***
Jane enjoyed having Gerdy over for supper that evening while she, Jeremy and Gerdy sat at the dining room table. Gerdy had a tendency to talk about the past, but Jane didn’t mind listening to her, especially since Gerdy enjoyed going down memory lane.
“I tell you,” Gerdy said as she tore off a piece of her roll, “my daughter learned to stop picking cats up by their tails after that.”
Chuckling, Jane glanced at Jeremy who shot her an amused look. She blushed and turned her gaze back to Gerdy. Her cheek still tingled from where he’d kissed her earlier that day. As much as she wanted to ask him why he kissed her, she didn’t dare. Such a matter seemed much too intimate to discuss, even if he was her husband. Perhaps if they had a real marriage, it would’ve been different. Well, of course, it would’ve been different. It would’ve been based on love rather than necessity.
“It was good for her to learn how to handle animals,” Gerdy continued after she swallowed the part of the roll she had torn off. “Who knows if she might have treated a dog that way? A simple scratch from a cat is preferable to a bite from a dog.”
“I agree. If I had to choose which one to get, it would be the scratch,” Jeremy replied.
Noting the empty plates, Jane stood to collect them. “I’ll get dessert. I hope you like cake, Gerdy.”
Gerdy finished the remaining roll and nodded. “Anything you have is fine. I’m not picky.”
“The cake is for my benefit,” Jeremy told Gerdy. “I’m afraid it’s my weakness.”
“They say the way to a man’s heart is through his stomach.” She winked at Jane. “Every woman knows that.”
Her face warmed and she quickly gathered the plates, avoiding eye contact with Jeremy. “I’ll be right back with the cake.”
“Alright,” Gerdy began, “but will you make mine a small piece? I’m just about stuffed with your delicious roast.”
“It was a good roast,” Jeremy added, “but I made sure to save room for the cake.”
Gerdy laughed and waved her hand in his direction. “You’re awful, Preacher. Really, you are.”
Leaving them to engage in their playful banter, Jane went to the kitchen and set the plates in the sink. She picked up new plates and cut into the cake. To her surprise, Jeremy came into the room. “Are you making sure I give you a big enough slice?” she teased.
“I came to get Gerdy another cup of water.” With a grin, he said, “The thought did cross my mind about my slice, though. I saved a lot of room for the cake, you know.”
“I don’t know how. You ate a quarter of it at lunch.”
He took the pitcher and poured water into Gerdy’s glass. “Writing a sermon is hungry work.”
“Will another quarter slice do?”
“You know I can’t eat that much in front of a guest. Just give me half now and half after she’s gone.”
“Gerdy’s right about you. You are awful.” Though she tried to sound stern, her smile betrayed her.
She placed a small slice on Gerdy’s plate and started cutting his when he set down the cup, came up behind her, and wrapped his arms around her waist. “What if I don’t want to be proper all the time?”
His breath tickled her ear and she squirmed, shocked when her back touched his chest. He was wonderfully solid behind her, and she thought for sure her skin might catch on fire from the heat of his touch. Clearing her throat, she managed to squeak out, “You have to be proper all the time. You’re a preacher.”
He kissed the side of her neck. “I might be a preacher, but I’m also a man.” Letting go of her, he stepped next to her so she could look into his eyes. “You make me happy, Jane.”
She didn’t think it was possible to blush more than she already was, but her face grew even warmer. “You make me happy, too, Jeremy,” she softly admitted.
“I’m glad. I want to make you happy.” His lips brushed her cheek. “I better get going before she comes looking for me.” He took Gerdy’s glass and left the kitchen.
Jane touched her neck and then her cheek. She just might never wash those parts of her body again. Her hands shook as she put half a quarter slice of cake onto his plate. She saved him the other half and set it on the work table for him to eat later. Smoothing her hands on her skirt, she returned to the cake and cut her piece.
This was ridiculous! She’d handled cake many times before without trembling. So why couldn’t she do it now? Just because Jeremy touched her and kissed her in a way no man ever had wasn’t a good enough reason. As much as she told herself this, it didn’t help settle her nerves. Something was changing between them. She knew it; she just didn’t know how.
Chapter Fourteen
The next morning before they went to church, Jeremy was helping Jane into her coat. “Would you like to go for a walk later on today?”
“How is the temperature?” she asked.
“Not bad. Chilly but doable. We can make it a quick walk.”
She smiled. “Alright.” She turned her attention to buttoning the coat.
He blinked, surprised that her smile should affect him so. How many times had he seen her smile at him but not notice how attractive she was?
He put his coat and hat on before they left the house. As they walked to the church, he walked closer to her than necessary. He liked the way the sunlight filtered through the tree branches and settled on Jane, creating a glow that softened her features and emphasized the twinkle in her eyes. Smiling in contentment, he continued to enjoy the comfortable silence they shared. It was nice to be with someone and not feel the need to have to speak all the time.
During the service, he kept glancing Jane’s way. He wasn’t trying to look in her direction as often as he was, but he couldn’t help it. He found he wanted to get lost in her eyes, and when she smiled at him, he felt as if he was the only person who mattered in the building.
When they got home, she made hot chocolate like she’d been doing ever since the first snowfall. He’d gotten used to sitting next to her on the couch while they sipped their drinks by the fireplace. Their conversations ranged from light-hearted topics to things of a more serious nature, but on this particular day he wasn’t interested in talking. She rambled on about something. What that something was, he didn’t know. He was too busy thinking of a way to suggest it might be time for her to move her things into his bedroom.
“I can’t wait to see Edith again,” Jane said. “She wrote about her house, how much bigger it is than the one she lived in while she was here. She said she even has a wraparound porch. It must be lovely to sit out there in the evenings and enjoy the good weather. Well, no one can sit out there today, of course. It’s too cold for that. They’ll have to wait until early spring or late winter.”
He drummed his fingers on the arm of the couch and sighed. None of this was conducive to talk of a more intimate nature, and after five more minutes of listening to Jane compare the four seasons, he’d decided he had enough. He set his empty cup on the small table next to the couch and did the same with hers.
“I should take those into the kitchen,” she said as she got ready to stand up.
“I’ll get it,” he insisted and took her hand to stop her.
“Is there something on your mind?” she asked.
“Actually, there is.”
He brushed her cheek with his fingers and leaned forward to kiss her. The kiss must have taken her by surprise, for she didn’t respond right away. He brought his arms around her, pulled her close, and kissed her again. This time she returned his kiss, tentative at first but then warming up to him. When he ended the kiss, his lips turned up into a smile and she blushed.
“You’re beautiful,” he whispered. “I want to be your husband.”
Furrowing her eyebrows, she said, “You already are.”
“No. I mean really be your husband. More than in name. Would that be agreeable to you?”
She swallowed but nodded her consent.
He cupped the side of her face, and ki
ssed her again. Her lips were soft and warm, and though he knew he’d caught her off guard, he kept his lips on hers until she relaxed. He inched closer to her so he could slip his arm around her waist and pull her toward him. Her breasts pressed nicely against his chest, and he stroked the back of her neck with his fingers.
She let out a soft moan and wrapped her arms around his neck. Her enthusiasm for him didn’t go unnoticed or unappreciated. He parted his lips and traced hers with his tongue. She paused for a second before opening her mouth for him, and he slid his tongue into her mouth so he could brush her tongue with his. Deepening the kiss, he took his time in exploring her, enjoying everything he was learning.
His hand traveled from her neck and over her shoulder. Pulling away from her enough so that he could cup one of her breasts in his hand, he was rewarded with a slight gasp of pleasure. He grinned. This was just the beginning of the things they’d share when they came together as man and wife. He missed the emotional and physical connection this act provided.
His lips left her mouth and he gave her butterfly kisses down her jaw and to her neck. She shivered and tilted her head to the side so he could kiss more of her neck. He brushed his tongue gently against her skin, noting how pleasing she was to taste. His fingers caressed the curve of her breast and traced a circle over where he guessed her nipple to be. She sighed in contentment, so he suspected he guessed right and circled twice more before he searched for the buttons of her shirtwaist.
Bringing his mouth back to hers, he found her buttons and worked on undoing them, aware of the excitement pumping through his body, causing his erection to grow thicker. But he knew better than to rush things. For the time being, he’d keep his clothes on while he explored her and sought her pleasure. She ran her fingers through his hair as he finished with the buttons. He slid his hand under her shirtwaist and brought it back to her breast, noting her hardened nipple and brushed his thumb over it.
His arm held her against him while he continued his study of her breasts, moving from one to the other, trying to memorize how nicely they filled his palm. Eager to feel her bare flesh, he found the bottom of the chemise, slipped his hand under it, and groaned. Her skin was soft and warm, and when he teased the pink tip of her nipple, she shuddered. Moving the chemise up, he gave her another kiss before he lowered his head so he could skim her nipple with his tongue.
Her hands left his hair and clasped his shoulders. Encouraged, he let his hand travel down to her skirt which he pulled up until he could reach under it, mindful to work past her petticoats. When his fingers brushed the area between her legs, she gasped and wiggled against him. He continued to tease her with his tongue, enjoying the way she squirmed and moaned. Using more pressure, he rubbed the area between her legs, ensuring that when the time came, she’d be ready for his entry. He continued stroking her until she asked to take her clothes off.
He pulled away from her so he could remove her clothes with skilled fingers, careful not to rip anything but not wishing to give her time to think on what was about to happen in case she grew nervous and tensed up. Being her first time, it was bound to sting, but the more relaxed she was, the less uncomfortable it would be for her. With a quick look at the couch, he figured it wasn’t the best place to consummate their marriage and taking her to bed might break the spell, so he rushed through setting out some pillows and two blankets—one blanket he urged her to lie down on and the other to cover themselves when they were done.
As she settled on the floor, he quickly removed all of his clothing except his underwear, knowing she’d be curious about his body but figuring it was best she not dwell on his erection and what it meant for what was about to come. He took a moment to skim her body before he joined her on the floor. Taking her in his arms, he resumed kissing her until he felt her relax against him once more. Shifting on his side, he wrapped one of her legs over his waist and traced the curve of her thigh and butt. He couldn’t decide who was more worked up. Between her moans and his raspy breathing, he ventured they were both eager for what was to come, except she hadn’t experienced it yet so she probably only had a vague notion in mind of what to expect.
His hand slid down the curve of her butt until his fingers felt the moist folds of her woman’s flesh. He fought the urge to rub his erection against her lower abdomen. It was enough that it was snuggled there, but he didn’t want to draw too much attention to it until she was ready to receive him. And so he slipped a finger into her body, and she shifted to take him in deeper. She felt wonderful. Silky, hot, and wet. If there was anything lovelier than a woman’s body, he didn’t know what it was. He slid another finger in her and judged how tight she was. She didn’t seem too bad, but she needed some stretching before she’d be ready to receive him so he worked his fingers inside of her while he rubbed her sensitive nub with his thumb. Her body clenched around him and she moved her hips. He ventured another finger inside of her, noting the resistance at first but then she expanded for him.
She squirmed, and by the insistence in her moaning, she was getting close to her climax. He rolled her onto her back and yanked his underwear off, only half aware of her protests before he settled above her and slipped his fingers back into her. Leaning forward, his mouth settled on her breasts, so he could tease one nipple and then another. Meanwhile, he picked up from where he left off and stroked her core while rubbing her sensitive nub. Moaning, she ran her hands over his shoulders and up to his hair and then back down again. He had no idea she would be so vocal in her enjoyment of the activity but found it increased his arousal all the more.
She grew tense, and he knew she was about to peak. He stopped kissing her breasts so he could watch her, fascinated and pleased as he watched her climax. He continued to lightly rub her nub while her body clenched and unclenched his fingers. Smiling, he waited for the intensity of her climax to subside before he removed his fingers and settled between her legs. Not wishing to give her too much time to think about what was going to happen, he kissed her lips, her cheeks, and her jaw. She was relaxed beneath him, her fingers caressing his back.
He pressed his tip at her entrance and eased himself into her, gauging how tight she still was but thinking it wasn’t too bad. He stopped kissing her so he could watch her as he fully entered her. Except for the slight wince and soft groan, she gave no indication of being uncomfortable. Her body had accepted him, her flesh giving him a light squeeze. He gave her another kiss before he moved slowly out and then back in, noting it was easier this time so he did it again. Soon he was moving inside her with ease, and he purposely held off on coming right away. He wanted to take his fill of her, to savor each stroke as she tightened her legs around his waist, allowing him to go deeper inside her.
She matched his rhythm, starting slow and going faster, and when he couldn’t delay the inevitable any longer, he cried out and released his seed, his body tingling and shuddering above her. After a long moment, he collapsed in her arms, and she held him tightly to her. Even through the fog of their physical union, he kissed her cheek and murmured, “Jane, you are so lovely.”
Once he could move, he slid out of her and gathered the extra blanket before he collected her into his arms and put it over them. With his heart still beating rapidly and his breathing ragged, he smiled as she snuggled up to him. He took her hand and placed it over his heart. It’d been a long time since he felt so complete. Closing his eyes, he kissed the top of her head which rested on his shoulder and, without realizing it, fell softly into sleep.
***
Jane remained still for a long time, curled up against Jeremy. He was strong and warm. She never wanted to leave, and yet, she had to. As wonderful as it’d been to be kissed, held and touched by him, she couldn’t help but wonder if he wished he’d been with Rebecca. More than anything, she’d like to think he wanted to make love to her: Jane, not make love to a woman who happened to be his wife. But it was probably best if she didn’t think about it.
She could hear the steady rhythm of his hea
rtbeat as he slept. Her fingers brushed his chest, noting the light scattering of hair on it. The blanket was draped halfway down his chest, and her face warmed as she thought of what it hid. She hadn’t gotten a chance to see all of him. She chastised herself for even caring. It didn’t seem like the kind of thing a lady ought to concern herself with, but that part of him had been inside her and even now, she was aware of how different she felt between her legs. It was the oddest sensation, really, but it wasn’t bad. Definitely different. As if she’d just become aware that that part of her body existed. In some ways, it felt as if he was still inside of her—something she rather liked.
She couldn’t sleep. The sudden change in their marriage had her wide awake, and she didn’t see the point in lying down when there was work to be done. Besides, there was no point in taking the risk that he might wake up and be disappointed he was next to her instead of Rebecca. She made sure not to disturb him as she got up and collected her clothes. Once she washed up, she put on new undergarments and slipped into a shirtwaist and skirt. Deciding to do dishes, she crept into the parlor to collect the cups. She stopped and stared at him for a good moment. She hadn’t seen him as he slept before. He looked content. She wondered if that was how he always looked when he slept or if it was because of what they’d just done. Figuring he probably always looked that way, she went to the kitchen and set the cups in the sink.
As she got ready to wash the dishes, she glanced out the window and caught sight of two squirrels running across the ground. Patches of snow were melting, so the day was a good one to be outside. She tapped the edge of the sink and thought of what it might be like to see her child playing on a day such as this. Excitement welled up in her. It was now a possibility. If nothing else came from her time with Jeremy this afternoon, she might get a child and that made it worth it, regardless of the consequences.
While she washed the dishes, her mind went through possible names for a baby. For sure, she wouldn’t name a child Will, Marcy, or Susie. She wondered if she should name the child after someone she knew or pick a new name. Of course, it was silly to think of names without asking Jeremy. Perhaps he had a name he fancied. She would agree to whatever name he wanted. That settled it. She’d wait until she found out if she was expecting and ask him if he had a name reserved.
Bride of Second Chances Page 12
