STAR TREK THE NEXT GENERATION THE AUTOBIOGRAPHY OF JEAN-LUC PICARD

by David A. Goodman

  “You can stop running,” Guinan said. I turned and saw a prone figure on the ground. I went over to him. It was a species I didn’t recognize in camouflage clothing, with a ridge bisecting his forehead. I took his weapon, found a device on his belt that was jamming communicator transmissions, and shut it off.

  “I’ll take him back to the ship and turn him over to the New Paris authorities,” I said.

  “You’re taking me too,” she said. “I can’t stay here anymore.”

  “But…”

  “No buts; I had a perfectly good hiding place till you showed up. Where are you guys going?”

  “Well, our command base is Starbase 32…”

  “That sounds fine,” she said. She smiled. “Besides, aren’t you interested in getting to know me?”

  In truth, I was.

  * * *

  Captain Mazzara wasn’t happy about our new passenger, but was at least relieved that she let us store Laughton’s cargo in her home on New Paris. After I had enlisted several crewmembers to transfer our former captain’s extensive collection of artifacts and memorabilia, we left for Starbase 32.

  During the week-long trip, I spent a fair amount of my free time talking to Guinan. I did not learn much about her, however. She was an El-Aurian, a species I knew nothing about, and she gave me almost no details other than there were very few of them left in the Galaxy, and that they lived extremely long lives. This led to rumors about their blood being a source of immortality, which made them the victims of unscrupulous bounty hunters.

  Though I couldn’t draw much more information out of her, I unexpectedly found myself quite comfortable sharing my personal details. She was a compelling listener, and with very few questions I opened up about my history and feelings quite easily. I disclosed thoughts and ambitions that I had never mentioned to anyone. I quickly formed a connection with this woman, but there was nothing romantic about it. She just wanted to be my friend. I didn’t know why, but it was comforting nevertheless.

  It was, however, difficult for me to imagine her married to Captain Laughton, and she laughed when I mentioned that.

  “You should’ve seen Humphrey at 28,” she said. “Full of drive and ambition. He was going to explore the universe and make it his own.” I didn’t know whether it was a coincidence that the age she picked to mention just happened to be mine.

  “He had quite a career,” I said.

  “In the beginning,” Guinan said. “He started out as an explorer, but over time he decided the self-aggrandizement was more important to him, and he lost sight of his goals. His life became empty. And so did he. So he started collecting.”

  “I think it’s easy to lose sight of your goals,” I said. “It happens to me all the time.”

  “You have responsibilities, they can distract you.”

  “Yes, they can,” I said. I was verbalizing something that had been in the back of my mind since Laughton’s death. Out of a sense of loyalty, I had not broached the subject of a transfer to Captain Mazzara. I thought he would be more open to it than Laughton was, but I also knew that to ask too soon after Laughton’s death was inappropriate. Now, however, a month had gone by and the ship was running as smooth as it ever had.

  “You look like a man with a mission,” Guinan said. I had become preoccupied by my own thoughts. I smiled and excused myself, and called the captain on the intercom. He was in his quarters, and I requested to see him.

  On my way there, I let myself enjoy the possibility of finally leaving this ship. I was so energized and preoccupied that I walked into the captain’s quarters without buzzing. He was playing a game of three-dimensional chess with David.

  “What, you don’t knock anymore?” David said.

  “Sorry, sir,” I said.

  “It’s all right, Number One,” the captain said.

  “You should call him Number Two,” David said. I knew that this was some kind of insult, since David said it all the time, but I never learned what it meant.

  “David, please,” Mazzara said. “Give us a minute.” David begrudgingly got up and left.

  “What can I do for you, Jean-Luc,” Mazzara said. “You want a drink?” Mazzara went and got a bottle of green liquid that I later discovered was Aldebaran whiskey. I didn’t feel like drinking, but I also didn’t feel like saying no, so I took a glass. Mazzara indicated a seat in front of him. He seemed to have forgotten that I was the one who asked to see him; there was a lot on his mind.

  “I’ve been thinking a lot about the captain,” he said. “Yes, sir,” I said. “A tragedy.”

  “I know he wasn’t popular,” Mazzara said. “And now, I feel a lot of sympathy for him. You can’t understand command till you’ve had it. It’s the loneliest, most oppressive job in the whole universe. It’s a nightmare.”

  “Sir,” I said, “you’ve been quite good at it…”

  “Yeah, as soon as I got it I ran right off the bridge,” he said. “I’m sure the crew has come up with plenty of nicknames for me by now…” I had not considered until then what must be going on in Mazzara’s mind. Of course, a moment of bad judgment would haunt him, as it would any of us.

  “Sir, I think everyone has forgotten about it,” I said.

  “I doubt that,” he said. “In any case, I haven’t. I’ll remember it till the day I die. Everyone’s life turns on a few crucial moments, and mine turned that day on the bridge.” He took a long pull on his drink and placed the glass down on the desk. “I’ll be resigning my commission.”

  “Sir, you should reconsider.” This was, in my mind, tragic. Mazzara was letting one mistake define the rest of his life. “You’re a good officer…”

  “That’s very kind, but I’ve already informed Starfleet Command. When we arrive at Starbase 32, this ship will have a new captain.” Oh, wonderful, I thought. What broken-down failure had they found to take this ship? I couldn’t risk staying around to find out. I had to get Mazzara to approve my transfer immediately.

  “Sir, with all due respect to your situation, I came to talk to you about something. I would like a transfer…”

  “Jean-Luc, I think you’ll be needed here…”

  “I understand, but I have my own career to think about, and I just don’t think my future is on the Stargazer.”

  “Really? Even as its captain?”

  “Yes… wait… what?” The word “yes” was already on the way out of my mouth when I processed what he had said. “Me?”

  “You,” Mazzara said. “It was my suggestion, and frankly I don’t think command had any captains they wanted to spare. Or no one wanted it. Stargazer’s class is too large to be commanded by a commander, so you’ll skip a rank and be promoted to full captain. Or I can approve your transfer.”

  “No, sir,” I said. “I mean, yes, sir. I’ll happily accept. Thank you, sir.”

  “Congratulations,” Mazzara said. He picked up the bottle and poured himself another drink. “Dismissed.”

  I’d arrived at his cabin determined and excited to leave the Stargazer, and now I left having inherited it.

  I had no idea what to do. Do I tell everybody? There was no one I really wanted to tell, so I wandered the ship for hours and I found myself alone in the observation lounge. It was at the top of the primary hull and faced the stern of the ship. I stood there for a long time, watching the stars streak away at warp speed.

  “Good news?” It was Guinan. I hadn’t heard her come in.

  “What? Oh, yes… wait, how did you know?”

  “You were smiling,” she said. “Can you tell me?”

  “I’m… I’m the new captain.” Saying it out loud, I had to laugh. I felt joy over this news. I was 28 years old and was a captain. I’d only graduated from the academy six years ago.

  “That’s wonderful,” Guinan said. “Some childhood dreams do come true.” She already knew me well enough to know this, as well as a lot of other things. “What’s going to be your first act as shipmaster?”

  “I’m going to mak
e a sign,” I said. “ ‘No children allowed.’ ”

  CHAPTER FIVE

  “TO CAPTAIN FRANK MAZZARA, COMMANDING OFFICER, U.S.S. Stargazer, stardate 13209.2, you are hereby requested and required to relinquish command to Captain Jean-Luc Picard as of this date…”

  I stood on the deck of the main shuttlebay next to Captain Mazzara as he read the order off the PADD, in front of a good portion of the four hundred people who made up the crew. Mazzara turned to look at me. I played my part.

  “I relieve you, sir,” I said.

  “I stand relieved,” Mazzara said, then looked up and addressed the ship’s computer. “Computer, transfer all command codes to Captain Jean-Luc Picard, authorization Mazzara Beta Alpha 2.” The computer immediately responded.

  “U.S.S. Stargazer now in command of Jean-Luc Picard…” It was an amazing thing to hear. A computer voice had just made it official. I looked around at all the faces of the crew. I had fantasized my whole life about what this would feel like, and my imagination had never gotten it right. Because, as I stood and looked at all those expectant faces waiting for my first command, I realized in a flash that I was responsible for all of them.

  “If you don’t mind, I’d like to leave right away.” It was Mazzara, in a hurry to get off the ship. I hadn’t been fully aware of his embarrassment until he relayed it to me in his quarters, but since then it was all I could see. He didn’t make eye contact with the rest of the crew, and he certainly wasn’t staying around to say goodbye.

  “Of course,” I said. I turned to the crew. Here it was, my first order as captain. It was going to be nothing special. “All standing orders to remain in force until further notice. Prepare shuttlebay for launch. Dismissed.” I then escorted Mazzara to the shuttle, where his two sons awaited him.

  “It was a pleasure serving with you, sir,” I said. I held out my hand and Mazzara shook it perfunctorily. I then turned to Anthony and David. “Good luck to you both.”

  David ignored me and followed Mazzara onto the shuttle. It probably wasn’t David’s best day that I, the officer whom he seemed the most disdainful of, now had his father’s job. Anthony, however, hesitated a moment. His father, before I assumed command, had had his son transferred off the ship. It was only then that I realized that perhaps Anthony didn’t want to go.

  “Um… sorry about the egg,” he said. “I hope I can serve with you again.” I smiled, nodded, and he boarded the shuttle. As the hatch shut, I thought to myself: Over my dead body.

  * * *

  We were circling Starbase 32, a planetary facility on Tagan III. There were limited dry dock services in orbit, but I planned to make use of them as much as I could. I had one goal in mind: get as many repairs and upgrades done as possible to the Stargazer before my replacement crew arrived. I needed a new conn officer (to replace me) as well as a new ops officer, security chief, and doctor. And one of those positions would also be my first officer.

  I headed back to my cabin and passed a lot of crewmen in the corridors, exchanging friendly nods. I had enough relationships on the Stargazer that I felt there was plenty of goodwill at my promotion. Still, there were some officers who I knew did not take the news well. One of them intercepted me outside my cabin.

  “May I speak with you a moment… sir?” It was Lieutenant Commander Black, the communications officer. I noticed that the “sir” took an extra moment; he wasn’t comfortable with the change in our relative status. I ushered him inside.

  “I would like to make a request,” Black said. Undoubtedly, he wanted a transfer, which I would grant. Though he would actually be a big loss to the ship—it was doubtful I could find anyone with his experience—I didn’t want to stand in the way of anyone who didn’t want to be here.

  “Go ahead.”

  “I’d like to throw my hat in the ring for first officer.”

  “Oh.” This I did not expect. I was all set to offer to give him a recommendation to another ship. “I’ve already offered the position to someone else. I’m sorry.” I’d only just assumed command, but had made arrangements for a new first officer a few days before.

  “I see,” he said. “That’s disappointing. You’re not… you’re not replacing me are you?”

  “No.”

  “Good, thanks,” he said. “I’m really looking forward to serving under your command.” With that, he left. This came as a considerable surprise to me. Somehow, despite Black’s obvious jealousy of my promotions over him, I’d earned his respect. Just that bit of amity made me think if I hadn’t already had someone else ready to take that post, I might have considered him.

  A few minutes later, I had put on my new rank pin, and headed “upstairs.” I wanted to sit in my new chair.

  “Captain on the bridge,” Black said, as I entered. This was a leftover protocol from the days of the Earth navies; when a captain entered the bridge, it was carefully noted in a written log so that if there was a grounding or collision, the captain’s presence was a matter of formal record. On a starship, the sensor logs placed me and every other member of the ship at all hours. Black indulging in it was a show of respect, one he’d never shown to Laughton or Mazzara.

  I looked around the room: the overall impression was of anarchy. Half the control panels in the room were open; maintenance crews were either scanning underneath them with tricorders or ripping out and replacing the innards with new parts. I went toward the captain’s chair and stopped. An engineer stood on a small anti-grav platform and rewired optical cabling in the ceiling. The small floating disk was almost directly over the captain’s chair. I would have to ask him to move to sit down. I decided against it, and instead walked past the captain’s chair to the ops station, where Engineer Scully worked underneath the control panel. He noticed me as I approached.

  “Hey there, sir,” he said. He managed to walk the line between informality and respect, and I had to accept him as he was. Forty years older than me, and having served on the ship since before I was born, it was a lot more his than mine.

  “How go the upgrades?”

  “The ship’s systems weren’t really designed to handle a lot of this new stuff, but we’re doing the best we can,” he said. The technology of the Stargazer was years out of date, and the best I could hope for, barring a complete refit, was patchwork repairs. The ship would never be top of the line again, but as I stood there on that mess of a bridge, it didn’t matter. The old lady was mine, and I loved it.

  “Sir, Starbase 32 signals crew replacements standing by to beam aboard,” Black said. This was sooner than I expected. I just had to hope there might be a delay in getting my orders so that most of the work I’d had started could be completed. I left the bridge and headed down to the transporter room.

  As soon as I found out I was getting command, I knew I wanted a friend as my first officer. I thought of Corey and Marta, but knew they were both already up the chain of command on much better ships than the Stargazer: Corey was chief of security on the Ajax, and Marta was already the first officer of the Kyushu. Maybe I didn’t want to put them in an awkward position, or maybe I didn’t want to face rejection, but I didn’t ask either of them. The only person I asked gave me an immediate yes, because for him it was a big step up.

  “Request permission to come aboard, sir,” Walker Keel said, as he stepped off the transporter. I warmly shook his hand. We hadn’t been in touch that much since I left Reliant, but I knew he was ready to move on. With him on the pad were my new security chief, conn officer, and doctor. Three humans and one Edosian.

  “Lieutenant Cheva reporting for duty, sir,” Cheva said. I’d gotten her a promotion and was happy to have her as my chief of security. I hadn’t forgotten the vital role she’d played on Milika, and how that had changed my career. Behind her, the new medical officer stepped forward.

  “Commander Ailat,” I said. “Welcome aboard.” I’d never seen an Edosian in person before. Her orange skin, three arms and three legs fascinated me. Walking seemed impossible—as each le
g took a step forward, her lower half rotated; three steps was a full circle.

  “Thank you, Captain,” Ailat said. Her voice was high-pitched, with a staccato speech pattern.

  “And let me introduce your new conn officer,” Walker said. I’d been so riveted by Ailat I’d ignored the young man standing toward the back. Walker had recommended him; he knew his family and had helped him get into the academy, which he’d just graduated from a couple of years before. Despite his slightly awkward bearing, he had an affable smile.

  “Ensign Jack Crusher, reporting for duty, sir,” he said.

  * * *

  “You have all your crew replacements,” Admiral Sulu said, “so I’m hoping you’re ready to leave.” I was in my quarters, and she was on my desk viewscreen, speaking from her office on Starbase 32. Though she was the commanding officer for this entire sector, she was sociable and engaging, and seemed very young for someone in her sixties. I never wanted to disappoint a superior officer, and Demora Sulu’s casual authority heightened that need.

  “Yes, ma’am, we’re ready,” I said. That was pretty far from the truth; I’d begun too many repairs and upgrades, gambling they’d be finished before Stargazer might be sent into action.

  “Good,” she said. “We’ve lost contact with a scientific research facility in system L-374. We’d like you to check it out.”

  “Can you tell me what the nature of their research is?”

  “It’s all in the briefing packet I’m sending now,” Admiral Sulu said. “It’s an old research facility that’s been studying an ancient derelict spaceship. You’re to depart as soon as possible.”

  “Right away, Admiral,” I said, again not really sure if I could leave.

  “Sulu out,” the admiral said, and the picture went off. I then called Scully on the intercom.

  “Scully here,” he said.

  “How much longer to complete all the repairs and upgrades?” I said.

  “We’re done with some stuff, but there’s still more I’d like to do. How much time do I have?”