant. He couldn’t pretend he was her perfect hero.

  “Damn me and my bad luck,” he whispered to himself. Now, more than ever, Jonathan wished he was a proper gentleman. He wanted to woo her properly and comfort her in his arms.

  When he moved away from Evangeline’s door, Jonathan heard voices at the end of the hall.

  “…some kind of commotion.”

  “I don’t know.”

  “Ughh…nnnnnn.”

  Jonathan hurried down the hallway, back to the library. Nicholas was standing near the doorway with a couple of worried footmen. When Jonathan entered, he saw Eldrinn kneeling on the floor, whimpering like a babe, clutching his head in his hands.

  “What’s going on, Jonathan?” Nicholas asked, turning to his friend. “Do you have any idea?”

  At the mention of Jonathan’s name, Eldrinn’s eyes shot up. “HIM!” Evangeline’s attacker pointed an accusatory finger at the valet. “He’s the one who hit me! Him!”

  “Nice black eye,” Jonathan chuckled.

  “See!” Eldrinn wailed, “He flaunts it! He’s proud of it! See what sort of man you’ve hired, Nicholas? You see? Now you see?”

  “I might be more inclined to believe you, Eldrinn, if you weren’t in such hysterics,” Nicholas said. “And I might be more inclined to believe you if I didn’t know what a good man my valet is. If he hit you, I’m sure there was a reason for it.”

  Jonathan smiled, bolstered by his friend’s confidence in him. He moved closer to Nicholas, close enough to whisper, “He attacked Evangeline.”

  “Look at my eye!” Eldrinn started prodding his cheekbone, which was tender to the touch. “He… he hurt me!”

  Nicholas didn’t need to hear any more. After witnessing Eldrinn’s wailing, and hearing his friend’s claim, he knew what to do. He trusted one of his friends implicitly, and he was more than happy to act on that trust. “Pick yourself up, Fairweather.”

  Eldrinn peeled himself off th
e floor, as wobbly as a drunken man on ice. “You’re going to sack him, aren’t you? You’re going to sack him for striking me?”

  “On the contrary, Eldrinn,” Nicholas responded, a bit coldly, “I would have sacked him if he hadn’t hit you. Goodbye, Fairweather.”

  Eldrinn looked aghast, as if he’d seen a ghost—a ghost doing a waltz. “What?! Are my ears deceiving me? Are you really siding with him?”

  “Goodbye, Fairweather,” Nicholas repeated. “If you can’t find the door on your own, I can have one of my footmen show you out.”

  Eldrinn started toward the door, a bit unsteadily, glowering at his adversaries on the way out. “Stupid fool,” he hissed at Nicholas. “Dirty, ignorant, lowborn social climber.” He glanced over his shoulder on the way out. “That applies to both of you!”

  When Eldrinn disappeared, Nicholas gave a nod to one of the footman, who then followed Eldrinn out the door. “I should make sure he leaves.”

  “I wish there was a way to make sure he would never come back,” Jonathan said with a snort.

  “If he shows his face again, he won’t get a warm welcome. I’m sorry I invited him to stay here.”

  “It’s not your fault.”

  “What did he do to Evangeline?” As soon as he asked his question, Nicholas found it hard to draw a breath. He hated to think of Evangeline in peril. In spite of all her flaws, he cared about her like a sister. He certainly didn’t want anything bad to happen to her.

  “Would it be enough to say he would have gotten what he deserved if I had throttled him within an inch of his life?”

  “I certainly trust your judgment, my friend,” Nicholas replied.

  “I’m glad of it.”

  “And if I knew the whole truth, I’m sure I would have throttled him within an inch of his life as well.”

  Chapter Twenty Four